Variable Weight?

Years ago I read somewhere (not in this newsgroup) that cats are able to
vary their weight according to circumstance. I believe it.

Here on the eastern coast of the Florida peninsula, older houses (in one
of which I live) are built of what is called CBS construction - that's
cinder blocks on a slab of concrete. The carpet has been in place for
nearly twenty years and the padding under it is, um, a bit compacted.

The "variable weight theory" is the only way I can explain how a single
black-and-white cat, who can otherwise ghost through the house making as
much noise as a shadow, can sound like a whole *herd* of elephants as
she gallops down the hall!

Baird

--
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice
there is. -Yogi Berra

"Baird Stafford" wrote in message

Years ago I read somewhere (not in this newsgroup) that cats are able
to vary their weight according to circumstance. I believe it.

Here on the eastern coast of the Florida peninsula, older houses (in
one of which I live) are built of what is called CBS construction -
that's cinder blocks on a slab of concrete. The carpet has been in
place for nearly twenty years and the padding under it is, um, a bit
compacted.

The "variable weight theory" is the only way I can explain how a
single black-and-white cat, who can otherwise ghost through the house
making as much noise as a shadow, can sound like a whole *herd* of
elephants as she gallops down the hall!

A well known feline phenomenon, I think its because cats are much like
iceburgs in that they are four (or more) dimensional beings and only a small
amount of their true selves appears in our three dimensional world, and they
can exert at least some control of how much appears. It explains the 'herd
of elephants stampeding across the Serengeti' phenomenon as you describe
above, why they absolutely cannot be found an hour before their veterinary
appointment, how they can't be possibly fit into a carrier designed to cart
*two* cats when finally found to go to their veterinary appointment, and how
a tiny iddy biddy kitten can spread out to take up enough of a queen size
bed so that the occupant of said bed - a slight person in their own right -
still has to sleep awkwardly.

I suspect that this is metaphysical revenge for Schrodinger's thought
experiment. If only he'd used a hypothetical dog instead.

Yowie
--
If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many
pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, icecream doesn't have bones.