Goodbye to my Friend.

"Mac Cool" wrote in message
...
Goodbye to my Friend

Today my friend went to sleep. He has been having troubles these last
few weeks with his heart and today a clot broke loose and paralyzed his
back legs. Deeply saddened that our fight was over I took him to the pet
hospital where he laid gently in my wife's arms with his head resting on
my lap until he fell asleep. So gentle was his passing that I was the
last to realize he was gone, at last he was out of pain. I still agonize
over the decision. In my heart I know I did everything possible to keep
the cat he was, alive. The last few days he was slipping away, not just
his body but his essence, that part of him that made him my friend.
Putting him to sleep was the humane decision, intellectually I know this
and in my heart I felt that he truly would have agreed if he could have
spoken but I could see in his eyes as I lay petting him this morning,
that he was asking for my help. Help me, take the pain away. So I did
the last thing I could do for you my friend, I took away your pain.

Tommy came into our lives when he was about seven months old. My
daughter and I went to a cat adoption fair at Petsmart. Among all the
animals one stood out, a young male kitten hiding under the newspapers
in his cage as he peeked at the strangers surrounding him. Most people
ignored him, who wants a scaredy cat and when a few did stop to look he
would cringe under his flimsy protection from the world. But something
different happened when my daughter approached the cage, for the first
time he crawled out from under his newspaper and brushed against the
cage; his new family had arrived and he didn't have to hide anymore.

We learned that Tommy was rescued from a trailer park where he had been
abandoned, we learned that he had a very difficult kittenhood, that he
had been locked away and nearly starved, that without a mother he had
taught himself how to survive. Tommy would carry the scars from that
time the rest of his life and he would become very upset at any closed
doors in the house, except for the exterior doors, he had no desire to
go out there. Tommy also was careful to never miss a meal and it was a
few years before he became comfortable with an empty food bowl. His fear
of starving showed as he grew to be an enormous thirty-four pound tom
cat. Strangely, he was never graceful even as a kitten. I'll never
forget the time he was sitting on the edge of my desk surveying the
household and for no reason slipped and fell in the trash can. His ego
was bruised more than his body. When we found Tommy at the adoption fair
he had no whiskers, he had been attacked by another cat who had chewed
his whiskers off, perhaps this made him clumsy.

My daughters never really took to Tommy and neither did my wife. To
them, he was the grumpy old cat who would took swipes at their legs as
they walked past, never breaking skin but reminding them who had the
claws. Tommy never liked kids and he didn't like girls in particular,
the younger they were the less he liked them and they were rarely
properly deferential toward his status as king of the house; because to
Tommy you see, it was his house, his rules. Eventually he grew to
challenge me, one day as he lay in my bathroom sink I tried to shoo him
out and he took a swipe at me with his claws. As he recovered from his
quick flight across the room he must have decided that second place was
good enough as from that moment on he became my loyal friend. After his
attempted coup d'état failed Tommy followed me from room to room always
flopping down near my feet. Sometimes he would nearly trip me when he
would silently flop down at my heels as I stood at the kitchen counter.
When I left the house Tommy would lay in the window and watch for my
return. He would always be sitting near the door waiting for me as I
entered. At nighttime he would jump on the bed and flop himself down on
my chest nearly cutting off my air while he lay with his nose inches
from mine, purring and blowing his stinky breath in my face. Careful
though, if I dared breath in his face I would get the look that says,
'this is not how things work' and he would get up and lay at my feet.
Tommy was the softest animal I've ever petted and people loved to touch
him. I used to joke that when he died I would make a rug from his pelt
to throw in the floor and it would be like he never left, just cheaper.
As he lay asleep in my arms today I remembered my jest and would have
maybe smiled but his beautiful fur was ruined where the doctors had
shaved his side, his neck and his paw last week in order to save his
life. The dumb things you think of and it made me that much sadder that
he had suffered yet more indignities for so little gain. People comfort
themselves with thoughts that their loved ones go to heaven and they are
up there, happy and looking down watching over us. I so much wish I
could believe something like that it would ease the emptiness in my
heart, it would relieve the anguish each time I look down expecting to
see my friend and he is not there.

Tommy lived the life he wanted to live. Despite a rough start to life
and beating odds that nearly killed him, he lived happily, eating well,
being my happy loyal friend to the end. I didn't judge him and he didn't
judge me, we were just happy being. I hope my friend that you understand
what I did and that a dignified death was the best I could do. Goodbye.
I miss you.

http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/2...ykittengw1.jpg
http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/4...en07001la9.jpg

Tommy
2002 - 5/31/2008

Thank you to the people that offered advice and support.


I hope you'll find consolation in knowing you went the distance for him.
You
honored the trust he placed in you in life and in death. A true friend could
do
no more.

I wish I could find adoptives like you for all my cats.

My condolences.

Phil

"Mac Cool" wrote in message
...


People comfort
themselves with thoughts that their loved ones go to heaven and they are
up there, happy and looking down watching over us. I so much wish I
could believe something like that it would ease the emptiness in my
heart, it would relieve the anguish each time I look down expecting to
see my friend and he is not there.

Oh rest assured that there is a place, my friend.

My beloved cat Zipper, whom I had been with for 13 of his 16 years died in
July of 2001 after a long bout with cancer. I put him through an ordeal
which now I wish I had not. It bought him a few months is all. Prior to
that he had a huge thymoma in his chest partially attached to his heart. I
found a surgeon who could remove it and despite all odds he lived and was
thriving until 6 months later when he developed intestinal lymphoma. His
ordeal was my ordeal and we did it all, chemo, PEG tube, the works. He was
diagnosed as in remission and died 2 weeks later of cardiomyopathy. His
road to heaven was a rough one, thanks to me. To say I loved my cat would
have been trite. His death is something I never have really completely
recovered from. I just can't tell you the bond we shared.

So let me pass on to you this story.

The morning after Zipper died, I was lying in my bed crying like a baby. My
hair and face were sticky from tears and snot and I wanted to die. I was
never sadder in my life and I felt like I had been on a bender for a month
as my whole body was in pain. I was thinking maybe I should just end it all
and the weapon I keep in my dresser began to look good to me. I've related
this story before but I am just now telling you that my thoughts were of
suicide because of the way my beloved friend finally passed. My heart was
ripped apart knowing he had died in pain, and suffered before the emergency
vet could send him on his way. I waited too long in my selfish desire to
keep him with me.

I felt a sudden and very noticeable jolt at the foot of my bed. I whipped
around and shouted his name. I felt footsteps across my bed coming towards
me and I gasped. I was fully awake, it was no dream. It was 7:45 am I know
because I looked at the clock. I could feel him, his presence, his weight
and his breath. I had felt it every single night for more than 13 years
after all and I knew what I was feeling.

I sat there for an instant, then I felt the presence move away and jump off
the bed. I then heard distinctly, two sets of cat feet thumping down my
hall. Clear as a bell I heard those feet because at the time my hall was
tiled and you know how cat claws sound on tile. Not one set, but two but
only 1 had jumped on my bed and I know it as him.

So that happened. It was very real, it was astonishing. And in an instant,
I put away my thoughts of a moment ago. The grief passed, I felt calm and I
had a sense I could deal with it after all. And while the coming months
were lonely and sad and I found myself crying in odd places like grocery
stores and such, I did survive. My friend had come to say cheerio and that
all was well. The worst of my grief had passed miraculously.

And 6 weeks after Zipper died, on August 29th of 2001, a new cat came into
my life. It was the most unbelievable set of circumstances that led us to
find each other but we did. It is a story of its own, so unlikely was the
way it played out. And his name was Buddy, given to him by the people who
had befriended him and gave him food while he lived rough. He was an abused
and abandoned cat prior to that with what the vet said was clearly PTSD. He
smelled like old socks, he farted like a truck driver and he snored like my
ex. I loved him from the day I met him and he blossomed into a gorgeous and
wonderful companion. I know who sent him to me. We grew together, two
broken hearts who healed one another. He was a true old soul and every day
with him was a gift.

Buddy died in October of 2007. His death was peaceful, he too had thrown a
series of clots. He was left at the vet's office in the small hope he could
pull through. That night I was asleep and dreaming and I was awoken by a
loud meow, the raspy, gravely voice of Buddy. It was 4 am and when the
phone rang at 8:30 I knew it was the vet calling with the news of his quiet
passing. She didn't know when he died but she speculated from the rigor
that it was around 4 am. He was on strong pain killers she said and she
assured me he did not suffer.

So I hope this helps you in your quest for peace. There is another place,
and your friend is there, of this I have no doubt. Be at peace knowing they
have all the time in the world and they want you to be well and happy. And
trust me, before all this happened I would have been the last person on
earth to so much as even suggest it.

Paul

It's always so sad to lose our precious pets. Their life spans are much
shorter than ours so we can take care of them for their whole lives.

Barb

"Mac Cool" wrote

Tommy also was careful to never miss a meal and it was a
few years before he became comfortable with an empty food bowl. His fear
of starving showed as he grew to be an enormous thirty-four pound tom
cat.

Which is almost certainly why he died from heart disease at such an early
age.

I was not going to bring it up until you decided to be such an asshole about
the
FACT that a 14-year-old ILL cat should be kept inside where he is safe.

cybercat:
Which is almost certainly why he died from heart disease at such an
early age.

Thank you captain obvious.

I was not going to bring it up until you decided to be such an
asshole about the
FACT that a 14-year-old ILL cat should be kept inside where he is
safe.

BTW, just like the jerks in the dog group I mentioned yesterday, you
didn't even ask any questions about her cat's environment. You just
assumed the worst and began preaching. At least you were nicer to jjg than
others were to me but in the end your petty attempt to hurt my feelings
was a good demonstration of the type of person I warned jjg about.

"Mac Cool" wrote in message
...
cybercat:
Which is almost certainly why he died from heart disease at such an
early age.

Thank you captain obvious.

So why, then, did you not address this issue? Warning others with obese
cats that heart disease and a short life is the common outcome? Why was
it not addressed at all in ANY of your posts?

We adopted our petite female (her healthy weight is 8 lbs according to
her vet) when she was five years old and eighteen pounds. We reduced
her weight to 9 lbs. At 13 she has a heart condition that is presently
kept in check with beta blockers.


BTW, just like the jerks in the dog group I mentioned yesterday, you
didn't even ask any questions about her cat's environment.

No matter what his environment, indoor is safer. It would be if he were
NOT 14 and seriously ill, and he IS 14 and seriously ill.

You just
assumed the worst and began preaching. At least you were nicer to jjg than
others were to me but in the end your petty attempt to hurt my feelings
was a good demonstration of the type of person I warned jjg about.

Yes, well you--who without apology contributed to putting your 6-year-old
cat
into an early grave, and "j'g," who is irresponsible enough to even
suggest exposing an old, ill cat to the outdoors unsupervised, are the
people
I would warn any pet adoption people to look out for.

Show me the post where you acknowledged that you should NEVER have
allowed your cat to get to 35 pounds. I see lots where you want all the
sympathy you can get, but I saw not one taking responsibility for your
own negligence in allowing him to become morbidly obese.

Response to "cybercat" :

snip

Show me the post where you acknowledged that you should NEVER have
allowed your cat to get to 35 pounds. I see lots where you want
all the sympathy you can get, but I saw not one taking
responsibility for your own negligence in allowing him to become
morbidly obese.

Hey, Mac Cool, I feel your pain and I know someone as blunt as
cybercat doesn't help, but I think I missed the "34 pounds" part.

Phat Kat, our newest arrival is over 22 pounds and it FREAKS ME OUT.
To know that you "allowed" your precious kitty to reach ~34lbs. is a
little bit out there.

I am a bit too "sloshed" to cast any judgment. But I feel your pain,
wish you didn't have to go through it -- but at the same time wonder
if ThirtyFourPounder - HAD - to go through what (s)he did!?

Maybe I should have kept this to myself... ?

P.S. Please take no offense. I meant none.

--
-Lost
Remove the extra words to reply by e-mail. Don't e-mail me. I am
kidding. No I am not.

"-Lost" wrote in message
...
Response to "cybercat" :

snip

Show me the post where you acknowledged that you should NEVER have
allowed your cat to get to 35 pounds. I see lots where you want
all the sympathy you can get, but I saw not one taking
responsibility for your own negligence in allowing him to become
morbidly obese.

Hey, Mac Cool, I feel your pain and I know someone as blunt as
cybercat doesn't help, but I think I missed the "34 pounds" part.

Phat Kat, our newest arrival is over 22 pounds and it FREAKS ME OUT.
To know that you "allowed" your precious kitty to reach ~34lbs. is a
little bit out there.

I am a bit too "sloshed" to cast any judgment. But I feel your pain,
wish you didn't have to go through it -- but at the same time wonder
if ThirtyFourPounder - HAD - to go through what (s)he did!?

Maybe I should have kept this to myself... ?

P.S. Please take no offense. I meant none.


I don't mean to be cruel. My heart just gets caught up with the cats.
I don't WANT whats-his-name to leave his ill old cat outside alone
to fend with anything that might come, and I don't think Mac or anyone
else should advocate it or sneer at those of us who think we should protect
our cats from harm.

Why are you drinking so much? Or is that another group?

Response to "cybercat" :

Why are you drinking so much? Or is that another group?

Is there an alt.drunks!? ; )

Anyway, there is no good reason. Major medical/life altering news --
excuses, excuses...

--
-Lost
Remove the extra words to reply by e-mail. Don't e-mail me. I am
kidding. No I am not.