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View Full Version : What to do, family breaking up... What about cats?


the wharf rat
March 1st 04, 09:50 PM
The short story is that my wife and I are divorcing, and
there's a problem with what to do about our 4 cats.

Cat 1 is "my" cat; when we adopted her to be a companion to someone
who's gone on to the Rainbow Bridge she chose me as her person to play
and cuddle with. Eventually we got cat 4, who also chose me... But cat 1
and cat 4 hate each other and cat 1 is terrified of cat 4, to the point
that poor cat 1 moved under the dresser in the bedroom and wouldn't even
come downstairs to eat. But after we put food and water and litter in
the bedroom she seemed to adjust. I make sure to spend time with her and
she still comes to sleep with mne every night. Cat 4 has me the rest of
the time, following me around and making sure to stay close although he's
not a touchy feely playful cat like cat 1.

But the problem is that I can't keep the house, and whatever
apartment I move into won't have a nice safe bedroom for cat 1. If I
take cat 1 and cat 4 (my cats) then cat 1 will almost certianly be very
unhappy, since cat 4 will terrorize her and she wont have her own space.
Or will she? Would the change in population and place be enough to reset
the dynamics? I tend to think not.

I can't bear the thought of leaving her. But I can't abandon
cat 4 (even to the hopefully caring attention of my former spouse) since
he was an abused kitten we rescued and he's only now coming to really
trust me... He's 3 years old and just now allows me to pet him just a little.
(Up to now when he saw a hand he'd run...) Does anyone think I might
manage both living together or is the only way to give up one and if
so which? I really want Cats 1, 2, and 4... Three cats in a 1 bedroom
two of which hate each other?

Advice please...

Willows
March 2nd 04, 11:55 AM
> Advice please...

Keep them with you, they've been living and not getting along now, I
very much doubt it will be worse and who knows the change and having two
in the house instead of four might make it better. Or they may just go
on having there own spaces. I have no doubt that even with their
dislike for each other they will be happier staying with you.

Just give them their own space even in a small apartment it can be done
two set of everything feed them apart as you have been and carry on as
normal as you can. They will adjust.

Willows
March 2nd 04, 11:55 AM
> Advice please...

Keep them with you, they've been living and not getting along now, I
very much doubt it will be worse and who knows the change and having two
in the house instead of four might make it better. Or they may just go
on having there own spaces. I have no doubt that even with their
dislike for each other they will be happier staying with you.

Just give them their own space even in a small apartment it can be done
two set of everything feed them apart as you have been and carry on as
normal as you can. They will adjust.

kilikini
March 2nd 04, 04:39 PM
"Willows" > wrote in message
...
>
> > Advice please...
>
> Keep them with you, they've been living and not getting along now, I
> very much doubt it will be worse and who knows the change and having two
> in the house instead of four might make it better. Or they may just go
> on having there own spaces. I have no doubt that even with their
> dislike for each other they will be happier staying with you.
>
> Just give them their own space even in a small apartment it can be done
> two set of everything feed them apart as you have been and carry on as
> normal as you can. They will adjust.
>

My two cats *hate* each other. Well, let me rephrase that. Moire', my 8
year old orange tiger stripe, *hates* Reggie, my 7 year old little black and
white cat. Simple equation, Moire' was here first. In my old house, Reggie
stayed outdoors - that was her chosen spot - all day and only came inside to
sleep with me (the bedroom was also Reggie's turf). Moire', on the other
hand, stayed inside all day - her choice - and only went outside to go to
the bathroom. Three months ago, I moved to an apartment setting and now
both cats are inside together. It wasn't fun for the first month, I'll tell
you that, but the cats have worked out their *space*. I do have to keep out
two bowls of food and two water glasses, tho, to help prevent their
crossing of paths. Now, there are much fewer hissy fits and growls. Well
fewer between the cats, more with the dog and the cats. <g> A 1 year old,
hyper, curious Australian Shepherd and two older cats in an apartment does
not make for cozy living! But it's always entertaining! (For all of you
dog-people, I have a *very* large lanai, Kai - the dog - is not suffering
for lack of space, exercise or love!) Back to the original topic at hand,
please take the cats with you. They'll work it out.

kilikini

kilikini
March 2nd 04, 04:39 PM
"Willows" > wrote in message
...
>
> > Advice please...
>
> Keep them with you, they've been living and not getting along now, I
> very much doubt it will be worse and who knows the change and having two
> in the house instead of four might make it better. Or they may just go
> on having there own spaces. I have no doubt that even with their
> dislike for each other they will be happier staying with you.
>
> Just give them their own space even in a small apartment it can be done
> two set of everything feed them apart as you have been and carry on as
> normal as you can. They will adjust.
>

My two cats *hate* each other. Well, let me rephrase that. Moire', my 8
year old orange tiger stripe, *hates* Reggie, my 7 year old little black and
white cat. Simple equation, Moire' was here first. In my old house, Reggie
stayed outdoors - that was her chosen spot - all day and only came inside to
sleep with me (the bedroom was also Reggie's turf). Moire', on the other
hand, stayed inside all day - her choice - and only went outside to go to
the bathroom. Three months ago, I moved to an apartment setting and now
both cats are inside together. It wasn't fun for the first month, I'll tell
you that, but the cats have worked out their *space*. I do have to keep out
two bowls of food and two water glasses, tho, to help prevent their
crossing of paths. Now, there are much fewer hissy fits and growls. Well
fewer between the cats, more with the dog and the cats. <g> A 1 year old,
hyper, curious Australian Shepherd and two older cats in an apartment does
not make for cozy living! But it's always entertaining! (For all of you
dog-people, I have a *very* large lanai, Kai - the dog - is not suffering
for lack of space, exercise or love!) Back to the original topic at hand,
please take the cats with you. They'll work it out.

kilikini