Help 5yr old cat submissive urination / defecation.
 

I trully do not know if anything can be done at this point. Figured
will throw it up there, see if someone had simmilar problem.

The cat is 5 years old and extremely submissive. Its afraid of
everything and anything and recently it started 'spilling outside'.
The cycle goes:
the cat gets scared
I pet the cat, - she likes it
I pick up the cat, put it on my lap and continue petting, sometimes
she purrs in respones
all of a sudden i feel the warm stuff all over my leg.... lift up the
cat, and there she is peeing right on me. I begin to get ticked off.
Throw the cat on the couch and proceed to clean up. Come back to move
the cat from the spot where it lended all of a sudden it starts taking
a dump right there. The alternative, it gets in the middle of the
floor and as I approach it starts... well you got the picture.

This happened on more then one occasion..

Has anyone seen anything like it?

"Arthur Mnev" wrote [a bunch of stuff about a
"submissive" cat.

Arthur. History, please. Where was she born, how long have you had her, etc.
etc. etc.

"Arthur Mnev" wrote [a bunch of stuff about a
"submissive" cat.

Arthur. History, please. Where was she born, how long have you had her, etc.
etc. etc.

On 5 Jun 2004 22:35:30 -0700, (Arthur Mnev)
wrote:

I trully do not know if anything can be done at this point. Figured
will throw it up there, see if someone had simmilar problem.

The cat is 5 years old and extremely submissive. Its afraid of
everything and anything and recently it started 'spilling outside'.
The cycle goes:
the cat gets scared
I pet the cat, - she likes it
I pick up the cat, put it on my lap and continue petting, sometimes
she purrs in respones
all of a sudden i feel the warm stuff all over my leg.... lift up the
cat, and there she is peeing right on me. I begin to get ticked off.
Throw the cat on the couch and proceed to clean up. Come back to move
the cat from the spot where it lended all of a sudden it starts taking
a dump right there. The alternative, it gets in the middle of the
floor and as I approach it starts... well you got the picture.

This happened on more then one occasion..

Has anyone seen anything like it?
It sounds like an abused kitty. She is frightened and has no way to
protect itself. What is her history? Was she abused before you got
her or is it more recent?

On 5 Jun 2004 22:35:30 -0700, (Arthur Mnev)
wrote:

I trully do not know if anything can be done at this point. Figured
will throw it up there, see if someone had simmilar problem.

The cat is 5 years old and extremely submissive. Its afraid of
everything and anything and recently it started 'spilling outside'.
The cycle goes:
the cat gets scared
I pet the cat, - she likes it
I pick up the cat, put it on my lap and continue petting, sometimes
she purrs in respones
all of a sudden i feel the warm stuff all over my leg.... lift up the
cat, and there she is peeing right on me. I begin to get ticked off.
Throw the cat on the couch and proceed to clean up. Come back to move
the cat from the spot where it lended all of a sudden it starts taking
a dump right there. The alternative, it gets in the middle of the
floor and as I approach it starts... well you got the picture.

This happened on more then one occasion..

Has anyone seen anything like it?
It sounds like an abused kitty. She is frightened and has no way to
protect itself. What is her history? Was she abused before you got
her or is it more recent?

In article ,
enlightened us with...
I trully do not know if anything can be done at this point. Figured
will throw it up there, see if someone had simmilar problem.

The cat is 5 years old and extremely submissive. Its afraid of
everything and anything and recently it started 'spilling outside'.
The cycle goes:
the cat gets scared
I pet the cat, - she likes it
I pick up the cat, put it on my lap and continue petting, sometimes
she purrs in respones
all of a sudden i feel the warm stuff all over my leg.... lift up the
cat, and there she is peeing right on me. I begin to get ticked off.
Throw the cat on the couch and proceed to clean up. Come back to move
the cat from the spot where it lended all of a sudden it starts taking
a dump right there. The alternative, it gets in the middle of the
floor and as I approach it starts... well you got the picture.

This happened on more then one occasion..

Has anyone seen anything like it?


Yes - in abused animals.

The cycle, as the cat sees it...

I get scared. I want to be comforted. A human comes over to me and picks
me up. I rather like it.
I'm still scared and I lose a little control. The human gets angry,
scaring me more (reminding me of past hurts?). I lose more control. The
human is very angry. I can tell by his body language, smell, and tone of
voice. I don't know what to do. I lose bowel control.
The next time I get scared, I feel this desire for comfort, but I know
that after the petting, the human gets angry. I don't know whether to
approach or not. In my confusion and anticipation, I lose control in the
middle of the floor. The human gets angry...

You need to break the cycle. Read her body language. You can tell if she
is scared enough to lose control if you pay attention. DO NOT GET ANGRY.
It makes it WAY worse.
*Before* she loses control, leave.
Approach her. Get as close as possible, but not so close that she loses
it. Make nice. Coo and talk in a high pitched, friendly voice. Toss some
treats if she likes them. Do not make too much eye contact as it is
threatening. Do not lean over her - bend down in front of her and hold
your hand out and let her come to you. If she looks like she's going to
lose it, leave the room immediately (NOT angrily). If she doesn't, let
her rub you a couple times and leave anyway with a smile and a kind
word.
If you do manage to pick her up without her losing it, put her down
immediately. Before she has a chance to pee. Leave the room with a smile
and a good word. She will learn that being held doesn't lead to your
anger in time and you'll be able to hold her for longer periods.

If you miss and she loses it, calmly and gently (not angrily; kindly)
put her in another room and go back and clean up. She can't help it.
Your anger won't help. You'll be a bit peeved when you're cleaning, so
put her somewhere she won't be exposed to that side of you. She needs to
trust you, not fear you. She needs to trust that you will love her and
never hurt her.

Remember - it's not her fault. Don't blame her or get angry with her for
something she can't help. She needs more confidence, not anger and
blame. Think of her as a child - you wouldn't punish a frightened child
for losing control, would you? (If you would, please rehome the cat and
any other living beings you are currently caring for.)

Lastly, patience, patience, patience. The patience of a god. Really. If
you can't do that some days (hard day at work, stress, whatever), don't
interact with her at all that day. Better to leave her alone completely
than to keep going in that cycle. If you think you will never have the
patience, please consider rehoming her to someone who does.


--
--
~kaeli~
Humpty Dumpty was pushed!
http://www.ipwebdesign.net/wildAtHeart
http://www.ipwebdesign.net/kaelisSpace

In article ,
enlightened us with...
I trully do not know if anything can be done at this point. Figured
will throw it up there, see if someone had simmilar problem.

The cat is 5 years old and extremely submissive. Its afraid of
everything and anything and recently it started 'spilling outside'.
The cycle goes:
the cat gets scared
I pet the cat, - she likes it
I pick up the cat, put it on my lap and continue petting, sometimes
she purrs in respones
all of a sudden i feel the warm stuff all over my leg.... lift up the
cat, and there she is peeing right on me. I begin to get ticked off.
Throw the cat on the couch and proceed to clean up. Come back to move
the cat from the spot where it lended all of a sudden it starts taking
a dump right there. The alternative, it gets in the middle of the
floor and as I approach it starts... well you got the picture.

This happened on more then one occasion..

Has anyone seen anything like it?


Yes - in abused animals.

The cycle, as the cat sees it...

I get scared. I want to be comforted. A human comes over to me and picks
me up. I rather like it.
I'm still scared and I lose a little control. The human gets angry,
scaring me more (reminding me of past hurts?). I lose more control. The
human is very angry. I can tell by his body language, smell, and tone of
voice. I don't know what to do. I lose bowel control.
The next time I get scared, I feel this desire for comfort, but I know
that after the petting, the human gets angry. I don't know whether to
approach or not. In my confusion and anticipation, I lose control in the
middle of the floor. The human gets angry...

You need to break the cycle. Read her body language. You can tell if she
is scared enough to lose control if you pay attention. DO NOT GET ANGRY.
It makes it WAY worse.
*Before* she loses control, leave.
Approach her. Get as close as possible, but not so close that she loses
it. Make nice. Coo and talk in a high pitched, friendly voice. Toss some
treats if she likes them. Do not make too much eye contact as it is
threatening. Do not lean over her - bend down in front of her and hold
your hand out and let her come to you. If she looks like she's going to
lose it, leave the room immediately (NOT angrily). If she doesn't, let
her rub you a couple times and leave anyway with a smile and a kind
word.
If you do manage to pick her up without her losing it, put her down
immediately. Before she has a chance to pee. Leave the room with a smile
and a good word. She will learn that being held doesn't lead to your
anger in time and you'll be able to hold her for longer periods.

If you miss and she loses it, calmly and gently (not angrily; kindly)
put her in another room and go back and clean up. She can't help it.
Your anger won't help. You'll be a bit peeved when you're cleaning, so
put her somewhere she won't be exposed to that side of you. She needs to
trust you, not fear you. She needs to trust that you will love her and
never hurt her.

Remember - it's not her fault. Don't blame her or get angry with her for
something she can't help. She needs more confidence, not anger and
blame. Think of her as a child - you wouldn't punish a frightened child
for losing control, would you? (If you would, please rehome the cat and
any other living beings you are currently caring for.)

Lastly, patience, patience, patience. The patience of a god. Really. If
you can't do that some days (hard day at work, stress, whatever), don't
interact with her at all that day. Better to leave her alone completely
than to keep going in that cycle. If you think you will never have the
patience, please consider rehoming her to someone who does.


--
--
~kaeli~
Humpty Dumpty was pushed!
http://www.ipwebdesign.net/wildAtHeart
http://www.ipwebdesign.net/kaelisSpace

"kaeli" wrote in message
...
The cycle, as the cat sees it...
(regretfully snipped)
Lastly, patience, patience, patience. The patience of a god. Really. If
you can't do that some days (hard day at work, stress, whatever), don't
interact with her at all that day. Better to leave her alone completely
than to keep going in that cycle. If you think you will never have the
patience, please consider rehoming her to someone who does.
~kaeli~
Keli,
Sorry I had to snip, or my newsreader would not send. This is really great
advice. I believe the cat has a medical condition and/or has been seriously
abused, either during or previous to her present home. She needs constant
kindness and understanding. I hope the O.P. follows your advice.
Annie

"kaeli" wrote in message
...
The cycle, as the cat sees it...
(regretfully snipped)
Lastly, patience, patience, patience. The patience of a god. Really. If
you can't do that some days (hard day at work, stress, whatever), don't
interact with her at all that day. Better to leave her alone completely
than to keep going in that cycle. If you think you will never have the
patience, please consider rehoming her to someone who does.
~kaeli~
Keli,
Sorry I had to snip, or my newsreader would not send. This is really great
advice. I believe the cat has a medical condition and/or has been seriously
abused, either during or previous to her present home. She needs constant
kindness and understanding. I hope the O.P. follows your advice.
Annie

In article ,
enlightened us with...
Sorry I had to snip, or my newsreader would not send. This is really great
advice. I believe the cat has a medical condition and/or has been seriously
abused, either during or previous to her present home. She needs constant
kindness and understanding. I hope the O.P. follows your advice.
Annie


*slaps self on forehead*

I should have mentioned that possibility.
Add taking the cat to the vet to rule out physical problems to that list
of mine. :)

Thanks Annie.

--
--
~kaeli~
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
http://www.ipwebdesign.net/wildAtHeart
http://www.ipwebdesign.net/kaelisSpace