Sheriff Of Catmerica

ChildFree23 wrote:
I run 4 sheriff!

Louise

I challenge you to a debate!

Wait a second, what's a debate?

Cousin Rosco P. Catrane, Age 1
Junior Tabby In Residence
Future Sheriff of Catmerica (Hopefully)

Accept. Start debate now.

Louise

A question for the debaters.

The cat wants attention now and the human is sitting at the
computer.
The cat gets up and walks back and forth between the monitor
and the
human and starts washing the human's hand. The human makes the
cat get
on the floor. What should be done about that?

I want to answer that! - Lilith Kitten-Mahoney

No, Lilith, you can't! You're not running for sheriff!

However, my cousin-cat Lilith Kitten-Mahoney does have the
perfect solution for humans who use notebook computers. Simply
lean on, or sit on, the on/off switch until the computer dies.
The human will get up in disgust, and the cat will have the human
all to themselves for a smurgle!

Cousin Rosco P. Catrane, Age 1
Junior Tabby In Residence

That is a good solution if the human uses a laptop. But what does the
Sheriff do about it if the cat complains about it.

Clarence

ChildFree23 wrote:
Accept. Start debate now.

Louise

I haff a kwestion fur da debaterz:

Whut ifn yur hooman decides to pick you up and smurgle you
against
yur will, cawlin yu dum stuff like "ookie wookie poo" an
kissing you
on yur hed when all dat you wants to do iz akt like a dignified
cat
and rest?

Iz dat illegal in Catamerika?
--
Purrs,

Mme. Anaïs

That's a furry good question, Mme. Anais. I am a rather squirmy
cat and do not like to be held, so kitties, follow my example.
Yelp and howl for your life. Then start squirming and doing
backflips in the human's arms, and try to jump out. If all else
fails -- and only if all else fails -- out come the claws and
teeth, know what I mean? ;-)

Cousin Rosco P. Catrane, Age 1
Junior Tabby In Residence

Hi Cousin Rosco. We need to know what the sheriff will do about it if
the cat complains. Can you tell us what you'd do if you were sherriff?

Clarence

ChildFree23 wrote:
I run 4 sheriff!

Louise

I challenge you to a debate!

Wait a second, what's a debate?

Cousin Rosco P. Catrane, Age 1
Junior Tabby In Residence
Future Sheriff of Catmerica (Hopefully)

Accept. Start debate now.

Louise

I have a question. What does the sheriff do if a cat complains
that
the human refuses to feed him enough?

Chester

The sheriff immediately teleports to the starving cat's residence
to interrogate the human. If the results are unsatisfactory, the
offending human is sent to Shady Breezes for a "rehabilitation."
The starving cat gets to come with their human, if they'd like,
and help in the "rehabilitation."

Cousin Rosco P. Catrane, Age 1
Junior Tabby In Residence

Hey Cousin Rosco, we thought the name of the rehabilitation place was
Pleasant Breezes, not Shady Breezes. Is there a new one called Shady
Breezes?

Chester and Clarence, who remember Pleasant Breezes from rpc

Adam wrote:
I have a question. What does the sheriff do if a cat complains that
the human refuses to feed him enough?

Chester

If normal cat, I beet up hoomin. If fat cat, I beet up cat.

Lovable Louise

Why do you think that beating up humans and cats is the answer to every
problem?

Chester

Adam wrote:
I have a question for the debaters.

A cat is sleeping peacefully on the bed and all of a sudden the bedroom
is invaded by humans and they start chasing the cat around. Then they
take the cat to the metalmonster and take him to TED for no reason.
The cat complains to the Catmerica Police Department. What does the
sheriff do about it?

Nathan

I beet up hoomins.

Lovable Louise

We've noticed that the human ignores it when cats beat her up. What
would you do about that?

Nathan

I have a question. What does the sheriff do if a cat complains that
the human refuses to feed him enough?

Chester

If normal cat, I beet up hoomin. If fat cat, I beet up cat.

Lovable Louise


Why do you think that beating up humans and cats is the answer to every
problem?

Chester

It works 4 me, so don't knock it.

"Lovable Louise"

I have a question for the debaters.

A cat is sleeping peacefully on the bed and all of a sudden the bedroom
is invaded by humans and they start chasing the cat around. Then they
take the cat to the metalmonster and take him to TED for no reason.
The cat complains to the Catmerica Police Department. What does the
sheriff do about it?

Nathan

I beet up hoomins.

Lovable Louise


We've noticed that the human ignores it when cats beat her up. What
would you do about that?

Nathan

Use claws.

"Lovable Louise"

I have a question. What does the sheriff do if a cat complains that
the human refuses to feed him enough?

Chester

If normal cat, I beet up hoomin. If fat cat, I beet up cat.

Lovable Louise


Why do you think that beating up humans and cats is the answer to every
problem?

Chester

It works 4 me, so don't knock it.

"Lovable Louise"

Do you beat up your human?

Chester

I run 4 sheriff!

Louise

I challenge you to a debate!

Wait a second, what's a debate?

Cousin Rosco P. Catrane, Age 1
Junior Tabby In Residence
Future Sheriff of Catmerica (Hopefully)

Accept. Start debate now.

Louise

I have a question. What does the sheriff do if a cat
complains
that the human refuses to feed him enough?

Chester

The sheriff immediately teleports to the starving cat's
residence
to interrogate the human. If the results are unsatisfactory,
the
offending human is sent to Shady Breezes for a
"rehabilitation."
The starving cat gets to come with their human, if they'd
like,
and help in the "rehabilitation."

Cousin Rosco P. Catrane, Age 1
Junior Tabby In Residence

Hey Cousin Rosco, we thought the name of the rehabilitation
place was
Pleasant Breezes, not Shady Breezes. Is there a new one called
Shady
Breezes?

Chester and Clarence, who remember Pleasant Breezes from rpc

Capt. Midnight (RB) left a lot of messages around for me to
absorb, but he never told me what the rehabilitation center was
called. Shady Breezes just popped out.

Cousin Rosco P. Catrane, Age 1
Junior Tabby In Residence

Adam wrote:
I have a question for the debaters.

A cat is sleeping peacefully on the bed and all of a sudden the bedroom
is invaded by humans and they start chasing the cat around. Then they
take the cat to the metalmonster and take him to TED for no reason.
The cat complains to the Catmerica Police Department. What does the
sheriff do about it?

Nathan

I beet up hoomins.

Lovable Louise


We've noticed that the human ignores it when cats beat her up. What
would you do about that?

Nathan

Use claws.

"Lovable Louise"

But we don't want to hurt the human too much. If we did that they
might not be able to feed us.

Nathan