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blkcatgal
March 8th 08, 05:54 PM
I posted before that I took a stray cat in about a week ago (she has lived
all of her life previously outside). Right now, we are keeping her in our
finished basement in a cage that is 3'x6'x4'. Today we have let her out of
the cage and given her free-reign of the basement (we'll keep her in the
cage when we are sleeping or not at home). She is doing well except that
she is such a "fraidy-cat." She still doesn't totally trust me and will
hide from me. However, she loves my husband. We think she trusts him so
much because when she was outside, he was the one that fed her, talked to
her, etc. In order to get her to trust me more, we have made me her sole
caretaker...I am the one that feeds her, cleans her box, etc. This seems to
be helping, she let's me pet her (somewhat reluctantly) but she still seems
afraid of me (even though she will crawl all over my husband). We want to
begin the introduction process with our other 2 cats but only when she is
more comfortable with me. If she is such a fraidy cat, I don't know how she
will react to the other cats.

Anyone have any suggestions to help make her more trusting or is this just
the way she is going to be?

TIA.

Sue
--
**Visit me and my cats at http://www.island-cats.com/ **
---

Gail[_2_]
March 8th 08, 05:57 PM
Make sure you are the one that feeds her and speaks softly to her. Get one
of those feathers on a wand and play with her (interactive play). In time
she will grow to trust you. It will take time and patience. Hooray to you
both to take her into your home.
Gail
"blkcatgal" > wrote in message
...
>I posted before that I took a stray cat in about a week ago (she has lived
>all of her life previously outside). Right now, we are keeping her in our
>finished basement in a cage that is 3'x6'x4'. Today we have let her out of
>the cage and given her free-reign of the basement (we'll keep her in the
>cage when we are sleeping or not at home). She is doing well except that
>she is such a "fraidy-cat." She still doesn't totally trust me and will
>hide from me. However, she loves my husband. We think she trusts him so
>much because when she was outside, he was the one that fed her, talked to
>her, etc. In order to get her to trust me more, we have made me her sole
>caretaker...I am the one that feeds her, cleans her box, etc. This seems
>to be helping, she let's me pet her (somewhat reluctantly) but she still
>seems afraid of me (even though she will crawl all over my husband). We
>want to begin the introduction process with our other 2 cats but only when
>she is more comfortable with me. If she is such a fraidy cat, I don't know
>how she will react to the other cats.
>
> Anyone have any suggestions to help make her more trusting or is this just
> the way she is going to be?
>
> TIA.
>
> Sue
> --
> **Visit me and my cats at http://www.island-cats.com/ **
> ---
>
>

mc
March 8th 08, 09:19 PM
Sue it is so wonderful that you have taken this kitty in. Sounds like
you are doing everything right. It will not take as long as it seems
though. Your kitty just needs time.

Usually, I have found if you pet them while they are eating, they will
warm up pretty quickly to you. That usually works pretty well for me.
They seem to feel safer with you after you have petted them during
feeding time.

And, like Gail said, interactive toys are great.

One of our most beloved cats was a stray we took in and we watched her
warm up to us over the course of years, even though she was never
really wild. She was always friendly, but as the years went by she
just blossomed.

As much as we seem to think we understand how cats behave, the
introductions to your current kitty household members doesn't need to
be put off. I think what Phil suggested, using the socks prior to
intros was excellent. That was some really good advice he wrote in
that thread. Get them used to one anothers scents... Of course, your
current kitty household members already know about the other cat, and
she knows about them.

You will find that cats respond differently to other cats than they do
to we people, so please do not be put off by her frightfulness towards
you. That may not be the best indicator as to how she responds to your
other kitties. She is probably quite accustomed to other cats, just
not people.

So with that said... I wish you much luck! You are doing a really good
thing here ;-)

blkcatgal
March 8th 08, 10:48 PM
Thanks, mc and Gail, for your comments. I do have some concern since this
kitty (BTW, we named her Zoey), was on her own probably most of her life,
hiding and fending for herself. So I wonder if she will ever totally come
around.

I have tried the feather wand toy but she hasn't responded much to it. She
just doesn't want to play with me it seems. But I'll keep trying. It's
amazing how she reacts to my husband. She lights up when she sees him and
hears his voice. And she will crawl all over him and purr.

As far as whether my other cats and this one are aware of each other, I
don't think so. I have kept them totally separate. My other 2 know that
something is going on down the basement, but they don't know what. And Zoey
has heard the other 2 meowing at the basement door, but I'm not sure she
knows what it is. I'm going to start the sock thing and get them use to one
another's smells. That is a great idea.

I'm not giving up...just feeling a little frustrated. And realizing this is
probably going to take longer than I had hoped.

S.
--
**Visit me and my cats at http://www.island-cats.com/ **
---
"mc" > wrote in message
...
> Sue it is so wonderful that you have taken this kitty in. Sounds like
> you are doing everything right. It will not take as long as it seems
> though. Your kitty just needs time.
>
> Usually, I have found if you pet them while they are eating, they will
> warm up pretty quickly to you. That usually works pretty well for me.
> They seem to feel safer with you after you have petted them during
> feeding time.
>
> And, like Gail said, interactive toys are great.
>
> One of our most beloved cats was a stray we took in and we watched her
> warm up to us over the course of years, even though she was never
> really wild. She was always friendly, but as the years went by she
> just blossomed.
>
> As much as we seem to think we understand how cats behave, the
> introductions to your current kitty household members doesn't need to
> be put off. I think what Phil suggested, using the socks prior to
> intros was excellent. That was some really good advice he wrote in
> that thread. Get them used to one anothers scents... Of course, your
> current kitty household members already know about the other cat, and
> she knows about them.
>
> You will find that cats respond differently to other cats than they do
> to we people, so please do not be put off by her frightfulness towards
> you. That may not be the best indicator as to how she responds to your
> other kitties. She is probably quite accustomed to other cats, just
> not people.
>
> So with that said... I wish you much luck! You are doing a really good
> thing here ;-)
>
>
>

mc
March 8th 08, 11:05 PM
Hi Sue,

I think your feelings are completely understandable. Pet her a lot,
too, while you she is eating... that usually works quite well... She
will associate the petting to something positive.

She will come around. I tend to feel that cats that have been on their
own for most of their lives make the best pets. They just always seem
so grateful that they were taken in. I know that sounds like a bit of
a stretch but it is true. They seem to know how much better they have
it once they have acclimated to being inside.

The whole thing about being in a house is new to her, too. So these
are big adjustments for her, and she is meeting a new person during
this change.

How is she doing being in the house? Does she act like she wants to go
outside? I remember with our cat Tramp - she spent at least the first
two weeks wondering about her home outside, and then after that time
frame she never once acted as though she wanted to have anything to do
with that life again (meaning she never tried to go outside). It was
funny because my husband and I were sure she was going to somehow find
a way out of the house, even if it meant jumping through a glass
window. We were chuckling about that concern - I don't think we really
thought she would break a glass window trying to get out - but she
might have tried if she knew how.

But she was the best cat we ever had. It was so much fun to watch her
come out of her shell over the years.

I know, too, that all of your cats are very lucky to have you :-) Zoey
is the luckiest of all ;-)

Melissa

blkcatgal
March 8th 08, 11:20 PM
Thanks for the encouragement, Melissa. Zoey doesn't seem to mind being in
the house. I was worried about that too, when we first caught her. But she
isn't interested in trying to get out. I wasn't sure about keeping her in a
cage, but she doesn't mind that either. Right now, she's in her kitty condo
in the cage we are keeping her in and the door to the cage is wide
open...and she doesn't seem a bit interested in coming out.

What is funny is that my one cat, who I have had since he was 6 weeks old
and has never lived a day outside in his life....all he wants to do is get
outside. Go figure...:-)

S.
--
**Visit me and my cats at http://www.island-cats.com/ **
---

"mc" > wrote in message
...
> Hi Sue,
>
> I think your feelings are completely understandable. Pet her a lot,
> too, while you she is eating... that usually works quite well... She
> will associate the petting to something positive.
>
> She will come around. I tend to feel that cats that have been on their
> own for most of their lives make the best pets. They just always seem
> so grateful that they were taken in. I know that sounds like a bit of
> a stretch but it is true. They seem to know how much better they have
> it once they have acclimated to being inside.
>
> The whole thing about being in a house is new to her, too. So these
> are big adjustments for her, and she is meeting a new person during
> this change.
>
> How is she doing being in the house? Does she act like she wants to go
> outside? I remember with our cat Tramp - she spent at least the first
> two weeks wondering about her home outside, and then after that time
> frame she never once acted as though she wanted to have anything to do
> with that life again (meaning she never tried to go outside). It was
> funny because my husband and I were sure she was going to somehow find
> a way out of the house, even if it meant jumping through a glass
> window. We were chuckling about that concern - I don't think we really
> thought she would break a glass window trying to get out - but she
> might have tried if she knew how.
>
> But she was the best cat we ever had. It was so much fun to watch her
> come out of her shell over the years.
>
> I know, too, that all of your cats are very lucky to have you :-) Zoey
> is the luckiest of all ;-)
>
> Melissa
>

Gail[_2_]
March 9th 08, 12:07 AM
She acts that way with your husband because he fed her when she was outside
so she "knows" him. She will love you in time, also.
Gail
"blkcatgal" > wrote in message
. ..
> Thanks, mc and Gail, for your comments. I do have some concern since this
> kitty (BTW, we named her Zoey), was on her own probably most of her life,
> hiding and fending for herself. So I wonder if she will ever totally come
> around.
>
> I have tried the feather wand toy but she hasn't responded much to it.
> She just doesn't want to play with me it seems. But I'll keep trying.
> It's amazing how she reacts to my husband. She lights up when she sees
> him and hears his voice. And she will crawl all over him and purr.
>
> As far as whether my other cats and this one are aware of each other, I
> don't think so. I have kept them totally separate. My other 2 know that
> something is going on down the basement, but they don't know what. And
> Zoey has heard the other 2 meowing at the basement door, but I'm not sure
> she knows what it is. I'm going to start the sock thing and get them use
> to one another's smells. That is a great idea.
>
> I'm not giving up...just feeling a little frustrated. And realizing this
> is probably going to take longer than I had hoped.
>
> S.
> --
> **Visit me and my cats at http://www.island-cats.com/ **
> ---
> "mc" > wrote in message
> ...
>> Sue it is so wonderful that you have taken this kitty in. Sounds like
>> you are doing everything right. It will not take as long as it seems
>> though. Your kitty just needs time.
>>
>> Usually, I have found if you pet them while they are eating, they will
>> warm up pretty quickly to you. That usually works pretty well for me.
>> They seem to feel safer with you after you have petted them during
>> feeding time.
>>
>> And, like Gail said, interactive toys are great.
>>
>> One of our most beloved cats was a stray we took in and we watched her
>> warm up to us over the course of years, even though she was never
>> really wild. She was always friendly, but as the years went by she
>> just blossomed.
>>
>> As much as we seem to think we understand how cats behave, the
>> introductions to your current kitty household members doesn't need to
>> be put off. I think what Phil suggested, using the socks prior to
>> intros was excellent. That was some really good advice he wrote in
>> that thread. Get them used to one anothers scents... Of course, your
>> current kitty household members already know about the other cat, and
>> she knows about them.
>>
>> You will find that cats respond differently to other cats than they do
>> to we people, so please do not be put off by her frightfulness towards
>> you. That may not be the best indicator as to how she responds to your
>> other kitties. She is probably quite accustomed to other cats, just
>> not people.
>>
>> So with that said... I wish you much luck! You are doing a really good
>> thing here ;-)
>>
>>
>>
>
>

honeybunch
March 9th 08, 11:59 PM
On Mar 8, 7:07 pm, "Gail" > wrote:
> She acts that way with your husband because he fed her when she was outside
> so she "knows" him. She will love you in time, also.
> Gail"blkcatgal" > wrote in message
>
> . ..
>
> > Thanks, mc and Gail, for your comments. I do have some concern since this
> > kitty (BTW, we named her Zoey), was on her own probably most of her life,
> > hiding and fending for herself. So I wonder if she will ever totally come
> > around.
>
> > I have tried the feather wand toy but she hasn't responded much to it.
> > She just doesn't want to play with me it seems. But I'll keep trying.
> > It's amazing how she reacts to my husband. She lights up when she sees
> > him and hears his voice. And she will crawl all over him and purr.
>
> > As far as whether my other cats and this one are aware of each other, I
> > don't think so. I have kept them totally separate. My other 2 know that
> > something is going on down the basement, but they don't know what. And
> > Zoey has heard the other 2 meowing at the basement door, but I'm not sure
> > she knows what it is. I'm going to start the sock thing and get them use
> > to one another's smells. That is a great idea.
>
> > I'm not giving up...just feeling a little frustrated. And realizing this
> > is probably going to take longer than I had hoped.
>
> > S.
> > --
> > **Visit me and my cats athttp://www.island-cats.com/**
> > ---
> > "mc" > wrote in message
> ...
> >> Sue it is so wonderful that you have taken this kitty in. Sounds like
> >> you are doing everything right. It will not take as long as it seems
> >> though. Your kitty just needs time.
>
> >> Usually, I have found if you pet them while they are eating, they will
> >> warm up pretty quickly to you. That usually works pretty well for me.
> >> They seem to feel safer with you after you have petted them during
> >> feeding time.
>
> >> And, like Gail said, interactive toys are great.
>
> >> One of our most beloved cats was a stray we took in and we watched her
> >> warm up to us over the course of years, even though she was never
> >> really wild. She was always friendly, but as the years went by she
> >> just blossomed.
>
> >> As much as we seem to think we understand how cats behave, the
> >> introductions to your current kitty household members doesn't need to
> >> be put off. I think what Phil suggested, using the socks prior to
> >> intros was excellent. That was some really good advice he wrote in
> >> that thread. Get them used to one anothers scents... Of course, your
> >> current kitty household members already know about the other cat, and
> >> she knows about them.
>
> >> You will find that cats respond differently to other cats than they do
> >> to we people, so please do not be put off by her frightfulness towards
> >> you. That may not be the best indicator as to how she responds to your
> >> other kitties. She is probably quite accustomed to other cats, just
> >> not people.
>
> >> So with that said... I wish you much luck! You are doing a really good
> >> thing here ;-)

Now Sue, don't be jealous of Zooey's affection for your DH. The
fact that she loves him so is a good thing and she surely will come
around to you in her own sweet time and you are a sweetheart for
taking her in out of the cold. My boy doesn't really care for the
feather on a string either. What he really goes after is the laser
pointer light and he has some little crocheted balls that will catch
when he wants to play. Have you tried scratching Zooey in the collar
area of her neck like under her chin and on the sides?

blkcatgal
March 10th 08, 02:40 AM
Actually, the affection she shows my DH is quite endearing. He's a little
embarrassed because she likes him so much.

She likes the Cat Dancer toy. I've been playing with her with that. And
she loves the little furry mouse. She tosses it in the air and chases it (I
wonder how many real furry mouses she has had in her life!). I have
scratched her behind the ears and under her neck. She seems to like it but
she still is skittish around me. I know that it will just take some time.

Thanks for your comments.

S.
--
**Visit me and my cats at http://www.island-cats.com/ **
---
"honeybunch" > wrote in message
...
> On Mar 8, 7:07 pm, "Gail" > wrote:
>> She acts that way with your husband because he fed her when she was
>> outside
>> so she "knows" him. She will love you in time, also.
>> Gail"blkcatgal" > wrote in message
>>
>> . ..
>>
>> > Thanks, mc and Gail, for your comments. I do have some concern since
>> > this
>> > kitty (BTW, we named her Zoey), was on her own probably most of her
>> > life,
>> > hiding and fending for herself. So I wonder if she will ever totally
>> > come
>> > around.
>>
>> > I have tried the feather wand toy but she hasn't responded much to it.
>> > She just doesn't want to play with me it seems. But I'll keep trying.
>> > It's amazing how she reacts to my husband. She lights up when she sees
>> > him and hears his voice. And she will crawl all over him and purr.
>>
>> > As far as whether my other cats and this one are aware of each other, I
>> > don't think so. I have kept them totally separate. My other 2 know
>> > that
>> > something is going on down the basement, but they don't know what. And
>> > Zoey has heard the other 2 meowing at the basement door, but I'm not
>> > sure
>> > she knows what it is. I'm going to start the sock thing and get them
>> > use
>> > to one another's smells. That is a great idea.
>>
>> > I'm not giving up...just feeling a little frustrated. And realizing
>> > this
>> > is probably going to take longer than I had hoped.
>>
>> > S.
>> > --
>> > **Visit me and my cats athttp://www.island-cats.com/**
>> > ---
>> > "mc" > wrote in message
>> ...
>> >> Sue it is so wonderful that you have taken this kitty in. Sounds like
>> >> you are doing everything right. It will not take as long as it seems
>> >> though. Your kitty just needs time.
>>
>> >> Usually, I have found if you pet them while they are eating, they will
>> >> warm up pretty quickly to you. That usually works pretty well for me.
>> >> They seem to feel safer with you after you have petted them during
>> >> feeding time.
>>
>> >> And, like Gail said, interactive toys are great.
>>
>> >> One of our most beloved cats was a stray we took in and we watched her
>> >> warm up to us over the course of years, even though she was never
>> >> really wild. She was always friendly, but as the years went by she
>> >> just blossomed.
>>
>> >> As much as we seem to think we understand how cats behave, the
>> >> introductions to your current kitty household members doesn't need to
>> >> be put off. I think what Phil suggested, using the socks prior to
>> >> intros was excellent. That was some really good advice he wrote in
>> >> that thread. Get them used to one anothers scents... Of course, your
>> >> current kitty household members already know about the other cat, and
>> >> she knows about them.
>>
>> >> You will find that cats respond differently to other cats than they do
>> >> to we people, so please do not be put off by her frightfulness towards
>> >> you. That may not be the best indicator as to how she responds to your
>> >> other kitties. She is probably quite accustomed to other cats, just
>> >> not people.
>>
>> >> So with that said... I wish you much luck! You are doing a really good
>> >> thing here ;-)
>
> Now Sue, don't be jealous of Zooey's affection for your DH. The
> fact that she loves him so is a good thing and she surely will come
> around to you in her own sweet time and you are a sweetheart for
> taking her in out of the cold. My boy doesn't really care for the
> feather on a string either. What he really goes after is the laser
> pointer light and he has some little crocheted balls that will catch
> when he wants to play. Have you tried scratching Zooey in the collar
> area of her neck like under her chin and on the sides?

mc
March 10th 08, 05:10 AM
Sue,

I just have to chuckle about this... because I remember that our cat
Tramp (my husband named her that after Charlie Chaplain from the movie
"The Tramp" because she had a moustache like Charlie Chaplin did in
the movie) was insane about those soft "real fur like" mice.

I purchased a couple from the store one day to take home for her and
she had them shred up like a newspaper in less than a day or two...
she actually tried to chew up the "inards" so to speak...

I found the leftovers all over the carpet in our family room. Too
funny! I was quite surprised that she was so eager for that mouse...
this was a bit larger than the usual ones you find at the check out in
the pet store... this one was at least 5" - 6" or so long, but I will
never forget the look on her face when she saw it... She liked (or
wanted) THAT toy!

I know this note sounds absurd, but it really was something the way
she took to that particular toy. I think this was because she was used
to hunting real mice...

Sue, I know you are doing everything right. Zoey is soooo lucky to
have you! When she comes around she will be the best kitty you could
hope to have. I mean this from my heart. You will be amazed. Give her
a week or two more... She will be such a sweaty!

AAA+++ to you and your husband for being so kind to bring her in ;-)

Rene S.
March 10th 08, 06:48 PM
Awww, she sounds like a sweetie. From what I've read here, she's
making excellent progress with you. It's only been a short time since
you brought her inside, and her whole world has changed. Keep doing
what you're doing. You might try playing a radio softly when you're
not there. Good luck. It sounds like she has a great new home!