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  #1  
Old March 23rd 08, 11:52 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Yowie
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3,225
Default Real Life

I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been through the
same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other people
are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our lives, our
relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality of the people or
pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would have....." and
go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but really, we are in no
position to truly understand and appreciate *all* the factors that go into
the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves, that the
other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not be our own best,
we may have made different choices had we been in the same situation, but if
we have any faith in each other at all, then we need to support each other
even though perhaps we would have done things differently had we been
presented with the same situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second guessing
themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able to make a
'better' decision, even though there is no 'better' decision to make. Those
that make a person feel even guiltier for doing the Right Thing are simply
projecting their own fear and their own guilt. They do not know the intimate
details of the situation, and are in no position to judge. And most
tellingly, when asked to do what they have just berated another person for
*not* doing, they fall oddly silent, knowing that in Reality, they are just
as powerless to stop Real Life and the tragedy that is part of it as anyone
else. What they are really railing against, it seems to me, is not the other
person's difficult decision, but rather, some decision that they have made
in the past that they still feel guilty over.

If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we can only
do the best we can at the time with the resources, knowledge and capacity we
have *at that time*. It does no good to second that decisision once its
made, only to be sure that we did the best we could *at the time* with what
we had. Once you know in your heart that the decision - whatever it was -
was the 'best' it could be at the time, then please do not let anyone else's
insecurity get to you. They weren't there, they weren't the person who had
to make the decision, and they will never *ever* know all of what was going
through your head & heart at the time.

Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from their
own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what they'll do if
asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they demanded of you. They
are cowards, always willing to play "Monday Morning Quarterbacks", but never
willing to get out there in the mud & muck themselves.

They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best, and do
not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it doesn't help them
any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many
pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have bones.


  #2  
Old March 23rd 08, 12:19 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
jmcquown[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 8,008
Default Real Life

Yowie wrote:
I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been
through the same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other
people are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our lives,
our relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality of the
people or pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would
have....." and go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but
really, we are in no position to truly understand and appreciate
*all* the factors that go into the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves,
that the other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not be
our own best, we may have made different choices had we been in the
same situation, but if we have any faith in each other at all, then
we need to support each other even though perhaps we would have done
things differently had we been presented with the same situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second
guessing themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able
to make a 'better' decision, even though there is no 'better'
decision to make. Those that make a person feel even guiltier for
doing the Right Thing are simply projecting their own fear and their
own guilt. They do not know the intimate details of the situation,
and are in no position to judge. And most tellingly, when asked to do
what they have just berated another person for *not* doing, they fall
oddly silent, knowing that in Reality, they are just as powerless to
stop Real Life and the tragedy that is part of it as anyone else.
What they are really railing against, it seems to me, is not the
other person's difficult decision, but rather, some decision that
they have made in the past that they still feel guilty over.
If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we can
only do the best we can at the time with the resources, knowledge and
capacity we have *at that time*. It does no good to second that
decisision once its made, only to be sure that we did the best we
could *at the time* with what we had. Once you know in your heart
that the decision - whatever it was - was the 'best' it could be at
the time, then please do not let anyone else's insecurity get to you.
They weren't there, they weren't the person who had to make the
decision, and they will never *ever* know all of what was going
through your head & heart at the time.
Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from
their own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what
they'll do if asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they
demanded of you. They are cowards, always willing to play "Monday
Morning Quarterbacks", but never willing to get out there in the mud
& muck themselves.
They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best,
and do not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it
doesn't help them any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie

I didn't snip a thing because you're right on target!

As you know, I just went through some difficult decisions concerning my
father. Mother was a wreck, having just gotten out of the hospital herself
and still not feeling well. One of my brothers was constantly questioning
and (albeit circumspectly) second-guessing everything. You think you can do
better YOU come down here and deal with it. Funny how he had to go on a
business trip instead.

Jill

  #3  
Old March 23rd 08, 12:21 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Granby
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 10,742
Default Real Life

Excellent post. I heard a saying once about not judging a man until you had
walked a mile in his shoes.
"Yowie" wrote in message
...
I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been through the
same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other
people are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our lives, our
relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality of the people or
pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would have....."
and go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but really, we are in no
position to truly understand and appreciate *all* the factors that go into
the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves, that
the other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not be our own
best, we may have made different choices had we been in the same
situation, but if we have any faith in each other at all, then we need to
support each other even though perhaps we would have done things
differently had we been presented with the same situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second guessing
themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able to make a
'better' decision, even though there is no 'better' decision to make.
Those that make a person feel even guiltier for doing the Right Thing are
simply projecting their own fear and their own guilt. They do not know the
intimate details of the situation, and are in no position to judge. And
most tellingly, when asked to do what they have just berated another
person for *not* doing, they fall oddly silent, knowing that in Reality,
they are just as powerless to stop Real Life and the tragedy that is part
of it as anyone else. What they are really railing against, it seems to
me, is not the other person's difficult decision, but rather, some
decision that they have made in the past that they still feel guilty over.

If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we can only
do the best we can at the time with the resources, knowledge and capacity
we have *at that time*. It does no good to second that decisision once its
made, only to be sure that we did the best we could *at the time* with
what we had. Once you know in your heart that the decision - whatever it
was - was the 'best' it could be at the time, then please do not let
anyone else's insecurity get to you. They weren't there, they weren't the
person who had to make the decision, and they will never *ever* know all
of what was going through your head & heart at the time.

Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from their
own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what they'll do
if asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they demanded of you.
They are cowards, always willing to play "Monday Morning Quarterbacks",
but never willing to get out there in the mud & muck themselves.

They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best, and do
not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it doesn't help them
any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many
pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have bones.



  #4  
Old March 23rd 08, 01:16 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Outsider
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,760
Default Real Life

"Yowie" wrote in
:

I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been through
the same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other
people are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our lives,
our relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality of the
people or pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would
have....." and go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but
really, we are in no position to truly understand and appreciate *all*
the factors that go into the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves,
that the other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not be
our own best, we may have made different choices had we been in the
same situation, but if we have any faith in each other at all, then we
need to support each other even though perhaps we would have done
things differently had we been presented with the same situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second
guessing themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able to
make a 'better' decision, even though there is no 'better' decision to
make. Those that make a person feel even guiltier for doing the Right
Thing are simply projecting their own fear and their own guilt. They
do not know the intimate details of the situation, and are in no
position to judge. And most tellingly, when asked to do what they have
just berated another person for *not* doing, they fall oddly silent,
knowing that in Reality, they are just as powerless to stop Real Life
and the tragedy that is part of it as anyone else. What they are
really railing against, it seems to me, is not the other person's
difficult decision, but rather, some decision that they have made in
the past that they still feel guilty over.

If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we can
only do the best we can at the time with the resources, knowledge and
capacity we have *at that time*. It does no good to second that
decisision once its made, only to be sure that we did the best we
could *at the time* with what we had. Once you know in your heart that
the decision - whatever it was - was the 'best' it could be at the
time, then please do not let anyone else's insecurity get to you. They
weren't there, they weren't the person who had to make the decision,
and they will never *ever* know all of what was going through your
head & heart at the time.

Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from
their own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what
they'll do if asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they
demanded of you. They are cowards, always willing to play "Monday
Morning Quarterbacks", but never willing to get out there in the mud &
muck themselves.

They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best, and
do not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it doesn't
help them any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie




Very well said.

As for guilt; I don't do it. I learn from my mistakes but I don't feel
guilty over them. I learned that almost two decades ago. If someone tries
to make me feel guilty it just seems funny to me. The odd thing is since I
dumped guilt I started making fewer mistakes. Go figure.

Andy

  #5  
Old March 23rd 08, 01:43 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
jmcquown[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 8,008
Default Real Life

Granby wrote:
Excellent post. I heard a saying once about not judging a man until
you had walked a mile in his shoes.

Especially when the shoes are a size too small

Jill

"Yowie" wrote in message
...
I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been
through the same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other
people are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our
lives, our relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality
of the people or pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would
have....." and go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but
really, we are in no position to truly understand and appreciate
*all* the factors that go into the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves,
that the other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not
be our own best, we may have made different choices had we been in
the same situation, but if we have any faith in each other at all,
then we need to support each other even though perhaps we would have
done things differently had we been presented with the same
situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second
guessing themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able
to make a 'better' decision, even though there is no 'better'
decision to make. Those that make a person feel even guiltier for
doing the Right Thing are simply projecting their own fear and their
own guilt. They do not know the intimate details of the situation,
and are in no position to judge. And most tellingly, when asked to
do what they have just berated another person for *not* doing, they
fall oddly silent, knowing that in Reality, they are just as
powerless to stop Real Life and the tragedy that is part of it as
anyone else. What they are really railing against, it seems to me,
is not the other person's difficult decision, but rather, some
decision that they have made in the past that they still feel guilty
over.

If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we
can only do the best we can at the time with the resources,
knowledge and capacity we have *at that time*. It does no good to
second that decisision once its made, only to be sure that we did
the best we could *at the time* with what we had. Once you know in
your heart that the decision - whatever it was - was the 'best' it
could be at the time, then please do not let anyone else's
insecurity get to you. They weren't there, they weren't the person
who had to make the decision, and they will never *ever* know all of
what was going through your head & heart at the time.

Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from
their own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what
they'll do if asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they
demanded of you. They are cowards, always willing to play "Monday
Morning Quarterbacks", but never willing to get out there in the mud
& muck themselves.

They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best,
and do not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it
doesn't help them any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how
many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have
bones.

  #6  
Old March 23rd 08, 03:11 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
CatNipped[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 4,003
Default Real Life

"Yowie" wrote in message
...
I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been through the
same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other
people are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our lives, our
relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality of the people or
pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would have....."
and go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but really, we are in no
position to truly understand and appreciate *all* the factors that go into
the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves, that
the other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not be our own
best, we may have made different choices had we been in the same
situation, but if we have any faith in each other at all, then we need to
support each other even though perhaps we would have done things
differently had we been presented with the same situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second guessing
themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able to make a
'better' decision, even though there is no 'better' decision to make.
Those that make a person feel even guiltier for doing the Right Thing are
simply projecting their own fear and their own guilt. They do not know the
intimate details of the situation, and are in no position to judge. And
most tellingly, when asked to do what they have just berated another
person for *not* doing, they fall oddly silent, knowing that in Reality,
they are just as powerless to stop Real Life and the tragedy that is part
of it as anyone else. What they are really railing against, it seems to
me, is not the other person's difficult decision, but rather, some
decision that they have made in the past that they still feel guilty over.

If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we can only
do the best we can at the time with the resources, knowledge and capacity
we have *at that time*. It does no good to second that decisision once its
made, only to be sure that we did the best we could *at the time* with
what we had. Once you know in your heart that the decision - whatever it
was - was the 'best' it could be at the time, then please do not let
anyone else's insecurity get to you. They weren't there, they weren't the
person who had to make the decision, and they will never *ever* know all
of what was going through your head & heart at the time.

Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from their
own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what they'll do
if asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they demanded of you.
They are cowards, always willing to play "Monday Morning Quarterbacks",
but never willing to get out there in the mud & muck themselves.

They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best, and do
not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it doesn't help them
any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many
pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have bones.


Well said, Yowie. This sort of reminds me of a prejudice out there most
people aren't even aware of. When I was working at Amoco I happened to walk
past an open office door and heard two senior analysts talking about a
co-worker whom I knew quite well. One of the "yuppies" said, very snidely,
"Well if she wanted a better job she should have gone to a better college!"
I couldn't help myself, I stopped, turned around and asked nicely, "What
college did you go to, X?" "Well Prestigious College 3" she said. "And who
paid your tuition?" I asked. "My family," she said, seeming a bit flustered
at that point. "How fortunate for you," I said and continued on my way. I
didn't even bother to tell them that my friend's mom cleaned houses for a
living, as did her mother before her. My friend worked two jobs while she
was at school and was still paying off a college loan 6 years after she
graduated her non-prestigious college.

When people have money, they have NO idea what it's like to live from
paycheck to paycheck knowing that one unexpected expense could cause
disaster.

Hugs,

CatNipped


  #7  
Old March 23rd 08, 03:48 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Stormmee
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 12,281
Default Real Life

standing and cheering, Lee
Yowie wrote in message
...
I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been through the
same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other

people
are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our lives, our
relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality of the people or
pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would have....."

and
go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but really, we are in no
position to truly understand and appreciate *all* the factors that go into
the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves, that

the
other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not be our own best,
we may have made different choices had we been in the same situation, but

if
we have any faith in each other at all, then we need to support each other
even though perhaps we would have done things differently had we been
presented with the same situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second guessing
themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able to make a
'better' decision, even though there is no 'better' decision to make.

Those
that make a person feel even guiltier for doing the Right Thing are simply
projecting their own fear and their own guilt. They do not know the

intimate
details of the situation, and are in no position to judge. And most
tellingly, when asked to do what they have just berated another person for
*not* doing, they fall oddly silent, knowing that in Reality, they are

just
as powerless to stop Real Life and the tragedy that is part of it as

anyone
else. What they are really railing against, it seems to me, is not the

other
person's difficult decision, but rather, some decision that they have made
in the past that they still feel guilty over.

If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we can only
do the best we can at the time with the resources, knowledge and capacity

we
have *at that time*. It does no good to second that decisision once its
made, only to be sure that we did the best we could *at the time* with

what
we had. Once you know in your heart that the decision - whatever it was -
was the 'best' it could be at the time, then please do not let anyone

else's
insecurity get to you. They weren't there, they weren't the person who had
to make the decision, and they will never *ever* know all of what was

going
through your head & heart at the time.

Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from their
own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what they'll do

if
asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they demanded of you. They
are cowards, always willing to play "Monday Morning Quarterbacks", but

never
willing to get out there in the mud & muck themselves.

They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best, and do
not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it doesn't help them
any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many
pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have bones.




  #8  
Old March 23rd 08, 04:38 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Bettina
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 487
Default Real Life

On 23 Mrz., 11:52, "Yowie" wrote:
I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been through the
same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other people
are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our lives, our
relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality of the people or
pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would have....." and
go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but really, we are in no
position to truly understand and appreciate *all* the factors that go into
the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves, that the
other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not be our own best,
we may have made different choices had we been in the same situation, but if
we have any faith in each other at all, then we need to support each other
even though perhaps we would have done things differently had we been
presented with the same situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second guessing
themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able to make a
'better' decision, even though there is no 'better' decision to make. Those
that make a person feel even guiltier for doing the Right Thing are simply
projecting their own fear and their own guilt. They do not know the intimate
details of the situation, and are in no position to judge. And most
tellingly, when asked to do what they have just berated another person for
*not* doing, they fall oddly silent, knowing that in Reality, they are just
as powerless to stop Real Life and the tragedy that is part of it as anyone
else. What they are really railing against, it seems to me, is not the other
person's difficult decision, but rather, some decision that they have made
in the past that they still feel guilty over.

If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we can only
do the best we can at the time with the resources, knowledge and capacity we
have *at that time*. It does no good to second that decisision once its
made, only to be sure that we did the best we could *at the time* with what
we had. Once you know in your heart that the decision - whatever it was -
was the 'best' it could be at the time, then please do not let anyone else's
insecurity get to you. They weren't there, they weren't the person who had
to make the decision, and they will never *ever* know all of what was going
through your head & heart at the time.

Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from their
own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what they'll do if
asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they demanded of you. They
are cowards, always willing to play "Monday Morning Quarterbacks", but never
willing to get out there in the mud & muck themselves.

They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best, and do
not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it doesn't help them
any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many
pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have bones.


How very well put. It was about time someone stated that here.

love
Bettina
  #9  
Old March 23rd 08, 04:48 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Lesley
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3,700
Default Real Life

On Mar 23, 7:11*am, "CatNipped" wrote:

When people have money, they have NO idea what it's like to live from
paycheck to paycheck knowing that one unexpected expense could cause
disaster.

It's like Jim the Gardener was saying the other week about two mutual
friends one of whom is well off and the other has well off parents
"They just texted me saying to keep some money back and go out with
them tonight. It never occurs to them that I have no money to keep
back in the first place!"

Lesley

Slave of the Fabulous Furballs

  #10  
Old March 23rd 08, 05:51 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Jo Firey
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,579
Default Real Life

Excuse the top post.

I don't know why "Yowie" that once in a while you kind of surprise me with
such a caring and well thought out post as this. Somehow I view you as
racing madly through life keeping up with you spouse and the Yowlet and the
furkids as well as work. I know that you are also a scientist with a gift
for sharing your knowledge in a way others can understand.

But you are also one of the good people here who take the time and care so
much about how others are able to deal with their lives as well.

Thank you just for being you. A pretty all around terrific person.

Jo

"Yowie" wrote in message
...
I'm thinking of Charleen especially here, but others have been through the
same thing, and I also speak from experience myself.

As much as we share on this here NG and other electronic media, other
people are not privvy to the minutaie of the situation, or our lives, our
relationships with our cats, and indeed, the personality of the people or
pets themselves.

It is easy to say "well, if I was in that situation, I would have....."
and go on to criticise a friend's tough decision, but really, we are in no
position to truly understand and appreciate *all* the factors that go into
the decision.

We can only trust, knowing each other as we do, that as catslaves, that
the other is doing their own best as they see fit. It may not be our own
best, we may have made different choices had we been in the same
situation, but if we have any faith in each other at all, then we need to
support each other even though perhaps we would have done things
differently had we been presented with the same situation.

Anyone who has made a heartbreaking decision is already second guessing
themselves, is already feeling guilty about not being able to make a
'better' decision, even though there is no 'better' decision to make.
Those that make a person feel even guiltier for doing the Right Thing are
simply projecting their own fear and their own guilt. They do not know the
intimate details of the situation, and are in no position to judge. And
most tellingly, when asked to do what they have just berated another
person for *not* doing, they fall oddly silent, knowing that in Reality,
they are just as powerless to stop Real Life and the tragedy that is part
of it as anyone else. What they are really railing against, it seems to
me, is not the other person's difficult decision, but rather, some
decision that they have made in the past that they still feel guilty over.

If ever in a sitiatuon where a difficult decision is required, we can only
do the best we can at the time with the resources, knowledge and capacity
we have *at that time*. It does no good to second that decisision once its
made, only to be sure that we did the best we could *at the time* with
what we had. Once you know in your heart that the decision - whatever it
was - was the 'best' it could be at the time, then please do not let
anyone else's insecurity get to you. They weren't there, they weren't the
person who had to make the decision, and they will never *ever* know all
of what was going through your head & heart at the time.

Their self righteous blathering is just a way for them to hide from their
own guilt. It means less than nothing, and thats exactly what they'll do
if asked to 'step up' and actually do what it was they demanded of you.
They are cowards, always willing to play "Monday Morning Quarterbacks",
but never willing to get out there in the mud & muck themselves.

They are not worthy of our attention. Know that you did your best, and do
not allow others to share their own guilt with you - it doesn't help them
any, and it certainly doesn't help you.

Hugs

Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many
pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have bones.



 




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