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To Megan and Mary - O'Malley/Xena (long)



 
 
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  #1  
Old July 17th 03, 02:05 AM
Andr0meda
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default To Megan and Mary - O'Malley/Xena (long)

Dear Megan and Mary,

Many Thanks for taking so much of your time and your trouble to help me make
my two cats friends for life.
I really appreciate all your help.
After reading your posts under "O'Malley-Hercules & Xena......." and Mary's
email, I have done some thinking.
First of all, even before that, I had no intention to allow any cat fights
if could be at all avoided. What Dr Raoul has said, I take with a grain of
salt, and I have my own modifications to his plan.
I can see many similarities in my situation to Mary's, but there are also
big differences.
1) O'Malley can't stay in an enclosed room much longer. No matter how big.
This morning he was screaming & throwing himself at the door hoping to get
out. The bathroom where he is now is a really large one, with two large
windows, scratching post and all that he needs. He used to be let outside
and this he must be missing, too.
2) Xena is the one who will probably keep distance from O'Malley at first.
She does it with new humans as well. Two years ago she spent 3 days under my
bed when my sister was visiting - she started making appearance on the third
day. This is because I have been hiding her in a rental unit for over 3
years and pets were NOT ALLOWED. There was minimal contact with outside
world for her.
How do I know what to expect from her?

This morning I have put O'Malley into Xena's cat carrier and opened the
bathroom door.
It didn't take long and Xena approached the box. She sniffed at him, gave a
long quiet hiss; then again and again. Inside the box O'Malley was
undisturbed - he has been with other cats before.
Neither was aggressive. Xena sniffed for a little longer, then walked away.
She returned twice to sniff some more - crawling and cautious. No more
hissing.
Then she disappeared.
After I closed the bathroom door and released the 'prisoner' who was totally
undisturbed and jumped onto the window to look out.
I went to look for Xena and couldn't find her. Eventually I located her in
my bed, under covers (her recent hiding spot). She stayed there for another
30 minutes until I left for work, and I believe she is still there now.

Well, Xena is not outgoing enough to make initial contact, and I think she
may just hiss or warn him off should he try to approach her at first. It may
take her a few days to come out of hiding once she knows that he is no
danger to her.

I intend to keep O'Malley in his bathroom for two more days, until Saturday
after work when I plan to release him. I will open his door a fraction
tonight and secure it with a door stopper so that he stays inside - see what
happens. I will repeat the exercise with O'Malley in the cat carrier a
couple of times. May also put Xena in my bedroom (her safe haven) and let
him run around the house first.

Please let me know what you think about all this. I simply didn't detect any
real aggression on either side while they 'met' this morning, and Xena's
hissing was far less than what I expected. I think it is time to move
forward, mainly because O'Malley really can't stay in the bathroom or any
other room much longer, although Feliway does make him a bit calmer. Today I
also obtained a treatment for him from a holistic vet, who matched it to his
specific anxiety.

I am looking forward to your replies,
Many Thanks once again,
Regards,
Andr0


--



  #2  
Old July 17th 03, 02:05 AM
Andr0meda
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Dear Megan and Mary,

Many Thanks for taking so much of your time and your trouble to help me make
my two cats friends for life.
I really appreciate all your help.
After reading your posts under "O'Malley-Hercules & Xena......." and Mary's
email, I have done some thinking.
First of all, even before that, I had no intention to allow any cat fights
if could be at all avoided. What Dr Raoul has said, I take with a grain of
salt, and I have my own modifications to his plan.
I can see many similarities in my situation to Mary's, but there are also
big differences.
1) O'Malley can't stay in an enclosed room much longer. No matter how big.
This morning he was screaming & throwing himself at the door hoping to get
out. The bathroom where he is now is a really large one, with two large
windows, scratching post and all that he needs. He used to be let outside
and this he must be missing, too.
2) Xena is the one who will probably keep distance from O'Malley at first.
She does it with new humans as well. Two years ago she spent 3 days under my
bed when my sister was visiting - she started making appearance on the third
day. This is because I have been hiding her in a rental unit for over 3
years and pets were NOT ALLOWED. There was minimal contact with outside
world for her.
How do I know what to expect from her?

This morning I have put O'Malley into Xena's cat carrier and opened the
bathroom door.
It didn't take long and Xena approached the box. She sniffed at him, gave a
long quiet hiss; then again and again. Inside the box O'Malley was
undisturbed - he has been with other cats before.
Neither was aggressive. Xena sniffed for a little longer, then walked away.
She returned twice to sniff some more - crawling and cautious. No more
hissing.
Then she disappeared.
After I closed the bathroom door and released the 'prisoner' who was totally
undisturbed and jumped onto the window to look out.
I went to look for Xena and couldn't find her. Eventually I located her in
my bed, under covers (her recent hiding spot). She stayed there for another
30 minutes until I left for work, and I believe she is still there now.

Well, Xena is not outgoing enough to make initial contact, and I think she
may just hiss or warn him off should he try to approach her at first. It may
take her a few days to come out of hiding once she knows that he is no
danger to her.

I intend to keep O'Malley in his bathroom for two more days, until Saturday
after work when I plan to release him. I will open his door a fraction
tonight and secure it with a door stopper so that he stays inside - see what
happens. I will repeat the exercise with O'Malley in the cat carrier a
couple of times. May also put Xena in my bedroom (her safe haven) and let
him run around the house first.

Please let me know what you think about all this. I simply didn't detect any
real aggression on either side while they 'met' this morning, and Xena's
hissing was far less than what I expected. I think it is time to move
forward, mainly because O'Malley really can't stay in the bathroom or any
other room much longer, although Feliway does make him a bit calmer. Today I
also obtained a treatment for him from a holistic vet, who matched it to his
specific anxiety.

I am looking forward to your replies,
Many Thanks once again,
Regards,
Andr0


--



  #3  
Old July 17th 03, 03:15 AM
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Andr0 wrote:
1) O'Malley can't stay in an enclosed
room much longer. No matter how big.
This morning he was screaming & throwing
himself at the door hoping to get out.
The bathroom where he is now is a really
large one, with two large windows,
scratching post and all that he needs.
He used to be let outside and this he
must be missing, too.


There is a compromise here that will allow you to take more time and
keep Herc happy. No doubt Xena sleeps all day while you are at work so
there is no reason you can't put Xena in the bedroom with water and a
litterbox and let Herc out to roam the house while you are at work. This
will not only give him a break fom the batroom, but it will also give
him time to get his scent in all areas of the house which will help Xena
get used to that before she has to get used to his physical presence.

2) Xena is the one who will probably
keep distance from O'Malley at first.
She does it with new humans as well. Two
years ago she spent 3 days under my bed
when my sister was visiting - she
started making appearance on the third
day. This is because I have been hiding
her in a rental unit for over 3 years
and pets were NOT ALLOWED. There was
minimal contact with outside world for
her.
How do I know what to expect from her?

You don't and that is why it is wise to be patient and take your time.
There are plenty of cats that will hide from humans, but when faced with
another cat will go on the attack. If she does react badly you are going
to stress BOTH cats out and things will take longer.

This morning I have put O'Malley into
Xena's cat carrier and opened the
bathroom door.
It didn't take long and Xena approached
the box. She sniffed at him, gave a long
quiet hiss; then again and again. Inside
the box O'Malley was undisturbed - he
has been with other cats before. Neither
was aggressive. Xena sniffed for a
little longer, then walked away. She
returned twice to sniff some more -
crawling and cautious. No more hissing. Then she disappeared.
After I closed the bathroom door and
released the 'prisoner' who was totally
undisturbed and jumped onto the window
to look out. I went to look for Xena and
couldn't find her. Eventually I located
her in my bed, under covers (her recent
hiding spot). She stayed there for
another 30 minutes until I left for
work, and I believe she is still there
now.


It should be pretty clear that even the presence of the cat in the
carrier is stressful to Xena, which is another reason why you should go
slowly and give her time to adjust. Forcing this cat on her too quickly
is not fair to her.

Well, Xena is not outgoing enough to
make initial contact, and I think she
may just hiss or warn him off should he
try to approach her at first. It may
take her a few days to come out of
hiding once she knows that he is no
danger to her.


Why put her through this kind of stress when you can go slower and give
her time to adjust?

I intend to keep O'Malley in his
bathroom for two more days, until
Saturday after work when I plan to
release him.


I think it's a mistake to decide you're going to release him on a
specific day when you have not given Xena nearly enough time (based on
her reaction so far) to acclimate to his presence. My other concern is
that he may pick up on her fear and try to pick on her.

I will open his door a
fraction tonight and secure it with a
door stopper so that he stays inside -
see what happens. I will repeat the
exercise with O'Malley in the cat
carrier a couple of times. May also put
Xena in my bedroom (her safe haven) and
let him run around the house first.


These steps I agree with and would recommend you do for longer than 2
days.

Please let me know what you think about
all this. I simply didn't detect any
real aggression on either side while
they 'met' this morning, and Xena's
hissing was far less than what I
expected. I think it is time to move
forward, mainly because O'Malley really
can't stay in the bathroom or any other
room much longer, although Feliway does
make him a bit calmer. Today I also
obtained a treatment for him from a
holistic vet, who matched it to his
specific anxiety.


What needs to be taken in to consideration here is not just whether you
think they'll be fighting, but also the stress level that the *resident*
cat feels. Herc will survive and has an advantage as he has lived with
other cats. Being confined to one room all the time is really his only
issue and I've already given you advice on how to deal with that.

Xena is another story. She has never lived with another cat, is also in
a new place, and it is obvious from your description that Herc's
presence is stressing her out.

While introductions do have some level of stress, what you have to look
at right now is what is the best way to proceed that will put the
*least* amount of stress on Xena. If it were me, I'd work on letting
Herc out for periods of time for a week or so while Xena is in the
closed bedroom and put up a screen door on the bathroom so when he's in
there he can see out and she can see him, but have the *choice* of
whether she wants to get closer to him and investigate. I have no doubt
that she will start to get curious about him and do just that. I would
base my decision on when to try a full face to face introduction on how
she progresses at that point, and no sooner. I firmly believe it is a
mistake to do an introduction based on the human's schedule, and any
decisions should be based totally on how the cats are doing.

You are, of course, free to do whatever you want, but after seeing a
recent post from someone who had to give up his new cat because he threw
caution to the wind and put the cats together too fast, which resulted
in constant fighting, it made me even more adamant about doing
introductions slowly.

Megan



"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do
nothing."

-Edmund Burke

Learn The TRUTH About Declawing
http://www.stopdeclaw.com

Zuzu's Cats Photo Album:
http://www.PictureTrail.com/zuzu22

"Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one
elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and
splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then
providence moves too. A whole stream of events issues from the decision,
raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and
material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his
way."

- W.H. Murray


  #4  
Old July 17th 03, 03:15 AM
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Andr0 wrote:
1) O'Malley can't stay in an enclosed
room much longer. No matter how big.
This morning he was screaming & throwing
himself at the door hoping to get out.
The bathroom where he is now is a really
large one, with two large windows,
scratching post and all that he needs.
He used to be let outside and this he
must be missing, too.


There is a compromise here that will allow you to take more time and
keep Herc happy. No doubt Xena sleeps all day while you are at work so
there is no reason you can't put Xena in the bedroom with water and a
litterbox and let Herc out to roam the house while you are at work. This
will not only give him a break fom the batroom, but it will also give
him time to get his scent in all areas of the house which will help Xena
get used to that before she has to get used to his physical presence.

2) Xena is the one who will probably
keep distance from O'Malley at first.
She does it with new humans as well. Two
years ago she spent 3 days under my bed
when my sister was visiting - she
started making appearance on the third
day. This is because I have been hiding
her in a rental unit for over 3 years
and pets were NOT ALLOWED. There was
minimal contact with outside world for
her.
How do I know what to expect from her?

You don't and that is why it is wise to be patient and take your time.
There are plenty of cats that will hide from humans, but when faced with
another cat will go on the attack. If she does react badly you are going
to stress BOTH cats out and things will take longer.

This morning I have put O'Malley into
Xena's cat carrier and opened the
bathroom door.
It didn't take long and Xena approached
the box. She sniffed at him, gave a long
quiet hiss; then again and again. Inside
the box O'Malley was undisturbed - he
has been with other cats before. Neither
was aggressive. Xena sniffed for a
little longer, then walked away. She
returned twice to sniff some more -
crawling and cautious. No more hissing. Then she disappeared.
After I closed the bathroom door and
released the 'prisoner' who was totally
undisturbed and jumped onto the window
to look out. I went to look for Xena and
couldn't find her. Eventually I located
her in my bed, under covers (her recent
hiding spot). She stayed there for
another 30 minutes until I left for
work, and I believe she is still there
now.


It should be pretty clear that even the presence of the cat in the
carrier is stressful to Xena, which is another reason why you should go
slowly and give her time to adjust. Forcing this cat on her too quickly
is not fair to her.

Well, Xena is not outgoing enough to
make initial contact, and I think she
may just hiss or warn him off should he
try to approach her at first. It may
take her a few days to come out of
hiding once she knows that he is no
danger to her.


Why put her through this kind of stress when you can go slower and give
her time to adjust?

I intend to keep O'Malley in his
bathroom for two more days, until
Saturday after work when I plan to
release him.


I think it's a mistake to decide you're going to release him on a
specific day when you have not given Xena nearly enough time (based on
her reaction so far) to acclimate to his presence. My other concern is
that he may pick up on her fear and try to pick on her.

I will open his door a
fraction tonight and secure it with a
door stopper so that he stays inside -
see what happens. I will repeat the
exercise with O'Malley in the cat
carrier a couple of times. May also put
Xena in my bedroom (her safe haven) and
let him run around the house first.


These steps I agree with and would recommend you do for longer than 2
days.

Please let me know what you think about
all this. I simply didn't detect any
real aggression on either side while
they 'met' this morning, and Xena's
hissing was far less than what I
expected. I think it is time to move
forward, mainly because O'Malley really
can't stay in the bathroom or any other
room much longer, although Feliway does
make him a bit calmer. Today I also
obtained a treatment for him from a
holistic vet, who matched it to his
specific anxiety.


What needs to be taken in to consideration here is not just whether you
think they'll be fighting, but also the stress level that the *resident*
cat feels. Herc will survive and has an advantage as he has lived with
other cats. Being confined to one room all the time is really his only
issue and I've already given you advice on how to deal with that.

Xena is another story. She has never lived with another cat, is also in
a new place, and it is obvious from your description that Herc's
presence is stressing her out.

While introductions do have some level of stress, what you have to look
at right now is what is the best way to proceed that will put the
*least* amount of stress on Xena. If it were me, I'd work on letting
Herc out for periods of time for a week or so while Xena is in the
closed bedroom and put up a screen door on the bathroom so when he's in
there he can see out and she can see him, but have the *choice* of
whether she wants to get closer to him and investigate. I have no doubt
that she will start to get curious about him and do just that. I would
base my decision on when to try a full face to face introduction on how
she progresses at that point, and no sooner. I firmly believe it is a
mistake to do an introduction based on the human's schedule, and any
decisions should be based totally on how the cats are doing.

You are, of course, free to do whatever you want, but after seeing a
recent post from someone who had to give up his new cat because he threw
caution to the wind and put the cats together too fast, which resulted
in constant fighting, it made me even more adamant about doing
introductions slowly.

Megan



"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do
nothing."

-Edmund Burke

Learn The TRUTH About Declawing
http://www.stopdeclaw.com

Zuzu's Cats Photo Album:
http://www.PictureTrail.com/zuzu22

"Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one
elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and
splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then
providence moves too. A whole stream of events issues from the decision,
raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and
material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his
way."

- W.H. Murray


 




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