[OT] Age Appropriate Dress?

wrote:

The Pima, I believe. Their territory crosses the US-Mexican border,
and the ones on the American side have all kinds of health problems,
particularly diabetes, whereas the ones on the Mexican side, although
just as fat as the American ones, are healthy. It has to do with their
diet. The Americans eat a diet of fast food and processed junk, with
tons of sugar and hydrogenated fats. The Mexicans eat a traditional
diet for the region - largely beans and corn. They aren't any thinner
than the American Pima, but they're a lot healthier.

I think diet and activity level have a much bigger influence on one's
health than weight, in and of itself.



A lot of researchers think that too. But diet and activity are actually
rather difficult and expensive to measure in a scientific study, whereas
weight is quick, easy and C.H.E.A.P. So, most long term general health
studies (including the one I work for!) can still only study weight or
other basic measurements of body size.

wrote in message
...
dnr wrote:

I also often wonder if my cats - if they'
were able - would LOL at some of my outfits, especially the "full
orange-and-blue"
regalia seen recently during playoff weeks.....

Yay, we're on topic!

One thing I love about animals is that they do not care what we
look like or what we're wearing, whether it's age appropriate or
size appropriate or whatever. Well, OK, one of my cats doesn't
like me in shorts because she doesn't like to sit or step on bare
legs. She'll balance herself precariously on 2 square inches of
the shorts material to avoid stepping on (ewwwww) *human skin*.

This reminds me of a wonderful ad for the Peninsula Humane Society
(in the San Francisco area), which ran on TV for several months last
year. It was a slide show of different human faces, with a voiceover
saying, "Whether you're young, old, straight, gay, fat, thin, tall,
short..." (and a bunch of other characteristics) "...you are
beautiful. Beautiful. To him." And when it said "to him" the screen
showed a photo of a dog. Then cut to the PHS logo. I loved that!

Joyce

That is great!

Joy

wrote in message
...
-L. wrote:

Miniskirts on "older"
women make them look like they are trying to be younger, which to me
disrespects their maturity - I believe a woman should love her body as
it ages and appreciate the changes that happen

I really don't understand how wearing a miniskirt is disrespectful
toward one's own age. Maybe a 70-year-old in a miniskirt isn't trying
to convince anyone that she's younger. Maybe she doesn't give a rat's
*ss what age some stranger believes she is. Maybe she just likes to wear
miniskirts. Maybe she likes how she looks in them, or maybe her husband
or partner thinks she looks sexy in them. How can anyone who doesn't
know someone personally claim to know what his or her reasons are for
the clothing he or she chooses?

This reminds me of a speech I heard at a Toastmasters meeting a few months
ago. The speaker was referring to people expressing political opinions, but
he used a phrase that applies here. He called it "the assumption of psychic
ability", and was referring to the idea so many people have that they know
what someone else is thinking.

Joy


My feeling about clothes is that possession is *ten* tenths of the law.
In other words, if an old person wears an article of clothing, then that
article of clothing automatically becomes "old people's clothing". If a
woman wears a 3-piece suit and tie, then the suit and tie are women's
clothing. We should define who the clothes are for, and not let the
clothes
define who we are (or should be).

Joyce

wrote in message
...
Yoj wrote:

I don't know why everybody can't worry about the beam in their own eye
instead of worrying about the mote in their neighbor's eye!

I agree, except that people are the worst when it comes to their own
weight. Most women I meet are neurotically over-critical about their
own bodies, especially their weight. That's not healthy, either. It's not
healthy for them, and it's not good for society, either, to have everybody
obsessing about their weight, instead of putting their energy into
something productive.

Joyce

That's true, of course. The only reason weight matters, really, is in
relation to health. Even then, there are variations. Some overweight
people are healthier than some skinny people. I think everybody has his or
her own idea of what constitutes beauty in either sex. The problem is, too
many people sneer at, look down on, or put down people who don't fit their
standard. Also, too many people obsess about trying to fit that picture
themselves. I suspect that very few people match their own ideal for
appearance. Some of us accept that fact. Others go to extremes including
diet and surgery to attain that impossible goal. :-(

Joy

Well, for what it's worth, my mother cried and said that I was 'too fat
to lead a normal life' when I was a whopping size 16 as a teenager.

I've never been LESS than a size sixteen, but I certainly
wasn't fat then (I once got down to a size fourteen,
briefly, and you could have used my rib-cage for a washboard.)

Exactly. I'm a BIG GIRL, with size 11 feet and 8 1/2-inch wrists.
At a size 16, I had a flat stomach and no double chin. What I did
have was muscles up the wazoo, and would sink to the bottom of the
pool. My mother just never admitted that she and my father couldn't
produce a 'petite' child if their lives depended on it, and she
always wanted a petite daughter to brag on. Never gonna happen. She
died thinking that she was a failure in the child biz. *sigh*

Jane
- owned and operated by Princess Rita

Well, I have to admit, on all other issues he is an excellent father - very
involved, patient, and thoughtful. But he has huge issues about weight
(even with his own weight - he run incessantly to keep his weight down).

Actually this is reassuring in a way. It's still a problem, his deal
with weight, but at least it's not because he's an emotionally abusive
dick who gets his jollies by putting down others. He's projecting his
own weight issues onto his family...which isn't fair, but it's
understandable. When the lens you use to look at /yourself/ is skewed,
it's no wonder your reflections of everyone else are also skewed.

--Fil

His friends hold
blue-collar jobs like graphic designer, portrait framer, security
guard.

Graphic designer is a blue-collar job? OK, maybe in terms of pay...


All three graphic designers took the "technical" stream in high school
and went to college as opposed to university...They consider themselves
"skilled workers" as opposed to "Executives" and they're proud of it

***

"Momma brought you in, she can take you out"

I'm not a fan of this kind of mother-child approach, though perhaps for
a biased reason. I almost died of a ruptured appendix when I was 14
because my mom didn't believe in "admitting weakness" and taking me to
a doctor. No, I was supposed to get over what was allegedly "PMS,
Cramps, A Tummyache Or Just You Being Dramatic" through my own strength
of will. I wasn't permitted painkillers like Tylenol or Aspirin
either.

My mother's ethics--that it is a sin to admit weakness to
another--could have killed me. Perhaps I was fortunate that I was not
permitted to miss school, no matter how sick I was. Passing out in
science class was enough to get the teacher to take me to the hospital
and convince my father that something had to be done, no matter how his
wife chose to get back at him for it later.

So really, even if you think your child is making a bad choice, I think
it's in your ability to express disagreement, but not right to attempt
to control an adult child, use blackmail on a child of any age, etc.

I remember going to university and watching other girls (and guys) go
wild, doing stuff they later regretted because they suddenly had
freedom from their parents. As for me, my idea of "going wild" was not
folding my socks (And not getting punished for failing to do so), not
feeling it might be safer to sleep in my car, buying Midol and Aspirin,
all things I couldn't do at home. (Though I do regret drinking Pepsi
for breakfast...ulcers after 6 years of that...)

--Fil

Cheryl Perkins wrote:

wrote:
snip
I think that everyone who
feels the need to judge what other people wear, based on their age or
size, is seriously in need of a life.

How do you distiniguish between 'need to judge' and 'holding an opinion'?

Holding an opinion: "I think that outfit looks ugly on her."
Need to judge: "She should know better than to wear that outfit."

Naturally we all have the right to our taste and opinions. I don't
like the way everyone dresses, either. But that's just my taste. Just
because I think something looks ugly, that doesn't mean I think they
*shouldn't* wear it, or that they should "know better", as though
there were some sort of consensus on what is the correct way to dress
for every age and body type.

I think everyone can wear what they want, but I also sometimes think
people make extremely poor choices as to what they where... [snip]
because the outfit is obviously designed with a different body type
in mind than a particular wearer has.

Again, though, beauty is in the mind of the beholder. So even if you
think something looks bad on someone, that doesn't mean everyone does,
or that the wearer is too stupid or in denial to know it looks bad.

Define "looks bad". That's a totally subjective opinion. Which, of
course, we're entitled to have, as we both agree. That's quite different
from a judgement, though, which to me implies that the person is doing
something wrong (or stupid, etc).

Being rude to people on the basis of what they wear is, well, rude. Not
being able to form a private opinion on something is rather wishy-washy.
At the very least.

I hope I've made the distinction more clear.

Joyce

Jane wrote:

Parents are remarkably stupid when it comes to knowing the effect they
have on their children. My mother sent me down a path of bad self-esteem
that led to a suicide attempt or two, a breakdown, years of therapy,
finally ending at a size 32 and no desire to ever diet again. I exercise,
and eat healthy and that's as far as I'm going. Never again am I going
to let the number on a scale tell me how I should feel that day. Never.

Well, that is just about the sanest thing I've seen today on this subject!

The idea that a number on a scale can determine your self-worth is absurd,
at least in the abstract. Of course, when you're surrounded by people saying
things like "Why do people with disgusting fat have to wear tight clothing
that shows every lump and bump?" it's kind of hard to keep that negativity
from seeping into your psyche. So bravo to you for choosing not to let
other people's judgements decide who you are and what you're worth! That
takes a lot of courage and strength.

Joyce

wrote:
Cheryl Perkins wrote:

wrote:
snip
I think that everyone who
feels the need to judge what other people wear, based on their
age or size, is seriously in need of a life.

How do you distiniguish between 'need to judge' and 'holding an
opinion'?

Holding an opinion: "I think that outfit looks ugly on her."
Need to judge: "She should know better than to wear that outfit."

Naturally we all have the right to our taste and opinions. I don't
like the way everyone dresses, either. But that's just my taste. Just
because I think something looks ugly, that doesn't mean I think they
*shouldn't* wear it, or that they should "know better", as though
there were some sort of consensus on what is the correct way to dress
for every age and body type.

I think everyone can wear what they want, but I also sometimes
think people make extremely poor choices as to what they where...
[snip] because the outfit is obviously designed with a different
body type in mind than a particular wearer has.

Again, though, beauty is in the mind of the beholder. So even if you
think something looks bad on someone, that doesn't mean everyone does,
or that the wearer is too stupid or in denial to know it looks bad.

Define "looks bad". That's a totally subjective opinion. Which, of
course, we're entitled to have, as we both agree. That's quite
different from a judgement, though, which to me implies that the
person is doing something wrong (or stupid, etc).

Being rude to people on the basis of what they wear is, well,
rude. Not being able to form a private opinion on something is
rather wishy-washy. At the very least.

I hope I've made the distinction more clear.

Joyce

Last year, I was walking along the beach and came across a _very_ large lady
wearing a bikini. I was surprised and a little shoked at first, then I
thought, good for her, why worry what other people think if you're
comfortable, it certainly doesn't hurt anybody.
--
Adrian (Owned by Snoopy and Bagheera)
A House is not a home, without a cat.
http://community.webshots.com/user/clowderuk