OT turkey 911

HELP!!! We cook Tom tomorrow (Sunday morning.) Louie put the bird in the
fridge Thursday morning. He pushed and poked that chunk of protein and heard
the sound of ice crystals crunching. Any ideas on how to get him raw enough
to roast? Tomorrow morning is Zero Hour and i want that bird done! And
without the nasty stuff i heard certain airline employees got a couple days
ago courtesy of their employers!

Blessed be,
Baha

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Message posted via http://www.catkb.com

We have a big bucket we were planning on brining him with. Can we use this?
And what would we have to do to make it fit to use to brine afterward?

Matthew wrote:
HELP!!! We cook Tom tomorrow (Sunday morning.) Louie put the bird in the
fridge Thursday morning. He pushed and poked that chunk of protein and
[quoted text clipped - 8 lines]
Blessed be,
Baha

also lug a big clean bucket up to your bathtub. Drop your frozen bird in it
and fill to the brim with cold water. If he's a floater, weigh him down with
a brick or 2. Change the water every hour if possible.

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Baha via CatKB.com wrote:
HELP!!! We cook Tom tomorrow (Sunday morning.) Louie put the bird in
the fridge Thursday morning. He pushed and poked that chunk of
protein and heard the sound of ice crystals crunching. Any ideas on
how to get him raw enough to roast? Tomorrow morning is Zero Hour and
i want that bird done! And without the nasty stuff i heard certain
airline employees got a couple days ago courtesy of their employers!

Blessed be,
Baha

Dunk it in a sink full of cold water.

HELP!!! We cook Tom tomorrow (Sunday morning.) Louie put the bird in the
fridge Thursday morning. He pushed and poked that chunk of protein and
heard the sound of ice crystals crunching. Any ideas on how to get him
raw enough to roast? Tomorrow morning is Zero Hour and i want that bird
done!
there's a quicker-but more labor-intensive-alternative. Simply place the
bird in a big pot of cold water, allowing half an hour of soaking time per
pound (meaning a 25-pound turkey can thaw in half a day). You'll have to
replace the water every half hour, and also make sure that the turkey is in
a leak-proof package, because turkey meat can absorb moisture and become
watery.

An even quicker way would be to put it in that leakproof package
and then the whole family can take turns cuddling up to it inside
a sleeping bag. Replace family members frequently as they faint
or get frostbite. After all it's just got bad hypothermia.

(Sorry, I have a hard time not being frivolous about this - I just
don't celebrate anniversaries of any kind, and certainly not when
they involve weird culinary rituals you'd never dream of enacting
unless the calendar told you to).

============== j-c ====== @ ====== purr . demon . co . uk ==============
Jack Campin: 11 Third St, Newtongrange EH22 4PU, Scotland | tel 0131 660 4760
http://www.purr.demon.co.uk/jack/ for CD-ROMs and free | fax 0870 0554 975
stuff: Scottish music, food intolerance, & Mac logic fonts | mob 07800 739 557

Butterball staffs (yes, with people) a telephone hotline during the
holday turkey season for those last minute emergencies like Baha's.
They officially opened the lines this year on November 1, and they
don't cloase until the Friday after Christmas. It's also open
year-round on an automated basis.

The number is 1-800-BUTTERBALL (1-800-288-8372)

Hours and more information he

http://www.butterball.com/en/files/P...eFactSheet.pdf

Their website has all sorts of menus, recipes, tools, and cooking tips
too (there's even a "turkey newsletter" you can get)

http://www.butterball.com


Jeanne



On Sun, 25 Nov 2007 00:53:36 GMT, "Baha via CatKB.com" u18616@uwe
wrote:

HELP!!! We cook Tom tomorrow (Sunday morning.) Louie put the bird in the
fridge Thursday morning. He pushed and poked that chunk of protein and heard
the sound of ice crystals crunching. Any ideas on how to get him raw enough
to roast? Tomorrow morning is Zero Hour and i want that bird done! And
without the nasty stuff i heard certain airline employees got a couple days
ago courtesy of their employers!

Blessed be,
Baha

Jeanne Hedge

============
http://www.jhedge.com

Jack Campin - bogus address wrote:

An even quicker way would be to put it in that leakproof package
and then the whole family can take turns cuddling up to it inside
a sleeping bag. Replace family members frequently as they faint
or get frostbite. After all it's just got bad hypothermia.

All right, wise@$$...!

(Sorry, I have a hard time not being frivolous about this - I just
don't celebrate anniversaries of any kind, and certainly not when
they involve weird culinary rituals you'd never dream of enacting
unless the calendar told you to).

You make an excellent point. Yes, the calendar tells us to do these things.
And I'm imagining you dislike a certain hypocrisy about holidays about as
much as I do. You know what I mean: like why can't we be good to people the
whole year through, instead of concentrating it on the last few weeks of the
year in the name of Christmas-Holiday-Whatever Spirit. If I could get through
without setting foot inside a store until Spring comes, i would. the mall up
the road from me has this detestable "animatronic" thing called "The
Boulevard Bear Band" set up right in the nexus of Boulevard Mall, ostensibly
to play their hokey animatronic Christmas carols. Bullpucky. They exist to
tell you (between their robo-songs) to go to one of the anchor stores or
customer service to buy gift cards, or to announce hour-only specials at
Cheap Jewelry Depot or Kiosk of Schlock. And i hate this, and want to go buy
a gift card to use at Sears to buy a chainsaw in the Craftsman department so
I can go Boulevard Bear hunting.

But this is a small matter. I had friends without family and a turkey that
needed a home that wasn't my cramped little freezer space. It turned out good,
though deformedly ugly, and just wanted my buddies to feel a little better.

I will show them your post though. If it makes them laugh as much as I (and i
did!), I will have been a good Boy Scout and done my good deed.

Blessed be,
Baha

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