Testing Gravity, (I think the kitties are right, WELL DUH!)

Hihi kitties and sekretaries,
I've been thinking about this businesss of things fallin down by themselves
and poor innocent kitties gettin blamed fur it.
Now I have a large body of data that they may be completely innocent, Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't effen
enny kitties liffing here. So it can't be blamed on kitties, and a lot of
stuff falls to the floor why right now I can see on the floor in my
immediate vicinity a new roll of skotch tape, an advertising flyer, a shirt
a pair of trousers and a sweater; a haih dryer I was using to dry some
laundry that I needed quickly, I saw that one fall myself and no one was
near the chair it waws on! there's various socks and papers. Oh! There's
another pair uv trousers I've been looking for and an empty tin that used to
have caschews in it from a couple of weeks ago. So all these things jumped
tot the floor themselves, withthe possible exceptshun uf the trousers. No
kitty wuz guilty uv ennyfing.
I have a theory that these objects all have acrophbia and because of this
they try to stay as lowe to the floor as possible,... preferrably right
there on the floor. Around this place, everything winds up on the floor
effentually.

--
Warmest Regards,
Fred
(remove FFFf from my email address to reply by email)

Duz we haz a maid servize? Souns like Unkle Fred kud uze one!!!

"Fred Williams" wrote in message
...
Hihi kitties and sekretaries,
I've been thinking about this businesss of things fallin down by
themselves
and poor innocent kitties gettin blamed fur it.
Now I have a large body of data that they may be completely innocent,
Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't
effen
enny kitties liffing here. So it can't be blamed on kitties, and a lot of
stuff falls to the floor why right now I can see on the floor in my
immediate vicinity a new roll of skotch tape, an advertising flyer, a
shirt
a pair of trousers and a sweater; a haih dryer I was using to dry some
laundry that I needed quickly, I saw that one fall myself and no one was
near the chair it waws on! there's various socks and papers. Oh! There's
another pair uv trousers I've been looking for and an empty tin that used
to
have caschews in it from a couple of weeks ago. So all these things jumped
tot the floor themselves, withthe possible exceptshun uf the trousers.
No
kitty wuz guilty uv ennyfing.
I have a theory that these objects all have acrophbia and because of this
they try to stay as lowe to the floor as possible,... preferrably right
there on the floor. Around this place, everything winds up on the floor
effentually.

--
Warmest Regards,
Fred
(remove FFFf from my email address to reply by email)

On Dec 9, 1:17*am, Fred Williams wrote:
Hihi kitties and sekretaries,
* * * * I've been thinking about this businesss of things fallin down by themselves
and poor innocent kitties gettin blamed fur it.
* * * * Now I have a large body of data that they may be completely innocent, *Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't effen
enny kitties liffing here. *So it can't be blamed on kitties, and a lot of
stuff falls to the floor why right now I can see on the floor in my
immediate vicinity a new roll of skotch tape, an advertising flyer, a shirt
a pair of trousers and a sweater; *a haih dryer I was using to dry some
laundry that I needed quickly, I saw that one fall myself and no one was
near the chair it waws on! *there's various socks and papers. *Oh! There's
another pair uv trousers I've been looking for and an empty tin that used to
have caschews in it from a couple of weeks ago. So all these things jumped
tot *the floor themselves, withthe possible exceptshun uf the trousers. *No
kitty wuz guilty uv ennyfing.
* * * * I have a theory that these objects all have acrophbia and because of this
they try to stay as lowe to the floor as possible,... preferrably right
there on the floor. *Around this place, everything winds up on the floor
effentually.


Effen a meer hoomin kan serv da kauz up SIUNS. Fangu for dis report
exonuratin kitteez efferywer

--
Missy, not hissing an da Uncl Fred

round heer, eerfqwakes kin muv stuff to da floor. We fink da rest is
done by greeblingz.

Booker


Fred Williams wrote:
Hihi kitties and sekretaries,
I've been thinking about this businesss of things fallin down by themselves
and poor innocent kitties gettin blamed fur it.
Now I have a large body of data that they may be completely innocent, Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't effen
enny kitties liffing here. So it can't be blamed on kitties, and a lot of
stuff falls to the floor why right now I can see on the floor in my
immediate vicinity a new roll of skotch tape, an advertising flyer, a shirt
a pair of trousers and a sweater; a haih dryer I was using to dry some
laundry that I needed quickly, I saw that one fall myself and no one was
near the chair it waws on! there's various socks and papers. Oh! There's
another pair uv trousers I've been looking for and an empty tin that used to
have caschews in it from a couple of weeks ago. So all these things jumped
tot the floor themselves, withthe possible exceptshun uf the trousers. No
kitty wuz guilty uv ennyfing.
I have a theory that these objects all have acrophbia and because of this
they try to stay as lowe to the floor as possible,... preferrably right
there on the floor. Around this place, everything winds up on the floor
effentually.

Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't
effen enny kitties liffing here. So it can't be blamed on kitties, and
a lot of stuff falls to the floor why right now I can see on the floor
in my immediate vicinity a new roll of skotch tape, an advertising
flyer, a shirt a pair of trousers and a sweater; a haih dryer I was
using to dry some laundry that I needed quickly, I saw that one fall
myself and no one was near the chair it waws on! there's various socks
and papers. Oh! There's another pair uv trousers I've been looking for
and an empty tin that used to have caschews in it from a couple of weeks
ago. So all these things jumped tot the floor themselves, withthe
possible exceptshun uf the trousers. No kitty wuz guilty uv ennyfing.

Oh, Unka Fred, that's dangerous! It sounds like your compartment is
infested with greeblings. Gravity greeblings, even. I think we need to
speak to someone about organizing teleporter patrol to come scan your
compartment from time to time to drive out those nasty greeblings.

Amelia

"Fred Williams" wrote in message
...
Hihi kitties and sekretaries,
I've been thinking about this businesss of things fallin down by
themselves
and poor innocent kitties gettin blamed fur it.
Now I have a large body of data that they may be completely innocent,
Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't
effen
enny kitties liffing here. So it can't be blamed on kitties, and a
lot of
stuff falls to the floor why right now I can see on the floor in my
immediate vicinity a new roll of skotch tape, an advertising flyer, a
shirt
a pair of trousers and a sweater; a haih dryer I was using to dry
some
laundry that I needed quickly, I saw that one fall myself and no one
was
near the chair it waws on! there's various socks and papers. Oh!
There's
another pair uv trousers I've been looking for and an empty tin that
used to
have caschews in it from a couple of weeks ago. So all these things
jumped
tot the floor themselves, withthe possible exceptshun uf the
trousers. No
kitty wuz guilty uv ennyfing.
I have a theory that these objects all have acrophbia and because of
this
they try to stay as lowe to the floor as possible,... preferrably
right
there on the floor. Around this place, everything winds up on the
floor
effentually.

--
Warmest Regards,
Fred
(remove FFFf from my email address to reply by email)

Attid owr heowz it iznt olny acrophbia, but geztbedfelia.
Lotza stuff, spekkullee paypurrz luff ower gezt bed.
Itz gettin hardhard tu reetsh mine windowshelph.
Pitoonya

Amelia T Cat wrote:

Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't
effen enny kitties liffing here. So it can't be blamed on kitties, and
a lot of stuff falls to the floor why right now I can see on the floor
in my immediate vicinity a new roll of skotch tape, an advertising
flyer, a shirt a pair of trousers and a sweater; a haih dryer I was
using to dry some laundry that I needed quickly, I saw that one fall
myself and no one was near the chair it waws on! there's various socks
and papers. Oh! There's another pair uv trousers I've been looking for
and an empty tin that used to have caschews in it from a couple of weeks
ago. So all these things jumped tot the floor themselves, withthe
possible exceptshun uf the trousers. No kitty wuz guilty uv ennyfing.

Oh, Unka Fred, that's dangerous! It sounds like your compartment is
infested with greeblings. Gravity greeblings, even. I think we need to
speak to someone about organizing teleporter patrol to come scan your
compartment from time to time to drive out those nasty greeblings.

Amelia

Fangu. I'm going to be fighting some of these greeblings over the next two
days which I have off. Of course I have other fings tu du as well.

--
Regards,
Fred
(remove FFFf from my email address to reply by email)

Purroooffftt!

Unca Fred rrote:

Hihi kitties and sekretaries,
I've been thinking about this businesss of things fallin down by themselves
and poor innocent kitties gettin blamed fur it.
Now I have a large body of data that they may be completely innocent, Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't effen

O, itz definimitely greeblingz. More partikerlarly itz da kind kalled
Grabbitiez!

Owr own Mr. TSE (RB) was expurrt about greeblingz of awl kindz and he
left manny manny notezbookz of furry lerned studiez of da fennommenonz
of greeblingz. Da Grabbity greeblingz are zum of da wurst of all da
kindz, cuz dey duz zo manny kindz of damagez and mozt ov awl, duz zo
manny blamez on da poor katzen (an da puppenz, tu, sez
Shadow-da-Pup!).

Wun way to get ridd of da Grabbitiez iz to keep evfurryting onna da
floorz, zo dey haff nozzing to push down, dat iz zo. But den dat duz
make da floorz kinda krowdeded an alzo cauzez lotz hopportunitiez for
da Trip-em-Upz greeblingz to tangle humiz an katzenz feetz an make dem
fall down all kindz wayz.

Mebbe Unca Fred, an annywun elze wif too manny Grabbitiez around da
plaze, cud burn zum garlikz an zulfur in a big mettal pan in da middle
ov da rum? Dat will chaze away almosz anyting.

Chuggz,
GT



- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The Fur Conspiracy:
Mr. GrowlTiger the Depradatator (VC),
Ms. Chessie the Calico,
Ms. Misty of Many Colors,
Shadow da Pup,
also Mr. TigerSam (PC) and Clarence da Choklit Moose
[Edit it to make it work.]

The Fur Conspiracy wrote:
Purroooffftt!

Unca Fred rrote:

Hihi kitties and sekretaries,
I've been thinking about this businesss of things fallin down by themselves
and poor innocent kitties gettin blamed fur it.
Now I have a large body of data that they may be completely innocent, Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't effen

O, itz definimitely greeblingz. More partikerlarly itz da kind kalled
Grabbitiez!

Owr own Mr. TSE (RB) was expurrt about greeblingz of awl kindz and he
left manny manny notezbookz of furry lerned studiez of da fennommenonz
of greeblingz. Da Grabbity greeblingz are zum of da wurst of all da
kindz, cuz dey duz zo manny kindz of damagez and mozt ov awl, duz zo
manny blamez on da poor katzen (an da puppenz, tu, sez
Shadow-da-Pup!).

Wun way to get ridd of da Grabbitiez iz to keep evfurryting onna da
floorz, zo dey haff nozzing to push down, dat iz zo. But den dat duz
make da floorz kinda krowdeded an alzo cauzez lotz hopportunitiez for
da Trip-em-Upz greeblingz to tangle humiz an katzenz feetz an make dem
fall down all kindz wayz.

Mebbe Unca Fred, an annywun elze wif too manny Grabbitiez around da
plaze, cud burn zum garlikz an zulfur in a big mettal pan in da middle
ov da rum? Dat will chaze away almosz anyting.

Chuggz,
GT



- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The Fur Conspiracy:
Mr. GrowlTiger the Depradatator (VC),
Ms. Chessie the Calico,
Ms. Misty of Many Colors,
Shadow da Pup,
also Mr. TigerSam (PC) and Clarence da Choklit Moose
[Edit it to make it work.]


Sheesh! Dat wud chaz miownself away tooo! TuTu

On Dec 9, 12:17*am, Fred Williams wrote:
Hihi kitties and sekretaries,
* * * * I've been thinking about this businesss of things fallin down by themselves
and poor innocent kitties gettin blamed fur it.
* * * * Now I have a large body of data that they may be completely innocent, *Here
in my small apartment many things wind up on tha floor and there isn't effen
enny kitties liffing here. *So it can't be blamed on kitties, and a lot of
stuff falls to the floor why right now I can see on the floor in my
immediate vicinity a new roll of skotch tape, an advertising flyer, a shirt
a pair of trousers and a sweater; *a haih dryer I was using to dry some
laundry that I needed quickly, I saw that one fall myself and no one was
near the chair it waws on! *there's various socks and papers. *Oh! There's
another pair uv trousers I've been looking for and an empty tin that used to
have caschews in it from a couple of weeks ago. So all these things jumped
tot *the floor themselves, withthe possible exceptshun uf the trousers. *No
kitty wuz guilty uv ennyfing.
* * * * I have a theory that these objects all have acrophbia and because of this
they try to stay as lowe to the floor as possible,... preferrably right
there on the floor. *Around this place, everything winds up on the floor
effentually.

--
Warmest Regards,
Fred
(remove FFFf from my email address to reply by email)

gnaow dad eye hab past duh fife yeer mark (wast joon or joowhy),
meowmie sez I yam a furry fottful kitty (fangyoo meowmie, anna sayme
too yoo) an I hazza fott boutted yoor purrdikkamint, dat itted is da
wurk ob a OUTKitty, sneekink intoo yoor own hous.
As fur du fing dat suppozedwy gottid onna fwoor by itted own sewf,
mine furvur feery hiss dat itted wuz aweddy defurstayblized bye da
pweebeeus abdibitties ob da cat burgwer sew dat it wud faw down afdur
da kitty weff dustwakting surspitshun fwum itz own sneeky sewf.

Furry pawzabl, beclawz usses kitteez can bee bofe fottful andt
kweffur.

MeOwy, froo finking fotts fur a wile tew make tyme fur gnapping.