Advice Please....

"Helen Miles" wrote in message
news:449ca50e9802288a04f0097415371c66.76411@mygate .mailgate.org...
Dear All,

I need advice. I am well ****ed off with next doors
Jack-Russell-from-hell. The Fracking thing keeps yapping & barking
and
disturbing my nap. To add insult to injury, the ******* chased me
twice
this morning when I was out doing my rounds. I of course smacked it
in
the head with all my claws out and then chased it, but even so, it's
not
what you want to do when you're taking your constitutional. Pandora
is
so worried by it, she hasn't even gone out today and she likes to
lie in
the sun on the patio.

It won't stop barking, so the human has offered to climb over the
fence
and wack it with the garden spade, but I would prefer something more
effective and long term. Like bowel dismemberment. That'd shut the
bugger up.

All advice appreciated.

Most miffed,

His Royal Feline Lordship Tiger.


Bribe him with doggie biscuits and he'll be your best friend-
Alison

Adrian wrote:
Kreisleriana wrote:
On Mon, 01 Aug 2005 12:22:35 -0400, Karen AKA Kajikit
yodeled:

On Mon, 1 Aug 2005 14:45:32 +0000 (UTC), "Helen Miles"
wrote:

Dear All,

I need advice. I am well ****ed off with next doors
Jack-Russell-from-hell. The Fracking thing keeps yapping & barking
and disturbing my nap. To add insult to injury, the ******* chased
me twice this morning when I was out doing my rounds. I of course
smacked it in the head with all my claws out and then chased it,
but even so, it's not what you want to do when you're taking your
constitutional. Pandora is so worried by it, she hasn't even gone
out today and she likes to lie in the sun on the patio.

It won't stop barking, so the human has offered to climb over the
fence and wack it with the garden spade, but I would prefer
something more effective and long term. Like bowel dismemberment.
That'd shut the bugger up.

Next time lurk up someplace high and then jump down on the
ratcreature with all claws at full extension... that ought to teach
it to leave you alone!

I know Jack russells are adorable dogs

They are the spawn of Satan.

They're not called Jack Russell terrorists for nothing. ;-)

I'm still reminded of the art show we were working when I went off to use
the loo (porta-potties, dammit!). Walking back I encountered a couple who
had just bought two Jack Russell pups from one of the exhibitors (no, she
wasn't selling pups, just happened to have 2 of her dogs babies there).
They were about 10-12 weeks old. They were already getting into mischief.
One had found a walnut and was chewing on it; his brother kept jumping on
his head. And this couple thought they were soooo cute. Uh huh. Okay,
they were adorable. But two at once? Hahahahaha!

Jill

Helen Miles @

I need advice. I am well ****ed off with next doors
Jack-Russell-from-hell. The Fracking thing keeps yapping & barking and

Instruct your human to call the neighbors and tell them they have a "Public
Nuisance". If the owners fail to correct things, tell your human to carry a
can of pepper spray whenever in the yard, and to spray the obnoxious mutt
every time it barks.

Duke of URL wrote:
Helen Miles @

I need advice. I am well ****ed off with next doors
Jack-Russell-from-hell. The Fracking thing keeps yapping & barking
and

Instruct your human to call the neighbors and tell them they have a
"Public Nuisance". If the owners fail to correct things, tell your
human to carry a can of pepper spray whenever in the yard, and to
spray the obnoxious mutt every time it barks.

Possesion of pepper spray is illegal where Helen lives, and I'm sure she
wouldn't use on an animal even if she could.
--
Adrian (Owned by Snoopy & Bagheera)
A house is not a home, without a cat.