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#11
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Joys of Business Travel (beverage warning)
"Howard C. Berkowitz" wrote in message ... The following letters are taken from an actual incident between a London hotel and one of it's guests. The Hotel ended up submitting the letters to the London Sunday Times! Dear Maid, Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and another three in the shower soap dish. They are in my way. Thank you, S. Berman snip Dear Mrs. Carmen, Just a short note to bring you up-to-date on my latest soap inventory. As of today I possess: - On the shelf under medicine cabinet - 18 Camay in 4 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2. - On the Kleenex dispenser - 11 Camay in 2 stacks of 4 and 1stack of 3. - On the bedroom dresser - 1 stack of 3 Cashmere Bouquet, - 1 stack of 4 hotel-size Ivory, and 8 Camay in 2 stacks of 4. - Inside the medicine cabinet - 14 Camay in 3 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2. - In the shower soap dish - 6 Camay, very moist. - On the northeast corner of tub - 1 Cashmere Bouquet, slightly used. - On the northwest corner of tub - 6 Camays in 2 stacks of 3. Please ask Kathy when she services my room to make sure the stacks are neatly piled and dusted. Also, please advise her that stacks of more than 4 have a tendency to tip. May I suggest that my bedroom window sill is not in use and will make an excellent spot for future soap deliveries. Potential for a new mathematical puzzle to compete with the Towers of Hanoi - the Soap Bars of the Savoy.... One more item, I have purchased another bar of bath-sized Dial which I am keeping in the hotel vault in order to avoid further misunderstandings S. Berman Hah! Me, I just use the regular bar of soap I bring with me (the little ones are pure hell to hang on to in the shower), stow it in the waterproof box in my suitcase bought for that purpose, and keep all the little bitty soaps, shampoos, etc provided by the management for inclusion in camping gear, emergency kits, whatever, where the size helps. Hospitals are great about this sort of thing - week before last, I came home with enough itty-bitty toilet articles to half-fill one of those plastic sacks they send you home with. -- Vance P. Frickey remove "nospam" from listed Email address to send mail "There is an uncomfortable similarity between Damocles, who had everything but security, and the West today. The main difference is that Damocles could see the sword that threatened him and the thin thread that restrained it, while today both sword and thread seem unreal to all too many." Herman Kahn, _On Thermonuclear War_. |
#12
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Joys of Business Travel (beverage warning)
"jmcquown" wrote in message ... wrote: Howard C. Berkowitz wrote: Dear Maid, Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and another three in the shower soap dish. They are in my way. Thank you, S. Berman This is such an oldie, it predates the Internet. I remember it when it was passed around offices on sheets of paper that were copies of copies of copies. Of course, it is still hilarious. I think that this guy AND the staff at that hotel all deserve each other!! Joyce I remember those days too, and when the typed up copies would spit out on fax machines from office to office. If I were the guy I'd have found another hotel!! Jill "living on Rolaids, battling hotel maids... " - "Miss You so Badly," Jimmy Buffett |
#13
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Joys of Business Travel (beverage warning)
"Fred J. McCall" wrote in message ... Dee wrote: :[Another] Dee wrote: : : This is a great bit, although it is authored. The "S. Berman" is Shelley : Berman, a stand-up comedian from the 1960's. He wrote this bit and : included it in his book "A Hotel is a Place...", published in 1972. : : Dee : :Note to all: : :We now have a second Dee in afh. This may end up somewhat confusing. :Perhaps the other Dee is only over in the cats group. Hi, Dee. :Welcome. Guess we will have to get people used to raiding the headers. : :--Dee from afh Two Dees? Hi Dee. Hi Dee. Ho! In the words of Theodore Roosevelt: "Dee-lighted!" |
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