PatM wrote:
Been there. Purrs for you and your family.
Is there absolutely no way to go see your grandma?

PatM

1. If I go, mom and dad have to leave her alone for 5 hours or more to
come get me at the airport.
2. I have no money--I'm going on a work trip to England in six days
and it's cleaned out my bank account completely. I'm eating out of
cans because I have no money to go out and buy fresh food. (When I get
back from England I'll have scholarship payment so I'll be ok then...)
3. Mom and Dad seem to not want me to come home.

I didn't go home in the ten days my other grandmother was dying either,
but she had 7 other grandkids and 4 sons...and I didn't go home for the
funeral. Again, no money and that sense from my family that I wasn't
needed/wanted.

but also, Grandma Cora always keeps telling me not to go to Ontario to
visit because she worries about me on the airplane. Knowing I am
flying has triggered depressions in her before, and at this point, it
might kill her...if I did try, I would have to not tell her until I
arrived, and I have no money and I am dependent on my parents to come
get me at the airport because buses dont' go to our remote area and...

I think it would be harder on Grandma now to put her at the center of a
war to try to make my parents help me come to see her. They are taking
care of her. I got to talk to her on the phone.

Gods, I don't know. This is the woman I love more than anyone else in
the world, and yet somehow it doesn't feel right to try to go home
(particularly if she dies on my way home or whatever...and my coming
just gives mom and dad more stress and takes them away from caring for
grandma.) I don't know what she would want me to do.

--Fil