3 Prince Alberts

Exrxes News Network wrote:
"MR.Fixiit13 My Lee Starns My Buddy 1.TroubleMaker4ev87"
wrote in message
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I know Prince Albert of Monacco and Britian I forget yhe 3 Albert and
where he lives does anyone know Please?

Thank you so, Much!

Donnie






My sincere apologies - in one of my ever more recurring senior moments, I
forgot the obligatory cross-posts! Please forgive me,

Let's try again:


[orgiginal reply]


Thank you, Donnie, I'm glad you asked.


You are, of course, referring to Prince Albert Forgebrass, eldest son and
heir apparent of the sprightly 108 year old monarch of Grimmclogge, King
Percy Forgebrass lV.

Perhaps predictably, the wider world has never officially recognised the
Forgebrass claim to be directly descended from the 7th century Saxon king,
Ultha - a warrior held in such high regard by the Danes that he was allowed
to retain his crown and complete control of his Grimmclogge estates, even
during the Danelaw period

The Venerable Gorith, wring in his 8th Century 'Booke Of Wysdome', mentions
Ultha, and attributes his good standing with the invading Danes to the fact
that he (Ultha) once rescued Orthon, the youngest son of King Halfdan, who
was cornered alone in a small grove by a group of Saxon sodomites in 618 AD

According to Gorith, the young Orthon (popularly known as 'Orthon the
Unwilling') "was much tayken wyth terror and vaynely dyd entreet the brutysh
sodomyites that they shouldst spayre hymme that whych they in theyre bestial
lustying did presuyme to do uponne hymme"

However, it appeared that the Sodomites, led by one, Mandulsunne the
Luxurious (so named because of his fondness for living in comfort at the
expense of others) scorned young Orthon's pleas for mercy - and it is clear
that the youth would have been buggered beyond recognition had it not been
for the timely arrival of Ultha - who slew that sodomites with the leg bone
of a rabbit that happened to be lying near the entrance to the grove.

As a reward, Ultha was allowed to retain his crown and estates in
perpetuity - his heirs being even granted an exemption from the Norman's
doomsday
records.

The lineage was generally recognised throughout the ages by local
Grimmclogge folk - and, in fact, it wasn't until the socialists took power
in 1945 that any serious attempts were made to undermine the legitimacy of
the Forgebrass claim to the throne.

Sadly, the years ensuing from that lamentable socialist 'triumph' have
heaped indignity upon indignity for the house of Forgebrass. Perhaps the
most studied insult of all came in 1963 when the Grimmclogge Borough Council
(stuffed full of Marxist riff-raff) voted overwhelmingly for the
construction of new public toilets on the generally accepted site of Ultha's
victory over the sodomites.

Few believe that the location was an accidental choice! - rather, it was a
carefully calculated mockery of all that Ultha stood for, attracting as they
were intended so to do, sodomites from miles around to engage in detestable
practices, both inside and outside the toilet cubicles!

Following the construction of the toilets (or 'Sodomy Centre', as the
present King Percy described them in an angry letter to the Grimmclogge
Chronicle in 1964) an annual pilgrimage to the toilets was instituted, in
order to try and keep wholesome memories alive - and, as King Percy's
personal Chaplain, the Reverend Stapleton S Love, put it, "To try and lend a
spiritual dimension to this squalid hell-hole"

Fairly well attended by local people at first, the number of pilgrims
gradually dwindled until, eventually, only King Percy, Prince Albert, and an
occasional reporter, bothered to turn up.

According to my records, the last pilgrimage was held in 2001 - when the
frail 101 year old King struggled to make himself heard over the din of
dozens of sodomites who were thronging the toilets, cutting holes in the
cubicle walls with electric power tool, laughing, shouting, buggering each
other, and generally acting in the sordid manner that one might expect.

It was, by all accounts, a complete travesty! - "We are assembled here...."
began King Percy, only to immediate drowned out by the shriek of a 24 volt
cordless Makita drill cutting yet another large circular hole between
cubiclesfour & five!

"To remember", continued the King, defiantly, " The fearless stand for
morality that was......" "Oh YEAH!!!, that's BIG!! - lemme have it!!!!"
came frenzied shouting from cubicle one (known as 'The Warhol Room, because
of the abdance of homosexual pornography sketched on its walls) , while at
the urinals, six sodomites began to jeer and inquire whether the dignified
old monarch was on the lookout for a new queen!....

After that, the pilgrimage was abandoned - and the toilets left entirely to
the Grimmclogge gay community.

However, if the Iron Curtain can fall, there remains hope that, in
Grimmclogge, a rejuvenated monarchy can once more take its rightful place at
the centre of civic life - and a newly crowned King Albert might advance
once more upon the Foundry Road public toilets to wreak once more the
valiant deeds of his ancestors!

Let's hope so, anyway.
Look in a tobacco can MLB