5 y.o. female getting along with 5 m.o. female - complications?

Karen Chuplis wrote:

It depends on how agressive they are acting. Is it real fighting?

Karen

The playing/fighting usually lasts about 5 seconds - Luna (the kitten, who
weighs 5 lbs) always initiates it (Golddust, the older cat, who weighs
11 lbs, has started it about .5% of the time), and it usually is Luna
going up to Golddust and trying to grab her around the neck from either
the bottom or top, and then Golddust whacks her and hisses and yelps one
time, then runs off. So it's not really much of an incident.

According to the chart at:

http://www.feline-behavior.com/html/cats_cats.html

Vocalizations: Golddust is the only one that vocalizes and they're
usually just hissing or yelping once.

Injuries: No injuries to either cat.

Avoidance: They hang out in the same rooms, eat at bowls about a foot
apart at the same time, used to sleep in the same room and use the same
litterbox (currently Golddust is separated in another room 'cos of the
cystitis), and Golddust will watch Luna play and sometimes engage in play
at the same time (but not with Luna, just with another string or
something).

Roles: Neither seem to really be either on the offensive or defensive -
Luna will arch up with her tail fluffed (but in kittens, I've read that
that's a sign of play, not aggressiveness?) sometimes, but not often
anymore. Golddust just lays around watching Luna and they walk by each
other most of the time without incident.

Friendliness: See the above info - they seem to tolerate each other, but
not real friendly.

Initiation: Luna pretty much always starts it. Of course, once Golddust
gets over her cystitis, she might want to start playing again, but who
knows.

So based on the above, I don't think it's real fighting, but it's not
totally play either.

Thanks for reading.

brian
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Chris wrote:
Well, I don't think the clawing/declawing is the issue. I agree it sounds
like kitten behavior. I don't know where your vet gets its ideas but I have
one female who has 'mothered' every kitten that came after her (3).

Yeah, I know that there are thousands (if not tens of thousands or
millions) of people out there that have an older female cat that has had a
female kitten introduced and gotten along. I'm thinking it may just be
the personalities/traits of these specific cats.

It takes a while for them to settle in & I absolutely would not worry
about accidental scratches.

My wife and I were in a difference of opinion here - I thought that if
the kitten injured the older one, it would be pretty minor the first time
or two, then if the kitten really did get aggressive, it would get worse.
My wife seemed to think it would be a fairly major injury first time out
(either accidentally caused or instinctively caused).

Even declawed cats pack quite a wallop when a little
one really starts anoying them.

Yeah, the older cat is 11 lbs and the kitten's about 5 lbs, so the older
one really could whack (or sit on) the kitten fairly well if she got
****ed off enough.

And the fact that they sleep in the same
room, etc. just tells you that the big one is NOT afraid of the little guy.
Just give it some time & don't worry--you know they really do work it out
out in their own way!

That's kind of what I was thinking, but my wife's and my opinions are so
differing that it's too damn stressful to have to deal with this whole
thing every time something goes the tiniest bit awry with the cats.

Thanks for the post.

brian
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If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Chris wrote:
Well, I don't think the clawing/declawing is the issue. I agree it sounds
like kitten behavior. I don't know where your vet gets its ideas but I have
one female who has 'mothered' every kitten that came after her (3).

Yeah, I know that there are thousands (if not tens of thousands or
millions) of people out there that have an older female cat that has had a
female kitten introduced and gotten along. I'm thinking it may just be
the personalities/traits of these specific cats.

It takes a while for them to settle in & I absolutely would not worry
about accidental scratches.

My wife and I were in a difference of opinion here - I thought that if
the kitten injured the older one, it would be pretty minor the first time
or two, then if the kitten really did get aggressive, it would get worse.
My wife seemed to think it would be a fairly major injury first time out
(either accidentally caused or instinctively caused).

Even declawed cats pack quite a wallop when a little
one really starts anoying them.

Yeah, the older cat is 11 lbs and the kitten's about 5 lbs, so the older
one really could whack (or sit on) the kitten fairly well if she got
****ed off enough.

And the fact that they sleep in the same
room, etc. just tells you that the big one is NOT afraid of the little guy.
Just give it some time & don't worry--you know they really do work it out
out in their own way!

That's kind of what I was thinking, but my wife's and my opinions are so
differing that it's too damn stressful to have to deal with this whole
thing every time something goes the tiniest bit awry with the cats.

Thanks for the post.

brian
--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Chris wrote:
Well, I don't think the clawing/declawing is the issue. I agree it sounds
like kitten behavior. I don't know where your vet gets its ideas but I have
one female who has 'mothered' every kitten that came after her (3).

Yeah, I know that there are thousands (if not tens of thousands or
millions) of people out there that have an older female cat that has had a
female kitten introduced and gotten along. I'm thinking it may just be
the personalities/traits of these specific cats.

It takes a while for them to settle in & I absolutely would not worry
about accidental scratches.

My wife and I were in a difference of opinion here - I thought that if
the kitten injured the older one, it would be pretty minor the first time
or two, then if the kitten really did get aggressive, it would get worse.
My wife seemed to think it would be a fairly major injury first time out
(either accidentally caused or instinctively caused).

Even declawed cats pack quite a wallop when a little
one really starts anoying them.

Yeah, the older cat is 11 lbs and the kitten's about 5 lbs, so the older
one really could whack (or sit on) the kitten fairly well if she got
****ed off enough.

And the fact that they sleep in the same
room, etc. just tells you that the big one is NOT afraid of the little guy.
Just give it some time & don't worry--you know they really do work it out
out in their own way!

That's kind of what I was thinking, but my wife's and my opinions are so
differing that it's too damn stressful to have to deal with this whole
thing every time something goes the tiniest bit awry with the cats.

Thanks for the post.

brian
--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Sounds pretty normal for this stage. I wouldn't worry.

Karen

"Brian or Sharon Beuchaw" wrote in message
...
Karen Chuplis wrote:

It depends on how agressive they are acting. Is it real fighting?

Karen

The playing/fighting usually lasts about 5 seconds - Luna (the kitten, who
weighs 5 lbs) always initiates it (Golddust, the older cat, who weighs
11 lbs, has started it about .5% of the time), and it usually is Luna
going up to Golddust and trying to grab her around the neck from either
the bottom or top, and then Golddust whacks her and hisses and yelps one
time, then runs off. So it's not really much of an incident.

According to the chart at:

http://www.feline-behavior.com/html/cats_cats.html

Vocalizations: Golddust is the only one that vocalizes and they're
usually just hissing or yelping once.

Injuries: No injuries to either cat.

Avoidance: They hang out in the same rooms, eat at bowls about a foot
apart at the same time, used to sleep in the same room and use the same
litterbox (currently Golddust is separated in another room 'cos of the
cystitis), and Golddust will watch Luna play and sometimes engage in play
at the same time (but not with Luna, just with another string or
something).

Roles: Neither seem to really be either on the offensive or defensive -
Luna will arch up with her tail fluffed (but in kittens, I've read that
that's a sign of play, not aggressiveness?) sometimes, but not often
anymore. Golddust just lays around watching Luna and they walk by each
other most of the time without incident.

Friendliness: See the above info - they seem to tolerate each other, but
not real friendly.

Initiation: Luna pretty much always starts it. Of course, once Golddust
gets over her cystitis, she might want to start playing again, but who
knows.

So based on the above, I don't think it's real fighting, but it's not
totally play either.

Thanks for reading.

brian
--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Sounds pretty normal for this stage. I wouldn't worry.

Karen

"Brian or Sharon Beuchaw" wrote in message
...
Karen Chuplis wrote:

It depends on how agressive they are acting. Is it real fighting?

Karen

The playing/fighting usually lasts about 5 seconds - Luna (the kitten, who
weighs 5 lbs) always initiates it (Golddust, the older cat, who weighs
11 lbs, has started it about .5% of the time), and it usually is Luna
going up to Golddust and trying to grab her around the neck from either
the bottom or top, and then Golddust whacks her and hisses and yelps one
time, then runs off. So it's not really much of an incident.

According to the chart at:

http://www.feline-behavior.com/html/cats_cats.html

Vocalizations: Golddust is the only one that vocalizes and they're
usually just hissing or yelping once.

Injuries: No injuries to either cat.

Avoidance: They hang out in the same rooms, eat at bowls about a foot
apart at the same time, used to sleep in the same room and use the same
litterbox (currently Golddust is separated in another room 'cos of the
cystitis), and Golddust will watch Luna play and sometimes engage in play
at the same time (but not with Luna, just with another string or
something).

Roles: Neither seem to really be either on the offensive or defensive -
Luna will arch up with her tail fluffed (but in kittens, I've read that
that's a sign of play, not aggressiveness?) sometimes, but not often
anymore. Golddust just lays around watching Luna and they walk by each
other most of the time without incident.

Friendliness: See the above info - they seem to tolerate each other, but
not real friendly.

Initiation: Luna pretty much always starts it. Of course, once Golddust
gets over her cystitis, she might want to start playing again, but who
knows.

So based on the above, I don't think it's real fighting, but it's not
totally play either.

Thanks for reading.

brian
--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Sounds pretty normal for this stage. I wouldn't worry.

Karen

"Brian or Sharon Beuchaw" wrote in message
...
Karen Chuplis wrote:

It depends on how agressive they are acting. Is it real fighting?

Karen

The playing/fighting usually lasts about 5 seconds - Luna (the kitten, who
weighs 5 lbs) always initiates it (Golddust, the older cat, who weighs
11 lbs, has started it about .5% of the time), and it usually is Luna
going up to Golddust and trying to grab her around the neck from either
the bottom or top, and then Golddust whacks her and hisses and yelps one
time, then runs off. So it's not really much of an incident.

According to the chart at:

http://www.feline-behavior.com/html/cats_cats.html

Vocalizations: Golddust is the only one that vocalizes and they're
usually just hissing or yelping once.

Injuries: No injuries to either cat.

Avoidance: They hang out in the same rooms, eat at bowls about a foot
apart at the same time, used to sleep in the same room and use the same
litterbox (currently Golddust is separated in another room 'cos of the
cystitis), and Golddust will watch Luna play and sometimes engage in play
at the same time (but not with Luna, just with another string or
something).

Roles: Neither seem to really be either on the offensive or defensive -
Luna will arch up with her tail fluffed (but in kittens, I've read that
that's a sign of play, not aggressiveness?) sometimes, but not often
anymore. Golddust just lays around watching Luna and they walk by each
other most of the time without incident.

Friendliness: See the above info - they seem to tolerate each other, but
not real friendly.

Initiation: Luna pretty much always starts it. Of course, once Golddust
gets over her cystitis, she might want to start playing again, but who
knows.

So based on the above, I don't think it's real fighting, but it's not
totally play either.

Thanks for reading.

brian
--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Hi,

Sharon here. First of all, thanks for your concern. There have been
some things I think Brian has not noticed as much as I have. The older cat
seemed depressed after we brought the Luna in (wouldn't play, hid and
slept all day). Also, as Luna grew more comfortable in her new
environment, she became more aggressive and Golddust became reluctant to
go into the room with her at night to sleep. (Golddust has always put
herself to bed at night, or else Mommy might carry her and kiss her, and
she doesn't like that!) Also, one day Golddust followed me to the door as
I was leaving for work and sat on my purse, as if she didn't want me to
leave. We have had her five years and she has never behaved like that.
Then I noticed that the kitten would run up and start drinking water if
Golddust was drinking water, and Golddust would stop drinking. Same thing
with food. And whenever Golddust would come into the living from her
hiding place to hang with us, Luna would attack her. Golddust seemed
pretty shaken after these little encounters, not just annoyed.

And then, as it turns out, Golddust got sick fairly soon afterward, with
cystitis, a condition that stress can contribute to. We had to get her
X-rayed to make sure she did not have kidney stones or a blockage. My main
worry is that the stress over the kitten will make Golddust sick again.
Golddust was here first. She should feel safe and comfortable in her own
home. It gets me mad when I see cats at a shelter who were given up
because they didn't get along with a new kitten in the house. These
people, in my view, are not true cat people, but I digress.

Currently, they are in separate rooms until Golddust fully recuperates.
I'm thinking we might supervise them when they are together, and keep them
in different rooms when we leave the house. I'm not sure how long we
should do this, however. Any input would be appreciated.

I don't want them to just tolerate each other. I want them to be friends.
It is obvious that Luna wants to be top cat, but she does not like to be
left alone, we have found. Golddust gets annoyed with her, but stares at
her in fascination when she plays and has licked her. I am not without
hope.

But I am wondering how long we should give it. We don't want Golddust to
get sick again, and we want to do what is best for Luna, too.

As for the declawing issue, that is completely secondary at this point.
Taking her claws away would not make her harmless to Golddust, probably.

Thank again for reading.

Sharon



Brian or Sharon Beuchaw wrote:
Chris wrote:
Well, I don't think the clawing/declawing is the issue. I agree it sounds
like kitten behavior. I don't know where your vet gets its ideas but I have
one female who has 'mothered' every kitten that came after her (3).

Yeah, I know that there are thousands (if not tens of thousands or
millions) of people out there that have an older female cat that has had a
female kitten introduced and gotten along. I'm thinking it may just be
the personalities/traits of these specific cats.

It takes a while for them to settle in & I absolutely would not worry
about accidental scratches.

My wife and I were in a difference of opinion here - I thought that if
the kitten injured the older one, it would be pretty minor the first time
or two, then if the kitten really did get aggressive, it would get worse.
My wife seemed to think it would be a fairly major injury first time out
(either accidentally caused or instinctively caused).

Even declawed cats pack quite a wallop when a little
one really starts anoying them.

Yeah, the older cat is 11 lbs and the kitten's about 5 lbs, so the older
one really could whack (or sit on) the kitten fairly well if she got
****ed off enough.

And the fact that they sleep in the same
room, etc. just tells you that the big one is NOT afraid of the little guy.
Just give it some time & don't worry--you know they really do work it out
out in their own way!

That's kind of what I was thinking, but my wife's and my opinions are so
differing that it's too damn stressful to have to deal with this whole
thing every time something goes the tiniest bit awry with the cats.

Thanks for the post.

brian
--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to


--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Hi,

Sharon here. First of all, thanks for your concern. There have been
some things I think Brian has not noticed as much as I have. The older cat
seemed depressed after we brought the Luna in (wouldn't play, hid and
slept all day). Also, as Luna grew more comfortable in her new
environment, she became more aggressive and Golddust became reluctant to
go into the room with her at night to sleep. (Golddust has always put
herself to bed at night, or else Mommy might carry her and kiss her, and
she doesn't like that!) Also, one day Golddust followed me to the door as
I was leaving for work and sat on my purse, as if she didn't want me to
leave. We have had her five years and she has never behaved like that.
Then I noticed that the kitten would run up and start drinking water if
Golddust was drinking water, and Golddust would stop drinking. Same thing
with food. And whenever Golddust would come into the living from her
hiding place to hang with us, Luna would attack her. Golddust seemed
pretty shaken after these little encounters, not just annoyed.

And then, as it turns out, Golddust got sick fairly soon afterward, with
cystitis, a condition that stress can contribute to. We had to get her
X-rayed to make sure she did not have kidney stones or a blockage. My main
worry is that the stress over the kitten will make Golddust sick again.
Golddust was here first. She should feel safe and comfortable in her own
home. It gets me mad when I see cats at a shelter who were given up
because they didn't get along with a new kitten in the house. These
people, in my view, are not true cat people, but I digress.

Currently, they are in separate rooms until Golddust fully recuperates.
I'm thinking we might supervise them when they are together, and keep them
in different rooms when we leave the house. I'm not sure how long we
should do this, however. Any input would be appreciated.

I don't want them to just tolerate each other. I want them to be friends.
It is obvious that Luna wants to be top cat, but she does not like to be
left alone, we have found. Golddust gets annoyed with her, but stares at
her in fascination when she plays and has licked her. I am not without
hope.

But I am wondering how long we should give it. We don't want Golddust to
get sick again, and we want to do what is best for Luna, too.

As for the declawing issue, that is completely secondary at this point.
Taking her claws away would not make her harmless to Golddust, probably.

Thank again for reading.

Sharon



Brian or Sharon Beuchaw wrote:
Chris wrote:
Well, I don't think the clawing/declawing is the issue. I agree it sounds
like kitten behavior. I don't know where your vet gets its ideas but I have
one female who has 'mothered' every kitten that came after her (3).

Yeah, I know that there are thousands (if not tens of thousands or
millions) of people out there that have an older female cat that has had a
female kitten introduced and gotten along. I'm thinking it may just be
the personalities/traits of these specific cats.

It takes a while for them to settle in & I absolutely would not worry
about accidental scratches.

My wife and I were in a difference of opinion here - I thought that if
the kitten injured the older one, it would be pretty minor the first time
or two, then if the kitten really did get aggressive, it would get worse.
My wife seemed to think it would be a fairly major injury first time out
(either accidentally caused or instinctively caused).

Even declawed cats pack quite a wallop when a little
one really starts anoying them.

Yeah, the older cat is 11 lbs and the kitten's about 5 lbs, so the older
one really could whack (or sit on) the kitten fairly well if she got
****ed off enough.

And the fact that they sleep in the same
room, etc. just tells you that the big one is NOT afraid of the little guy.
Just give it some time & don't worry--you know they really do work it out
out in their own way!

That's kind of what I was thinking, but my wife's and my opinions are so
differing that it's too damn stressful to have to deal with this whole
thing every time something goes the tiniest bit awry with the cats.

Thanks for the post.

brian
--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to


--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Hi,

Sharon here. First of all, thanks for your concern. There have been
some things I think Brian has not noticed as much as I have. The older cat
seemed depressed after we brought the Luna in (wouldn't play, hid and
slept all day). Also, as Luna grew more comfortable in her new
environment, she became more aggressive and Golddust became reluctant to
go into the room with her at night to sleep. (Golddust has always put
herself to bed at night, or else Mommy might carry her and kiss her, and
she doesn't like that!) Also, one day Golddust followed me to the door as
I was leaving for work and sat on my purse, as if she didn't want me to
leave. We have had her five years and she has never behaved like that.
Then I noticed that the kitten would run up and start drinking water if
Golddust was drinking water, and Golddust would stop drinking. Same thing
with food. And whenever Golddust would come into the living from her
hiding place to hang with us, Luna would attack her. Golddust seemed
pretty shaken after these little encounters, not just annoyed.

And then, as it turns out, Golddust got sick fairly soon afterward, with
cystitis, a condition that stress can contribute to. We had to get her
X-rayed to make sure she did not have kidney stones or a blockage. My main
worry is that the stress over the kitten will make Golddust sick again.
Golddust was here first. She should feel safe and comfortable in her own
home. It gets me mad when I see cats at a shelter who were given up
because they didn't get along with a new kitten in the house. These
people, in my view, are not true cat people, but I digress.

Currently, they are in separate rooms until Golddust fully recuperates.
I'm thinking we might supervise them when they are together, and keep them
in different rooms when we leave the house. I'm not sure how long we
should do this, however. Any input would be appreciated.

I don't want them to just tolerate each other. I want them to be friends.
It is obvious that Luna wants to be top cat, but she does not like to be
left alone, we have found. Golddust gets annoyed with her, but stares at
her in fascination when she plays and has licked her. I am not without
hope.

But I am wondering how long we should give it. We don't want Golddust to
get sick again, and we want to do what is best for Luna, too.

As for the declawing issue, that is completely secondary at this point.
Taking her claws away would not make her harmless to Golddust, probably.

Thank again for reading.

Sharon



Brian or Sharon Beuchaw wrote:
Chris wrote:
Well, I don't think the clawing/declawing is the issue. I agree it sounds
like kitten behavior. I don't know where your vet gets its ideas but I have
one female who has 'mothered' every kitten that came after her (3).

Yeah, I know that there are thousands (if not tens of thousands or
millions) of people out there that have an older female cat that has had a
female kitten introduced and gotten along. I'm thinking it may just be
the personalities/traits of these specific cats.

It takes a while for them to settle in & I absolutely would not worry
about accidental scratches.

My wife and I were in a difference of opinion here - I thought that if
the kitten injured the older one, it would be pretty minor the first time
or two, then if the kitten really did get aggressive, it would get worse.
My wife seemed to think it would be a fairly major injury first time out
(either accidentally caused or instinctively caused).

Even declawed cats pack quite a wallop when a little
one really starts anoying them.

Yeah, the older cat is 11 lbs and the kitten's about 5 lbs, so the older
one really could whack (or sit on) the kitten fairly well if she got
****ed off enough.

And the fact that they sleep in the same
room, etc. just tells you that the big one is NOT afraid of the little guy.
Just give it some time & don't worry--you know they really do work it out
out in their own way!

That's kind of what I was thinking, but my wife's and my opinions are so
differing that it's too damn stressful to have to deal with this whole
thing every time something goes the tiniest bit awry with the cats.

Thanks for the post.

brian
--
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have to change the reply address to


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