The Chronicles of Frank I (LONG)

What a gorgeous, heartwarming story. Can't wait to read the next
installment.

Yowie

"Marina" wrote in message
...
This comes very late for the writing challenge, but like many elderly
people, Frank feels the need to set down his life and write his
autobiography, and since his life has been a long and eventful one, I
told him he'd better break it up in chapters. I hope he will write more
soon. He had a bit of a bad start in life, though nothing as tragic as
many other stories we've read here. And it all ends happily (at least
for me -- their loss, my gain).
_____________________________

My hoomin says I was born on 27th November in 1987, whatever that means.
(Nikki says it means I'm an old geezer, but Waffles knows this aint
true). All I know is it was nice and warm and cuddly with my mummy, and
later, there were big dogs to bully around and my two sisters and one
brother to play with. Then my sisters and my brother were taken away,
and I was left with my mummy. Then some people came and took me away
from my mum.

When we got to their place, of course I had to test that gravity
functioned the same way there as it did at my mum's, just to make sure
it was a safe place to live. But these people could not understand the
importance of my tests. When I did them, they would roll up a newspaper
and smack me with it. The nerve! Finally, they took me back to my mum's.
That was OK, because I already knew that was a safe place to be.

But then some other people came and took me away. These people had one
of those shrunken humans. She was really fond of me -- a little *too*
fond if you ask me, since I was becoming a teenager and teenage cats
don't like cuddling that much. But this shrunken hoomin always started
sneezing and her yucky stuff started coming out of her nose when she was
around me. Her eyes got all puffy and red, and I was a little scared of
her. In the end, the big people took me back to my mum's place again.

OK, I thought, let's hope they let me stay here. Bullying those dogs was
great fun, even if I didn't have my siblings there to play with any
more. But one day my then hoomin took me for a ride in the shiny growly
monster, stopped at a house and carried me up a whole lot of stairs
together with another hoomin, and rang a doorbell.

The door opened, and there stood the hoomin I would come to know as my
true Meowmie. She ooh'ed and aah'ed over me, and the two other hoomins
stayed a while to watch me get settled (I would later learn that the
other hoomin was my Meowmie's sister). After they left, I pretty much
ignored the hoomin for the rest of the day, since I was busy inspecting
this third new place in a short time. Well, there was a clean litterbox
(that I used) and nice food set out for me, so I decided this would be OK.

When the hoomin went to bed, I started testing the gravity at her place,
just to make sure it was a safe place for me to stay, you know. I heard
her mumbling, sometimes wailing my name (that I had learned at my mum's
-- imagine this hoomin already knew my name!) from the bed, but
dauntless, I continued my research. I also discovered a strange big
box-like thing, with movable parts that, when you walked on them, they
made interesting sounds. This proved an absorbing study for many hours
that night, and many nights after that. The hoomin used to mumble from
the bed, "Frank, pleeeeeease don't walk on the piano," but it really
needed thorough study.

When I had stayed at this hoomin's place for several days, I started to
feel quite comfortable, and decided to inspect the bed while the hoomin
was sleeping. I hadn't visited the bed before, because I felt that it
was the hoomin's own private place, inundated with her smell, and I
didn't want to infringe upon her, in case she would send me away.
However, I was feeling a bit homesick for my mum, and thought it might
be nice to cuddle up to the hoomin, just for a while, while she was
sleeping.

So, gathering all my courage, I jumped up on the bed. I sniffed around a
bit, saw the hoomin's head on something they call a pillow -- which I
now know is the most excellent cat bed there can be -- and was just
going to lay down at the other end of the bed, when suddenly something
moved under the covers. A bed mouse! No, several bed mice! This must be
why the hoomin had got me in in the first place, and why she had tried
to coax me into bed with her every evening since I arrived! She wanted
me to help her get rid of those bed mice! Well, I'd better earn my keep,
so I wouldn't have to change homes yet again. So I pounced, I grabbed
and bit, I bunny-kicked, I shook them by the neck, all amidst the
hoomin's sqeauls of pleasure that I'd finally started in on the real
work. After that, I spent every evening chasing those pesky bed mice,
that always sent out a new team of ten every evening to harass the
hoomin. I must have killed hundreds of them.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki


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What a gorgeous, heartwarming story. Can't wait to read the next
installment.

Yowie

"Marina" wrote in message
...
This comes very late for the writing challenge, but like many elderly
people, Frank feels the need to set down his life and write his
autobiography, and since his life has been a long and eventful one, I
told him he'd better break it up in chapters. I hope he will write more
soon. He had a bit of a bad start in life, though nothing as tragic as
many other stories we've read here. And it all ends happily (at least
for me -- their loss, my gain).
_____________________________

My hoomin says I was born on 27th November in 1987, whatever that means.
(Nikki says it means I'm an old geezer, but Waffles knows this aint
true). All I know is it was nice and warm and cuddly with my mummy, and
later, there were big dogs to bully around and my two sisters and one
brother to play with. Then my sisters and my brother were taken away,
and I was left with my mummy. Then some people came and took me away
from my mum.

When we got to their place, of course I had to test that gravity
functioned the same way there as it did at my mum's, just to make sure
it was a safe place to live. But these people could not understand the
importance of my tests. When I did them, they would roll up a newspaper
and smack me with it. The nerve! Finally, they took me back to my mum's.
That was OK, because I already knew that was a safe place to be.

But then some other people came and took me away. These people had one
of those shrunken humans. She was really fond of me -- a little *too*
fond if you ask me, since I was becoming a teenager and teenage cats
don't like cuddling that much. But this shrunken hoomin always started
sneezing and her yucky stuff started coming out of her nose when she was
around me. Her eyes got all puffy and red, and I was a little scared of
her. In the end, the big people took me back to my mum's place again.

OK, I thought, let's hope they let me stay here. Bullying those dogs was
great fun, even if I didn't have my siblings there to play with any
more. But one day my then hoomin took me for a ride in the shiny growly
monster, stopped at a house and carried me up a whole lot of stairs
together with another hoomin, and rang a doorbell.

The door opened, and there stood the hoomin I would come to know as my
true Meowmie. She ooh'ed and aah'ed over me, and the two other hoomins
stayed a while to watch me get settled (I would later learn that the
other hoomin was my Meowmie's sister). After they left, I pretty much
ignored the hoomin for the rest of the day, since I was busy inspecting
this third new place in a short time. Well, there was a clean litterbox
(that I used) and nice food set out for me, so I decided this would be OK.

When the hoomin went to bed, I started testing the gravity at her place,
just to make sure it was a safe place for me to stay, you know. I heard
her mumbling, sometimes wailing my name (that I had learned at my mum's
-- imagine this hoomin already knew my name!) from the bed, but
dauntless, I continued my research. I also discovered a strange big
box-like thing, with movable parts that, when you walked on them, they
made interesting sounds. This proved an absorbing study for many hours
that night, and many nights after that. The hoomin used to mumble from
the bed, "Frank, pleeeeeease don't walk on the piano," but it really
needed thorough study.

When I had stayed at this hoomin's place for several days, I started to
feel quite comfortable, and decided to inspect the bed while the hoomin
was sleeping. I hadn't visited the bed before, because I felt that it
was the hoomin's own private place, inundated with her smell, and I
didn't want to infringe upon her, in case she would send me away.
However, I was feeling a bit homesick for my mum, and thought it might
be nice to cuddle up to the hoomin, just for a while, while she was
sleeping.

So, gathering all my courage, I jumped up on the bed. I sniffed around a
bit, saw the hoomin's head on something they call a pillow -- which I
now know is the most excellent cat bed there can be -- and was just
going to lay down at the other end of the bed, when suddenly something
moved under the covers. A bed mouse! No, several bed mice! This must be
why the hoomin had got me in in the first place, and why she had tried
to coax me into bed with her every evening since I arrived! She wanted
me to help her get rid of those bed mice! Well, I'd better earn my keep,
so I wouldn't have to change homes yet again. So I pounced, I grabbed
and bit, I bunny-kicked, I shook them by the neck, all amidst the
hoomin's sqeauls of pleasure that I'd finally started in on the real
work. After that, I spent every evening chasing those pesky bed mice,
that always sent out a new team of ten every evening to harass the
hoomin. I must have killed hundreds of them.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki


---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.744 / Virus Database: 496 - Release Date: 25/08/04

"Marina" wrote in message
...
.... After that, I spent every evening chasing those pesky bed mice,
that always sent out a new team of ten every evening to harass the hoomin.
I must have killed hundreds of them.
Marina, Frank and Nikki
Marina,
That was great, well worth the wait.
I'll be looking forward to the next chapter.
Annie