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#11
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He's come a long way, baby!
On 6/20/2016 10:33 AM, Christina Websell wrote:
"Joy" wrote in message ... Sometimes I hardly recognize Koala, my little feral cat. When I first got him, he hid most of the time. Once he started coming out where he could be seen, he ran every time I took a step toward him. Eventually he got over that, and then he would let me pet him, but only if he were on the floor and I was standing. A couple of months ago he started coming up when I was sitting in my recliner, and lying on my legs, out of reach. He has actually laid on my lap a couple of times, and last night he came up on my lap and nudged and meowed for me to pet him for a while before he laid down on my lap. Joy Brilliant news! It takes patience, lots of patience over a long time. It's paying off. I'm happy for you both. Tweed Thank you. Yes, it's really lovely. After almost two years, I thought it would never happen. |
#12
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He's come a long way, baby!
On Mon, 20 Jun 2016 19:05:54 +0100, "Christina Websell"
wrote: "dgk" wrote in message .. . On Tue, 14 Jun 2016 16:07:44 -0700, Joy wrote: Sometimes I hardly recognize Koala, my little feral cat. When I first got him, he hid most of the time. Once he started coming out where he could be seen, he ran every time I took a step toward him. Eventually he got over that, and then he would let me pet him, but only if he were on the floor and I was standing. A couple of months ago he started coming up when I was sitting in my recliner, and lying on my legs, out of reach. He has actually laid on my lap a couple of times, and last night he came up on my lap and nudged and meowed for me to pet him for a while before he laid down on my lap. Joy What was the timeline for this? It gives me a certain amount of hope for Baby, who does come out from under the bed sometimes (for 10 minutes or so) and will let me pet her. I brought her with me when I moved from Queens NY last July so it's almost a year since she became an indoor cat, after spending the first six years of her life on the street in Queens. It isn't really great progress though. She still isn't very happy. I happened to be back in Queens last week and stopped by the old block. The green areas in front of my old house have been completely paved over, leaving nowhere for a cat to hang out. The same is true of the house across the street where my friend Serene lived. Both were small houses and are being renovated to hold three apartments each - not quite legally I'm sure. There are still two people willing to feed the cats on the block, but both are very elderly. When they die, there will be no one left to care fo them at all. Still, Baby seems so unhappy now that I'm considering taking her back to the block where her cat friends (and mother) still live. She may face tough times ahead, but I just don't know that she'll ever be happy as an indoor cat. On the other hand, I'm seriously working on getting a fence built around my yard here in Florida so I can let them out part-time. Not free roaming, but at least they'll have some grass to walk on and some bushes to lie under. Maybe she'll be content with that. I'll try it before doing something as drastic and taking her back. Ex ferals and those cats that went slightly feral because of losing their homes find it difficult to fit in to a home, either for the first time, or "again." It took me 3 or 4 months to get Boyfriend to feed just inside the back door (and two years before I could close it as he panicked without an escape route) luckily I live in a low crime area. It does take a long time, literally years for these cats to trust: never push them to interact with you, they will eventually. Please do not even think of taking Baby back to an uncertain future on the streets. Boyfie took a long time, much longer than you've given Baby but now his ideal world would be if I sat down all the time and he was on my knee 24/7. You have to be patient, and yes, sometimes it takes years. Baby will come fine if you give her space long enough and don't try to pet her. One day she will approach you. Just my experience with the most scaredy lost cat I ever had. I hope it helps. Tweed P.S. If you take Baby back to the streets you are blocked, you took her to Florida, now be patient Thanks, The problem is that there is really only a small window to consider it. I'll be back there in late August (for the 2016 US Open tennis championship), so that would have to be the time. After that it starts getting cold and I couldn't do it if she didn't have time to acclimate to the temperature. But I probably won't have a fence up in time to try her outside here before that happens. So she's likely to stay where she is, under my bed. The only reason I'm even thinking about it is because she was always so happy outside, running around with her tail straight up in the air, following me as I walked to Serene's house or back to my house. She was usually walking with Jet, her mom. Now, she rarely comes out from under the bed, and when she does, she walks around with her tail as low as it can get, scrapping the floor. But as I'm typing this I can see her walking down the hall so at least she is out looking the place over again. It's just three weeks short of a year since we arrived here. Well, maybe once I get the yard fenced and she can go out, she'll fall in love with the lizards and finally be happy again. |
#13
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He's come a long way, baby!
On 6/23/2016 4:47 AM, dgk wrote:
On Mon, 20 Jun 2016 19:05:54 +0100, "Christina Websell" wrote: "dgk" wrote in message ... On Tue, 14 Jun 2016 16:07:44 -0700, Joy wrote: Sometimes I hardly recognize Koala, my little feral cat. When I first got him, he hid most of the time. Once he started coming out where he could be seen, he ran every time I took a step toward him. Eventually he got over that, and then he would let me pet him, but only if he were on the floor and I was standing. A couple of months ago he started coming up when I was sitting in my recliner, and lying on my legs, out of reach. He has actually laid on my lap a couple of times, and last night he came up on my lap and nudged and meowed for me to pet him for a while before he laid down on my lap. Joy What was the timeline for this? It gives me a certain amount of hope for Baby, who does come out from under the bed sometimes (for 10 minutes or so) and will let me pet her. I brought her with me when I moved from Queens NY last July so it's almost a year since she became an indoor cat, after spending the first six years of her life on the street in Queens. It isn't really great progress though. She still isn't very happy. I happened to be back in Queens last week and stopped by the old block. The green areas in front of my old house have been completely paved over, leaving nowhere for a cat to hang out. The same is true of the house across the street where my friend Serene lived. Both were small houses and are being renovated to hold three apartments each - not quite legally I'm sure. There are still two people willing to feed the cats on the block, but both are very elderly. When they die, there will be no one left to care fo them at all. Still, Baby seems so unhappy now that I'm considering taking her back to the block where her cat friends (and mother) still live. She may face tough times ahead, but I just don't know that she'll ever be happy as an indoor cat. On the other hand, I'm seriously working on getting a fence built around my yard here in Florida so I can let them out part-time. Not free roaming, but at least they'll have some grass to walk on and some bushes to lie under. Maybe she'll be content with that. I'll try it before doing something as drastic and taking her back. Ex ferals and those cats that went slightly feral because of losing their homes find it difficult to fit in to a home, either for the first time, or "again." It took me 3 or 4 months to get Boyfriend to feed just inside the back door (and two years before I could close it as he panicked without an escape route) luckily I live in a low crime area. It does take a long time, literally years for these cats to trust: never push them to interact with you, they will eventually. Please do not even think of taking Baby back to an uncertain future on the streets. Boyfie took a long time, much longer than you've given Baby but now his ideal world would be if I sat down all the time and he was on my knee 24/7. You have to be patient, and yes, sometimes it takes years. Baby will come fine if you give her space long enough and don't try to pet her. One day she will approach you. Just my experience with the most scaredy lost cat I ever had. I hope it helps. Tweed P.S. If you take Baby back to the streets you are blocked, you took her to Florida, now be patient Thanks, The problem is that there is really only a small window to consider it. I'll be back there in late August (for the 2016 US Open tennis championship), so that would have to be the time. After that it starts getting cold and I couldn't do it if she didn't have time to acclimate to the temperature. But I probably won't have a fence up in time to try her outside here before that happens. So she's likely to stay where she is, under my bed. The only reason I'm even thinking about it is because she was always so happy outside, running around with her tail straight up in the air, following me as I walked to Serene's house or back to my house. She was usually walking with Jet, her mom. Now, she rarely comes out from under the bed, and when she does, she walks around with her tail as low as it can get, scrapping the floor. But as I'm typing this I can see her walking down the hall so at least she is out looking the place over again. It's just three weeks short of a year since we arrived here. Well, maybe once I get the yard fenced and she can go out, she'll fall in love with the lizards and finally be happy again. Yes, I understand. You're considering her happiness. The reason everybody is telling you not to take her back is that we're considering her safety. For a good many years, I had a cat door and my cats could go in and out as they wished. My current cats have always been indoor cats, so that is no longer the case. Also, I understand there are now coyotes in the neighborhood, so I wouldn't let them out anyway. If your area is safe from predators, you might consider installing a cat door. |
#14
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He's come a long way, baby!
On Thu, 23 Jun 2016 11:08:36 -0700, Joy
wrote: On 6/23/2016 4:47 AM, dgk wrote: On Mon, 20 Jun 2016 19:05:54 +0100, "Christina Websell" wrote: But as I'm typing this I can see her walking down the hall so at least she is out looking the place over again. It's just three weeks short of a year since we arrived here. Well, maybe once I get the yard fenced and she can go out, she'll fall in love with the lizards and finally be happy again. Yes, I understand. You're considering her happiness. The reason everybody is telling you not to take her back is that we're considering her safety. For a good many years, I had a cat door and my cats could go in and out as they wished. My current cats have always been indoor cats, so that is no longer the case. Also, I understand there are now coyotes in the neighborhood, so I wouldn't let them out anyway. If your area is safe from predators, you might consider installing a cat door. Yes, it's always safety vs freedom. I just hate seeing her slink around when she used to run around so happily. I really thought that she would adapt much quicker. Is a long miserable life better than a shorter happy life? If I thought that she'd never be happy inside, I'd take her back today, but I do hold out hope. I don't think we have coyotes around, although supposedly we do, but I have seen foxes in my yard. Small ones, not much bigger than the catrs, but I do not want them in the yard at the same time. So there will be a cat door, but it will only be open when the yard is enclosed and during the daylight hours. And only when I'm home, and at the beginning, only when I'm out there with them. |
#15
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He's come a long way, baby!
On 6/23/2016 8:42 PM, dgk wrote:
On Thu, 23 Jun 2016 11:08:36 -0700, Joy wrote: On 6/23/2016 4:47 AM, dgk wrote: On Mon, 20 Jun 2016 19:05:54 +0100, "Christina Websell" wrote: But as I'm typing this I can see her walking down the hall so at least she is out looking the place over again. It's just three weeks short of a year since we arrived here. Well, maybe once I get the yard fenced and she can go out, she'll fall in love with the lizards and finally be happy again. Yes, I understand. You're considering her happiness. The reason everybody is telling you not to take her back is that we're considering her safety. For a good many years, I had a cat door and my cats could go in and out as they wished. My current cats have always been indoor cats, so that is no longer the case. Also, I understand there are now coyotes in the neighborhood, so I wouldn't let them out anyway. If your area is safe from predators, you might consider installing a cat door. Yes, it's always safety vs freedom. I just hate seeing her slink around when she used to run around so happily. I really thought that she would adapt much quicker. Is a long miserable life better than a shorter happy life? If I thought that she'd never be happy inside, I'd take her back today, but I do hold out hope. I don't think we have coyotes around, although supposedly we do, but I have seen foxes in my yard. Small ones, not much bigger than the catrs, but I do not want them in the yard at the same time. So there will be a cat door, but it will only be open when the yard is enclosed and during the daylight hours. And only when I'm home, and at the beginning, only when I'm out there with them. I understand everything you say. How long have you had her? |
#16
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He's come a long way, baby!
On Thu, 23 Jun 2016 23:28:14 -0700, Joy
wrote: On 6/23/2016 8:42 PM, dgk wrote: On Thu, 23 Jun 2016 11:08:36 -0700, Joy wrote: On 6/23/2016 4:47 AM, dgk wrote: On Mon, 20 Jun 2016 19:05:54 +0100, "Christina Websell" wrote: But as I'm typing this I can see her walking down the hall so at least she is out looking the place over again. It's just three weeks short of a year since we arrived here. Well, maybe once I get the yard fenced and she can go out, she'll fall in love with the lizards and finally be happy again. Yes, I understand. You're considering her happiness. The reason everybody is telling you not to take her back is that we're considering her safety. For a good many years, I had a cat door and my cats could go in and out as they wished. My current cats have always been indoor cats, so that is no longer the case. Also, I understand there are now coyotes in the neighborhood, so I wouldn't let them out anyway. If your area is safe from predators, you might consider installing a cat door. Yes, it's always safety vs freedom. I just hate seeing her slink around when she used to run around so happily. I really thought that she would adapt much quicker. Is a long miserable life better than a shorter happy life? If I thought that she'd never be happy inside, I'd take her back today, but I do hold out hope. I don't think we have coyotes around, although supposedly we do, but I have seen foxes in my yard. Small ones, not much bigger than the catrs, but I do not want them in the yard at the same time. So there will be a cat door, but it will only be open when the yard is enclosed and during the daylight hours. And only when I'm home, and at the beginning, only when I'm out there with them. I understand everything you say. How long have you had her? Sorry, I was away for 10 days. I took her in almost exactly a year ago and moved to Florida the next week. |
#17
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He's come a long way, baby!
On 7/4/2016 9:00 PM, dgk wrote:
On Thu, 23 Jun 2016 23:28:14 -0700, Joy wrote: On 6/23/2016 8:42 PM, dgk wrote: On Thu, 23 Jun 2016 11:08:36 -0700, Joy wrote: On 6/23/2016 4:47 AM, dgk wrote: On Mon, 20 Jun 2016 19:05:54 +0100, "Christina Websell" wrote: But as I'm typing this I can see her walking down the hall so at least she is out looking the place over again. It's just three weeks short of a year since we arrived here. Well, maybe once I get the yard fenced and she can go out, she'll fall in love with the lizards and finally be happy again. Yes, I understand. You're considering her happiness. The reason everybody is telling you not to take her back is that we're considering her safety. For a good many years, I had a cat door and my cats could go in and out as they wished. My current cats have always been indoor cats, so that is no longer the case. Also, I understand there are now coyotes in the neighborhood, so I wouldn't let them out anyway. If your area is safe from predators, you might consider installing a cat door. Yes, it's always safety vs freedom. I just hate seeing her slink around when she used to run around so happily. I really thought that she would adapt much quicker. Is a long miserable life better than a shorter happy life? If I thought that she'd never be happy inside, I'd take her back today, but I do hold out hope. I don't think we have coyotes around, although supposedly we do, but I have seen foxes in my yard. Small ones, not much bigger than the catrs, but I do not want them in the yard at the same time. So there will be a cat door, but it will only be open when the yard is enclosed and during the daylight hours. And only when I'm home, and at the beginning, only when I'm out there with them. I understand everything you say. How long have you had her? Sorry, I was away for 10 days. I took her in almost exactly a year ago and moved to Florida the next week. If she's been with you that long, I wouldn't take her back and turn her loose. Too many things will have changed during that time. It does take some cats a long time to adjust. However, I think she's better off with you, and eventually she'll realize it. It will be good if you can create a space where she can go outdoors safely. |
#18
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He's come a long way, baby!
"dgk" wrote in message ... On Thu, 23 Jun 2016 11:08:36 -0700, Joy wrote: On 6/23/2016 4:47 AM, dgk wrote: On Mon, 20 Jun 2016 19:05:54 +0100, "Christina Websell" wrote: But as I'm typing this I can see her walking down the hall so at least she is out looking the place over again. It's just three weeks short of a year since we arrived here. Well, maybe once I get the yard fenced and she can go out, she'll fall in love with the lizards and finally be happy again. Yes, I understand. You're considering her happiness. The reason everybody is telling you not to take her back is that we're considering her safety. For a good many years, I had a cat door and my cats could go in and out as they wished. My current cats have always been indoor cats, so that is no longer the case. Also, I understand there are now coyotes in the neighborhood, so I wouldn't let them out anyway. If your area is safe from predators, you might consider installing a cat door. Yes, it's always safety vs freedom. I just hate seeing her slink around when she used to run around so happily. I really thought that she would adapt much quicker. Is a long miserable life better than a shorter happy life? If I thought that she'd never be happy inside, I'd take her back today, but I do hold out hope. I don't think we have coyotes around, although supposedly we do, but I have seen foxes in my yard. Small ones, not much bigger than the catrs, but I do not want them in the yard at the same time. So there will be a cat door, but it will only be open when the yard is enclosed and during the daylight hours. And only when I'm home, and at the beginning, only when I'm out there with them. That sounds like a good idea. I'm cautiously confident that she will adapt to the home eventually, but it does take a long time, a year wasn't enough for Boyfie, even though he wasn't a true feral it was more than two years, nearer three. Now I can hardly peel him off my lap. Give her more time and don't push her to be friendly, just go about about your business, speak kindly when you put her food down. Use a special word when you do and eventually you can use that word to get her to come out. I used to whistle 4 tones and now Boyfie will come in from the out if I do that. Just be patient, it's not easy and there's no short term fix. Let her hide if she wants to. I still don't disturb Boyfie if he's gone to his "own" bedroom even now. Don't expect Baby to ever be like socialised cats, she won't be. Lots of luck with her. Tweed |
#19
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He's come a long way, baby!
On Thu, 28 Jul 2016 02:33:33 +0100, "Christina Websell"
wrote: "dgk" wrote in message .. . On Thu, 23 Jun 2016 11:08:36 -0700, Joy wrote: On 6/23/2016 4:47 AM, dgk wrote: On Mon, 20 Jun 2016 19:05:54 +0100, "Christina Websell" wrote: But as I'm typing this I can see her walking down the hall so at least she is out looking the place over again. It's just three weeks short of a year since we arrived here. Well, maybe once I get the yard fenced and she can go out, she'll fall in love with the lizards and finally be happy again. Yes, I understand. You're considering her happiness. The reason everybody is telling you not to take her back is that we're considering her safety. For a good many years, I had a cat door and my cats could go in and out as they wished. My current cats have always been indoor cats, so that is no longer the case. Also, I understand there are now coyotes in the neighborhood, so I wouldn't let them out anyway. If your area is safe from predators, you might consider installing a cat door. Yes, it's always safety vs freedom. I just hate seeing her slink around when she used to run around so happily. I really thought that she would adapt much quicker. Is a long miserable life better than a shorter happy life? If I thought that she'd never be happy inside, I'd take her back today, but I do hold out hope. I don't think we have coyotes around, although supposedly we do, but I have seen foxes in my yard. Small ones, not much bigger than the catrs, but I do not want them in the yard at the same time. So there will be a cat door, but it will only be open when the yard is enclosed and during the daylight hours. And only when I'm home, and at the beginning, only when I'm out there with them. That sounds like a good idea. I'm cautiously confident that she will adapt to the home eventually, but it does take a long time, a year wasn't enough for Boyfie, even though he wasn't a true feral it was more than two years, nearer three. Now I can hardly peel him off my lap. Give her more time and don't push her to be friendly, just go about about your business, speak kindly when you put her food down. Use a special word when you do and eventually you can use that word to get her to come out. I used to whistle 4 tones and now Boyfie will come in from the out if I do that. Just be patient, it's not easy and there's no short term fix. Let her hide if she wants to. I still don't disturb Boyfie if he's gone to his "own" bedroom even now. Don't expect Baby to ever be like socialised cats, she won't be. Lots of luck with her. Tweed Thanks for the encouragement. And I think there is friction between Marlo and Baby that is causing Marlo's overgrooming issue. I think I'm going to speak to the "behavioral" vet specialist although it will cost at least $400. There is a $200 initial fee, plus someone comes to the house to look over the situation and make specific recommendations. Sounds like My Cat From Hell. |
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