whatsa ted?

soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

"Miss Violette" had some very interesting
things to say about whatsa ted?:

soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

Uh, Harri, I hate to tell you this, but you probably have a problem
here. TEDs are The Evil Doctors, those sick humans who make your human
take you in a metalmonster to a strange place that smells like other
animals and even weirder things. Then TED and his/her accomplices do
things like put thermometers [long cold thin glass sticks] in VERY
personal places things like that do NOT belong and stick you with
needles and sometimes put smelly icky stuff on your fur. They might
even make you swallow a pill or some awful-tasting liquid, or worst of
all, do something to make you sleep VERY deeply and when you wake up,
what wasn't broken is "fixed" and you're minus a couple of important
boycat parts.

Felix, who HATES TEDs

--
Felix, with help from his secretary/Mom

"Miss Violette" had some very interesting
things to say about whatsa ted?:

soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

Uh, Harri, I hate to tell you this, but you probably have a problem
here. TEDs are The Evil Doctors, those sick humans who make your human
take you in a metalmonster to a strange place that smells like other
animals and even weirder things. Then TED and his/her accomplices do
things like put thermometers [long cold thin glass sticks] in VERY
personal places things like that do NOT belong and stick you with
needles and sometimes put smelly icky stuff on your fur. They might
even make you swallow a pill or some awful-tasting liquid, or worst of
all, do something to make you sleep VERY deeply and when you wake up,
what wasn't broken is "fixed" and you're minus a couple of important
boycat parts.

Felix, who HATES TEDs

--
Felix, with help from his secretary/Mom

On Tue, 26 Oct 2004 06:40:58 -0700, Miss Violette wrote:

soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

Harri,

Dere iz sum tings best left unspoken. Buttid wen yourownself getz bak frum
TED, call me on my cell fone an' I'zl cum offur to cuddle your own
kittenself, OK?

--
Purrs,

Mlle. Anaïs
10/26/2004 1:00:53 PM
anais+at+electric-ink+dot+com

On Tue, 26 Oct 2004 06:40:58 -0700, Miss Violette wrote:

soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

Harri,

Dere iz sum tings best left unspoken. Buttid wen yourownself getz bak frum
TED, call me on my cell fone an' I'zl cum offur to cuddle your own
kittenself, OK?

--
Purrs,

Mlle. Anaïs
10/26/2004 1:00:53 PM
anais+at+electric-ink+dot+com

Miss Violette wrote:
soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

Oh, Harri... I'z sorry. TED is a evil, evil person who does nasty fings
to innocent liddle kitties. We'z will purr dat your trip to TED goes
furry quickly.

Tabitha

Miss Violette wrote:
soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

Oh, Harri... I'z sorry. TED is a evil, evil person who does nasty fings
to innocent liddle kitties. We'z will purr dat your trip to TED goes
furry quickly.

Tabitha

diz duz not sound atall gud, Harri, gettin catcerned
Cheryl Perkins wrote in message
...
Miss Violette wrote:
soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I
uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so
what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

TED is this evul, evul hoomin hoo lives inna playce that always smells
lyke othur cats an evun d*gs, and sumtymes yu kin see thu anymals an hasta
hissspit at them tu make them keep theer distance! TEDS duz furry rood
fings wif a glass stik an yur bak end, an iz always stikkin theer fingurs
were they duznt belong, lyke pressing them in yur stomak, or pryin yur
mouf opin or holdin yur eers still tu luk in them. Wurst case is that TED
stiks yu wif pointy fings or steels yu frum yur Meomie or PawPaw fur days
ana days ana days flashbak tu memries uv the tyme rite aftur that
metalmonstur dint get out uv hur way.

The purroper way tu behave wiv TED is tu bite, skratch, an yowl as loud as
yu can. I wunce yowled so much alla hoomins inna wating rum was wonderin
wat wuz goin on! Inna metalmonster onna way tu an frum TED, yowl evun more
and pee or wurse inna carryer.

Above all, du not beleef TED if he or she skritches yu round thu eers or
gives yu cat treets or sez fings lyke 'Wat a nize cat!'. They iz jus tryin
tu get yu offa yur gard. An yur hoomin will purrobly be onna side uv TED,
hoo iz also hoomin. Myne evun *APOLOGIZES* wen I stands up fur my rites!
She sez fings lyke 'She's really a nice cat, and doesn't behave like this
at home.' And she THANKS TED fur torchuring me! She evun finks TED had
sumfing tu du wif me gettin bedder aftur thu insident wif thu
metalmonstur, wich is nonsense! They locked me up inna caje inna rum wif
other cats I dint no, and did stranj things tu me, and I showed them hoo
wuz boss, cuz I wudnt eet eny uv thu fud they gave me! THAT showed them I
wuznt fuled by them saying fings like I hadda try this, an wud I like that
insted, jus lyke they wanted tu be nice!

Stay away frum TEDS if attal possibul.

Mandy, Unbiased Reporter Frum TED Office

diz duz not sound atall gud, Harri, gettin catcerned
Cheryl Perkins wrote in message
...
Miss Violette wrote:
soft sayed I hadda gotoda ted, Now I duzn't know what dis here iz, I
uses
mines litter box likez i iz spozed ta, nefur had efin one ssident, so
what
iz dis here ted anna why iz da ofur catz snickerin, Harri

TED is this evul, evul hoomin hoo lives inna playce that always smells
lyke othur cats an evun d*gs, and sumtymes yu kin see thu anymals an hasta
hissspit at them tu make them keep theer distance! TEDS duz furry rood
fings wif a glass stik an yur bak end, an iz always stikkin theer fingurs
were they duznt belong, lyke pressing them in yur stomak, or pryin yur
mouf opin or holdin yur eers still tu luk in them. Wurst case is that TED
stiks yu wif pointy fings or steels yu frum yur Meomie or PawPaw fur days
ana days ana days flashbak tu memries uv the tyme rite aftur that
metalmonstur dint get out uv hur way.

The purroper way tu behave wiv TED is tu bite, skratch, an yowl as loud as
yu can. I wunce yowled so much alla hoomins inna wating rum was wonderin
wat wuz goin on! Inna metalmonster onna way tu an frum TED, yowl evun more
and pee or wurse inna carryer.

Above all, du not beleef TED if he or she skritches yu round thu eers or
gives yu cat treets or sez fings lyke 'Wat a nize cat!'. They iz jus tryin
tu get yu offa yur gard. An yur hoomin will purrobly be onna side uv TED,
hoo iz also hoomin. Myne evun *APOLOGIZES* wen I stands up fur my rites!
She sez fings lyke 'She's really a nice cat, and doesn't behave like this
at home.' And she THANKS TED fur torchuring me! She evun finks TED had
sumfing tu du wif me gettin bedder aftur thu insident wif thu
metalmonstur, wich is nonsense! They locked me up inna caje inna rum wif
other cats I dint no, and did stranj things tu me, and I showed them hoo
wuz boss, cuz I wudnt eet eny uv thu fud they gave me! THAT showed them I
wuznt fuled by them saying fings like I hadda try this, an wud I like that
insted, jus lyke they wanted tu be nice!

Stay away frum TEDS if attal possibul.

Mandy, Unbiased Reporter Frum TED Office

deze two hoomanz luk purty smart fur hoomanz, wonner why dey wuuld takez
minesself ta ted ifin he isa so mean, Harri, confuzzled and catcerned
Seanette Blaylock wrote in message
...
Cheryl Perkins had some very interesting things to
say about whatsa ted?:

Above all, du not beleef TED if he or she skritches yu round thu eers or
gives yu cat treets or sez fings lyke 'Wat a nize cat!'. They iz jus
tryin
tu get yu offa yur gard. An yur hoomin will purrobly be onna side uv TED,
hoo iz also hoomin. Myne evun *APOLOGIZES* wen I stands up fur my rites!
She sez fings lyke 'She's really a nice cat, and doesn't behave like this
at home.' And she THANKS TED fur torchuring me! She evun finks TED had
sumfing tu du wif me gettin bedder aftur thu insident wif thu
metalmonstur, wich is nonsense! They locked me up inna caje inna rum wif
other cats I dint no, and did stranj things tu me, and I showed them hoo
wuz boss, cuz I wudnt eet eny uv thu fud they gave me! THAT showed them I
wuznt fuled by them saying fings like I hadda try this, an wud I like
that
insted, jus lyke they wanted tu be nice!
Stay away frum TEDS if attal possibul.

TEDs are really sneaky. The one I used to have to go to actually had
my Mom [who's normally pretty smart for a human] thinking he *liked*
animals!

Felix, advising kittens to NEVER trust a TED

--
Felix, with help from his secretary/Mom