Seafood Chowder for the Mouser

Okay, mates, we're approaching an island. You've each got small
buckets. Nothing too heavy, right? (kittens nod their heads)
Buckets and shovels. (Nods) Here's what I want you to do. See
those little holes in the sand? That means there are crabs down
there. They are hiding! Dig down and pick
up those litle crabs and put themin the bucket. That will be dinner
tonight, a nice crab mince. What the humans call crab-cakes.

Persia


As soon as Persia turned her head, Pixie whispered to Sorbet "can she
do this?"

"Sssh, and do what she says," Sorbet mewed softly. "She waves a mean
tail. She whacked me with it yesterday when I dipped my tongue into
the fish stew she was making. Weebles is even worse. He not only
makes you do what he says but what she says as well. They're wink
winks you know."

"What's a wink wink?" Pixie asked. "Is it something good?"

"They're dating, you know gooshy stuff. Not food though. Watch it,
here comes Weebles. Mr. Weebles," Sorbet asked, "why do we have to
use these scoopy things? Our paws are faster and easier."

"Persia wants you to use shovels so that you learn proper manners and
don't get your paws dirty and track sand all over the decks."

"Ah man!" "Do we have to?" "I doan wanna." The kits were yowling
unhappily. First sergeant Huey heard the fuss and walked up on deck
to check the disruption out.

"What's going on here?" He asked. Ten kits and four bitties all
tried to tell him their version of the story at the same time.

"ENOUGH!!!" Weebles yowled. He slapped the most vocal, Errol,
across the nose with his tail. "You will do as Persia says, and you
will bring back enough crabs for mince for everyone. KITS!" His
disgusted voice carried across the deck.

"Weebles, who is in charge of our little delinquents while they dig?"
Huey asked.

"I hadn't thought about it," Weebles replied. "It's been a while
since I have raised kits."

"I have just the cats for the job," First Sergeant Huey meowed with
satisfaction. "AWOL, go get Corporal Qui Gun Kit, Mayhem, Jubilee,
and Sonya. And make it quick this time." AWOL scampered off his
little stubby tail bobbing as his plump bottom swayed in time with
his legs. "While he's doing that, let me give you kits a few tips
about crabs. Corporal Kit can tell you a lot about them and tails,
but the big thing to remember is that their paws have hard claws that
are big and really hurt. You have to dig really fast and it is best
to work in teams. You littlest ones, you four Scotties and Pixie,
should let the bigger kits do the catching part. You can take the
buckets to the other cats and kits and keep track of the catch."

The kittens were soon joined by Qui Gun Kit, Mayhem, Jubilee, and
Sonya. Miss LilyWhiskers saw the little group gathering near the gang
plank and joined them. She was given permission to join the hunting
party and asked Qui Gun Kit to tell them how to catch crabs with his
tail. Qui Gun declined.

Later, Captain Pine Cone walked over to the gang plank to check on the
progress of the new dock the humans and cats were building. Before
the end of the week The Mouser would be able to tie up to a newly
built dock. The old one was falling apart and even the cats had to
be careful walking on it. The new one was designed to accommodate a
taller deck than the old one was and even had a canopy so that cats
and humans wouldn't get wet in most rain storms. He started to say
something to PawRob who was supervising from the deck when he noticed
sand flying through the air from a large hole in the beach.

"What is that?" He asked PawRob.

"The crab hunting party," PawRob answered. "It looks like
LilyWhiskers, Muffin, and Sherbet have one." One could hear the cats
and kittens laughing from on the beach. All of the cats were covered
with wet sand. Kittay and Randy had bandages on their tails from
trying to catch crabs with them and six little pails with crabs in
them were lined up at the dock.

"Ah, Miss Persia is going to delight us with her minced crab again
this year," Pine Cone observed. "It looks like they're trying to
catch enough so that you humans can have some too."

"Not for Pam or me," PawRob emphatically said. "As Pam says 'we
don't DO crabs.' I think we'll have something else instead, like
pizza."

"You don't know what you're missing PawRob," Pine Cone trilled.
"Finest kind."

"I do know, I just don't like crab, the other humans probably will
eat Pam's and my share and go looking for more." A cry from the
beach stopped all activity on board and from the dock. "Oh God,
what's happening now."

The two raced down the gang plank and toward where a kit was wailing
in agony and trying to wipe sand out of her eyes with her paw. Helen
and Kitty Schottland dashed after them, a first aid kit in Helen's
hand. As they reached the cluster of cats, kits, and humans on the
beach, the group opened up to let the two in to take care of their
patients. Justine was curled in a ball with her paws over her eyes
trying to get sand out of them. Data stood on the carapace of a good
sized crab. The crab had kicked sand into Justine's eyes as she dug
him out of his hiding place. The two were tenderly picked up and
carried into the infirmary where Pam and Mischief had set up
treatment trays for the medical team to work with.

An hour later, Data and Justine were sleeping peacefully in their
beds. Helen wiped sweat from her forehead. "Well, it could be much
worse," she said.

"Did you hear what little Data meowed as I was finishing bandaging
his leg? He said that he wants the first plate of mince from that
crab," Kitty Schottland mewed with amusement.

"We'll have to make sure he gets his wish. He was so brave to try to
rescue Justine. Her language was definitely not learned in a drawing
room," Helen laughed briefly. The two walked to the galley where an
anxious Persia hovered over the stove, the odor of cooking minced
crab punctuating her fear and guilt over the little ones. They
re-assured all of the cats assembled there that the two would be fine
and that the accident was something that could have happened to
anyone, human or feline.

Persia was moaning that she'd never send the kits off on such a
dangerous task again when a small mew was heard from the infirmary
hatch.

"Please, Miss Persia," Data mewed plaintively. "Please don't make us
stop doing fun things like crab hunting. We has so much fun with
it." He limped closer to the stove. "That smells so good, can I
learns how to make that too? I wants to be a galley cat."

"Really? It's lots of hard work and you spend a lot of time smelling
like cooking food," Persia warned the little kit.

"I wants to cook. I wants to make people happy like you do. I'll be
big soon and I can help, please?"

"Data, when you are big enough and Lady Pandora and Miss Tanada think
you're ready, you can come and be my apprentice any time," Persia
purred at the little bittie.

"YAY!" Data cheered then hiccupped. Kitty Schottland escorted him
back to his bed with a promise that he would have the very first
minced crab serving cooled enough to eat.

Submitted on behalf of The Mouser
Pam S. recording

Pretty simple and yes, the kits can help! Do we have evaporated milk?
Clams we can catch, it's the crab and shrimp that are scurrying away!
Stop!! Oh dear.

Persia




From: "tanadashoes"
Subject: Persia Calls the Cats and Kits Around
Date: Thursday, June 05, 2008 9:31 PM


"jmcquown" wrote in message

"jmcquown" wrote in message
...

Pretty simple and yes, the kits can help! Do we have evaporated milk?
Clams we can catch, it's the crab and shrimp that are scurrying away!
Stop!! Oh dear.

Persia


1st Sergeant Huey was walking across the main deck when his attention was
drawn to a group of soggy kittens. "What happened now?" He asked Miss
LilyWhiskers who was escorting them to a pile of towels.

"Shrimping," Miss LilyWhiskers replied. "Clams as well. They all wanted
to see what live shrimp looked like and the next thing you know. . ."

"I see," Huey looked down at a little ball of soaking wet fur. "Did they
all fall in?"

"Yup, and they took Qui Gun, Jubilee, and Mayhem with them. Tanada and
Sonya had to haul them out. They've got the rest of them over by the
railing right now. The fat wench is helping dry them off."

Huey looked over to where a group of cats and kittens patiently waited their
turns to be toweled dry. "Oh well, the chowder is worth it and the kits
need to learn now while it is relatively safe. I hate trying to net them
while at sea," he mewed to Lilywhiskers.

Miss LilyWhiskers picked up Meezer by the scruff of his nick. His Siamese
marked fur looked tattered and limp, not at all like the brave little bittie
who's stood up to Captain Pine Cone just a couple of days before. He stuck
his tongue out at 1st Sergeant Huey, then sneezed. "Ow, I bit by ton." He
yowled.

"Serves you right," Miss LilyWhiskers trilled at him. "I saw what you were
doing. Bitties. I bet I was never this outrageous." Huey laughed.

Respectfully submitted by The Mouser
Pam S. recording