[OT] Need Opinions / Help

I promised myself I wouldn't come back to the group until I could stop
whining about my problems. OK, I'm not going to whine, I want to *DO*
something to change things.

The problem... I think I've become a perpetual "victim". This is the
second boss in a row who is being really abusive to me. It's like "fool me
once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me". I need to figure out how to
get back my self respect as well as get respect from the people around me (I
had it once, so I know it's possible).

Just because I couldn't pass the MCAD/MCSD certification exams (even though
I do all the work assigned to me 3 times faster than any other employee), my
boss kept pressuring me, hinting around that my job was in jeopardy if I
didn't take the tests and pass them. I finally had enough and told the
operations manager than I wasn't going to waste my own money on taking 5,
$250 tests, that I knew I would fail (you only get reimbursed if you pass
all five of the tests and get the certification). The operations manager
told my boss and my boss told me he'd "let" me "stay with the company" but
my duties would have to change (or rather be added to). Along with doing
all my current work (web development) I now have to do all the
administrative assistant tasks (he never did hire another admin person after
his last one walked out on him in the middle of a work day two months ago).
I will also have to act as backup to the operations manager. And since he
wants the phones answered from 8 to 6 I'll have to work from 8AM to 6PM 5
days a week (and if I need quiet time to do complex coding I'll have to come
in at 6Am but still leave at 6PM).

I know, I know, find another job - and I have been *DESPERATELY* looking for
one for three months now with no luck (as a lot of you here can sympathize
with - does our economy suck or what!!??). I think I'm running into the UFO
phenomenon though (ugly, fat, and old) because no matter how perfect I am
for a job, no matter how good the "fit" I'm not getting even one call back.

So anyway, no more whining about that - this is that last I'll even talk
about it, I just would appreciate some advice on how I might change it.

OB...

All the kitties are doing well although I had to take Samazon to the vet two
weeks ago to have her anal glands expressed (eeeewwwwww!). She was
amazingly good, and the vet and tech were amazingly brave to take her on
without a tranquilizer gun.

Bandit is still feeling chipper and getting around really well despite her
blindness. She has a great appetite, no litter box problems, and is as mean
as ever, so if it is a tumor causing her blindness, then that's all it's
causing - I just pray that if it is a tumor it's a very slow growing one
that will allow her years and years of time before it takes her.

Jessie is feeling really frisky with the cooler weather - her zoomies have
increased to 4 or 5 times a day and I expect to see the carpet smoking as
she blazes around the house, up and down stairs and across whole rooms
without touching the floor.

Demi is still our little valley girl... vain, kind of dumb, but exquisitely
beautiful even if she is never seen!

--

Hugs,

CatNipped

See all my masters at: http://www.PossiblePlaces.com/CatNipped/

CatNipped wrote:
I promised myself I wouldn't come back to the group until I could stop
whining about my problems. OK, I'm not going to whine, I want to *DO*
something to change things.

The problem... I think I've become a perpetual "victim". This is the
second boss in a row who is being really abusive to me. It's like "fool me
once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me". I need to figure out how to
get back my self respect as well as get respect from the people around me (I
had it once, so I know it's possible).

Just because I couldn't pass the MCAD/MCSD certification exams (even though
I do all the work assigned to me 3 times faster than any other employee), my
boss kept pressuring me, hinting around that my job was in jeopardy if I
didn't take the tests and pass them. I finally had enough and told the
operations manager than I wasn't going to waste my own money on taking 5,
$250 tests, that I knew I would fail (you only get reimbursed if you pass
all five of the tests and get the certification). The operations manager
told my boss and my boss told me he'd "let" me "stay with the company" but
my duties would have to change (or rather be added to). Along with doing
all my current work (web development) I now have to do all the
administrative assistant tasks (he never did hire another admin person after
his last one walked out on him in the middle of a work day two months ago).
I will also have to act as backup to the operations manager. And since he
wants the phones answered from 8 to 6 I'll have to work from 8AM to 6PM 5
days a week (and if I need quiet time to do complex coding I'll have to come
in at 6Am but still leave at 6PM).

I know, I know, find another job - and I have been *DESPERATELY* looking for
one for three months now with no luck (as a lot of you here can sympathize
with - does our economy suck or what!!??). I think I'm running into the UFO
phenomenon though (ugly, fat, and old) because no matter how perfect I am
for a job, no matter how good the "fit" I'm not getting even one call back.

So anyway, no more whining about that - this is that last I'll even talk
about it, I just would appreciate some advice on how I might change it.

OB...

All the kitties are doing well although I had to take Samazon to the vet two
weeks ago to have her anal glands expressed (eeeewwwwww!). She was
amazingly good, and the vet and tech were amazingly brave to take her on
without a tranquilizer gun.

Bandit is still feeling chipper and getting around really well despite her
blindness. She has a great appetite, no litter box problems, and is as mean
as ever, so if it is a tumor causing her blindness, then that's all it's
causing - I just pray that if it is a tumor it's a very slow growing one
that will allow her years and years of time before it takes her.

Jessie is feeling really frisky with the cooler weather - her zoomies have
increased to 4 or 5 times a day and I expect to see the carpet smoking as
she blazes around the house, up and down stairs and across whole rooms
without touching the floor.

Demi is still our little valley girl... vain, kind of dumb, but exquisitely
beautiful even if she is never seen!

--

Hugs,

CatNipped

boggle That sounds like an *awful* lot of responsibility for someone
theyre "letting stay on with the company." When you're feeling really
bad, try to imagine the day that you dump that clod of a boss and see
him struggling to fill your shoes the day after you leave.
It's like you said, you've still got within you all the attributes
you've always had. And you're *certainly*not either U, F, or O.
I don't even pretend to know anything about the field that you're in,
but after reading postings here from different folks, I imagine that it
would be very hard to work in. Technology changes so fast and there's
so much competition. It sounds tough.
Glad the kitties are good, especially Bandit, I was thinking about her
the other day.

Sherry

No cluons were harmed when "CatNipped" wrote:
Just because I couldn't pass the MCAD/MCSD certification
exams (even though I do all the work assigned to me 3
times faster than any other employee), my boss
kept pressuring me, hinting around that my job was in jeopardy
if I didn't take the tests and pass them. I finally had enough
and told the operations manager than I wasn't going to waste
my own money on taking 5, $250 tests, that I knew I would
fail (you only get reimbursed if you pass all five of the tests and
get the certification). The
operations manager told my boss and my boss told me he'd
"let" me "stay with the company" but my duties would have to change
(or rather be added to).

Sounds like he has someone younger and/or from a foreign country, who
will do the same work for half the salary, and he is trying to drive
you away without actually firing you.

Some thoughts:

1. You may be in a position to claim age harassment, although any
harassment claims need to be solidly documented.

2. If you have business cards, and the title is specific, you can
point out that the additional duties fo not fall under that title.

3. You can point out that the additional duties do not fall under the
job description as discussed when you were hired.

4. You can point out that certification was not a requirement, and
that you results speak out for your comptency.

At any rate, you are being scammed by a manager on a budget, who is
trying to use fear as a motivator and who may be getting a percentage
of every dollar saved, as a bonus. It is also possible that this
manager has the "if you aren't degreed/certified, then you don't
really know this stuff" mindset - which is a load of anally expressed
goo (evil grin).

It is in your best interests to get out of these additional duties,
or you will end up as the technical equivalent of a Walmart greeter.

If you can get out from under this manager, that might help...


Hugs and Purrs,
Mark
--
Proof of Sanity Forged Upon Request

"Mark Edwards" wrote in message
...
No cluons were harmed when "CatNipped" wrote:
Just because I couldn't pass the MCAD/MCSD certification
exams (even though I do all the work assigned to me 3
times faster than any other employee), my boss
kept pressuring me, hinting around that my job was in jeopardy
if I didn't take the tests and pass them. I finally had enough
and told the operations manager than I wasn't going to waste
my own money on taking 5, $250 tests, that I knew I would
fail (you only get reimbursed if you pass all five of the tests and
get the certification). The
operations manager told my boss and my boss told me he'd
"let" me "stay with the company" but my duties would have to change
(or rather be added to).

Sounds like he has someone younger and/or from a foreign country, who
will do the same work for half the salary, and he is trying to drive
you away without actually firing you.

Some thoughts:

1. You may be in a position to claim age harassment, although any
harassment claims need to be solidly documented.

2. If you have business cards, and the title is specific, you can
point out that the additional duties fo not fall under that title.

3. You can point out that the additional duties do not fall under the
job description as discussed when you were hired.

4. You can point out that certification was not a requirement, and
that you results speak out for your comptency.

At any rate, you are being scammed by a manager on a budget, who is
trying to use fear as a motivator and who may be getting a percentage
of every dollar saved, as a bonus. It is also possible that this
manager has the "if you aren't degreed/certified, then you don't
really know this stuff" mindset - which is a load of anally expressed
goo (evil grin).

It is in your best interests to get out of these additional duties,
or you will end up as the technical equivalent of a Walmart greeter.

If you can get out from under this manager, that might help...


It's so dreadful if your manager decides to use you in this way, probably
because his bosses want his *own* performance to improve.

I was once in this situation myself. I was able to sort it out because my
employer is government based and bullying is not allowed, even so, it wasn't
easy.
Lori, I know what it's like and I feel your pain. I don't know what to
advise you to do though, if you aren't in a union or work for the govt.

It's a well known method of bullying to give someone an unachievable
workload.
This was done to myself as at the time my manager hated me, our political
views didn't connect.
I was able to access the Welfare Service of my employer for advice and saw
the Occupational Health doctor as I'd become unable to work because of it.
Oh, wow, how this helped! After an interview with the OH doc, she sent a
strong letter that they must stop this workplace bullying immediately and I
was moved to another team with a different manager which I love, and am very
happy in.

I hope you find a better job soon. Private sector jobs suck, they think
they can do what they like with you.
Tweed

"Christina Websell" wrote in message
...

"Mark Edwards" wrote in message
...
No cluons were harmed when "CatNipped" wrote:
Just because I couldn't pass the MCAD/MCSD certification
exams (even though I do all the work assigned to me 3
times faster than any other employee), my boss
kept pressuring me, hinting around that my job was in jeopardy
if I didn't take the tests and pass them. I finally had enough
and told the operations manager than I wasn't going to waste
my own money on taking 5, $250 tests, that I knew I would
fail (you only get reimbursed if you pass all five of the tests and
get the certification). The
operations manager told my boss and my boss told me he'd
"let" me "stay with the company" but my duties would have to change
(or rather be added to).

Sounds like he has someone younger and/or from a foreign country, who
will do the same work for half the salary, and he is trying to drive
you away without actually firing you.

Some thoughts:

1. You may be in a position to claim age harassment, although any
harassment claims need to be solidly documented.

2. If you have business cards, and the title is specific, you can
point out that the additional duties fo not fall under that title.

3. You can point out that the additional duties do not fall under the
job description as discussed when you were hired.

4. You can point out that certification was not a requirement, and
that you results speak out for your comptency.

At any rate, you are being scammed by a manager on a budget, who is
trying to use fear as a motivator and who may be getting a percentage
of every dollar saved, as a bonus. It is also possible that this
manager has the "if you aren't degreed/certified, then you don't
really know this stuff" mindset - which is a load of anally expressed
goo (evil grin).

It is in your best interests to get out of these additional duties,
or you will end up as the technical equivalent of a Walmart greeter.

If you can get out from under this manager, that might help...


It's so dreadful if your manager decides to use you in this way, probably
because his bosses want his *own* performance to improve.

I was once in this situation myself. I was able to sort it out because my
employer is government based and bullying is not allowed, even so, it
wasn't easy.
Lori, I know what it's like and I feel your pain. I don't know what to
advise you to do though, if you aren't in a union or work for the govt.

It's a well known method of bullying to give someone an unachievable
workload.
This was done to myself as at the time my manager hated me, our political
views didn't connect.
I was able to access the Welfare Service of my employer for advice and saw
the Occupational Health doctor as I'd become unable to work because of it.
Oh, wow, how this helped! After an interview with the OH doc, she sent a
strong letter that they must stop this workplace bullying immediately and
I was moved to another team with a different manager which I love, and am
very happy in.

I hope you find a better job soon. Private sector jobs suck, they think
they can do what they like with you.
Tweed

Yeah, since this business has only 8 employees it doesn't even have to abide
by most federal employee laws in this country. Sucks - but I'm diligently
looking for another job, so maybe I'll be out of this situation soon.


--

Hugs,

CatNipped

See all my masters at: http://www.PossiblePlaces.com/CatNipped/

"CatNipped" wrote in message
...
....
The problem... I think I've become a perpetual "victim". This is the
second boss in a row who is being really abusive to me. ... Hugs,
CatNipped

Hi Catnipped,

Before you do anything, go to Google and search the words "workplace
bullies." You'll find that this is a real problem and there are ways to
combat it. I speak from experience that being the target of a workplace
bully can cause serious damage to your self esteem. Stress also can affect
your ability to function on and off the job.

Also, look for information on combating test taking fears. If you can do
the job, it seems that you should be able to pass the test. It's not clear
if you took a test and didn't pass, or you are just assuming that you
wouldn't pass if you took it. Perhaps you can get a study course to help
you prep for the test or take a pretest of some kind you could gain some
self confidence.

I understand that you are apprehensive about the cost. That is pretty
steep. But, if you can find some way to invest in the preparation and
manage to pass, not only will you keep this job, you will be more employable
for a job someplace else.

If the certification is a job requirement, you should have been told this
when you were hired. Sometimes people will be hired for a position and
given a period of time to complete the requirement. If the certification
is a job requirement, your boss probably is being generous by "letting" you
stay on since your stated position is that you can't pass the test. He may
need to revise your duties to conform with company policy.

However, just piling more work onto your job duties isn't fair. Watch out
for the word "administration" in the title. If you are forced to work more
than 40 hours a week, you will be entitled to overtime if you are on an
hourly wage. It does not apply to some "administrative" positions, which
are exempt from this protection. I believe these must be supervisory
positions, but don't take my word on it.

If the certification is not a requirement and your co-workers are doing web
development without it, it seems to me that you are being singled out and
mistreated by being pressured to spend your own money to take the tests as
well as having your job duties changed.

Unfortunately, Texas is a state where you can be fired "at will," as long as
it is not because of some form of illegal discrimination. Of course,
proving that it is illegal discrimination can be about impossible. Also, as
I understand it, harassment itself is not specifically prohibited by law,
unless it is sexual or against protected groups.

Because you are having such a hard time finding a different job, you might
ask yourself what skills you have that could be used in a different line of
work. Maybe you need a change.

Also, check with the temporary employment agencies. See what they can offer
you for work and an evaluation of why you are having problems getting hired.
It may be the workplace. Or, you may be unaware of something you are doing
to sabotage your efforts.

If you are good at what you do, with a temporary agency, you could end up
working full time while making connections that will net you a permanent
job. Some of the temporary agencies also offer benefits and training to
develop new job skills or those you already have.

Good luck with your search. Skritches for your kitties.

Annie

..

...
The problem... I think I've become a perpetual "victim". This is the
second boss in a row who is being really abusive to me. ... Hugs,
CatNipped


Document the crap out of everything. I don' t know the law in your
state and it may be worth investigating, but I would think it would be
illegal for a boss to:

1. force you to do a pile of duties not under your job description
when you were hired IN ADDITION TO the job you were hired for
2. forcing you to work overtime without appropriate financial
compensation for the overtime
3. treating you in a way different from your coworkers (ie, giving you
far more work than they have, or expecting you to do things much faster
than they do)
4. give you a job without mentioning tests, then tell you you need to
pay for a bunch of tests out of your own pocket in order to keep it,
and firing you if you don't
5. refusing you time for necessary medical treatment

Write down everything. What happened, what day, what time, where, who
saw it, who said what...if you need to go to court, a written record
day-by-day on your side is much more valuable than your word alone.

In the meantime:

You have skills. You have abilities. You know you're doing good work.
You can offer that to other companies, why? Because YOU want a job.
YOU want it, so you're going out to get it. It is in their best
interests to hire you. Let them know why.

You need to stop focusing on your need for that job and start focusing
on why they would be lucky to hire you...and making sure that it gets
communicated.

Purrs.

--Fil

Wish I could offer some "never fails" advice but I really don't have
any, other than UFO does *NOT* apply - I've seen your pix. Megapurrs
that something *wonderful* comes you way quickly.

Skritches to the furrkids from here.

--
Sam, closely supervised by Mistletoe

CatNipped wrote:
I know, I know, find another job - and I have been *DESPERATELY*
looking for one for three months now with no luck (as a lot of you
here can sympathize with - does our economy suck or what!!??). I
think I'm running into the UFO phenomenon though (ugly, fat, and old)
because no matter how perfect I am for a job, no matter how good the
"fit" I'm not getting even one call back.

You aren't ugly, you aren't fat, you aren't old. Unfortunately I'm running
into the same sort of age mentality in finding a new job. No one wants to
hire a middle-aged woman (regardless of what she looks like). I've said it
before, I'll say it again. They can pay a kid just out of college who has 2
roommates and no bills next to nothing and they are *thrilled* to be earning
18,000 USD a year, woo hoo! More beer! We, on the other hand, require a
lot more in salary and benefits. Yet we'd benefit the company so much more
in terms of knowledge and experience. We don't have to be trained. But
that is, unfortunately, the way of things these days. They can train
drones. Heh, might as well hire a robot.

But you've gotten some great advice here. While age discrimination is next
to impossible to prove, you do have some leverage when it comes to going to
the state about being assigned duties above and beyond your original job
description. You do have some leverage when it comes to threatening your
boss right back about a lawsuit for hiring you and THEN requiring you take
these tests if it wasn't in the original job description and others aren't
being required to take them. Also with not paying overtime but requiring
you to work it. Even salaried/exempt employees have the option of saying
"no, this is too much".

I've probably mentioned this before but I remember once there were shifts
where some of us had to cover the day before (or after) a long weekend. The
company let everyone off early but a few people had to stay, you know? In
my department we rotated it. But it came around Christmas and it was K's
turn to stay at the office. I was taken aside and it was *strongly*
suggested to me that maybe I'd rather work on Christmas eve because I "don't
have children" and K does and he'd probably like to spend it with his kids.
And wouldn't I rather take the early off day for the next July 4th instead?
I guess the presumption was I'd rather go party for the 4th of July than see
anyone in my family on Christmas eve.

I caved to the pressure but when I told my father about this he was FURIOUS!
How dare they presume such a thing? How dare they ask you? And the funny
thing is K told me he would rather have had the 4th of July long weekend to
go camping with his family, but he was pressured into this too. By managers
who thought they knew our personal lives and preferences better than we did.
Go figure! Why didn't they just call us in a room and ask us?! K and I
knew each other from way back; we'd have been honest. If we'd both wanted
the same time off we'd have hashed it out. It didn't have to be this
managerial cloak and dagger sort of thing.

Sorry, now *I'm* ranting, Lori! Purrs for you to get out from under this
tyrannical boss, ASAP. I know you can do it. And I'll find a job that
suits me, too. I'm running into the age discrimation thing, I think, but
then, I don't have a job so I can't file a complaint if they don't hire me.
There's no law forcing anyone to hire me.

Jill ---going to hug her cat now

On Sun, 29 Oct 2006 07:03:21 -0600, "jmcquown"
wrote:

But you've gotten some great advice here. While age discrimination is next
to impossible to prove, you do have some leverage when it comes to going to
the state about being assigned duties above and beyond your original job
description. You do have some leverage when it comes to threatening your
boss right back about a lawsuit for hiring you and THEN requiring you take
these tests if it wasn't in the original job description and others aren't
being required to take them.

Then again, there are "right to work" states (I live in one). Don't be
fooled by the phrase "right to work" because all it means is that your
employer has the right to decide who works and who doesn't. They can
fire you for any reason they want to, as long as it doesn't involve
age, race, sex, religion, national origin, or sexual orientation. They
think you're too old but say they're firing you because you had one
cat hair on your leg, then there's not a whole lot you can do about
it. It's so hard to make most discrimination charges stick that you
almost to get a nefarious plot to discriminate against you in your
employer's handwriting. Most employers aren't that stupid, but some
are.

FORTUNATELY, a lot of employers do seem to back down a bit when the
appropriate state agency comes knocking at their door, and agree to
some sort of settlement.

I'm a huge believer in sticking with your job (unless it's absolutely
unbearable) until you have a new one lined up. Being unemployed for 2
years will do that to a person.



No, knowing this stuff isn't part of *my* job (thank gawd) so I'm not
an expert (and I didn't sleep at a Holiday Inn Express last night),
but I do work for a state agency that has people who address such
things. I sit near the guy who investigates discrimination cases, and
we talk about his cases sometimes so, as one of the newbies, I will
know what sorts of things to look for and what sort of evidence I need
in these situations.



Jeanne Hedge, as directed by Natasha

============
http://www.jhedge.com