Green-eyed monster

Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster. In
the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I don't
talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in bed, he
makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck. Lately it's
gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days now. She does
occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I can pet her while
I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because she's made at me or
something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any method
I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of Pickles is
likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the same time I'm
spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

On Jun 17, 1:15*am, "Joy" wrote:
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster. *In
the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I don't
talk to her. *However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in bed, he
makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck. *Lately it's
gotten worse. *Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days now. *She does
occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I can pet her while
I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because she's made at me or
something. *I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. *Any method
I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of Pickles is
likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the same time I'm
spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

I know that cats aren't dogs, but one of the things that's dealt with
on a show called "It's Me or the Dog" is resource guarding. In this
case, your lap and attention are the resources. Some of the problem
dogs on that show, which a trainer has come in to help remedy, are
guarding resources inappropriately. Often, it's things like not
letting anyone near Mommy when they're sitting on Mommy's lap. Or not
letting hubby get into bed at night if wifey and doggie have already
retired to said bed.

The trainer has the human begin to regulate who gets the
"resource" (of attention and lap time) and how much they get. So if
the dog's in Mom's lap and snarls at a person or pet, off the lap they
go. After a few instances of being put on the floor for snarling, they
get the message that they won't be allowed to sit in the lap if they
act like that.

Cats haven't got the kind of "I want to please my humans" motivation
that has been bred into dogs, but they do learn quickly when it comes
to getting, or keeping, something they want. In this case, it's lap
time and attention. When Waffles realizes that acting up results in
deprivation of the lap or the attention, that should make a
difference.

Even with my two cats, who as far as I can tell were littermates and
who get along famously, every now and then I see an instance where the
larger cat (Captain, 15 lbs) asserts himself over the smaller one
(Stanley, 11 lbs). He uses the same "scruff and straddle" maneuver you
described. If it's brief, I ignore it, since it's normal for cats to
have a "pecking order". But if I think it's going on too long, I wave
the squirt bottle. The sight of that usually inspires both cats to
find something else to do. ;-) Rarely, I wind up spraying water, which
DEFINITELY convinces the cats that it's time to move on to a different
activity. I hate to wet both cats when only one is acting up. But then
again, when I intervene in this case, I figure it's MY way of
asserting myself as the Alpha Cat over everybody else, no matter who
else falls where else on the pecking order. And when I say, "Knock off
playing 'I'm the Boss of You', I mean it."

I hope this helps.

Donna, Captain, Stanley, and Mini

"Gabey8" wrote in message
...
On Jun 17, 1:15 am, "Joy" wrote:
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster. In
the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I don't
talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in bed, he
makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck. Lately it's
gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days now. She does
occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I can pet her
while
I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because she's made at me
or
something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any method
I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of Pickles
is
likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the same time
I'm
spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

I know that cats aren't dogs, but one of the things that's dealt with
on a show called "It's Me or the Dog" is resource guarding. In this
case, your lap and attention are the resources. Some of the problem
dogs on that show, which a trainer has come in to help remedy, are
guarding resources inappropriately. Often, it's things like not
letting anyone near Mommy when they're sitting on Mommy's lap. Or not
letting hubby get into bed at night if wifey and doggie have already
retired to said bed.

The trainer has the human begin to regulate who gets the
"resource" (of attention and lap time) and how much they get. So if
the dog's in Mom's lap and snarls at a person or pet, off the lap they
go. After a few instances of being put on the floor for snarling, they
get the message that they won't be allowed to sit in the lap if they
act like that.

Cats haven't got the kind of "I want to please my humans" motivation
that has been bred into dogs, but they do learn quickly when it comes
to getting, or keeping, something they want. In this case, it's lap
time and attention. When Waffles realizes that acting up results in
deprivation of the lap or the attention, that should make a
difference.

Even with my two cats, who as far as I can tell were littermates and
who get along famously, every now and then I see an instance where the
larger cat (Captain, 15 lbs) asserts himself over the smaller one
(Stanley, 11 lbs). He uses the same "scruff and straddle" maneuver you
described. If it's brief, I ignore it, since it's normal for cats to
have a "pecking order". But if I think it's going on too long, I wave
the squirt bottle. The sight of that usually inspires both cats to
find something else to do. ;-) Rarely, I wind up spraying water, which
DEFINITELY convinces the cats that it's time to move on to a different
activity. I hate to wet both cats when only one is acting up. But then
again, when I intervene in this case, I figure it's MY way of
asserting myself as the Alpha Cat over everybody else, no matter who
else falls where else on the pecking order. And when I say, "Knock off
playing 'I'm the Boss of You', I mean it."

I hope this helps.

Donna, Captain, Stanley, and Mini

***

Thanks, Donna. If Waffles acted up when he were on my lap, your first
suggestion would work. However, he's more of a cat in the manger. He never
wants to cuddle with me in bed, but he'll just lie on the foot of the bed
unless Pickles comes up for a cuddle. Then he makes her move and
"disciplines" her. He does the same thing if she's in my lap and I talk to
her.

I might try a water bottle, although his fur is so thick, I doubt if he'd
feel it. That gives me an idea, though. I did break Skeeter (RB) of a bad
habit by using a spray can of air. After a few times, all I had to do was
hiss and he'd stop.

I do appreciate your trying to help.

Joy

fellingway? and the vanilla trick or the towel trick... after typing this i
realized i was saying use all those introduction type strategeies. so maybe
seperate them clean house then reintroduce them?

Lee
"Joy" wrote in message
. ..
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster. In
the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I don't
talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in bed, he
makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck. Lately it's
gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days now. She
does occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I can pet her
while I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because she's made
at me or something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any
method I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of
Pickles is likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the
same time I'm spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

the spray bottle really does work, most of the time one of us just has to
say do you want water monsters? next step is picking up the bottle, by then
the bad thing has stopped, once in a while, like when salmon is ON the table
a spray is required, Lee
"Gabey8" wrote in message
...
On Jun 17, 1:15 am, "Joy" wrote:
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster. In
the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I don't
talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in bed, he
makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck. Lately it's
gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days now. She does
occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I can pet her
while
I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because she's made at me
or
something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any method
I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of Pickles
is
likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the same time
I'm
spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

I know that cats aren't dogs, but one of the things that's dealt with
on a show called "It's Me or the Dog" is resource guarding. In this
case, your lap and attention are the resources. Some of the problem
dogs on that show, which a trainer has come in to help remedy, are
guarding resources inappropriately. Often, it's things like not
letting anyone near Mommy when they're sitting on Mommy's lap. Or not
letting hubby get into bed at night if wifey and doggie have already
retired to said bed.

The trainer has the human begin to regulate who gets the
"resource" (of attention and lap time) and how much they get. So if
the dog's in Mom's lap and snarls at a person or pet, off the lap they
go. After a few instances of being put on the floor for snarling, they
get the message that they won't be allowed to sit in the lap if they
act like that.

Cats haven't got the kind of "I want to please my humans" motivation
that has been bred into dogs, but they do learn quickly when it comes
to getting, or keeping, something they want. In this case, it's lap
time and attention. When Waffles realizes that acting up results in
deprivation of the lap or the attention, that should make a
difference.

Even with my two cats, who as far as I can tell were littermates and
who get along famously, every now and then I see an instance where the
larger cat (Captain, 15 lbs) asserts himself over the smaller one
(Stanley, 11 lbs). He uses the same "scruff and straddle" maneuver you
described. If it's brief, I ignore it, since it's normal for cats to
have a "pecking order". But if I think it's going on too long, I wave
the squirt bottle. The sight of that usually inspires both cats to
find something else to do. ;-) Rarely, I wind up spraying water, which
DEFINITELY convinces the cats that it's time to move on to a different
activity. I hate to wet both cats when only one is acting up. But then
again, when I intervene in this case, I figure it's MY way of
asserting myself as the Alpha Cat over everybody else, no matter who
else falls where else on the pecking order. And when I say, "Knock off
playing 'I'm the Boss of You', I mean it."

I hope this helps.

Donna, Captain, Stanley, and Mini

for the thicker furred among us the water in the rear end works really welll
also if you can get the bottom end of the tail or right on the chest Lee
"Joy" wrote in message
. ..
"Gabey8" wrote in message
...
On Jun 17, 1:15 am, "Joy" wrote:
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster. In
the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I don't
talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in bed, he
makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck. Lately it's
gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days now. She does
occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I can pet her
while
I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because she's made at me
or
something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any
method
I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of Pickles
is
likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the same time
I'm
spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

I know that cats aren't dogs, but one of the things that's dealt with
on a show called "It's Me or the Dog" is resource guarding. In this
case, your lap and attention are the resources. Some of the problem
dogs on that show, which a trainer has come in to help remedy, are
guarding resources inappropriately. Often, it's things like not
letting anyone near Mommy when they're sitting on Mommy's lap. Or not
letting hubby get into bed at night if wifey and doggie have already
retired to said bed.

The trainer has the human begin to regulate who gets the
"resource" (of attention and lap time) and how much they get. So if
the dog's in Mom's lap and snarls at a person or pet, off the lap they
go. After a few instances of being put on the floor for snarling, they
get the message that they won't be allowed to sit in the lap if they
act like that.

Cats haven't got the kind of "I want to please my humans" motivation
that has been bred into dogs, but they do learn quickly when it comes
to getting, or keeping, something they want. In this case, it's lap
time and attention. When Waffles realizes that acting up results in
deprivation of the lap or the attention, that should make a
difference.

Even with my two cats, who as far as I can tell were littermates and
who get along famously, every now and then I see an instance where the
larger cat (Captain, 15 lbs) asserts himself over the smaller one
(Stanley, 11 lbs). He uses the same "scruff and straddle" maneuver you
described. If it's brief, I ignore it, since it's normal for cats to
have a "pecking order". But if I think it's going on too long, I wave
the squirt bottle. The sight of that usually inspires both cats to
find something else to do. ;-) Rarely, I wind up spraying water, which
DEFINITELY convinces the cats that it's time to move on to a different
activity. I hate to wet both cats when only one is acting up. But then
again, when I intervene in this case, I figure it's MY way of
asserting myself as the Alpha Cat over everybody else, no matter who
else falls where else on the pecking order. And when I say, "Knock off
playing 'I'm the Boss of You', I mean it."

I hope this helps.

Donna, Captain, Stanley, and Mini

***

Thanks, Donna. If Waffles acted up when he were on my lap, your first
suggestion would work. However, he's more of a cat in the manger. He
never wants to cuddle with me in bed, but he'll just lie on the foot of
the bed unless Pickles comes up for a cuddle. Then he makes her move and
"disciplines" her. He does the same thing if she's in my lap and I talk
to her.

I might try a water bottle, although his fur is so thick, I doubt if he'd
feel it. That gives me an idea, though. I did break Skeeter (RB) of a
bad habit by using a spray can of air. After a few times, all I had to do
was hiss and he'd stop.

I do appreciate your trying to help.

Joy

They're littermates. They had been together for three years when I got
them, and I've had them for over a year now.

--
Joy

Don't believe everything you think

"Stormmee" wrote in message
...
fellingway? and the vanilla trick or the towel trick... after typing this
i realized i was saying use all those introduction type strategeies. so
maybe seperate them clean house then reintroduce them?

Lee
"Joy" wrote in message
. ..
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster.
In the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I
don't talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in
bed, he makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck.
Lately it's gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days
now. She does occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I
can pet her while I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because
she's made at me or something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any
method I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of
Pickles is likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the
same time I'm spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

The chest would be a bit difficult if he's straddling Pickles, but I might
be able to get the bottom of the tail then.

--
Joy

Don't believe everything you think

"Stormmee" wrote in message
...
for the thicker furred among us the water in the rear end works really
welll also if you can get the bottom end of the tail or right on the chest
Lee
"Joy" wrote in message
. ..
"Gabey8" wrote in message
...
On Jun 17, 1:15 am, "Joy" wrote:
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster.
In
the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I
don't
talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in bed, he
makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck. Lately it's
gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days now. She
does
occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I can pet her
while
I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because she's made at me
or
something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any
method
I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of Pickles
is
likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the same time
I'm
spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

I know that cats aren't dogs, but one of the things that's dealt with
on a show called "It's Me or the Dog" is resource guarding. In this
case, your lap and attention are the resources. Some of the problem
dogs on that show, which a trainer has come in to help remedy, are
guarding resources inappropriately. Often, it's things like not
letting anyone near Mommy when they're sitting on Mommy's lap. Or not
letting hubby get into bed at night if wifey and doggie have already
retired to said bed.

The trainer has the human begin to regulate who gets the
"resource" (of attention and lap time) and how much they get. So if
the dog's in Mom's lap and snarls at a person or pet, off the lap they
go. After a few instances of being put on the floor for snarling, they
get the message that they won't be allowed to sit in the lap if they
act like that.

Cats haven't got the kind of "I want to please my humans" motivation
that has been bred into dogs, but they do learn quickly when it comes
to getting, or keeping, something they want. In this case, it's lap
time and attention. When Waffles realizes that acting up results in
deprivation of the lap or the attention, that should make a
difference.

Even with my two cats, who as far as I can tell were littermates and
who get along famously, every now and then I see an instance where the
larger cat (Captain, 15 lbs) asserts himself over the smaller one
(Stanley, 11 lbs). He uses the same "scruff and straddle" maneuver you
described. If it's brief, I ignore it, since it's normal for cats to
have a "pecking order". But if I think it's going on too long, I wave
the squirt bottle. The sight of that usually inspires both cats to
find something else to do. ;-) Rarely, I wind up spraying water, which
DEFINITELY convinces the cats that it's time to move on to a different
activity. I hate to wet both cats when only one is acting up. But then
again, when I intervene in this case, I figure it's MY way of
asserting myself as the Alpha Cat over everybody else, no matter who
else falls where else on the pecking order. And when I say, "Knock off
playing 'I'm the Boss of You', I mean it."

I hope this helps.

Donna, Captain, Stanley, and Mini

***

Thanks, Donna. If Waffles acted up when he were on my lap, your first
suggestion would work. However, he's more of a cat in the manger. He
never wants to cuddle with me in bed, but he'll just lie on the foot of
the bed unless Pickles comes up for a cuddle. Then he makes her move and
"disciplines" her. He does the same thing if she's in my lap and I talk
to her.

I might try a water bottle, although his fur is so thick, I doubt if he'd
feel it. That gives me an idea, though. I did break Skeeter (RB) of a
bad habit by using a spray can of air. After a few times, all I had to
do was hiss and he'd stop.

I do appreciate your trying to help.

Joy

i think sometimes a fresh start is in order no matter the relationship of
the beings in question, Lee
"Joy" wrote in message
. ..
They're littermates. They had been together for three years when I got
them, and I've had them for over a year now.

--
Joy

Don't believe everything you think

"Stormmee" wrote in message
...
fellingway? and the vanilla trick or the towel trick... after typing this
i realized i was saying use all those introduction type strategeies. so
maybe seperate them clean house then reintroduce them?

Lee
"Joy" wrote in message
. ..
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster.
In the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I
don't talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in
bed, he makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck.
Lately it's gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days
now. She does occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I
can pet her while I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't
because she's made at me or something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any
method I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of
Pickles is likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at
the same time I'm spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

you could go for the ears, they really hate that but you need to go for the
back of the ears, going for the front can be an issue if too much water gets
in, Lee
"Joy" wrote in message
. ..
The chest would be a bit difficult if he's straddling Pickles, but I might
be able to get the bottom of the tail then.

--
Joy

Don't believe everything you think

"Stormmee" wrote in message
...
for the thicker furred among us the water in the rear end works really
welll also if you can get the bottom end of the tail or right on the
chest Lee
"Joy" wrote in message
. ..
"Gabey8" wrote in message
...
On Jun 17, 1:15 am, "Joy" wrote:
Waffles, who actually does have green eyes, is turning into a monster.
In
the past, he has allowed Pickles to come up on my lap, as long as I
don't
talk to her. However, if I talk to her, or if she comes to me in bed,
he
makes her get down, then straddles her and bites her neck. Lately it's
gotten worse. Pickles hasn't come up on my lap for two days now. She
does
occasionally come into my office for a minute or two so I can pet her
while
I'm sitting at the computer, so I know it isn't because she's made at
me or
something. I'm sure Waffles is behind it.

I can't let things go on this way, but I don't know what to do. Any
method
I can think of to control or punish Waffles for his treatment of
Pickles is
likely to make him pick on her even more, especially if at the same
time I'm
spending more time with her.

Does anybody have any suggestions?

Joy

I know that cats aren't dogs, but one of the things that's dealt with
on a show called "It's Me or the Dog" is resource guarding. In this
case, your lap and attention are the resources. Some of the problem
dogs on that show, which a trainer has come in to help remedy, are
guarding resources inappropriately. Often, it's things like not
letting anyone near Mommy when they're sitting on Mommy's lap. Or not
letting hubby get into bed at night if wifey and doggie have already
retired to said bed.

The trainer has the human begin to regulate who gets the
"resource" (of attention and lap time) and how much they get. So if
the dog's in Mom's lap and snarls at a person or pet, off the lap they
go. After a few instances of being put on the floor for snarling, they
get the message that they won't be allowed to sit in the lap if they
act like that.

Cats haven't got the kind of "I want to please my humans" motivation
that has been bred into dogs, but they do learn quickly when it comes
to getting, or keeping, something they want. In this case, it's lap
time and attention. When Waffles realizes that acting up results in
deprivation of the lap or the attention, that should make a
difference.

Even with my two cats, who as far as I can tell were littermates and
who get along famously, every now and then I see an instance where the
larger cat (Captain, 15 lbs) asserts himself over the smaller one
(Stanley, 11 lbs). He uses the same "scruff and straddle" maneuver you
described. If it's brief, I ignore it, since it's normal for cats to
have a "pecking order". But if I think it's going on too long, I wave
the squirt bottle. The sight of that usually inspires both cats to
find something else to do. ;-) Rarely, I wind up spraying water, which
DEFINITELY convinces the cats that it's time to move on to a different
activity. I hate to wet both cats when only one is acting up. But then
again, when I intervene in this case, I figure it's MY way of
asserting myself as the Alpha Cat over everybody else, no matter who
else falls where else on the pecking order. And when I say, "Knock off
playing 'I'm the Boss of You', I mean it."

I hope this helps.

Donna, Captain, Stanley, and Mini

***

Thanks, Donna. If Waffles acted up when he were on my lap, your first
suggestion would work. However, he's more of a cat in the manger. He
never wants to cuddle with me in bed, but he'll just lie on the foot of
the bed unless Pickles comes up for a cuddle. Then he makes her move
and "disciplines" her. He does the same thing if she's in my lap and I
talk to her.

I might try a water bottle, although his fur is so thick, I doubt if
he'd feel it. That gives me an idea, though. I did break Skeeter (RB)
of a bad habit by using a spray can of air. After a few times, all I
had to do was hiss and he'd stop.

I do appreciate your trying to help.

Joy