PDA

View Full Version : How do you decide when to euthanize?


Moongal
January 15th 07, 12:19 AM
I'm going to have to make that decision at some point. I feel that it's
going to be sooner than later. My 18 year old cat has CRF. He's lost so
much weight. He's basically just a skeleton.

He doesn't seem to be in any pain yet. He still likes lots of love and he
purrs. He no longer kneads though. I don't think he has the strength. I
no it's not time yet, but when it is time will I know? I don't to do it too
late, or too soon. If he still enjoys being alive I want him around, but at
the same time, if he's suffering I don't want to do it too late.

For those that have had to have a pet euthanized how did you know it was the
right time?

Matthew
January 15th 07, 12:28 AM
This is the hardest question that gets asked here. This question sits in
the back of our mind in all of us. The only thing any of us can say is you
will know when it is the right time. I wish it could be a better answer but
you will know when it is time for your friend to cross the bridge.

"Moongal" > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> I'm going to have to make that decision at some point. I feel that it's
> going to be sooner than later. My 18 year old cat has CRF. He's lost so
> much weight. He's basically just a skeleton.
>
> He doesn't seem to be in any pain yet. He still likes lots of love and he
> purrs. He no longer kneads though. I don't think he has the strength.
> I no it's not time yet, but when it is time will I know? I don't to do it
> too late, or too soon. If he still enjoys being alive I want him around,
> but at the same time, if he's suffering I don't want to do it too late.
>
> For those that have had to have a pet euthanized how did you know it was
> the right time?
>

Lynne
January 15th 07, 12:50 AM
on Mon, 15 Jan 2007 00:28:02 GMT, "Matthew"
> wrote:

> The only thing any of us can
> say is you will know when it is the right time. I wish it could be a
> better answer but you will know when it is time for your friend to
> cross the bridge.

I'm not sure if I agree with what you say here, Matthew. I think sometimes
we tend to hold on too long. The right time for our beloved pets may be
sooner than we want to believe. It's certainly always too soon for us.
Cats are stoic and purring is not an indication that they are happy.

It's a decision each of us has to make on our own, though, and it's never
going to feel like the right time. However we each do the best we can and
that's all anyone can expect from themselves.

I'm sorry you are facing this decision, Moongal. It hurts, I know.

--
Lynne

No Way Dam Spammers
January 15th 07, 12:56 AM
Moongal,

That is so sad. I've found that when you can say you did everything that you
could, when the cat's quality of life is poor, when there's no chance of
getting better, and you can say that the cat had a good long life, or at
least a good life, then you won't feel guilty after putting your sweetheart
to sleep.

No matter what, you'll be heartbroken, but if you knew there was nothing
else you could do, (which there really isn't in the case of CRF), and your
cat had a full long life -- which he had so far-- your broken heart will be
filled with relief before long.

I think you said the key words in your post: you don't want your friend to
suffer. It doesn't sound like it's time yet for him; he's not suffering now,
but you are. Your pain will help you know when it's time for your love to go
before you and wait for you on the other side. It does get better in time.

Ned


"Moongal" > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> I'm going to have to make that decision at some point. I feel that it's
> going to be sooner than later. My 18 year old cat has CRF. He's lost so
> much weight. He's basically just a skeleton.
>
> He doesn't seem to be in any pain yet. He still likes lots of love and he
> purrs. He no longer kneads though. I don't think he has the strength.
> I no it's not time yet, but when it is time will I know? I don't to do it
> too late, or too soon. If he still enjoys being alive I want him around,
> but at the same time, if he's suffering I don't want to do it too late.
>
> For those that have had to have a pet euthanized how did you know it was
> the right time?
>

Matthew
January 15th 07, 02:43 AM
"Lynne" > wrote in message
m...
> on Mon, 15 Jan 2007 00:28:02 GMT, "Matthew"
> > wrote:
>
>> The only thing any of us can
>> say is you will know when it is the right time. I wish it could be a
>> better answer but you will know when it is time for your friend to
>> cross the bridge.
>
> I'm not sure if I agree with what you say here, Matthew. I think
> sometimes
> we tend to hold on too long. The right time for our beloved pets may be
> sooner than we want to believe. It's certainly always too soon for us.
> Cats are stoic and purring is not an indication that they are happy.
>

You are right on that but even though we don't want to believe that it could
be happening and hope for the best outcome. We are desperate to hold onto
something that we love with all our heart and soul. We still know it is
time even if it is the hardest thing to admit to ourselves.

It might be me in my old age and all the things I have seen and experienced
in my life has made me face the veil that shields our soul and face the
facts. It is the hardest descision anyone could ever make.

> It's a decision each of us has to make on our own, though, and it's never
> going to feel like the right time. However we each do the best we can and
> that's all anyone can expect from themselves.
>
> I'm sorry you are facing this decision, Moongal. It hurts, I know.
>
> --
> Lynne

Moongal
January 15th 07, 11:46 AM
Thank you everyone. This just sucks.

He hasn't been deteriorating at all in the last few days, in fact he seems
to be eating more, yet I've been getting this strong feeling that it's going
to be soon.

He's a special guy. He was a stray that picked me to live with. One day,
years ago, he jumped into an open window, walked up to both my cats and gave
them each a smack, went to their food dish and ate and then curled up to
sleep in the cat house while I sat there with my mouth hanging open
wondering what the heck just happened. He basically said I live here now
and I'm the boss!

I tried to find him a home because I didn't think I wanted 3 cats, but I
couldn't find anyone who would take an older cat (vet estimated he was 11 or
12). I'm glad I couldn't.

I'm really going to miss him.

Outsider
January 15th 07, 02:05 PM
"Moongal" > wrote in
news:[email protected]:

> Thank you everyone. This just sucks.
>

Yes, it does.

It is like a bank loan. You get the $$ but some day you need to pay it
back. Our friends gives us so much joy but we owe them that last kindness
in the end and it is not easy and there is no easy answer as to how or
when. You just have to do your best and trust your "gut". No one will
judge you harsher than yourself. If you _are_ tempted to judge yourself
badly just imagine if you had not become a part of your cat's life.

be well,

Andy

blkcatgal
January 15th 07, 02:20 PM
We've all been down this road and, you're right, it isn't easy. I lost my
baby almost a year ago and it still hurts. But you have to remember you are
doing what is right for him. Just enjoy the time that you have with him now
and try not to dwell on what may be coming. Make him feel special.

Sue

"Moongal" > wrote in message
news:[email protected]
> Thank you everyone. This just sucks.
>
> He hasn't been deteriorating at all in the last few days, in fact he seems
> to be eating more, yet I've been getting this strong feeling that it's
> going to be soon.
>
> He's a special guy. He was a stray that picked me to live with. One day,
> years ago, he jumped into an open window, walked up to both my cats and
> gave them each a smack, went to their food dish and ate and then curled up
> to sleep in the cat house while I sat there with my mouth hanging open
> wondering what the heck just happened. He basically said I live here now
> and I'm the boss!
>
> I tried to find him a home because I didn't think I wanted 3 cats, but I
> couldn't find anyone who would take an older cat (vet estimated he was 11
> or 12). I'm glad I couldn't.
>
> I'm really going to miss him.
>

sheelagh
January 15th 07, 04:48 PM
>I'm really going to miss him.
> He's a special guy. He was a stray that picked me to live with. One day,
> years ago, he jumped into an open window, walked up to both my cats and
> gave them each a smack, went to their food dish and ate and then curled up
> to sleep in the cat house while I sat there with my mouth hanging open
> wondering what the heck just happened. He basically said I live here now
> and I'm the boss!

I can relate to this so much.Almost identical thing happened to our
Jasper @ the end of last year. I know that dread pit feeling & share
your sorrow with you;we all do!
As you said,"He chose you", & that was for a reason.
You have served him well and he know's it as well as you do.
Try not to feel guilty, It's such a futile emotion, believe me....
You will recover, & so will your Furry Friends too.Time is a magic
healer.I don't care what anyone say's, It is very true...

It's so hard to say good bye- It help's,& It's nice to get the chance
to believe me, & that is a big deal.
He wont be angry with you.Quite the opposite in fact.Try & share the
good time's whilst you can, with lots of lap time and snuggle's.
Sending lots of soothing purr's In your time of need....
S.

T
January 15th 07, 08:09 PM
In article <[email protected]>,
says...
> I'm going to have to make that decision at some point. I feel that it's
> going to be sooner than later. My 18 year old cat has CRF. He's lost so
> much weight. He's basically just a skeleton.
>
> He doesn't seem to be in any pain yet. He still likes lots of love and he
> purrs. He no longer kneads though. I don't think he has the strength. I
> no it's not time yet, but when it is time will I know? I don't to do it too
> late, or too soon. If he still enjoys being alive I want him around, but at
> the same time, if he's suffering I don't want to do it too late.
>
> For those that have had to have a pet euthanized how did you know it was the
> right time?

It's the quality of life for the cat that ultimately makes the decision
for me. When they stop enjoying things and treatment makes no
difference, it's time.

Moongal
January 16th 07, 11:20 AM
You guys are awesome. Just hearing from people who have gone through this
before helps so much.

It's weird. You know how I said he doesn't knead anymore? Well last night
he jumped in my lap and kneaded me for a really long time, then he slept a
little, then sat up and kneaded some more. It was really sweet of him. He
hasn't done that for a couple of months.

Lynne
January 16th 07, 01:16 PM
on Tue, 16 Jan 2007 11:20:59 GMT, "Moongal" >
wrote:

> It's weird. You know how I said he doesn't knead anymore? Well last
> night he jumped in my lap and kneaded me for a really long time, then
> he slept a little, then sat up and kneaded some more. It was really
> sweet of him. He hasn't done that for a couple of months.

It's moments like those that really pinch your heart. Just reading your
posts, I can sense your deep love for this kitty. He knows, too. You will
do the right thing at the right time.

--
Lynne

Smartin
January 17th 07, 01:43 AM
Moongal wrote:
> You guys are awesome. Just hearing from people who have gone through this
> before helps so much.
>
> It's weird. You know how I said he doesn't knead anymore? Well last night
> he jumped in my lap and kneaded me for a really long time, then he slept a
> little, then sat up and kneaded some more. It was really sweet of him. He
> hasn't done that for a couple of months.
>
>

Moongal,

My deepest sympathies. Almost everyone I have known has told me, your
friend will let you know when it is time. It sounds like your friend
wants to stick around for awhile longer. Enjoy him, let him enjoy you.
You will know for sure when the time has come.

--
Smartin

Patty
January 17th 07, 10:08 PM
On Mon, 15 Jan 2007 00:19:32 GMT, Moongal wrote:

> I'm going to have to make that decision at some point. I feel that it's
> going to be sooner than later. My 18 year old cat has CRF. He's lost so
> much weight. He's basically just a skeleton.
>
> He doesn't seem to be in any pain yet. He still likes lots of love and he
> purrs. He no longer kneads though. I don't think he has the strength. I
> no it's not time yet, but when it is time will I know? I don't to do it too
> late, or too soon. If he still enjoys being alive I want him around, but at
> the same time, if he's suffering I don't want to do it too late.
>
> For those that have had to have a pet euthanized how did you know it was the
> right time?

I've read all these posts with interest. You see, I'm facing this same
decision with my Grady. He's continuously losing weight, no real
diagnosis, all tests have come out "inconclusive", but yet I watch him
deteriorate on a daily basis. Grady is 16 and I know his life cycle is
nearing its end. It's breaking my heart, but I know I have to do what is
best for him.

I know that all of us who have very loved pets have to face this at some
point. My heart goes out to Moongal and everyone who has lost a very dear
companion.

Lynne
January 17th 07, 10:52 PM
on Wed, 17 Jan 2007 22:08:41 GMT, Patty > wrote:

> I'm facing this same
> decision with my Grady. He's continuously losing weight, no real
> diagnosis, all tests have come out "inconclusive", but yet I watch him
> deteriorate on a daily basis. Grady is 16 and I know his life cycle is
> nearing its end. It's breaking my heart, but I know I have to do what is
> best for him.

I'm so sorry, Patty.

I have my second pair of cats. They are young (ages 6 months and 3 years).
When I read these posts and remember how hard it was to say goodbye to my
other 2, I just want to hold them close and never let go. Of course they'd
eventually maul me for that. ;-)

--
Lynne

Patty
January 18th 07, 04:29 AM
On Wed, 17 Jan 2007 16:52:22 -0600, Lynne wrote:

> on Wed, 17 Jan 2007 22:08:41 GMT, Patty > wrote:
>
>> I'm facing this same
>> decision with my Grady. He's continuously losing weight, no real
>> diagnosis, all tests have come out "inconclusive", but yet I watch him
>> deteriorate on a daily basis. Grady is 16 and I know his life cycle is
>> nearing its end. It's breaking my heart, but I know I have to do what is
>> best for him.
>
> I'm so sorry, Patty.
>
> I have my second pair of cats. They are young (ages 6 months and 3 years).
> When I read these posts and remember how hard it was to say goodbye to my
> other 2, I just want to hold them close and never let go. Of course they'd
> eventually maul me for that. ;-)

Thanks, Lynn. I have one other, Rusty,who is the same age as Grady and
seems to be very healthy right now. It's funny how you can have two the
same age, who are very different from each other.

Patty