TWEAKER

I saw a commercial once on TV -- digitally edited safari footage that
showed a tiny cat stalking and hunting a big game animal. It was an
ad for some kind of cat food I think, with a tag line to the effect
that the heart of a big cat beats in the chest of every armchair
kitty.

It reminds me of Tweaker, the 4-pound lion who stalks and attacks my
85-pound rottweiler/shepherd. He crouches down and glares at her
while she eyes him ruefully and backs slowly away. Then he launches
with a screeching yowl and bats furiously at her legs and flanks with
his balled-up fists until he has her against a wall, where she cowers
with her tail down until I rescue her by snatching up the cat.

Slowly but surely she is learning to play with him and give it back,
though. It's an unusual role-reversal -- the dog is quiet and
dignified, whereas the cat is obnoxious and out of control. He also
attacks my feet when I try to move around. But he never scratches,
not even slightly. He is a self-declawing cat.

The other thing he loves is the red matchbox-type radio-controlled car
that I got at Radio Shack for $15. He goes berzerk when I put it down
on the kitchen floor and start moving it around.

He is easily forgiven because he is so affectionate and tiny and has
so much character. He's a warm ball of fun.

BATHROOM CAT -- BEYOND FERAL?

The bathroom cat has thwarted my attempts at capture to the point
where I have backed off and am now using hunger (but not excessively)
as a taming force. This is one hostile, ferocious animal, and not a
small one either. I wonder if she is not a natural lynx hybrid. Take
another look at these pix:

www.geocities.com/wallofgrays/catcam.htm

And then look at this link:

http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/town/pl...90/canlynx.htm

I'm right up against the Canadian border, on the edge of the habitat,
but definitely on the inside edge, especially with the greenbelt that
runs along this stretch of border.

She is apparently not pregnant, but I think I have solved the mystery.
It turns out there is another cat who looks almost identical living on
or around my property. I trapped the wrong one.

Next week I go for the hard drugs if nothing else has worked by then.

Charlie