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View Full Version : Lonely cat...too soon for a new one?


The Other Mike
October 30th 06, 05:51 PM
About 3 years ago my wife and I moved in together...I had 2 cats and
she had 1. Since it was a new house, new territory, I think this
helped in getting them together. After a short while they were all
sleeping together and playing. We lost one of mine in July and now we
just lost my other one last Friday leaving her cat (who is 16 years
old) by himself. His demeanor has definately changed since this last
one passed away...he seems more needy and lonely. We're thinking of
bringing another cat into the house to help...but we don't know if
he'll accept the new cat (we'd like to adopt an older cat...8 years or
so) this soon. Do cats have a grieving timeframe where we'd need to
wait a little while longer? Or is it better to do it now (following
all the "rules" in bringing a new cat into a house with an existing
one)?

Lynne
October 30th 06, 06:30 PM
on Mon, 30 Oct 2006 17:51:46 GMT, The Other Mike > wrote:

> About 3 years ago my wife and I moved in together...I had 2 cats and
> she had 1. Since it was a new house, new territory, I think this
> helped in getting them together. After a short while they were all
> sleeping together and playing. We lost one of mine in July and now we
> just lost my other one last Friday leaving her cat (who is 16 years
> old) by himself. His demeanor has definately changed since this last
> one passed away...he seems more needy and lonely. We're thinking of
> bringing another cat into the house to help...but we don't know if
> he'll accept the new cat (we'd like to adopt an older cat...8 years or
> so) this soon. Do cats have a grieving timeframe where we'd need to
> wait a little while longer? Or is it better to do it now (following
> all the "rules" in bringing a new cat into a house with an existing
> one)?

I don't know the answer to your question, but I do think it is very wise
for you to bring an adult into the house, as opposed to a kitten, given the
age of your kitty. I would caution you to make sure you know the cat you
plan to adopt very well before bringing him or her home (if possible).

I'm terribly sorry for your loss.

--
Lynne

Buddy's Mom
October 30th 06, 06:47 PM
Personally I would not get another cat until the 16 year old dies. He
will come back around in a bit. He needs some TLC just as you and your
wife do after losing the other kitties. He should be acting better in
a month or two. I had two kitties and when one was 16 the other one
died. The 16 year old seemed to open up so much more after a couple of
months passed. He loved being the only cat and all the attention. He
lived to be 20 years and 3 months and never seemed to miss his sister
after the first couple of months. Good luck!

The Other Mike wrote:
> About 3 years ago my wife and I moved in together...I had 2 cats and
> she had 1. Since it was a new house, new territory, I think this
> helped in getting them together. After a short while they were all
> sleeping together and playing. We lost one of mine in July and now we
> just lost my other one last Friday leaving her cat (who is 16 years
> old) by himself. His demeanor has definately changed since this last
> one passed away...he seems more needy and lonely. We're thinking of
> bringing another cat into the house to help...but we don't know if
> he'll accept the new cat (we'd like to adopt an older cat...8 years or
> so) this soon. Do cats have a grieving timeframe where we'd need to
> wait a little while longer? Or is it better to do it now (following
> all the "rules" in bringing a new cat into a house with an existing
> one)?

Rene S.
October 30th 06, 07:39 PM
The Other Mike wrote:
> About 3 years ago my wife and I moved in together...I had 2 cats and
> she had 1. Since it was a new house, new territory, I think this
> helped in getting them together. After a short while they were all
> sleeping together and playing. We lost one of mine in July and now we
> just lost my other one last Friday leaving her cat (who is 16 years
> old) by himself. His demeanor has definately changed since this last
> one passed away...he seems more needy and lonely. We're thinking of
> bringing another cat into the house to help...but we don't know if
> he'll accept the new cat (we'd like to adopt an older cat...8 years or
> so) this soon. Do cats have a grieving timeframe where we'd need to
> wait a little while longer? Or is it better to do it now (following
> all the "rules" in bringing a new cat into a house with an existing
> one)?

I agree with what Lynne said: bringing an adult cat would certainly be
a better idea than a kitten or rambuctious young cat. I'd suggest
visiting your local shelter and talking to the staff there. Tell them
your situation and the personality of your remaining kitty. They should
be able to help you match the personalities so there is less stress on
this kitty. Of course, introducing them very slowly will be key
too--take as much time as they need.

Rene

kitkat via CatKB.com
October 31st 06, 12:47 AM
I think the potential stress on your 16 yr old if he/she doesn't get along
with the new cat is too great a risk.

Some cats gel - others don't. And often it takes several months for cats to
move from aggressive strangers into "friends". The loss of your two cats is
certainly a stress on your remaining cat, but it may be too risky to
introduce a new stress.

Perhaps, besides being "lonely" - your cat is sad because has lost a playmate.
I would suggest getting some new toys and play with your cat one on one. It
may perk him/her up.

--
Message posted via CatKB.com
http://www.catkb.com/Uwe/Forums.aspx/cat-health/200610/1

bobblespin
October 31st 06, 05:33 PM
The Other Mike > wrote in
:

> About 3 years ago my wife and I moved in together...I had 2 cats and
> she had 1. Since it was a new house, new territory, I think this
> helped in getting them together. After a short while they were all
> sleeping together and playing. We lost one of mine in July and now we
> just lost my other one last Friday leaving her cat (who is 16 years
> old) by himself. His demeanor has definately changed since this last
> one passed away...he seems more needy and lonely. We're thinking of
> bringing another cat into the house to help...but we don't know if
> he'll accept the new cat (we'd like to adopt an older cat...8 years or
> so) this soon. Do cats have a grieving timeframe where we'd need to
> wait a little while longer? Or is it better to do it now (following
> all the "rules" in bringing a new cat into a house with an existing
> one)?

I would suggest waiting until your cat is gone, then getting 2 cats who
have always lived together and need a new home together. I often see this
in ads where they have to find homes for two cats who can't be separated.
This would benefit 2 cats instead of 1.

Bobble

--
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