cat hates baby

in article , Stormlady at don't@
email.me wrote on 1/1/05 11:57 PM:

I have a new baby, she is just over 2 months old. My cats are fine with
her, one just kinda ignores her and the other treats her like she has always
been around, ie. lies with her (with my supervision) just generally is great
with her. The problem is my in-laws cat, he hates her. Visiting is always
an exercise in diligence to make sure he does not go near her and hurt her.
He usually starts hissing at the baby when we show up, and at me. If anyone
tells him to go away he hisses at them too, then runs away hissing at
nothing. Then forget about going where he is to get anything, Once he ran
to the basement and when I went down to get a bottle of pop, he wouldn't let
me back up, he sat on the stairs and hissed at me, I had to yell for MIL to
rescue me. He has never been a friendly cat, and has bitten and scratched
me in the past when I tried to pet him so I learned my lesson, and I know
that he would hurt the baby as well if he were to get the chance. She will
definately have to be taught that Nannies and poppies cat doesn't play. Is
there anything that can be done to try and make this cat a little more
accepting of the baby? Or will we just have to be constantly on guard when
we visit?

I am all for putting the cat in the basement as soon as we show up and
therby avoid the problem but they always want to leave him up. It's a bit
too late when leaving him alone gives him an opportunity with the baby that
he takes. Yes, I really think he would maliciously attack her in his
jealousy.





Well, I don't understand why they don't just set up a room for him to be in
while you visit. It is what I would do and is much less stressful on all
parties including the scaredy cat (I'm certain he is just scared of
strangers and especially wierd looking mini humans and not jealous.)

Cats aren't malicious. Keep the cat sequestered and away from the
baby. he's just scared. Sheesh.

-L.

She just asked for advice. After all this NG is health AND behaviour.
Sheesh.

--
..oO rach Oo.


"-L." wrote in message
oups.com...
Cats aren't malicious. Keep the cat sequestered and away from the
baby. he's just scared. Sheesh.

-L.

Just tell your inlaws that you will not bring the baby to visit unless
the cat is locked up during your visit.


---MIKE---

in article , ---MIKE--- at
wrote on 1/2/05 8:01AM:

Just tell your inlaws that you will not bring the baby to visit unless
the cat is locked up during your visit.


---MIKE---

And it doesn't have to mean the cat is deprived. If my cats have to be put
in the bedroom for a while, they have beds, a litter box, food and a window.
Honestly, try to convince your family that the cat is probably MORE stressed
out being out and about during visits than if he has his own little home
free from strangers.

He sounds a nervous cat. Babies smell strange and make horrid loud
nosies and by hissing he is acting defensively. He isn't acting out of
jealousy or maliciousness.
He ran to the basement to escape you and from his point of view you
followed him so decided attack was the best form of defence.
From both your points of view it would be safer and kinder if the cat
was placed in a secured bedroom before you arrived.You can then relax
and enjoy your visits.
Alison

"Stormlady" don't@ email.me wrote in message
...
I have a new baby, she is just over 2 months old. My cats are fine
with
her, one just kinda ignores her and the other treats her like she
has always
been around, ie. lies with her (with my supervision) just generally
is great
with her. The problem is my in-laws cat, he hates her. Visiting is
always
an exercise in diligence to make sure he does not go near her and
hurt her.
He usually starts hissing at the baby when we show up, and at me.
If anyone
tells him to go away he hisses at them too, then runs away hissing
at
nothing. Then forget about going where he is to get anything, Once
he ran
to the basement and when I went down to get a bottle of pop, he
wouldn't let
me back up, he sat on the stairs and hissed at me, I had to yell for
MIL to
rescue me. He has never been a friendly cat, and has bitten and
scratched
me in the past when I tried to pet him so I learned my lesson, and I
know
that he would hurt the baby as well if he were to get the chance.
She will
definately have to be taught that Nannies and poppies cat doesn't
play. Is
there anything that can be done to try and make this cat a little
more
accepting of the baby? Or will we just have to be constantly on
guard when
we visit?

I am all for putting the cat in the basement as soon as we show up
and
therby avoid the problem but they always want to leave him up. It's
a bit
too late when leaving him alone gives him an opportunity with the
baby that
he takes. Yes, I really think he would maliciously attack her in
his
jealousy.

"Karen Chuplis" wrote in message
...
in article , ---MIKE--- at
wrote on 1/2/05 8:01AM:

Just tell your inlaws that you will not bring the baby to visit unless
the cat is locked up during your visit.


---MIKE---

And it doesn't have to mean the cat is deprived. If my cats have to be put
in the bedroom for a while, they have beds, a litter box, food and a
window.
Honestly, try to convince your family that the cat is probably MORE
stressed
out being out and about during visits than if he has his own little home
free from strangers.


I agree with Mike and Karen. Your in-laws should be told -- and you should
*stick to it* -- that there will be no further visits unless they agree to
put the cat in another room. The present situation is dangerous for your
baby, and placing the cat in a separate room while you visit would be best
for all (you, the baby, *and* the cat). This does not mean that the cat
should somehow be punished for something that he really doesn't understand.
For example, I will often place Holly and Duffy in the computer room *for
their own protection* when I have workers in the house. Make sure the room
you select will be comfortable for the cat -- water, toys, litter box. A
bedroom might feel less like "punishment" to the cat than the basement. It
would also be better to place the cat in a separate room before you arrive
to reduce the association of "separation" with your visits.

MaryL

"Stormlady" don't@ email.me wrote in message
...
I have a new baby, she is just over 2 months old. My cats are fine with
her, one just kinda ignores her and the other treats her like she has
always
been around, ie. lies with her (with my supervision) just generally is
great
with her. The problem is my in-laws cat, he hates her. Visiting is
always
an exercise in diligence to make sure he does not go near her and hurt
her.

Your inlaws need to shut him up when you visit. If you lived with him a more
involved solution might be called for.

".oO rach Oo." wrote in message
...
She just asked for advice. After all this NG is health AND behaviour.
Sheesh.


You and Lyn can both be pills so "sheesh" back at you.


--
.oO rach Oo.


"-L." wrote in message
oups.com...
Cats aren't malicious. Keep the cat sequestered and away from the
baby. he's just scared. Sheesh.

-L.

"Stormlady" don't@ email.me wrote in message
...
Karen Chuplis wrote:
Well, I don't understand why they don't just set up a room for him to be
in
while you visit. It is what I would do and is much less stressful on all
parties including the scaredy cat (I'm certain he is just scared of
strangers and especially wierd looking mini humans and not jealous.)

I don't understand why they don't either, I always want to secure the cat
in
a seperate room and I wish they would do it before we arrive, unless we
are
showing up unexpectedly, but they just won't do it. They always wait till
the cat is freaking out to remove him from the situation and then it is
really too late. The cat is upset and hissing, people are upset with the
cat for the hissing and he doesn't know what to do except run away, I am
afraid that one day his response won't be run away but attack. Usually
when
something upsets his routine (ie, uncles dog visiting, workmen in the
house)
he pees in the corner too but oddly enough he hasn't done that yet with
the
baby visits. I would like the cat to be tolerant of the baby so that when
she is older she is not terrified of the cat and so that if she tries to
pet
him as she will do with our cats, he doesn't claw her up because he has
only
bad things associated with her.

The basement is the cats alter home in the house, a bedroom would be more
punishment than the basement. He has toys down there, his litter box,
lots
of places he likes to sleep. He spends time in the basement quite often
even if not confined to the area. It is a full finished basement, rec
room,
laundry room, windows, etc.



I think you and/or your husband need to develop a strong backbone and simply
*refuse* to enter that house until the cat is placed in a secure location.
Your in-laws are being unreasonable, and you ar really enabling them when
you continue to visit under these conditions. It would be far better for
the baby (who would be safe), for you (who would not need to worry), and for
the cat (who is probably very frightened and stressed-out). This is not
intended to be antagonistic or a "personal attack" -- just a statement of
what I see as reality. Moreover, this situation will probably carry over
into other areas of your lives. The longer your in-laws get away with this
type of controlling behavior (and that's what it is), the more they are
likely to try to control your lives in other ways as well.

MaryL