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Pity Party for 1



 
 
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  #1  
Old January 15th 09, 06:19 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Yowie
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Posts: 3,225
Default Pity Party for 1

"These damn cats! I am sick of them" Joel shouted as one -in the middle of a
greebling run - used his bare chest as a short cut between the lounge and
the kitchen, leaving 'traction' marks from the back claws. "That one," as he
pointed to Suki who was in the middle of one of her numerous 'gravity
testing' experiments, "is so damn dense lead would float in her brain."

"But she's so pretty and fluffy and she lurrrves you", I replied.

"And that one," he continued to rave, completley oblivious to my comment,
"That one is so bloody neurotic that even if she *mainlined* Prozac she'd
still be paranoid". Shadow stayed hiding under the table, and hissed at
Pickle.

He had clearly launched into a Rant. I didn't interrupt.

"And don't even get me *started* on that b*st*rd," he gesticulated wildly in
Pickle's direction "That one is the cause of all the trouble - he razzes up
the stupid one and makes the other one so paranoid that she picks on the
stupid one until they all go mental on *me* while he looks all innocent.
Y'think those two are the evil ones but its all *his* fault."

I just muttered a very no commital "Mmm"

"Cats!" he declared in disgust, "I've had enough of all of them."

"We aren't going to get rid of any of them." It was a statement, not an
argument. I had begun to channel the spirit of the Mamabear.

He finsihed his rant with the declaration "They're just like bloody
children!"

Joel looked at me, waiting for a response. He was dissapointed. All he got
was *the look* that Mamabears give when there is *nothing* to "discuss".

"They are just like bloody children," he reiterated more softly. With the
steam no longer blowing quite so hard out of his ears, he continued in
slightly more apologetic tones "I love 'em, but *damn* they drive me batsh*t
mental somedays."

I nodded.

"Shmogg was *never* like this".

"No," I agreed simply.

Having come to the end of his 'steam', Joel scooped up his own personal lap
fungus (Suki) and sat down in front of his computer. Suki stretched out
luxuriously, knowing that Joel being at his computer meant a long period of
lap occupation with absent-minded scritching. Joel obliged, of course. I
don't think he even knows that he said it audibly, but just before he
started to let out the rest of his tension on Command and Conquer, he
murmered to himself "Damn I miss that cat".

So do I, my love, so do I.

Yowie
--
"because its more fun to be evil" - Jarppi, _The Dudesons_


  #2  
Old January 15th 09, 09:28 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
Jofirey
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 2,628
Default Pity Party for 1


"Yowie" wrote in message
...
"These damn cats! I am sick of them" Joel shouted as one -in the
middle of a greebling run - used his bare chest as a short cut
between the lounge and the kitchen, leaving 'traction' marks from
the back claws. "That one," as he pointed to Suki who was in the
middle of one of her numerous 'gravity testing' experiments, "is so
damn dense lead would float in her brain."

"But she's so pretty and fluffy and she lurrrves you", I replied.

"And that one," he continued to rave, completley oblivious to my
comment, "That one is so bloody neurotic that even if she
*mainlined* Prozac she'd still be paranoid". Shadow stayed hiding
under the table, and hissed at Pickle.

He had clearly launched into a Rant. I didn't interrupt.

"And don't even get me *started* on that b*st*rd," he gesticulated
wildly in Pickle's direction "That one is the cause of all the
trouble - he razzes up the stupid one and makes the other one so
paranoid that she picks on the stupid one until they all go mental
on *me* while he looks all innocent. Y'think those two are the evil
ones but its all *his* fault."

I just muttered a very no commital "Mmm"

"Cats!" he declared in disgust, "I've had enough of all of them."

"We aren't going to get rid of any of them." It was a statement, not
an argument. I had begun to channel the spirit of the Mamabear.

He finsihed his rant with the declaration "They're just like bloody
children!"

Joel looked at me, waiting for a response. He was dissapointed. All
he got was *the look* that Mamabears give when there is *nothing* to
"discuss".

"They are just like bloody children," he reiterated more softly.
With the steam no longer blowing quite so hard out of his ears, he
continued in slightly more apologetic tones "I love 'em, but *damn*
they drive me batsh*t mental somedays."

I nodded.

"Shmogg was *never* like this".

"No," I agreed simply.

Having come to the end of his 'steam', Joel scooped up his own
personal lap fungus (Suki) and sat down in front of his computer.
Suki stretched out luxuriously, knowing that Joel being at his
computer meant a long period of lap occupation with absent-minded
scritching. Joel obliged, of course. I don't think he even knows
that he said it audibly, but just before he started to let out the
rest of his tension on Command and Conquer, he murmered to himself
"Damn I miss that cat".

So do I, my love, so do I.

Charlie get frustrated like that with Kayla. It does not pay to try
to get the best of a BC mentally. You might or might not be smarter
but their powers of concentration are legendary.

So a few times Charlie hollered at Kay for getting into the trash, of
tearing something up or peeing on the bathmat.

He spends a lot of time in out bedroom watching TV. Everytime he
makes a move to come out to the kitchen or into the rest of the house,
Kayla stops whatever she is doing and goes and lies on her rug behind
the recliner. This makes him feel awful. I mean he's about the
softest touch any animal ever met. She know this. Its the only
reason she does it.

Once she's made her point, then she's all over him looking for play
and treats, etc.

(I told him you don't yell at border collies, but he didn't listen)

Jo


 




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