View Full Version : Alien Abductions / Anal Probing In The Gorilla Community?

April 4th 08, 05:08 PM
Alien Abductions / Anal Probing In The Gorilla Community?

HOWEDY Fellow Gorillas and Gorilla Lovers,

Permit me to introduce myself.

I'm The_800_Pound_Gorilla_In_The_Room <{}';~ ) >

I did *NOT* come here to ATTACK you.

CONtrary to pupular belief, Gorillas, are generally shy and
retiring; although I cannot speak for ALL Gorillas, we usually
prefer a veggie diet but some *(depending on their parenting)
will occasionally indulge in MEAT *(yuk!) and MOST of us
engage in frequent polygamous SEX **(Yummy~!).

I'll just gather some fresh soft leaves and make myself a nest
in the corner of your livin room here and you're welcome to
ignore me. I'll just keep quietly to myself <{}'; ~ ) >

Care for a bananna?

I just LOVE coconuts~! Don't you?

Hey?? Put two of them an WON of these banannas together
and you can PRETEND you're a Gorilla too! Hey lookey!
Squeeze this bananna an you get... hmm~!

The dilemma of alien abductions and anal probing is a
HUMAN foible brought on by their inability to HOWEtwit
the cunning of even the basest, most common, backwards
forms, of alien visitors <{}: ~ ( >

Any DECENT Gorilla would NEVER settle for THAT~!

Gorillas are taught by their parents from a very young
age to not allow aliens or even other Gorillas to probe
their anal orfices without consent and usually a nice
dinner and perhaps a glass or two of sherry.

When aliens or even other Gorillas attempt to anally probe
them, they're taught to PRAISE them in advance and subtly,
non physically, briefly, alternately distract and INSTANTLY
non physically praise them for five to fifteen seconds.

A couple repetitions of that and the anal oriented alien
or errant Gorilla is compromised, JUST LIKE FREAKIN
MAGICK <{}': ~ ) >

Alpha rolling, kneeing, shocking, jerking and choking on
collars and head harnesses is tantamount to anal rape.

Gorillas engaging in such despicable behaviors are BANISHED
from decent Gorilla society. Too bad humans don't have the
same high standards of unconditional love, trust and respect.

Here's The_800_Pound_Gorilla_In_The_Room's FREE training manual:
http://relinkz.com/The_800_Pound_Gorilla_In_The_Room's_Training_Manua l

In Love And Light,
I Remain Respectfully, Humbly Yours,
The_800_Pound_Gorilla_In_The_Room <{}'; ~ ) >