On 2005-06-26, wafflycat penned:

"Monique Y. Mudama" wrote in message
...

I swear this - they are one and the same woman - they speak in
indentical terms!

Is your mom German? =P

Count yourself lucky. Whilst in my mid-twenties, and *slim* I was
wearing a short dress. My mother told me not to wear it as... wait
for it... remember I'm in my twenties at the time... I was "no
spring chicken anymore."

Ugh!

Mom actually encouraged me to wear bandeaus and other small items when
I was a teen; things that *no one* in my age group wore. I thought I
was fat back then, but when I look at the pictures ... well, I wasn't.
My face from back then is so narrow, it looks like an entirely
different person.

I don't know how to make it so that comments like this don't hurt.

They do hurt. They *know* it hurts. Sadly. It's something some
mothers do. On the plus side, my mother having the tact & diplomacy
section of her brain being the size of a gnat's testicle, made me
acutely aware of just how damaging thoughtless remarks from a parent
to a child can be - as a result, she did me a favour, I really make
a concerted effort *not* to be like that with Nathan :-)

Yeah; I don't have kids, but I try to be very careful about what I
say when it comes to esteem-related issues.

I'm pondering a new strategy: I might tell my mom that from now on,
every time she makes a comment about how fat I am, I'm going to eat a
chocolate bar. Maybe that will finally make her think.

--
monique, who spoils Oscar unmercifully

pictures: http://www.bounceswoosh.org/rpca