I wants da sheriff NOW

Der I wuz sleepink on top of da cold box. I was aweepink so I didn’t know
mine fanny and tayle waz hankink offer da edge of da door. At free in da
mornink Gramby rudliee opens da frezer door, said her needed sum ize. Well,
she dumped me on da floor and I hizzed at herselfz. U wud fink her wud
learn, diz iz da sekond time her did diz.

In my own defense, this is something new Willow has started to do. The
first time I don't know if it scared her or me the most. Last night it was
78 at three in the morning and humidity matched. I went to get some ice to
put in my water and WHAM a cat fell, knocking the glass out of my hand.
Didn't break but she hissed something awful at me and, I must confess, I
hissed something awful back at her.

Don’t kare whut her sayz I wantz da sheriff to bestigate deze acktionz. Diz
jus iznt rite.

dear willow,

i hasz diz prolem wif bof of mine hoominz, i likez da top of da kowde box, i
admitz i likez takin inbentoree inna kowder purt anna shoppin inna warmer
purt... butt when i goez onna top ta takea nap one of dem uzulee innerptz
juzt wen da sleepin iz gud...i duzint unnerstand why da hoominz duzint leaf
owrz thingz alone when we iz uzin dem...

chester, who haz feleed urown painz
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
Der I wuz sleepink on top of da cold box. I was aweepink so I didn't know
mine fanny and tayle waz hankink offer da edge of da door. At free in da
mornink Gramby rudliee opens da frezer door, said her needed sum ize.
Well, she dumped me on da floor and I hizzed at herselfz. U wud fink her
wud learn, diz iz da sekond time her did diz.

In my own defense, this is something new Willow has started to do. The
first time I don't know if it scared her or me the most. Last night it
was 78 at three in the morning and humidity matched. I went to get some
ice to put in my water and WHAM a cat fell, knocking the glass out of my
hand. Didn't break but she hissed something awful at me and, I must
confess, I hissed something awful back at her.

Don't kare whut her sayz I wantz da sheriff to bestigate deze acktionz.
Diz jus iznt rite.

We muss be depurrived heer, kuz we kant git on toppa owr kold bokz. Itz in
itz own liddle kubbyhole wif not enuf rum fur a kittee to git up dere.

Sundance, who never realized he was missing out on this

"Storrmmee" wrote in message
...
dear willow,

i hasz diz prolem wif bof of mine hoominz, i likez da top of da kowde box,
i admitz i likez takin inbentoree inna kowder purt anna shoppin inna
warmer purt... butt when i goez onna top ta takea nap one of dem uzulee
innerptz juzt wen da sleepin iz gud...i duzint unnerstand why da hoominz
duzint leaf owrz thingz alone when we iz uzin dem...

chester, who haz feleed urown painz
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
Der I wuz sleepink on top of da cold box. I was aweepink so I didn't
know mine fanny and tayle waz hankink offer da edge of da door. At free
in da mornink Gramby rudliee opens da frezer door, said her needed sum
ize. Well, she dumped me on da floor and I hizzed at herselfz. U wud
fink her wud learn, diz iz da sekond time her did diz.

In my own defense, this is something new Willow has started to do. The
first time I don't know if it scared her or me the most. Last night it
was 78 at three in the morning and humidity matched. I went to get some
ice to put in my water and WHAM a cat fell, knocking the glass out of my
hand. Didn't break but she hissed something awful at me and, I must
confess, I hissed something awful back at her.

Don't kare whut her sayz I wantz da sheriff to bestigate deze acktionz.
Diz jus iznt rite.

Diz iz seryuz!
I yam pinging da folowing tu tayke akshun!:
Sheriff of the Catmerica Police Department ... Rosco P. Catrane
Deputy Assistant to Sheriff ... Rowan
Deputy Chief Inspektor ... Sundance
Police Dispatcher ... Little Kitty
Inbeztigcate dz sit2yu-ay-shun attid wunz
Reed awl tesrtimony kayerfoolee, den repurrt tu

Chief Justicat ... Samuel Redcat Mahoney hoo wyl reetsh uh verdikt
..
Pitô.ônya, Grand "take Charge " Pooh-Bah


"Sundance" wrote in message
...
We muss be depurrived heer, kuz we kant git on toppa owr kold bokz.
Itz in itz own liddle kubbyhole wif not enuf rum fur a kittee to git
up dere.

Sundance, who never realized he was missing out on this

"Storrmmee" wrote in message
...
dear willow,

i hasz diz prolem wif bof of mine hoominz, i likez da top of da kowde
box, i admitz i likez takin inbentoree inna kowder purt anna shoppin
inna warmer purt... butt when i goez onna top ta takea nap one of dem
uzulee innerptz juzt wen da sleepin iz gud...i duzint unnerstand why
da hoominz duzint leaf owrz thingz alone when we iz uzin dem...

chester, who haz feleed urown painz
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
Der I wuz sleepink on top of da cold box. I was aweepink so I
didn't know mine fanny and tayle waz hankink offer da edge of da
door. At free in da mornink Gramby rudliee opens da frezer door,
said her needed sum ize. Well, she dumped me on da floor and I
hizzed at herselfz. U wud fink her wud learn, diz iz da sekond time
her did diz.

In my own defense, this is something new Willow has started to do.
The first time I don't know if it scared her or me the most. Last
night it was 78 at three in the morning and humidity matched. I
went to get some ice to put in my water and WHAM a cat fell,
knocking the glass out of my hand. Didn't break but she hissed
something awful at me and, I must confess, I hissed something awful
back at her.

Don't kare whut her sayz I wantz da sheriff to bestigate deze
acktionz. Diz jus iznt rite.

ursef sur iz mizzin owt, becalwz inna winter izt lotsa lotsa warmer up der,
chester
"Sundance" wrote in message
...
We muss be depurrived heer, kuz we kant git on toppa owr kold bokz. Itz in
itz own liddle kubbyhole wif not enuf rum fur a kittee to git up dere.

Sundance, who never realized he was missing out on this

"Storrmmee" wrote in message
...
dear willow,

i hasz diz prolem wif bof of mine hoominz, i likez da top of da kowde
box, i admitz i likez takin inbentoree inna kowder purt anna shoppin inna
warmer purt... butt when i goez onna top ta takea nap one of dem uzulee
innerptz juzt wen da sleepin iz gud...i duzint unnerstand why da hoominz
duzint leaf owrz thingz alone when we iz uzin dem...

chester, who haz feleed urown painz
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
Der I wuz sleepink on top of da cold box. I was aweepink so I didn't
know mine fanny and tayle waz hankink offer da edge of da door. At free
in da mornink Gramby rudliee opens da frezer door, said her needed sum
ize. Well, she dumped me on da floor and I hizzed at herselfz. U wud
fink her wud learn, diz iz da sekond time her did diz.

In my own defense, this is something new Willow has started to do. The
first time I don't know if it scared her or me the most. Last night it
was 78 at three in the morning and humidity matched. I went to get some
ice to put in my water and WHAM a cat fell, knocking the glass out of my
hand. Didn't break but she hissed something awful at me and, I must
confess, I hissed something awful back at her.

Don't kare whut her sayz I wantz da sheriff to bestigate deze acktionz.
Diz jus iznt rite.

diz iza wunnerful defelopmint, chester
"Pi2nya AKA Sweetee" wrote in message
...
Diz iz seryuz!
I yam pinging da folowing tu tayke akshun!:
Sheriff of the Catmerica Police Department ... Rosco P. Catrane
Deputy Assistant to Sheriff ... Rowan
Deputy Chief Inspektor ... Sundance
Police Dispatcher ... Little Kitty
Inbeztigcate dz sit2yu-ay-shun attid wunz
Reed awl tesrtimony kayerfoolee, den repurrt tu

Chief Justicat ... Samuel Redcat Mahoney hoo wyl reetsh uh verdikt
.
Pitô.ônya, Grand "take Charge " Pooh-Bah


"Sundance" wrote in message
...
We muss be depurrived heer, kuz we kant git on toppa owr kold bokz. Itz
in itz own liddle kubbyhole wif not enuf rum fur a kittee to git up dere.

Sundance, who never realized he was missing out on this

"Storrmmee" wrote in message
...
dear willow,

i hasz diz prolem wif bof of mine hoominz, i likez da top of da kowde
box, i admitz i likez takin inbentoree inna kowder purt anna shoppin
inna warmer purt... butt when i goez onna top ta takea nap one of dem
uzulee innerptz juzt wen da sleepin iz gud...i duzint unnerstand why da
hoominz duzint leaf owrz thingz alone when we iz uzin dem...

chester, who haz feleed urown painz
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
Der I wuz sleepink on top of da cold box. I was aweepink so I didn't
know mine fanny and tayle waz hankink offer da edge of da door. At
free in da mornink Gramby rudliee opens da frezer door, said her needed
sum ize. Well, she dumped me on da floor and I hizzed at herselfz. U
wud fink her wud learn, diz iz da sekond time her did diz.

In my own defense, this is something new Willow has started to do. The
first time I don't know if it scared her or me the most. Last night it
was 78 at three in the morning and humidity matched. I went to get
some ice to put in my water and WHAM a cat fell, knocking the glass out
of my hand. Didn't break but she hissed something awful at me and, I
must confess, I hissed something awful back at her.

Don't kare whut her sayz I wantz da sheriff to bestigate deze acktionz.
Diz jus iznt rite.

I preziagez diz acktion. Willow taking pictures and gathering her testimony
for da sheriff.

"Storrmmee" wrote in message ...

diz iza wunnerful defelopmint, chester
"Pi2nya AKA Sweetee" wrote in message
...
Diz iz seryuz!
I yam pinging da folowing tu tayke akshun!:
Sheriff of the Catmerica Police Department ... Rosco P. Catrane
Deputy Assistant to Sheriff ... Rowan
Deputy Chief Inspektor ... Sundance
Police Dispatcher ... Little Kitty
Inbeztigcate dz sit2yu-ay-shun attid wunz
Reed awl tesrtimony kayerfoolee, den repurrt tu

Chief Justicat ... Samuel Redcat Mahoney hoo wyl reetsh uh verdikt
.
Pitô.ônya, Grand "take Charge " Pooh-Bah


"Sundance" wrote in message
...
We muss be depurrived heer, kuz we kant git on toppa owr kold bokz. Itz
in itz own liddle kubbyhole wif not enuf rum fur a kittee to git up dere.

Sundance, who never realized he was missing out on this

"Storrmmee" wrote in message
...
dear willow,

i hasz diz prolem wif bof of mine hoominz, i likez da top of da kowde
box, i admitz i likez takin inbentoree inna kowder purt anna shoppin
inna warmer purt... butt when i goez onna top ta takea nap one of dem
uzulee innerptz juzt wen da sleepin iz gud...i duzint unnerstand why da
hoominz duzint leaf owrz thingz alone when we iz uzin dem...

chester, who haz feleed urown painz
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
Der I wuz sleepink on top of da cold box. I was aweepink so I didn't
know mine fanny and tayle waz hankink offer da edge of da door. At
free in da mornink Gramby rudliee opens da frezer door, said her needed
sum ize. Well, she dumped me on da floor and I hizzed at herselfz. U
wud fink her wud learn, diz iz da sekond time her did diz.

In my own defense, this is something new Willow has started to do. The
first time I don't know if it scared her or me the most. Last night it
was 78 at three in the morning and humidity matched. I went to get
some ice to put in my water and WHAM a cat fell, knocking the glass out
of my hand. Didn't break but she hissed something awful at me and, I
must confess, I hissed something awful back at her.

Don't kare whut her sayz I wantz da sheriff to bestigate deze acktionz.
Diz jus iznt rite.

i willz duz diz awso, chester
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
I preziagez diz acktion. Willow taking pictures and gathering her
testimony for da sheriff.

"Storrmmee" wrote in message ...

diz iza wunnerful defelopmint, chester
"Pi2nya AKA Sweetee" wrote in message
...
Diz iz seryuz!
I yam pinging da folowing tu tayke akshun!:
Sheriff of the Catmerica Police Department ... Rosco P. Catrane
Deputy Assistant to Sheriff ... Rowan
Deputy Chief Inspektor ... Sundance
Police Dispatcher ... Little Kitty
Inbeztigcate dz sit2yu-ay-shun attid wunz
Reed awl tesrtimony kayerfoolee, den repurrt tu

Chief Justicat ... Samuel Redcat Mahoney hoo wyl reetsh uh verdikt
.
Pitô.ônya, Grand "take Charge " Pooh-Bah


"Sundance" wrote in message
...
We muss be depurrived heer, kuz we kant git on toppa owr kold bokz. Itz
in itz own liddle kubbyhole wif not enuf rum fur a kittee to git up
dere.

Sundance, who never realized he was missing out on this

"Storrmmee" wrote in message
...
dear willow,

i hasz diz prolem wif bof of mine hoominz, i likez da top of da kowde
box, i admitz i likez takin inbentoree inna kowder purt anna shoppin
inna warmer purt... butt when i goez onna top ta takea nap one of dem
uzulee innerptz juzt wen da sleepin iz gud...i duzint unnerstand why da
hoominz duzint leaf owrz thingz alone when we iz uzin dem...

chester, who haz feleed urown painz
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
Der I wuz sleepink on top of da cold box. I was aweepink so I didn't
know mine fanny and tayle waz hankink offer da edge of da door. At
free in da mornink Gramby rudliee opens da frezer door, said her
needed sum ize. Well, she dumped me on da floor and I hizzed at
herselfz. U wud fink her wud learn, diz iz da sekond time her did
diz.

In my own defense, this is something new Willow has started to do. The
first time I don't know if it scared her or me the most. Last night
it was 78 at three in the morning and humidity matched. I went to get
some ice to put in my water and WHAM a cat fell, knocking the glass
out of my hand. Didn't break but she hissed something awful at me and,
I must confess, I hissed something awful back at her.

Don't kare whut her sayz I wantz da sheriff to bestigate deze
acktionz. Diz jus iznt rite.

[Sundance ports into Gramby's house]

Hello, Miss Willow. Depity Cheef Inspektagator Sundance heer. Yoo sez dat
yoo wuz up on da kold box sleepin, an yoo wuz hangin over da edj? Yoo wuz
obveeusly tryin to make shur yoo keeped trak uv whut yurown hoomin wuz
eetin -- furry impurrtint when da hoomin haz had hart purroblimz. After
analyzin yurown repurrt, I beleev dat da hoomin iz gilty ov da followin:

1. She did not see yurownself on toppa da kold bokz

2. She did not akz purrmishin to opin da bokz

3. She did not put a sof kushin on da flor in frunt ov da kold bokz in kase
yoo ever felled off

4. She inneruptid yurown sleep

5. Wunce she reelized whut she had dun, she did not imeediatly offer food
tribyoot to make up fur it

6. She did not keep ennee ice owtside uv da kold bokz so dat she kud git it
wifowt disturbin yurownself

7. Possiblee worstest uv awl, she hissed at yurownself

Duz yoo hav enneefing to add to yurown repurrt?

Sined,
Sundance, Deputy Chief Inspektagator

Nuffin to add sir cept, her laader laffed bout when tellink Auntie Soft.
Her klamed to knot kno who waz most startled. I kan tell yourself I was,
after allz I waz sleepink and her waznt.

"Sundance" wrote in message ...

[Sundance ports into Gramby's house]

Hello, Miss Willow. Depity Cheef Inspektagator Sundance heer. Yoo sez dat
yoo wuz up on da kold box sleepin, an yoo wuz hangin over da edj? Yoo wuz
obveeusly tryin to make shur yoo keeped trak uv whut yurown hoomin wuz
eetin -- furry impurrtint when da hoomin haz had hart purroblimz. After
analyzin yurown repurrt, I beleev dat da hoomin iz gilty ov da followin:

1. She did not see yurownself on toppa da kold bokz

2. She did not akz purrmishin to opin da bokz

3. She did not put a sof kushin on da flor in frunt ov da kold bokz in kase
yoo ever felled off

4. She inneruptid yurown sleep

5. Wunce she reelized whut she had dun, she did not imeediatly offer food
tribyoot to make up fur it

6. She did not keep ennee ice owtside uv da kold bokz so dat she kud git it
wifowt disturbin yurownself

7. Possiblee worstest uv awl, she hissed at yurownself

Duz yoo hav enneefing to add to yurown repurrt?

Sined,
Sundance, Deputy Chief Inspektagator