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I ain't feeling merry yet...(long)



 
 
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  #51  
Old December 7th 04, 10:19 PM
Christina Websell
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"Adrian" wrote in message
...
Singh wrote:
Adrian wrote:

Hugs and purrs, Baha. This is the most difficult time of year for
many of us, December 12th will be the 5th aniversary of my little
brother's suicide. I think about him every day. I didn't have a car
at the time so I had to ask my neighbour, who was also my best
friend, to take me to my brother's house. That was the last time I
saw him, he died three days later. His funeral was the same day as
my brother's. I wish I could hibernate until spring.


I hope you'll be able to feel the big fat hug I'm sending you through
the ethers, Adrian. I can not begin to imagine how you must feel. I
just hope that, someday, it will be better.


Thank you, Baha. Some days are better than others, it's bright and sunny
today, the cats are happy. Today is a better day. I know people have
suffered as much and more than me and can still be happy, so I know
there's hope.
--
Adrian (Owned by Snoopy & Bagheera)
A house is not a home, without a cat.


I really do know what you feel, Adrian. My sudden
close-family-completely-unexpected bereavement nearly destroyed me. I
thought I could cope with it, but then I got clinical depression. How
stupid I was to think I could carry on, regardless. I really did think I
could.
I couldn't. I don't think anyone can. At the same time I was having
problems at work, through bullying by a manager, who thought my performance
had decreased since my bereavement. Oh, I wonder why!!
Then my eye ops put the top hat on it. Even more useless as an employee. I
wondered how I'd earn a living for my cats, chickens, geese and myself. I
thought about what it might be like to have to rehome all my animals and
became even more depressed. How would Boyfriend manage in a new home?
Simple answer, he wouldn't, he is far too shy and it would freak him out.
Kitty would manage fine, she is a scritch tart. She forced herself on two
young schoolgirls a while ago just across the road, when I was weeding in
the front garden.
I had my eye on her. Oh, she was claiming to be lost and needed lots of
strokes and scritches which they did for an hour or two.
One of the little girls came across to me and said "Have you any idea who
this cat belongs to?" That's what a good case Kitty had made to say she was
absolutely homeless and needed comfort.
I told her she was mine. "Kitty" I said, "come back across this road and
get in your own house.."

She slunk a bit, you know. Right across the road and into the house, she
slunk back. I had discovered her lies and she knew it.
Lol! I have the measure of this tuxedo girl!
She makes me laugh.

Tweed





  #52  
Old December 8th 04, 03:07 AM
Stormin Mormon
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Thanks, y'all. You're good people, every last one of you, and many thanks
for helping me buck up.
CY: I wonder some times about folks who are not cat owned. Never trust one.
(smile here; folks out there, the reason this is funny is that *I*, little
ol' Stormy isn't cat owned. We now return you to your regularly scheduled
message.)


Louie and I went to see James yesterday at the ICU. I know now that worry
for him was a huge part of my problem. James doesn't have a lot of friends.
He's a brilliant man with an IQ of around 170, and he'll never be able to
hold down a job.
CY: I did meet James, once. He is a very polite and gentle man, the few
minutes I did meet him. I didn't get much of a sense of his personality, but
would like to get to know him better.

He went on a missionary trip to Russia, taking a break from
grad school (astrophysics) and caught some exotic parasite that was
threatening to kill him. The only drug with any hope of working was a
neurotoxin that would either cure him or kill him, and he and his family
decided to take the chance. Now James has a condition that resembles
schizophrenia, and seizure disorder. he is still brilliant in science, but
his neurons don't know how to dance together any more.
CY: Yes, tragic.


His bright periods in
life come from church, the science fiction club he and Louie and I belong
to, and Doctor Who videos provided by my husband.
CY: I forgot if you mentioned which church? And Dr. Who videos of all
things...


People don't understand
why James isn't quite right, and shy away from him even though he wouldn't
slap a mosquito for love of living beings.
CY: I can imagine that.


He'd finally come out of the stupor he was in for over a week. When he saw
us, he tried to sit up but was too weakened; still, he showed that he's got
a fire under his ass and we couldn't be happier. He has fight in him now,
and he's frustrated as hell because he can't speak with the tracheostomy.
CY: Bring him a pen and paper. Either that, or ask him yes or no questions
so he can nod yes or no.


I'm just glad he's working harder to breathe on his own and that he wants to
move and get out of there. The doctors expect he'll be there a good month
yet, but he's healing and I am profoundly thankful. Louie and I plan to give
him a big party at the next club meeting that he's healthy enough to get to.
CY: Sounds encouraging. maybe when I'm out to visit on Friday we can go
visit and offer him a priesthood blessing.



Joycie is also fighting like hell. Out of the hospital, her white cells at a
more reasonable level, she's busting her chops to toughen up and her hair is
starting to come back in. Never thought that would happen while on chemo.
She's got a kind of GI Jane look that her boys tease her about.
CY: Hey, raw grit is good in any form.

The doctors
still don't know the long-term prognosis; either that, or Randy is lying
through his teeth in an effort to keep the atmosphere positive. To distract
Joycie from all this, Louie and I found quite possibly the nastiest jigsaw
puzzle in the world, shaped like an orca and having absolutely no straight
border as a reference! That should keep her going for a good long time, and
I expect some good, healthy swearing.
CY: Ah, you are diabolical.


And little ol' me? I went and got some stuff for the Marines to pass out to
kids for Christmas, and my next toy will be a Nerf bat so the next time I
feel like hell, I can bash something without causing harm.
CY: Sounds like your husband is in trouble?


The therapist at
the Jewish Center sugested I get one of those bopping bags like you get
kids, you punch them and they bounce back upright, and whip it with a Nerf
bat. I'll get the little bugger a blond wig and glasses so it'll look like
my boss.
CY: Just so long as you don't get it a male pattern baldness, and a pocket
full of pens. Then I'll have to wear my helmet when I come over and visit.


And if I don't get the Rolls Royce and world peace that I ask for
every year, I'll put a Santa hat on it!
CY: And a voice box that goes "Ho, ho, ho".


Am I sounding like myself again?
CY: One of your best features. figure out who is ****ing you off, and go
kill him.


Thanks for putting up with my holiday yuckies!
CY: Sounds good. today actually ahd work. Wednesday I'l be chasing around,
and Thurs oughta be more work. I'm fighting to keep Friday free.

Blessed be,
Baha


  #53  
Old December 8th 04, 03:30 AM
Seanette Blaylock
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"Stormin Mormon" had some very
interesting things to say about Merrier (with some additions):

CY: I wonder some times about folks who are not cat owned. Never trust one.
(smile here; folks out there, the reason this is funny is that *I*, little
ol' Stormy isn't cat owned. We now return you to your regularly scheduled
message.)


I'm sure someone at your friendly animal shelter would be happy to
claim you. :-)

--
"The universe is quite robust in design and appears to be
doing just fine on its own, incompetent support staff notwithstanding.
:-)" - the Dennis formerly known as (evil), MCFL
  #54  
Old December 26th 04, 01:09 PM
Jean Hobbs
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Baha, I'm sorry I have just seen this answer to a letter, because Its just
taken meover half an hour to scroll down to Dec; 6th and I can't do that
every night
When Phil {son} comes tomorrow toput my new work-station together
I'll get him todelete up to Dec; I dont know how you all keep up to the new
messages, but thank you for your answer and I hope you are feeling much
better now Hugs Jean.
Singh wrote in message
...


Jean Hobbs wrote:

Oh Baha,after reading your letter I realise how inconsequential I am,


Bullpucky. You are not inconsequential!


we were always poor, but we were always loved and never abused,
I was always happy, I'm sitting here wondering why some people
have such a hard life, and others dont, and I feel so bad for you.
I hope and pray that for the rest of your life nothing bad will ever

happen
to you again, most of the children I've fostered, have had a bad start

in
life
and I know how bad it can affect the lives of those who suffer
abuse,cruelty, or even neglect.


How can one be inconsequential when one gives a new start to a living

being who
may have descended into a worse fate but for you?

Wilson and I are sending 'be happy' Purrs
and lots of
big Hugs to you with love and blessings


Thanks. I think it's working because I'm starting to regain my backbone.

Purrs,
and rest...lots of rest!

Blessed be,
Baha



 




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