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Old September 22nd 04, 10:59 PM
Yoj
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ROTFLOL!

--
Joy

"You can never do a kindness too soon because you never know how soon it
will be too late." - Ralph Waldo Emerson


"CatNipped" wrote in message
...
Cast of Characters:

Sammy - 5 ½-month-old female kitten
Mommy - MUCH older female human
Daddy - EXTREMELY old male fart, um, human

Mommy and daddy set up the folding table in the garage in the hopes of
playing a rousing game of ping pong. Sammy hears the commotion and

comes
charging in through the cat flap to see what's going on. Daddy takes

the
plastic ball in one hand, the ping pong paddle in the other and serves

the
ball over the net to Mommy. Mommy takes a wild swing at the ball and
misses. The ball goes ricocheting off the garage wall with Sammy in

hot
pursuit of the ball and Mommy in hot pursuit of Sammy. Mommy pries

the wet
ball out of Sammy's jaws, wipes it off on her shorts, and hands it

back to
Daddy - sco Daddy 1, Mommy 0 - Daddy's serve.

Daddy takes the plastic ball in one hand, the ping pong paddle in the

other
and serves the ball over the net to Mommy. Mommy swings, hits the

ball too
hard, and sends the ball flying over Daddy's head to ricochet off the

garage
wall with Sammy in hot pursuit of the ball and Daddy in hot pursuit of
Sammy. Daddy pries the wet ball out of Sammy's jaws, wipes it off on

his
shorts, and prepares to serve the ball - sco Daddy 2, Mommy 0 -

Daddy's
serve.

Sammy is now getting the hang of the game. Daddy takes the plastic

ball in
one hand, the ping pong paddle in the other and serves the ball over

the net
to Mommy. Sammy jumps up to Mommy's side of the table and bats at the

ball
with her paw. Amazingly, the ball sails over the net and bounces once

on
Daddy's side of the table. Daddy is just watching in amazement and

lets the
ball fly off his end of the table to ricochet off the garage door.

Sammy
takes off in hot pursuit of the ball and Daddy takes off in hot

pursuit of
Sammy. Daddy pries the wet ball out of Sammy's jaws, wipes it off on

his
shorts, and tries to figure out whose serve it is - sco Daddy 2,

Sammy 0,
Mommy 0 - Sammy's serve.

Sammy knows it's her serve, so she jumps up on the table waiting to be
handed the ball. Mommy picks Sammy up and gently places her on the

garage
floor. Mommy argues that, since Sammy was sitting on her side of the

table,
it should be Mommy's serve. Daddy knows Mommy's skill level at ping

pong,
does not feel threatened by giving up the advantage, and hands Mommy

the
ball. Mommy takes the plastic ball in one hand, the ping pong paddle

in the
other, drops the plastic ball, and swings at it with the paddle.

Mommy
completely misses the ball which goes rolling off the side of the

table with
Sammy in hot pursuit of the ball and Mommy in hot pursuit of Sammy.

Mommy
pries the wet ball out of Sammy's jaws, wipes it off on her shorts,

and
hands the ball to Daddy - sco Daddy 2, Sammy 0, Mommy 0 - Daddy's

serve.

Daddy takes the plastic ball in one hand, the ping pong paddle in the

other
and serves the ball over the net to Mommy. Mommy finally manages to

hit the
ball over the net to make it bounce once on Daddy's side of the table.
Daddy, not expecting this amazing development, is in the middle of
scratching the back of his head with his paddle and misses the ball.

The
ball goes sailing off the end of the table with Sammy in hot pursuit

of the
ball and Daddy in hot pursuit of Sammy. Daddy pries the wet ball out

of
Sammy's jaws, wipes it off on his shorts, and hands the ball to

Mommy -
score Daddy 2, Sammy 0, Mommy 0 - Mommy's serve.

Mommy takes the plastic ball in one hand, the ping pong paddle in the

other,
drops the plastic ball, and swings at it with the paddle. Mommy

manages to
hit her own hand with the paddle while completely missing the ball

which
goes rolling off the side of the table with Sammy in hot pursuit of

the ball
and Mommy in hot pursuit of Sammy. Mommy pries the wet ball out of

Sammy's
jaws, wipes it off on her shorts, and hands the ball to Daddy - score

Daddy
2, Sammy 0, Mommy 0 - Daddy's serve.

Daddy takes the plastic ball in one hand, the ping pong paddle in the

other
and starts to serve the ball. Sammy, angry at being repeatedly denied

her
serve, makes a preemptive strike on Daddy's forearm. Daddy, whose

serving
arm is suddenly heavier by eight pounds, misses the ball but sends

Sammy
sliding into the net on the end of his swing. Eight pounds of kitten

cause
the lynch pins holding the net to come loose and the net wraps itself

around
Sammy. Sammy, startled by being attacked by a green snake, jumps off

the
table trailing the net behind her. Mommy runs in pursuit of Sammy,
disentangles her from the net, gently places Sammy on the garage

floor, then
sets the net back up on its lynch pins.

Daddy, bemused by the commotion, asks Mommy what the score is and

whose
serve it is. Mommy tells Daddy that the score is: Daddy 2, Sammy1,

Mommy 3
and that it is Mommy's serve. Daddy narrows his eyes and gives Mommy

"the
look", but doesn't argue the point - score Daddy 2, Sammy 1, Mommy 3 -

Mommy's
serve.

Mommy takes the plastic ball in one hand, the ping pong paddle in the

other,
drops the plastic ball, and swings at it with the paddle. Before

Mommy can
hit either the ball or her own hand, Sammy, angry at the green snake

that
attacked her, jumps onto the middle of the table seeking revenge. The
plastic ball bounces once on the table and then bounces off of Sammy's
hiney. Sammy, startled by the sudden touch on her hiney, levitates

three
feet off the table's surface convinced that she has been bitten by the

green
snake. The ball bounces once more, Mommy has the presence of mind to

hit
the ball with the paddle and send it over the net. Daddy, chortling

at
Sammy's antics, misses the ball which goes rolling off of his side of

the
table with Sammy in hot pursuit of the ball and Daddy in hot pursuit

of
Sammy. Daddy pries the wet ball out of Sammy's jaws, wipes it off on

his
shorts, and tries to figure out whose serve it is - sco Daddy 2,

Sammy 3,
Mommy 7 - Sammy's serve (according to Mommy, anyway).

Sammy knows it's her serve, so she jumps up on the table waiting to be
handed the ball. Mommy picks Sammy up and gently places her on the

garage
floor. Mommy argues that, since Sammy was sitting on her side of the

table,
it should be Mommy's serve. Daddy knows Mommy's skill level at ping

pong,
does not feel threatened by giving up the advantage, and hands Mommy

the
ball. Mommy takes the plastic ball in one hand, the ping pong paddle

in the
other, drops the plastic ball, and swings at it with the paddle.

Mommy
completely misses the ball which goes rolling off the side of the

table with
Sammy in hot pursuit of the ball and Mommy in hot pursuit of Sammy.

Sammy,
who is now really angry about being cheated in regards to her serve,

thrown
across the table, and attacked twice by a green snake, chomps down on

the
plastic ball crunching it into disservice. There is no other plastic

ball
available. Game, set, and point, the match goes to Sammy.

Mommy and Daddy head upstairs to get the Monopoly game out of the

closet.

Hugs,

CatNipped