A cat forum. CatBanter

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » CatBanter forum » Cat Newsgroups » Cat community
Site Map Home Register Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

O.T.



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old November 5th 11, 07:02 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Sylvia M[_3_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,034
Default O.T.

Are there any Australian kitteez here?
I will send a fun--neeeee email about their answers to tourests to yur
slave.
Pit2nya


  #2  
Old November 5th 11, 09:37 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Mosey =^..^=[_10_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,132
Default O.T.



Are there any Australian kitteez here?
I will send a fun--neeeee email about their answers to tourests to yur
slave.
Pit2nya


ai dunt 'fink' der r inny Australian kitteez here, Pit2nya.
ai cood beh rong, but ai dunt fink sew, Nope.
Weh gotz sum nise kitties frum Scotland, but gnot frum Australia, ai dunt
fink inniwai.

Mosey

  #3  
Old November 5th 11, 09:43 PM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Storrmmee
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 4,912
Default O.T.

der usta be a famblee whut wuz furm der, da lady hoomin named a kitty little
miss violette afur mine momcat, but den der wuz prolemz of da hoomin nashure
anna dey no longer pozted, OEJ
"Mosey =^..^=" wrote in message
...


Are there any Australian kitteez here?
I will send a fun--neeeee email about their answers to tourests to yur
slave.
Pit2nya


ai dunt 'fink' der r inny Australian kitteez here, Pit2nya.
ai cood beh rong, but ai dunt fink sew, Nope.
Weh gotz sum nise kitties frum Scotland, but gnot frum Australia, ai dunt
fink inniwai.

Mosey



  #4  
Old November 6th 11, 12:24 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Sylvia M[_3_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,034
Default O.T.

HooKaye, Meowmee styll wantz tu shhhayer dese,
cuz hur kryed wen hur red dem....

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers
are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a
great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for
cretins!)

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on
TV,
how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching
them die.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

Aepends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad
tracks? ( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia?
Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns,
Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ?
( USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does
not
.... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees.
Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which
is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night
in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year
round? ( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense
rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and
make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget
its name.
It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of
Gum
trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you
go out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Qo you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first


  #5  
Old November 6th 11, 01:20 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Gramby
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,164
Default O.T.

Willow rolling on the floor, now dat iz funnie.

"Sylvia M" wrote in message ...

HooKaye, Meowmee styll wantz tu shhhayer dese,
cuz hur kryed wen hur red dem....

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers
are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a
great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for
cretins!)

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on
TV,
how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching
them die.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

Aepends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad
tracks? ( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia?
Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns,
Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ?
( USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does
not
.... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees.
Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which
is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night
in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year
round? ( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense
rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and
make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget
its name.
It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of
Gum
trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you
go out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Qo you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first

  #6  
Old November 6th 11, 01:29 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Storrmmee
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 4,912
Default O.T.

da soft iz awso kryin beclawz she didunt wantsa roll onna floor... behind
paw... her wulda hadda luk fur stuff ta du ifin her wuz down der, OEJ
"Sylvia M" wrote in message
...
HooKaye, Meowmee styll wantz tu shhhayer dese,
cuz hur kryed wen hur red dem....

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers
are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a
great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for
cretins!)

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV,
how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them
die.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

Aepends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks?
( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia?
Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns,
Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? (
USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees.
Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night
in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round?
( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense
rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and
make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its
name.
It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of
Gum
trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go
out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Qo you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first



  #7  
Old November 6th 11, 01:36 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Gramby
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,164
Default O.T.

Gramby neffer wastez a trip, if her getz down on da dloor, her pickz up
fings and seez what her kan do so az not to haff ta git down dere againz.
Piglett knowing this is so.

"Storrmmee" wrote in message ...

da soft iz awso kryin beclawz she didunt wantsa roll onna floor... behind
paw... her wulda hadda luk fur stuff ta du ifin her wuz down der, OEJ
"Sylvia M" wrote in message
...
HooKaye, Meowmee styll wantz tu shhhayer dese,
cuz hur kryed wen hur red dem....

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers
are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a
great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for
cretins!)

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV,
how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them
die.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

Aepends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks?
( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia?
Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns,
Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? (
USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees.
Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night
in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round?
( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense
rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and
make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its
name.
It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of
Gum
trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go
out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Qo you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first


  #8  
Old November 6th 11, 01:56 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Storrmmee
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 4,912
Default O.T.

i thinkz hersef lurned it furmda gramby... itz kinda funny sein hersef go
all ofur onna floor, OEJ
"Gramby" wrote in message
...
Gramby neffer wastez a trip, if her getz down on da dloor, her pickz up
fings and seez what her kan do so az not to haff ta git down dere againz.
Piglett knowing this is so.

"Storrmmee" wrote in message ...

da soft iz awso kryin beclawz she didunt wantsa roll onna floor... behind
paw... her wulda hadda luk fur stuff ta du ifin her wuz down der, OEJ
"Sylvia M" wrote in message
...
HooKaye, Meowmee styll wantz tu shhhayer dese,
cuz hur kryed wen hur red dem....

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers
are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a
great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for
cretins!)

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV,
how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching
them die.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

Aepends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks?
( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia?
Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns,
Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? (
USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does
not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees.
Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night
in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round?
( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense
rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and
make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its
name.
It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of
Gum
trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you
go out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Qo you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first




  #9  
Old November 6th 11, 02:16 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Rebecca[_2_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 611
Default O.T.

Heehee, deze iz funnee! When Meowmie wented to Pawstralia, sum uv da hoominz
she meeted sed dat dey uzed to tell vizziterz dat banananas grow strate, an
dey hav to go to bananana-bendin faktereez to git bended into curvz.

Rebecca

"Sylvia M" wrote in message
...
HooKaye, Meowmee styll wantz tu shhhayer dese,
cuz hur kryed wen hur red dem....

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers
are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a
great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for
cretins!)

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV,
how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them
die.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

Aepends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks?
( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia?
Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns,
Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? (
USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees.
Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night
in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round?
( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense
rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and
make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its
name.
It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of
Gum
trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go
out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Qo you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first



  #10  
Old November 6th 11, 02:22 AM posted to rec.pets.cats.community
Gramby
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,164
Default O.T.

Da Gamby alwayz waned tu lern to uze a boom R rang but waz fraid her wud
kill herselfz. O T glad she never really tried.

"Rebecca" wrote in message ...

Heehee, deze iz funnee! When Meowmie wented to Pawstralia, sum uv da hoominz
she meeted sed dat dey uzed to tell vizziterz dat banananas grow strate, an
dey hav to go to bananana-bendin faktereez to git bended into curvz.

Rebecca

"Sylvia M" wrote in message
...
HooKaye, Meowmee styll wantz tu shhhayer dese,
cuz hur kryed wen hur red dem....

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers
are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a
great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for
cretins!)

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV,
how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them
die.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )

Aepends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks?
( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia?
Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns,
Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK )

A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? (
USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees.
Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night
in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round?
( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense
rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and
make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its
name.
It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of
Gum
trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go
out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.
Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Qo you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first


 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 07:07 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2004-2018 CatBanter.
The comments are property of their posters.