The Things Some People Say (OT)

Kreisleriana wrote:

Typical exchange:
Mr. T: Are you hungry?
T: mistakenly thinking he is actually asking me if I am hungry No.
Mr. T: Since he was actually trying to tell me he is hungry and wants
something to eat, stews, frustrated, thinking I am a Neanderthal
woman

That's hilarious.

I once read a humor book called something like "Jewish as a Second
Language". The joke was, that to understand what's going on in a Jewish
family, you would need to learn to reinterpret everything you hear
according to an entirely new and different set of rules. Ostensibly
directed at non-Jews marrying into Jewish families, the book was really
meant for Jews to read and snicker at ourselves.

Anyway, one of the examples was of a Jewish mother, who used similar
indirect modes of communication. If she was cold, she would say, "Do
you need a sweater?"

Personally, I call that co-dependence, but a minor quibble!

Joyce

On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 00:22:54 GMT, yodeled:

Kreisleriana wrote:

Had an aunt like that, rest her soul. Her idea of a perfectly
acceptable conversational gambit was "So what birth control
method are you using, dear?"

Ooo, I'd have loved to answer THAT one, bwahahaha...


Well, it's all about who else is standing right there when she asks.
:P



Theresa
Stinky Pictures: http://community.webshots.com/album/125591586JWEFwh
My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com

On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 00:31:15 GMT, yodeled:

Kreisleriana wrote:

Typical exchange:
Mr. T: Are you hungry?
T: mistakenly thinking he is actually asking me if I am hungry No.
Mr. T: Since he was actually trying to tell me he is hungry and wants
something to eat, stews, frustrated, thinking I am a Neanderthal
woman

That's hilarious.

I once read a humor book called something like "Jewish as a Second
Language". The joke was, that to understand what's going on in a Jewish
family, you would need to learn to reinterpret everything you hear
according to an entirely new and different set of rules. Ostensibly
directed at non-Jews marrying into Jewish families, the book was really
meant for Jews to read and snicker at ourselves.

I know that book! My favorite thing in it is the cartoon of the two
women standing in a movie line, and having their conversation into
microphones, broadcasting it all over the area at large.



Theresa
Stinky Pictures: http://community.webshots.com/album/125591586JWEFwh
My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com

On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 17:47:08 -0700, "Monique Y. Mudama"
yodeled:

On 2004-12-24, Kreisleriana penned:

It's certainly why New Yorkers are often considered rude in much of
the rest of the US. We do have a rather direct way of talking to
each other when we do talk.
When I was with the former Mr. T, an Australian of English parentage,
he would absolutely cringe at how direct I was, when I thought I was
being very polite. He would drive me to distraction with how
*indirect* he always was, and he thought I was thoroughly obtuse.
Typical exchange:
Mr. T: Are you hungry?
T: mistakenly thinking he is actually asking me if I am hungry No.
Mr. T: Since he was actually trying to tell me he is hungry and wants
something to eat, stews, frustrated, thinking I am a Neanderthal
woman

Replace Mr. T with me, and T with my husband, and that fits my relationship to
a, well, "T".

It doesn't help that by the time I'm really hungry, I get a headache and can't
think straight, so I just want FOOD IN ME NOW.


Well, I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I don't see anything wrong
with just saying so, rather than asking your loved one to be a mind
reader.


Theresa
Stinky Pictures: http://community.webshots.com/album/125591586JWEFwh
My Blog: http://www.humanitas.blogspot.com

On 2004-12-24, Kreisleriana penned:

It's certainly why New Yorkers are often considered rude in much of
the rest of the US. We do have a rather direct way of talking to
each other when we do talk.
When I was with the former Mr. T, an Australian of English parentage,
he would absolutely cringe at how direct I was, when I thought I was
being very polite. He would drive me to distraction with how
*indirect* he always was, and he thought I was thoroughly obtuse.
Typical exchange:
Mr. T: Are you hungry?
T: mistakenly thinking he is actually asking me if I am hungry No.
Mr. T: Since he was actually trying to tell me he is hungry and wants
something to eat, stews, frustrated, thinking I am a Neanderthal
woman

Replace Mr. T with me, and T with my husband, and that fits my relationship to
a, well, "T".

It doesn't help that by the time I'm really hungry, I get a headache and can't
think straight, so I just want FOOD IN ME NOW. Responses like the above make
me furious, because I'm already grouchy and it seems like Eric's purposely
trying to make me miserable.

--
monique, who is sometimes allowed to pet Oscar, a grey^H^H^H^Hblue-cream DLH
with an attitude!

On 2004-12-24, Kreisleriana penned:
On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 17:47:08 -0700, "Monique Y. Mudama"
yodeled:

Replace Mr. T with me, and T with my husband, and that fits my relationship
to a, well, "T".

It doesn't help that by the time I'm really hungry, I get a headache and
can't think straight, so I just want FOOD IN ME NOW.


Well, I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I don't see anything wrong with
just saying so, rather than asking your loved one to be a mind reader.


I absolutely agree with you, in theory. In practice, though, I seem to behave
that way.

There's a little bit of monologue on Tori Amos' Jupiter EP. She's talking
about how she's been seeing this guy and having tea with him for months, and
every single time he asks her how many sugars she'd like in her tea.
Eventually, she gets really ****ed off, because how hard can it be to remember
"how many sugars a girl takes in her tea"???

Seems like, reasonable or not, after the 4000th time I've asked him if he's
hungry because I'd like to eat, he should figure it out!

And, to be fair, we have been negotiating such communication issues over time.

--
monique, who is sometimes allowed to pet Oscar, a grey^H^H^H^Hblue-cream DLH
with an attitude!

Kreisleriana wrote:

I know that book! My favorite thing in it is the cartoon of the two
women standing in a movie line, and having their conversation into
microphones, broadcasting it all over the area at large.

My favorite bit is the one for young women, where you're supposed to
pretend you have company over whenever you answer the phone, so the
caller will think you're really popular, and also so you won't seem
too eager to talk to the person who's calling (playing hard to get).
So, when someone calls and you pick up the phone, the caller is supposed
to hear something like, "...*hate* playing tennis when I have my
period! ... Hello?"

LOL

Joyce

Kreisleriana wrote:

Well, I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I don't see anything wrong
with just saying so, rather than asking your loved one to be a mind
reader.

But, "if you REALLY loved me, you'd know what I want."

Joyce

Kreisleriana had some very interesting
things to say about The Things Some People Say (OT):

It doesn't help that by the time I'm really hungry, I get a headache and can't
think straight, so I just want FOOD IN ME NOW.
Well, I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I don't see anything wrong
with just saying so, rather than asking your loved one to be a mind
reader.

As much as I love my DH, he's a bit deficient in people skills [he's a
techie, what can I say? :-)]. Subtle does not work on him. In fact,
sledgehammers do not always work on him. :-)

--
"The universe is quite robust in design and appears to be
doing just fine on its own, incompetent support staff notwithstanding.
:-)" - the Dennis formerly known as (evil), MCFL

Monique Y. Mudama wrote:


There's a little bit of monologue on Tori Amos' Jupiter EP. She's talking
about how she's been seeing this guy and having tea with him for months,
and every single time he asks her how many sugars she'd like in her tea.
Eventually, she gets really ****ed off, because how hard can it be to
remember "how many sugars a girl takes in her tea"???

Yeah, but that's not expecting him to be a mind reader. I mean she's
TOLD him 400 times!

Seems like, reasonable or not, after the 4000th time I've asked him
if he's hungry because I'd like to eat, he should figure it out!

Well sure. If you just want to suggest that the two of you get something
to eat, then why not ask if he's hungry? But in T and Mr. T's case, he
seemed to think that saying, "Are you hungry" was going to send her into
a frenzy of wifely servitude. ie, "Are you hungry?" means "Woman, get me
my dinner!"

Joyce