[mostly OT] My drunken neighbor

My next-door neighbor has been on a drunken binge for the past 3
days. I live in an apartment building - a smallish one, 4 units, two
upstairs, two downstairs. I'm in one of the upstairs ones, and he is
in the other. He lives with a female partner (don't know if they're
legally married) and their two cats.

They aren't sociable people, but they've always been very polite and
neighborly. In particular, the guy has shown a lot of concern about
Smudge when she's had her various escapades. Their two cats appear to
be healthy and, while a bit shy, certainly not terrorized or seeming
to be victims of abuse.

A couple of days ago, I woke up to loud banging, but by the time I'd
hauled my groggy butt out of bed, it had stopped. While I was making
breakfast, I heard more banging outside the back door - I opened it to
find my female neighbor outside trying to get in. She said, "The doofus
is drunk, and locked the screen door, and now I can't get in." That
was the first clue I had of what was to come.

Later, I was on my front balcony, painting some shelves, when I heard
the guy ranting and raving. It was coherent but still bizarre, all
about religion and politics, as far as I could tell. It didn't seem like
he was yelling at the woman. Occasionally I'd hear banging. He was clearly
in a rage. This went on for hours, and continued until late at night.

Then yesterday, same thing. I left the house in the early afternoon, and
didn't come home until late, so didn't have to deal with much of it, but
it was still going on sporadically. And I was woken up in the middle of
the night a couple of times by the banging and crashing. (Sometimes it
sounded like he was pounding something at regular intervals with his fist,
and other times, it sounded like he was throwing or knocking over heavy
objects that would crash loudly and shake the house.)

Today it's quiet. Maybe he's sobering up and has a hangover, or maybe
he went to work. She is home - I saw her earlier. (I had let Smudge out
and Smudge went over to their door - the front door was open but the
screen door was shut, so she peered in to annoy their cats. I could
hear the neighbor cat meowing, which tells me that their cats are, at
least, OK.) When my (female) neighbor saw Smudge, she came outside onto
the balcony, and we had a brief conversation. She didn't look hurt or
particularly traumatized, so at first glance, it doesn't seem as
though her partner is abusing *her*. I wanted to ask if she was OK, but
to be honest, I'm *afraid* to get involved because I live alone and I
feel vulnerable. However, I plan to talk to my other neighbors and I
will see what they think.

My kitties were unnerved by all the noise. Licky kept running under
the bed and just looking like he was about to bolt any second. Roxy
has come up to me a number of times looking for reassurance. Smudge
seems mostly unperturbed, but occasionally would get startled. She is
easily calmed by some petting and "it's OK, Smudgie." Now who is going
to calm me??

Joyce
--
To send email to this address, remove the triple-X from my user name.

I would have called the police. I"m sorry but that is disturbing the peace.

wrote in message
...
My next-door neighbor has been on a drunken binge for the past 3
days. I live in an apartment building - a smallish one, 4 units, two
upstairs, two downstairs. I'm in one of the upstairs ones, and he is
in the other. He lives with a female partner (don't know if they're
legally married) and their two cats.

They aren't sociable people, but they've always been very polite and
neighborly. In particular, the guy has shown a lot of concern about
Smudge when she's had her various escapades. Their two cats appear to
be healthy and, while a bit shy, certainly not terrorized or seeming
to be victims of abuse.

A couple of days ago, I woke up to loud banging, but by the time I'd
hauled my groggy butt out of bed, it had stopped. While I was making
breakfast, I heard more banging outside the back door - I opened it to
find my female neighbor outside trying to get in. She said, "The doofus
is drunk, and locked the screen door, and now I can't get in." That
was the first clue I had of what was to come.

Later, I was on my front balcony, painting some shelves, when I heard
the guy ranting and raving. It was coherent but still bizarre, all
about religion and politics, as far as I could tell. It didn't seem like
he was yelling at the woman. Occasionally I'd hear banging. He was clearly
in a rage. This went on for hours, and continued until late at night.

Then yesterday, same thing. I left the house in the early afternoon, and
didn't come home until late, so didn't have to deal with much of it, but
it was still going on sporadically. And I was woken up in the middle of
the night a couple of times by the banging and crashing. (Sometimes it
sounded like he was pounding something at regular intervals with his fist,
and other times, it sounded like he was throwing or knocking over heavy
objects that would crash loudly and shake the house.)

Today it's quiet. Maybe he's sobering up and has a hangover, or maybe
he went to work. She is home - I saw her earlier. (I had let Smudge out
and Smudge went over to their door - the front door was open but the
screen door was shut, so she peered in to annoy their cats. I could
hear the neighbor cat meowing, which tells me that their cats are, at
least, OK.) When my (female) neighbor saw Smudge, she came outside onto
the balcony, and we had a brief conversation. She didn't look hurt or
particularly traumatized, so at first glance, it doesn't seem as
though her partner is abusing *her*. I wanted to ask if she was OK, but
to be honest, I'm *afraid* to get involved because I live alone and I
feel vulnerable. However, I plan to talk to my other neighbors and I
will see what they think.

My kitties were unnerved by all the noise. Licky kept running under
the bed and just looking like he was about to bolt any second. Roxy
has come up to me a number of times looking for reassurance. Smudge
seems mostly unperturbed, but occasionally would get startled. She is
easily calmed by some petting and "it's OK, Smudgie." Now who is going
to calm me??

Joyce
--
To send email to this address, remove the triple-X from my user name.

wrote in message
...
My next-door neighbor has been on a drunken binge for the past
3
days. ...

My kitties were unnerved by all the noise. ... ...Smudge
seems mostly unperturbed, but occasionally would get startled.
She is
easily calmed by some petting and "it's OK, Smudgie." Now who
is going
to calm me??


WE are, friends on this group, with the power of purr. Soothing
purrs on their way. Distance is no barrier to the power of purr.

--
MatSav

On 2007-12-26, penned:

Today it's quiet. Maybe he's sobering up and has a hangover, or
maybe he went to work.

Wow. Purrs for everyone involved -- yes, even this guy, since he must
be deeply troubled by *something*.

--
monique, who spoils Oscar unmercifully

pictures: http://www.bounceswoosh.org/rpca

Monique Y. Mudama wrote:

On 2007-12-26, penned:

Today it's quiet. Maybe he's sobering up and has a hangover, or
maybe he went to work.

Wow. Purrs for everyone involved -- yes, even this guy, since he must
be deeply troubled by *something*.

Well, yeah. Nobody becomes a raging drunk becuase they're happy, do
they? It would be a lot easier for me to have compassion at a bit more
of a distance, though. :-/

Thanks,
Joyce
--
To send email to this address, remove the triple-X from my user name.

On 2007-12-27, penned:
Monique Y. Mudama wrote:

On 2007-12-26, penned:

Today it's quiet. Maybe he's sobering up and has a hangover, or
maybe he went to work.

Wow. Purrs for everyone involved -- yes, even this guy, since he
must be deeply troubled by *something*.

Well, yeah. Nobody becomes a raging drunk becuase they're happy, do
they? It would be a lot easier for me to have compassion at a bit
more of a distance, though. :-/


No doubt! Much easier here from the luxury of my desk. I would be a
trembling mess if all that noise were happening near me, I think -- I
don't handle others' expressions of raw anger very well.

At least it sounds like he didn't hurt any living creature while on
his tear? I hope that's the case.

--
monique, who spoils Oscar unmercifully

pictures: http://www.bounceswoosh.org/rpca

On Dec 26, 1:39*pm, wrote:
My next-door neighbor has been on a drunken binge for the past 3
days. I live in an apartment building - a smallish one, 4 units, two
upstairs, two downstairs. I'm in one of the upstairs ones, and he is
in the other. He lives with a female partner (don't know if they're
legally married) and their two cats.

They aren't sociable people, but they've always been very polite and
neighborly. In particular, the guy has shown a lot of concern about
Smudge when she's had her various escapades. Their two cats appear to
be healthy and, while a bit shy, certainly not terrorized or seeming
to be victims of abuse.

A couple of days ago, I woke up to loud banging, but by the time I'd
hauled my groggy butt out of bed, it had stopped. While I was making
breakfast, I heard more banging outside the back door - I opened it to
find my female neighbor outside trying to get in. She said, "The doofus
is drunk, and locked the screen door, and now I can't get in." That
was the first clue I had of what was to come.

Later, I was on my front balcony, painting some shelves, when I heard
the guy ranting and raving. It was coherent but still bizarre, all
about religion and politics, as far as I could tell. It didn't seem like
he was yelling at the woman. Occasionally I'd hear banging. He was clearly
in a rage. This went on for hours, and continued until late at night.

Then yesterday, same thing. I left the house in the early afternoon, and
didn't come home until late, so didn't have to deal with much of it, but
it was still going on sporadically. And I was woken up in the middle of
the night a couple of times by the banging and crashing. (Sometimes it
sounded like he was pounding something at regular intervals with his fist,
and other times, it sounded like he was throwing or knocking over heavy
objects that would crash loudly and shake the house.)

Today it's quiet. Maybe he's sobering up and has a hangover, or maybe
he went to work. She is home - I saw her earlier. (I had let Smudge out
and Smudge went over to their door - the front door was open but the
screen door was shut, so she peered in to annoy their cats. I could
hear the neighbor cat meowing, which tells me that their cats are, at
least, OK.) When my (female) neighbor saw Smudge, she came outside onto
the balcony, and we had a brief conversation. She didn't look hurt or
particularly traumatized, so at first glance, it doesn't seem as
though her partner is abusing *her*. I wanted to ask if she was OK, but
to be honest, I'm *afraid* to get involved because I live alone and I
feel vulnerable. However, I plan to talk to my other neighbors and I
will see what they think.

My kitties were unnerved by all the noise. Licky kept running under
the bed and just looking like he was about to bolt any second. Roxy
has come up to me a number of times looking for reassurance. Smudge
seems mostly unperturbed, but occasionally would get startled. She is
easily calmed by some petting and "it's OK, Smudgie." Now who is going
to calm me??

Joyce
--
To send email to this address, remove the triple-X from my user name.

I'm sorry you had such a stressful Christmas, Joyce. Not fun to be the
captive audience of someone else's alcoholic emotional melt-down. I
have to admit, that if I'd been there, I'd have done what Karen
recommended and called the police. Both for your sake, the woman's
sake and even the drunken neighbor's sake--maybe he'd have dried out a
few hours earlier if he'd realized how disturbing it actually was to
his neighbors. The police have more experience dealing with loud and
obstreporous drunks, and even if he hadn't dried out, at least you
wouldn't have had to listen to the whole thing.

Melissa

Monique Y. Mudama wrote:

No doubt! Much easier here from the luxury of my desk. I would be a
trembling mess if all that noise were happening near me, I think -- I
don't handle others' expressions of raw anger very well.

At least it sounds like he didn't hurt any living creature while on
his tear? I hope that's the case.

Seems that way. But there's still a bit of banging going on. It's not
carpentry or anything like that. It's much more random. Plus, the
occasional yelling is a clue.

Joyce
--
To send email to this address, remove the triple-X from my user name.

Shiral wrote:

I'm sorry you had such a stressful Christmas, Joyce. Not fun to be the
captive audience of someone else's alcoholic emotional melt-down. I
have to admit, that if I'd been there, I'd have done what Karen
recommended and called the police. Both for your sake, the woman's
sake and even the drunken neighbor's sake--maybe he'd have dried out a
few hours earlier if he'd realized how disturbing it actually was to
his neighbors. The police have more experience dealing with loud and
obstreporous drunks, and even if he hadn't dried out, at least you
wouldn't have had to listen to the whole thing.

I know that was an option, but I was kind of chickensh*t to call - I
didn't want them to know it was me and retaliate later.

Joyce
--
To send email to this address, remove the triple-X from my user name.

wrote:
My next-door neighbor has been on a drunken binge for the past 3
days. snip

Later, I was on my front balcony, painting some shelves, when I heard
the guy ranting and raving. It was coherent but still bizarre, all
about religion and politics, as far as I could tell. It didn't seem like
he was yelling at the woman. Occasionally I'd hear banging. He was clearly
in a rage. This went on for hours, and continued until late at night.

I'm astonished at your patience! Long before it reached
that point, I would have had the police paying him a visit
(more than one, if the first call had no effect). If he's
disturbing your peace, "drunk and disorderly" isn't a charge
confined to public places, you know. We all like to get
along with our neighbors, but that's a two-way street - it
requires mutual consideration of each other's rights.
Whatever set him off, it doesn't sound as though a "polite"
request would do much good, so perhaps a "police" request
will be more effective.