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lulu
October 23rd 05, 03:48 PM
Until three weeks ago we had two cats one was 13yrs old and the other is 15yrs old, both females, both persians. Sadly we had to have the 13yr old put to sleep (due to a serious illness) and since then our remaining cats behaviour has changed. She is a very loving cat and used to love to show affection to the other cat by washing her. They also shared a bed together. She has always been a talker and meows at you when you talk to her, but now her meow has changed to a more urgent demanding one and it's continuous, she even meows at the back door to be let in now and she has never done that before. We don't understand why this is and we are very worried about her. We can only presume that she's missing our other cat. We don't want to start telling her off as she is easily frightened. Does anyone have any answers or suggestions please.

We would much appreciate it!

Thanks

Lulu

No More Retail
October 23rd 05, 07:43 PM
Purrs to you for you loss. You have to understand cats are like humans the
sense change, stress and are very keen to environmental factors. She
lost her friend and is missing her she is probably picking up your
grieving and is responding to you by trying to be there for you the only way
she knows how to meow. if she is meowing with one in the room she is trying
to find her friend don't scold her what so ever just go over to her pick
her up show her some more attention. it will take a little while for both
of you to get over the loss. P.s. Persians are very social cat and you may
want to think about a new friend

Purrs for your loss

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet
goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run
and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and
comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and
vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just
as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each
miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops
and looks into the distance. Their bright eyes are intent; Their eager
bodies
quiver. Suddenly they begin to run from the group, flying over the green
grass, Their legs carrying them faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friends finally meet,
you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy
kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress their beloved head, and
you look once more into the trusting eyes of your friends, so long gone from
your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
*** " And nothing but peace and the love of your Dear Friends"****

Author Unknown of the original poem a few lines have been changed

This should be added ***
****"Always remember We will be there even if you can't see us. We are
always Watching and Waiting. That cool puff of air you feel across your
cheek, that fleeting touch, the feeling you have that I was walking across
your bed, that moment you swear you can hear us, that flicker of movement
out of the corner of your eye. Is just our way of saying I love you and I
am with you always even in the darkest time We Will Always Be There. Till
our paws touch again always know we love you and cherished our special time
together"***

Author
( NO MORE RETAIL )

Karen
October 23rd 05, 07:57 PM
On 2005-10-23 09:48:19 -0500, lulu > said:

>
> Until three weeks ago we had two cats one was 13yrs old and the other is
> 15yrs old, both females, both persians. Sadly we had to have the 13yr
> old put to sleep (due to a serious illness) and since then our
> remaining cats behaviour has changed. She is a very loving cat and
> used to love to show affection to the other cat by washing her. They
> also shared a bed together. She has always been a talker and meows at
> you when you talk to her, but now her meow has changed to a more urgent
> demanding one and it's continuous, she even meows at the back door to be
> let in now and she has never done that before. We don't understand why
> this is and we are very worried about her. We can only presume that
> she's missing our other cat. We don't want to start telling her off as
> she is easily frightened. Does anyone have any answers or suggestions
> please.
> We would much appreciate it!
>
> Thanks
>
> Lulu

they have to go through a grief process, like us (perhaps not always in
the same way, but they miss their companion that they have known
forever and life is VERY different for them now. It is stressful and
they don't understand it.) and the best thing you can do is give her
lots of extra attention and even talk to her about the other cat and
how you miss the 13 y.o. too. It really can take months to adjust to
the stress of a loss like that. Dynamics change. She could even become
sick herself, so keep an eye out for health changes. I'm very sorry for
your loss. It's just tough all the way around.

Gail
October 23rd 05, 08:35 PM
As the other posters have said, your cat is grieving the loss of her friend.
It will take time. If she exhibits other changes in behavior (ie urinating
inappropriately, not eating, etc), she should then see a vet. Sometimes
stress triggers physical illness. Be sure to give her lots of love and
attention to get her through this time.
Gail
"lulu" > wrote in message
...
>
> Until three weeks ago we had two cats one was 13yrs old and the other is
> 15yrs old, both females, both persians. Sadly we had to have the 13yr
> old put to sleep (due to a serious illness) and since then our
> remaining cats behaviour has changed. She is a very loving cat and
> used to love to show affection to the other cat by washing her. They
> also shared a bed together. She has always been a talker and meows at
> you when you talk to her, but now her meow has changed to a more urgent
> demanding one and it's continuous, she even meows at the back door to be
> let in now and she has never done that before. We don't understand why
> this is and we are very worried about her. We can only presume that
> she's missing our other cat. We don't want to start telling her off as
> she is easily frightened. Does anyone have any answers or suggestions
> please.
>
> We would much appreciate it!
>
> Thanks
>
> Lulu
>
>
> --
> lulu

Barb
October 23rd 05, 09:58 PM
When my 15 year old cat died my 2 year old cat went into a tailspin. They
had hung out together and washed and kissed each other all the time. The 2
year old Pickles wasn't walking right one day and when I called her she came
and lay down on her side before getting to me. I rushed her to the vet.
She wouldn't walk for him but he took her temperature and she had a little
fever. He gave her a cortisone shot and said if she wasn't fine in a couple
days he would run a bunch of tests. In 2 days she was fine and has been
fine ever since. This was all last winter.

Believe me, they do miss their little pals and I wonder if they think we are
somehow responsible for the absence of the other cat.

--
Barb
Of course I don't look busy,
I did it right the first time.

No More Retail
October 23rd 05, 11:08 PM
No I don't think so but they remember if you are mean to them

October 24th 05, 08:03 AM
Your cat is grieving. Three months isn't very long to adjust to the
loss of a companion of 10+ years. She's trying to figure out what
happened and if the other is coming back or not. All you can do is love
her and try to help her feel secure. You could also consider going to
down to the local shelter and asking if they have a calm, senior cat
who needs a home and bring that cat home to be with your girl.

cybercat
October 24th 05, 02:56 PM
> wrote in message
oups.com...
> Your cat is grieving. Three months isn't very long to adjust to the
> loss of a companion of 10+ years. She's trying to figure out what
> happened and if the other is coming back or not. All you can do is love
> her and try to help her feel secure. You could also consider going to
> down to the local shelter and asking if they have a calm, senior cat
> who needs a home and bring that cat home to be with your girl.
>

I think this is a good suggestion. I dread the time when one of my
cats is left alone, and when the time comes, I want to try to find
another companion as soon as I can.

whitershadeofpale
October 26th 05, 01:29 AM
lulu wrote:
> Until three weeks ago we had two cats one was 13yrs old and the other is
> 15yrs old, both females, both persians. Sadly we had to have the 13yr
> old put to sleep
> We would much appreciate it!
>
> Thanks

> lulu


Sorry about your cat. I reckon the other is sad too. Sounds like she
wants comforted.

Are you going to get another cat? I know it may be too soon, but maybe
just maybe this would help the sad cat feel a tad better?

Again, sorry for your loss. Best to everyone.

bigbad

Juls
October 29th 05, 04:46 PM
In article >,
lulu > wrote:

> Until three weeks ago we had two cats one was 13yrs old and the other is
> 15yrs old, both females, both persians. Sadly we had to have the 13yr
> old put to sleep (due to a serious illness) and since then our
> remaining cats behaviour has changed. She is a very loving cat and
> used to love to show affection to the other cat by washing her. They
> also shared a bed together. She has always been a talker and meows at
> you when you talk to her, but now her meow has changed to a more urgent
> demanding one and it's continuous, she even meows at the back door to be
> let in now and she has never done that before. We don't understand why
> this is and we are very worried about her. We can only presume that
> she's missing our other cat. We don't want to start telling her off as
> she is easily frightened. Does anyone have any answers or suggestions
> please.
>
> We would much appreciate it!
>
> Thanks
>
> Lulu

It's grief and possibly not understanding where her partner went.

I just went through this with Jack, who is about 7 or 8, and his brother
Dmitri, who was 16. Dmitri died in his sleep one night, and Jack was
devastated. (So was I)

He went into a full depression and I was sick with worry. I tried
everything, extra love and assurance, taking him outside to the garden,
tried to play games (not interested)

I ended up getting him a new kitten, and at first, he wasn't that
appreciative. I took them through the program where you start them in
separate rooms, introduce smells, and eventually do a face to face.

Now they're happy as clams and adore one another. Jack is completely out
of his depression, and his love and attention are focused on his little
sister.

At your cat's age, I'm not sure another cat would be the answer. If so,
definitely an older cat, not a kitten. And it might or might not be the
answer.

Time will help, but cats do grieve and get depressed, so be sure and
watch to make sure she's eating enough.

Definitely do not "tell her off." She needs extra love right now. Be
very gentle, and possibly just talk to her a lot in a calm, loving
manner. Pet her a lot, and try and engage her in some play. She's
feeling very insecure now, and lonely.

Does she like to be brushed? Brushing is an activity that Jack likes and
I did it a lot more after Dmitri died. At least for the moment, it
calmed and reassured him.

But it took him some time to recover from the loss.

Most importantly, be very patient and reassuring. Let her know she's
still got you and that you all miss the other kitty.

If she doesn't come around after a month or two, a trip to the vet might
be in order. And do watch her eating!

I'm sorry for your loss.

Juls

--
j-u-l-i at e-c-t dot o-r-g
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