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#21
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Goodbye to my Friend.
"Mac Cool" wrote in message ... Goodbye to my Friend Today my friend went to sleep. He has been having troubles these last few weeks with his heart and today a clot broke loose and paralyzed his back legs. Deeply saddened that our fight was over I took him to the pet hospital where he laid gently in my wife's arms with his head resting on my lap until he fell asleep. So gentle was his passing that I was the last to realize he was gone, at last he was out of pain. I still agonize over the decision. In my heart I know I did everything possible to keep the cat he was, alive. The last few days he was slipping away, not just his body but his essence, that part of him that made him my friend. Putting him to sleep was the humane decision, intellectually I know this and in my heart I felt that he truly would have agreed if he could have spoken but I could see in his eyes as I lay petting him this morning, that he was asking for my help. Help me, take the pain away. So I did the last thing I could do for you my friend, I took away your pain. Tommy came into our lives when he was about seven months old. My daughter and I went to a cat adoption fair at Petsmart. Among all the animals one stood out, a young male kitten hiding under the newspapers in his cage as he peeked at the strangers surrounding him. Most people ignored him, who wants a scaredy cat and when a few did stop to look he would cringe under his flimsy protection from the world. But something different happened when my daughter approached the cage, for the first time he crawled out from under his newspaper and brushed against the cage; his new family had arrived and he didn't have to hide anymore. We learned that Tommy was rescued from a trailer park where he had been abandoned, we learned that he had a very difficult kittenhood, that he had been locked away and nearly starved, that without a mother he had taught himself how to survive. Tommy would carry the scars from that time the rest of his life and he would become very upset at any closed doors in the house, except for the exterior doors, he had no desire to go out there. Tommy also was careful to never miss a meal and it was a few years before he became comfortable with an empty food bowl. His fear of starving showed as he grew to be an enormous thirty-four pound tom cat. Strangely, he was never graceful even as a kitten. I'll never forget the time he was sitting on the edge of my desk surveying the household and for no reason slipped and fell in the trash can. His ego was bruised more than his body. When we found Tommy at the adoption fair he had no whiskers, he had been attacked by another cat who had chewed his whiskers off, perhaps this made him clumsy. My daughters never really took to Tommy and neither did my wife. To them, he was the grumpy old cat who would took swipes at their legs as they walked past, never breaking skin but reminding them who had the claws. Tommy never liked kids and he didn't like girls in particular, the younger they were the less he liked them and they were rarely properly deferential toward his status as king of the house; because to Tommy you see, it was his house, his rules. Eventually he grew to challenge me, one day as he lay in my bathroom sink I tried to shoo him out and he took a swipe at me with his claws. As he recovered from his quick flight across the room he must have decided that second place was good enough as from that moment on he became my loyal friend. After his attempted coup d'état failed Tommy followed me from room to room always flopping down near my feet. Sometimes he would nearly trip me when he would silently flop down at my heels as I stood at the kitchen counter. When I left the house Tommy would lay in the window and watch for my return. He would always be sitting near the door waiting for me as I entered. At nighttime he would jump on the bed and flop himself down on my chest nearly cutting off my air while he lay with his nose inches from mine, purring and blowing his stinky breath in my face. Careful though, if I dared breath in his face I would get the look that says, 'this is not how things work' and he would get up and lay at my feet. Tommy was the softest animal I've ever petted and people loved to touch him. I used to joke that when he died I would make a rug from his pelt to throw in the floor and it would be like he never left, just cheaper. As he lay asleep in my arms today I remembered my jest and would have maybe smiled but his beautiful fur was ruined where the doctors had shaved his side, his neck and his paw last week in order to save his life. The dumb things you think of and it made me that much sadder that he had suffered yet more indignities for so little gain. People comfort themselves with thoughts that their loved ones go to heaven and they are up there, happy and looking down watching over us. I so much wish I could believe something like that it would ease the emptiness in my heart, it would relieve the anguish each time I look down expecting to see my friend and he is not there. Tommy lived the life he wanted to live. Despite a rough start to life and beating odds that nearly killed him, he lived happily, eating well, being my happy loyal friend to the end. I didn't judge him and he didn't judge me, we were just happy being. I hope my friend that you understand what I did and that a dignified death was the best I could do. Goodbye. I miss you. http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/2...ykittengw1.jpg http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/4...en07001la9.jpg Tommy 2002 - 5/31/2008 Thank you to the people that offered advice and support. I hope you'll find consolation in knowing you went the distance for him. You honored the trust he placed in you in life and in death. A true friend could do no more. I wish I could find adoptives like you for all my cats. My condolences. Phil |
#22
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Goodbye to my Friend.
"Mac Cool" wrote in message ... People comfort themselves with thoughts that their loved ones go to heaven and they are up there, happy and looking down watching over us. I so much wish I could believe something like that it would ease the emptiness in my heart, it would relieve the anguish each time I look down expecting to see my friend and he is not there. Oh rest assured that there is a place, my friend. My beloved cat Zipper, whom I had been with for 13 of his 16 years died in July of 2001 after a long bout with cancer. I put him through an ordeal which now I wish I had not. It bought him a few months is all. Prior to that he had a huge thymoma in his chest partially attached to his heart. I found a surgeon who could remove it and despite all odds he lived and was thriving until 6 months later when he developed intestinal lymphoma. His ordeal was my ordeal and we did it all, chemo, PEG tube, the works. He was diagnosed as in remission and died 2 weeks later of cardiomyopathy. His road to heaven was a rough one, thanks to me. To say I loved my cat would have been trite. His death is something I never have really completely recovered from. I just can't tell you the bond we shared. So let me pass on to you this story. The morning after Zipper died, I was lying in my bed crying like a baby. My hair and face were sticky from tears and snot and I wanted to die. I was never sadder in my life and I felt like I had been on a bender for a month as my whole body was in pain. I was thinking maybe I should just end it all and the weapon I keep in my dresser began to look good to me. I've related this story before but I am just now telling you that my thoughts were of suicide because of the way my beloved friend finally passed. My heart was ripped apart knowing he had died in pain, and suffered before the emergency vet could send him on his way. I waited too long in my selfish desire to keep him with me. I felt a sudden and very noticeable jolt at the foot of my bed. I whipped around and shouted his name. I felt footsteps across my bed coming towards me and I gasped. I was fully awake, it was no dream. It was 7:45 am I know because I looked at the clock. I could feel him, his presence, his weight and his breath. I had felt it every single night for more than 13 years after all and I knew what I was feeling. I sat there for an instant, then I felt the presence move away and jump off the bed. I then heard distinctly, two sets of cat feet thumping down my hall. Clear as a bell I heard those feet because at the time my hall was tiled and you know how cat claws sound on tile. Not one set, but two but only 1 had jumped on my bed and I know it as him. So that happened. It was very real, it was astonishing. And in an instant, I put away my thoughts of a moment ago. The grief passed, I felt calm and I had a sense I could deal with it after all. And while the coming months were lonely and sad and I found myself crying in odd places like grocery stores and such, I did survive. My friend had come to say cheerio and that all was well. The worst of my grief had passed miraculously. And 6 weeks after Zipper died, on August 29th of 2001, a new cat came into my life. It was the most unbelievable set of circumstances that led us to find each other but we did. It is a story of its own, so unlikely was the way it played out. And his name was Buddy, given to him by the people who had befriended him and gave him food while he lived rough. He was an abused and abandoned cat prior to that with what the vet said was clearly PTSD. He smelled like old socks, he farted like a truck driver and he snored like my ex. I loved him from the day I met him and he blossomed into a gorgeous and wonderful companion. I know who sent him to me. We grew together, two broken hearts who healed one another. He was a true old soul and every day with him was a gift. Buddy died in October of 2007. His death was peaceful, he too had thrown a series of clots. He was left at the vet's office in the small hope he could pull through. That night I was asleep and dreaming and I was awoken by a loud meow, the raspy, gravely voice of Buddy. It was 4 am and when the phone rang at 8:30 I knew it was the vet calling with the news of his quiet passing. She didn't know when he died but she speculated from the rigor that it was around 4 am. He was on strong pain killers she said and she assured me he did not suffer. So I hope this helps you in your quest for peace. There is another place, and your friend is there, of this I have no doubt. Be at peace knowing they have all the time in the world and they want you to be well and happy. And trust me, before all this happened I would have been the last person on earth to so much as even suggest it. Paul |
#23
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Goodbye to my Friend.
It's always so sad to lose our precious pets. Their life spans are much
shorter than ours so we can take care of them for their whole lives. Barb |
#24
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Goodbye to my Friend.
"Mac Cool" wrote Tommy also was careful to never miss a meal and it was a few years before he became comfortable with an empty food bowl. His fear of starving showed as he grew to be an enormous thirty-four pound tom cat. Which is almost certainly why he died from heart disease at such an early age. I was not going to bring it up until you decided to be such an asshole about the FACT that a 14-year-old ILL cat should be kept inside where he is safe. |
#25
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Goodbye to my Friend.
cybercat:
Which is almost certainly why he died from heart disease at such an early age. Thank you captain obvious. I was not going to bring it up until you decided to be such an asshole about the FACT that a 14-year-old ILL cat should be kept inside where he is safe. BTW, just like the jerks in the dog group I mentioned yesterday, you didn't even ask any questions about her cat's environment. You just assumed the worst and began preaching. At least you were nicer to jjg than others were to me but in the end your petty attempt to hurt my feelings was a good demonstration of the type of person I warned jjg about. |
#26
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Goodbye to my Friend.
"Mac Cool" wrote in message ... cybercat: Which is almost certainly why he died from heart disease at such an early age. Thank you captain obvious. So why, then, did you not address this issue? Warning others with obese cats that heart disease and a short life is the common outcome? Why was it not addressed at all in ANY of your posts? We adopted our petite female (her healthy weight is 8 lbs according to her vet) when she was five years old and eighteen pounds. We reduced her weight to 9 lbs. At 13 she has a heart condition that is presently kept in check with beta blockers. BTW, just like the jerks in the dog group I mentioned yesterday, you didn't even ask any questions about her cat's environment. No matter what his environment, indoor is safer. It would be if he were NOT 14 and seriously ill, and he IS 14 and seriously ill. You just assumed the worst and began preaching. At least you were nicer to jjg than others were to me but in the end your petty attempt to hurt my feelings was a good demonstration of the type of person I warned jjg about. Yes, well you--who without apology contributed to putting your 6-year-old cat into an early grave, and "j'g," who is irresponsible enough to even suggest exposing an old, ill cat to the outdoors unsupervised, are the people I would warn any pet adoption people to look out for. Show me the post where you acknowledged that you should NEVER have allowed your cat to get to 35 pounds. I see lots where you want all the sympathy you can get, but I saw not one taking responsibility for your own negligence in allowing him to become morbidly obese. |
#27
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Goodbye to my Friend.
Response to "cybercat" :
snip Show me the post where you acknowledged that you should NEVER have allowed your cat to get to 35 pounds. I see lots where you want all the sympathy you can get, but I saw not one taking responsibility for your own negligence in allowing him to become morbidly obese. Hey, Mac Cool, I feel your pain and I know someone as blunt as cybercat doesn't help, but I think I missed the "34 pounds" part. Phat Kat, our newest arrival is over 22 pounds and it FREAKS ME OUT. To know that you "allowed" your precious kitty to reach ~34lbs. is a little bit out there. I am a bit too "sloshed" to cast any judgment. But I feel your pain, wish you didn't have to go through it -- but at the same time wonder if ThirtyFourPounder - HAD - to go through what (s)he did!? Maybe I should have kept this to myself... ? P.S. Please take no offense. I meant none. -- -Lost Remove the extra words to reply by e-mail. Don't e-mail me. I am kidding. No I am not. |
#28
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Goodbye to my Friend.
"-Lost" wrote in message ... Response to "cybercat" : snip Show me the post where you acknowledged that you should NEVER have allowed your cat to get to 35 pounds. I see lots where you want all the sympathy you can get, but I saw not one taking responsibility for your own negligence in allowing him to become morbidly obese. Hey, Mac Cool, I feel your pain and I know someone as blunt as cybercat doesn't help, but I think I missed the "34 pounds" part. Phat Kat, our newest arrival is over 22 pounds and it FREAKS ME OUT. To know that you "allowed" your precious kitty to reach ~34lbs. is a little bit out there. I am a bit too "sloshed" to cast any judgment. But I feel your pain, wish you didn't have to go through it -- but at the same time wonder if ThirtyFourPounder - HAD - to go through what (s)he did!? Maybe I should have kept this to myself... ? P.S. Please take no offense. I meant none. I don't mean to be cruel. My heart just gets caught up with the cats. I don't WANT whats-his-name to leave his ill old cat outside alone to fend with anything that might come, and I don't think Mac or anyone else should advocate it or sneer at those of us who think we should protect our cats from harm. Why are you drinking so much? Or is that another group? |
#29
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Goodbye to my Friend.
Response to "cybercat" :
Why are you drinking so much? Or is that another group? Is there an alt.drunks!? ; ) Anyway, there is no good reason. Major medical/life altering news -- excuses, excuses... -- -Lost Remove the extra words to reply by e-mail. Don't e-mail me. I am kidding. No I am not. |
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