I'm feeling like a horrible pet owner...

Hi everyone,

My 3 year old fur baby is at the vets right now after having her teeth
de-scaled and an id chip injection. We got her from an animal rescue place
a year ago and she had the usual medical problems: fleas, ear mites and cat
flu. But after taking her to the vet after two weeks of drops and
medication he gave her a clean bill of health. So for the last year we've
carried on as usual...spoiling and loving our little kitty. She was in last
week for her yearly injection and the vet (different one from before) was
shocked at the state of her teeth, and so was I. She had horrendous plaque
build up, angry inflammed gums and a couple brown teeth. I couldn't believe
it. So we booked her in to have her teeth done today.

I've just gotten off the phone with the vets and my poor little girl has to
stay for a few more hours. It turns out they had to remove a couple teeth
because they were rotten!! I'm feeling so horrible. I love her to pieces,
but I feel like I have let her down by not taking proper care of her.
Before we got her she had not had a great life. The shelter told us she had
3 different homes before being dropped off outside their door. She was thin
and malnourished and relied on the shelter's 5pm feeding schedule (wet
food). I've had cats before and I have never given them wet food once they
were adults and they've never had teeth problems. But Cilla was different.
We tried to wean her off of it when we first brought her home but she
refused to eat dry food and would howl if we didn't give her the wet stuff.
My husband and I wanted her to be happy and to begin to feel settled with us
so we have carried on with wet food once a day in addition to dry. Is this
the reason her teeth have gotten so bad?? Have we done this to her?

As much as we love her, a part of me is feeling like we don't deserve her,
like we should find another home for her. I almost feel like I have abused
her by not taking care of her like we should have. I think I just need some
help. How do we get her off the wet food without making her unhappy? She
is just like a child to me and I love her desperately. I just want her to
be happy and feel secure. Any ideas?

Thanks
Summer

Don't beat yourself up with guilt, you've done perfectly well by this cat.
A lot of cats have to have teeth cleaning and even tooth removal, just as we
humans do. You don't have to take her off canned food (some say it's
actually better than dry). What you might want to do is try to start
brushing her teeth. PetSmart sells pet toothbrushes and meat-flavored
toothpaste for cats. If she won't allow you to do this, don't fret (mine
would never allow it), just have the vet check her teeth when she gets her
vacs and have them cleaned when needed (my fourteen-year-old only had to
have it done twice, but mine eat Science Diet dry).

Hugs,

CatNipped

"SummerC" wrote in message
...
Hi everyone,

My 3 year old fur baby is at the vets right now after having her teeth
de-scaled and an id chip injection. We got her from an animal rescue
place
a year ago and she had the usual medical problems: fleas, ear mites and
cat
flu. But after taking her to the vet after two weeks of drops and
medication he gave her a clean bill of health. So for the last year we've
carried on as usual...spoiling and loving our little kitty. She was in
last
week for her yearly injection and the vet (different one from before) was
shocked at the state of her teeth, and so was I. She had horrendous
plaque
build up, angry inflammed gums and a couple brown teeth. I couldn't
believe
it. So we booked her in to have her teeth done today.

I've just gotten off the phone with the vets and my poor little girl has
to
stay for a few more hours. It turns out they had to remove a couple teeth
because they were rotten!! I'm feeling so horrible. I love her to
pieces,
but I feel like I have let her down by not taking proper care of her.
Before we got her she had not had a great life. The shelter told us she
had
3 different homes before being dropped off outside their door. She was
thin
and malnourished and relied on the shelter's 5pm feeding schedule (wet
food). I've had cats before and I have never given them wet food once
they
were adults and they've never had teeth problems. But Cilla was
different.
We tried to wean her off of it when we first brought her home but she
refused to eat dry food and would howl if we didn't give her the wet
stuff.
My husband and I wanted her to be happy and to begin to feel settled with
us
so we have carried on with wet food once a day in addition to dry. Is
this
the reason her teeth have gotten so bad?? Have we done this to her?

As much as we love her, a part of me is feeling like we don't deserve her,
like we should find another home for her. I almost feel like I have
abused
her by not taking care of her like we should have. I think I just need
some
help. How do we get her off the wet food without making her unhappy? She
is just like a child to me and I love her desperately. I just want her to
be happy and feel secure. Any ideas?

Thanks
Summer

Don't beat yourself up with guilt, you've done perfectly well by this cat.
A lot of cats have to have teeth cleaning and even tooth removal, just as we
humans do. You don't have to take her off canned food (some say it's
actually better than dry). What you might want to do is try to start
brushing her teeth. PetSmart sells pet toothbrushes and meat-flavored
toothpaste for cats. If she won't allow you to do this, don't fret (mine
would never allow it), just have the vet check her teeth when she gets her
vacs and have them cleaned when needed (my fourteen-year-old only had to
have it done twice, but mine eat Science Diet dry).

Hugs,

CatNipped

"SummerC" wrote in message
...
Hi everyone,

My 3 year old fur baby is at the vets right now after having her teeth
de-scaled and an id chip injection. We got her from an animal rescue
place
a year ago and she had the usual medical problems: fleas, ear mites and
cat
flu. But after taking her to the vet after two weeks of drops and
medication he gave her a clean bill of health. So for the last year we've
carried on as usual...spoiling and loving our little kitty. She was in
last
week for her yearly injection and the vet (different one from before) was
shocked at the state of her teeth, and so was I. She had horrendous
plaque
build up, angry inflammed gums and a couple brown teeth. I couldn't
believe
it. So we booked her in to have her teeth done today.

I've just gotten off the phone with the vets and my poor little girl has
to
stay for a few more hours. It turns out they had to remove a couple teeth
because they were rotten!! I'm feeling so horrible. I love her to
pieces,
but I feel like I have let her down by not taking proper care of her.
Before we got her she had not had a great life. The shelter told us she
had
3 different homes before being dropped off outside their door. She was
thin
and malnourished and relied on the shelter's 5pm feeding schedule (wet
food). I've had cats before and I have never given them wet food once
they
were adults and they've never had teeth problems. But Cilla was
different.
We tried to wean her off of it when we first brought her home but she
refused to eat dry food and would howl if we didn't give her the wet
stuff.
My husband and I wanted her to be happy and to begin to feel settled with
us
so we have carried on with wet food once a day in addition to dry. Is
this
the reason her teeth have gotten so bad?? Have we done this to her?

As much as we love her, a part of me is feeling like we don't deserve her,
like we should find another home for her. I almost feel like I have
abused
her by not taking care of her like we should have. I think I just need
some
help. How do we get her off the wet food without making her unhappy? She
is just like a child to me and I love her desperately. I just want her to
be happy and feel secure. Any ideas?

Thanks
Summer

Don't beat yourself up with guilt, you've done perfectly well by this cat.
A lot of cats have to have teeth cleaning and even tooth removal, just as we
humans do. You don't have to take her off canned food (some say it's
actually better than dry). What you might want to do is try to start
brushing her teeth. PetSmart sells pet toothbrushes and meat-flavored
toothpaste for cats. If she won't allow you to do this, don't fret (mine
would never allow it), just have the vet check her teeth when she gets her
vacs and have them cleaned when needed (my fourteen-year-old only had to
have it done twice, but mine eat Science Diet dry).

Hugs,

CatNipped

"SummerC" wrote in message
...
Hi everyone,

My 3 year old fur baby is at the vets right now after having her teeth
de-scaled and an id chip injection. We got her from an animal rescue
place
a year ago and she had the usual medical problems: fleas, ear mites and
cat
flu. But after taking her to the vet after two weeks of drops and
medication he gave her a clean bill of health. So for the last year we've
carried on as usual...spoiling and loving our little kitty. She was in
last
week for her yearly injection and the vet (different one from before) was
shocked at the state of her teeth, and so was I. She had horrendous
plaque
build up, angry inflammed gums and a couple brown teeth. I couldn't
believe
it. So we booked her in to have her teeth done today.

I've just gotten off the phone with the vets and my poor little girl has
to
stay for a few more hours. It turns out they had to remove a couple teeth
because they were rotten!! I'm feeling so horrible. I love her to
pieces,
but I feel like I have let her down by not taking proper care of her.
Before we got her she had not had a great life. The shelter told us she
had
3 different homes before being dropped off outside their door. She was
thin
and malnourished and relied on the shelter's 5pm feeding schedule (wet
food). I've had cats before and I have never given them wet food once
they
were adults and they've never had teeth problems. But Cilla was
different.
We tried to wean her off of it when we first brought her home but she
refused to eat dry food and would howl if we didn't give her the wet
stuff.
My husband and I wanted her to be happy and to begin to feel settled with
us
so we have carried on with wet food once a day in addition to dry. Is
this
the reason her teeth have gotten so bad?? Have we done this to her?

As much as we love her, a part of me is feeling like we don't deserve her,
like we should find another home for her. I almost feel like I have
abused
her by not taking care of her like we should have. I think I just need
some
help. How do we get her off the wet food without making her unhappy? She
is just like a child to me and I love her desperately. I just want her to
be happy and feel secure. Any ideas?

Thanks
Summer

"SummerC"

writes:

My 3 year old fur baby is at the vets right now after having her teeth
de-scaled and an id chip injection. We got her from an animal rescue place
a year ago and she had the usual medical problems: fleas, ear mites and cat
flu. But after taking her to the vet after two weeks of drops and
medication he gave her a clean bill of health. So for the last year we've
carried on as usual...spoiling and loving our little kitty. She was in last
week for her yearly injection and the vet (different one from before) was
shocked at the state of her teeth, and so was I. She had horrendous plaque
build up, angry inflammed gums and a couple brown teeth. I couldn't believe
it. So we booked her in to have her teeth done today.

I've just gotten off the phone with the vets and my poor little girl has to
stay for a few more hours. It turns out they had to remove a couple teeth
because they were rotten!! I'm feeling so horrible. I love her to pieces,
but I feel like I have let her down by not taking proper care of her.
Before we got her she had not had a great life. The shelter told us she had
3 different homes before being dropped off outside their door. She was thin
and malnourished and relied on the shelter's 5pm feeding schedule (wet
food). I've had cats before and I have never given them wet food once they
were adults and they've never had teeth problems. But Cilla was different.
We tried to wean her off of it when we first brought her home but she
refused to eat dry food and would howl if we didn't give her the wet stuff.
My husband and I wanted her to be happy and to begin to feel settled with us
so we have carried on with wet food once a day in addition to dry. Is this
the reason her teeth have gotten so bad?? Have we done this to her?

As much as we love her, a part of me is feeling like we don't deserve her,
like we should find another home for her. I almost feel like I have abused
her by not taking care of her like we should have. I think I just need some
help. How do we get her off the wet food without making her unhappy? She
is just like a child to me and I love her desperately. I just want her to
be happy and feel secure. Any ideas?

My main idea is that you're beating yourself up unnecessarily, and it's not
making a lot of sense to me as to why you're so hard on yourself, calling
yourself undeserving and thinking you should find her another home and all
that. You rescued her and have given her a good life that she almost didn't
have without you. You've loved her and cared for her. What more can you do?

Eight years ago, I got a 1-year-old cat who had been passed around, neglected,
and probably abused. He's had 3 dentals and several teeth pulled. It never
occurred to me to blame myself, because my vet said "some pets just have bad
teeth," and I believed her. None of my other cats have had dental problems,
and I've fed them all the same thing, so that reinforces the idea that this one
cat just has bad teeth. I think your cat just has bad teeth, not a bad owner.

And wet food is supposed to be better for them than dry, so you're not doing
anything awful. Keep feeding her the wet food. Or better yet, talk to your
vet about dental care and see if he has any diet advice. My vet wants her
people to feed their pets wet food primarily, if not exclusively.

Last night I took a good friend to a pet bereavement group therapy session.
There were people there who'd rescued horribly abused animals, given them
wonderful lives, then had to put them to sleep when they became sick, elderly,
and in pain. And everyone was second-guessing themselves as to decisions they
made, etc., even though to me (and to the therapist, apparently) it sounded
like everyone did as much as they could. The therapist said that if we all
made a list of the good things we did for the pets and a list of the bad
decisions we made, the first list would be very very long, and the second list
would be very very short. And if we made a third list of the things we
knowingly did wrong, it would probably have nothing on it.

Please think about that. You're a good pet owner. You've done nothing wrong.
Your cat just has bad teeth.

Daria
Timing Is Everything.

"SummerC"

writes:

My 3 year old fur baby is at the vets right now after having her teeth
de-scaled and an id chip injection. We got her from an animal rescue place
a year ago and she had the usual medical problems: fleas, ear mites and cat
flu. But after taking her to the vet after two weeks of drops and
medication he gave her a clean bill of health. So for the last year we've
carried on as usual...spoiling and loving our little kitty. She was in last
week for her yearly injection and the vet (different one from before) was
shocked at the state of her teeth, and so was I. She had horrendous plaque
build up, angry inflammed gums and a couple brown teeth. I couldn't believe
it. So we booked her in to have her teeth done today.

I've just gotten off the phone with the vets and my poor little girl has to
stay for a few more hours. It turns out they had to remove a couple teeth
because they were rotten!! I'm feeling so horrible. I love her to pieces,
but I feel like I have let her down by not taking proper care of her.
Before we got her she had not had a great life. The shelter told us she had
3 different homes before being dropped off outside their door. She was thin
and malnourished and relied on the shelter's 5pm feeding schedule (wet
food). I've had cats before and I have never given them wet food once they
were adults and they've never had teeth problems. But Cilla was different.
We tried to wean her off of it when we first brought her home but she
refused to eat dry food and would howl if we didn't give her the wet stuff.
My husband and I wanted her to be happy and to begin to feel settled with us
so we have carried on with wet food once a day in addition to dry. Is this
the reason her teeth have gotten so bad?? Have we done this to her?

As much as we love her, a part of me is feeling like we don't deserve her,
like we should find another home for her. I almost feel like I have abused
her by not taking care of her like we should have. I think I just need some
help. How do we get her off the wet food without making her unhappy? She
is just like a child to me and I love her desperately. I just want her to
be happy and feel secure. Any ideas?

My main idea is that you're beating yourself up unnecessarily, and it's not
making a lot of sense to me as to why you're so hard on yourself, calling
yourself undeserving and thinking you should find her another home and all
that. You rescued her and have given her a good life that she almost didn't
have without you. You've loved her and cared for her. What more can you do?

Eight years ago, I got a 1-year-old cat who had been passed around, neglected,
and probably abused. He's had 3 dentals and several teeth pulled. It never
occurred to me to blame myself, because my vet said "some pets just have bad
teeth," and I believed her. None of my other cats have had dental problems,
and I've fed them all the same thing, so that reinforces the idea that this one
cat just has bad teeth. I think your cat just has bad teeth, not a bad owner.

And wet food is supposed to be better for them than dry, so you're not doing
anything awful. Keep feeding her the wet food. Or better yet, talk to your
vet about dental care and see if he has any diet advice. My vet wants her
people to feed their pets wet food primarily, if not exclusively.

Last night I took a good friend to a pet bereavement group therapy session.
There were people there who'd rescued horribly abused animals, given them
wonderful lives, then had to put them to sleep when they became sick, elderly,
and in pain. And everyone was second-guessing themselves as to decisions they
made, etc., even though to me (and to the therapist, apparently) it sounded
like everyone did as much as they could. The therapist said that if we all
made a list of the good things we did for the pets and a list of the bad
decisions we made, the first list would be very very long, and the second list
would be very very short. And if we made a third list of the things we
knowingly did wrong, it would probably have nothing on it.

Please think about that. You're a good pet owner. You've done nothing wrong.
Your cat just has bad teeth.

Daria
Timing Is Everything.

"SummerC"

writes:

My 3 year old fur baby is at the vets right now after having her teeth
de-scaled and an id chip injection. We got her from an animal rescue place
a year ago and she had the usual medical problems: fleas, ear mites and cat
flu. But after taking her to the vet after two weeks of drops and
medication he gave her a clean bill of health. So for the last year we've
carried on as usual...spoiling and loving our little kitty. She was in last
week for her yearly injection and the vet (different one from before) was
shocked at the state of her teeth, and so was I. She had horrendous plaque
build up, angry inflammed gums and a couple brown teeth. I couldn't believe
it. So we booked her in to have her teeth done today.

I've just gotten off the phone with the vets and my poor little girl has to
stay for a few more hours. It turns out they had to remove a couple teeth
because they were rotten!! I'm feeling so horrible. I love her to pieces,
but I feel like I have let her down by not taking proper care of her.
Before we got her she had not had a great life. The shelter told us she had
3 different homes before being dropped off outside their door. She was thin
and malnourished and relied on the shelter's 5pm feeding schedule (wet
food). I've had cats before and I have never given them wet food once they
were adults and they've never had teeth problems. But Cilla was different.
We tried to wean her off of it when we first brought her home but she
refused to eat dry food and would howl if we didn't give her the wet stuff.
My husband and I wanted her to be happy and to begin to feel settled with us
so we have carried on with wet food once a day in addition to dry. Is this
the reason her teeth have gotten so bad?? Have we done this to her?

As much as we love her, a part of me is feeling like we don't deserve her,
like we should find another home for her. I almost feel like I have abused
her by not taking care of her like we should have. I think I just need some
help. How do we get her off the wet food without making her unhappy? She
is just like a child to me and I love her desperately. I just want her to
be happy and feel secure. Any ideas?

My main idea is that you're beating yourself up unnecessarily, and it's not
making a lot of sense to me as to why you're so hard on yourself, calling
yourself undeserving and thinking you should find her another home and all
that. You rescued her and have given her a good life that she almost didn't
have without you. You've loved her and cared for her. What more can you do?

Eight years ago, I got a 1-year-old cat who had been passed around, neglected,
and probably abused. He's had 3 dentals and several teeth pulled. It never
occurred to me to blame myself, because my vet said "some pets just have bad
teeth," and I believed her. None of my other cats have had dental problems,
and I've fed them all the same thing, so that reinforces the idea that this one
cat just has bad teeth. I think your cat just has bad teeth, not a bad owner.

And wet food is supposed to be better for them than dry, so you're not doing
anything awful. Keep feeding her the wet food. Or better yet, talk to your
vet about dental care and see if he has any diet advice. My vet wants her
people to feed their pets wet food primarily, if not exclusively.

Last night I took a good friend to a pet bereavement group therapy session.
There were people there who'd rescued horribly abused animals, given them
wonderful lives, then had to put them to sleep when they became sick, elderly,
and in pain. And everyone was second-guessing themselves as to decisions they
made, etc., even though to me (and to the therapist, apparently) it sounded
like everyone did as much as they could. The therapist said that if we all
made a list of the good things we did for the pets and a list of the bad
decisions we made, the first list would be very very long, and the second list
would be very very short. And if we made a third list of the things we
knowingly did wrong, it would probably have nothing on it.

Please think about that. You're a good pet owner. You've done nothing wrong.
Your cat just has bad teeth.

Daria
Timing Is Everything.

It *isn't* your fault and you are doing your best. Some cats DO have bad
teeth or gums genetically. As long as you are getting kitty vetted and that
is the most important thing.

It *isn't* your fault and you are doing your best. Some cats DO have bad
teeth or gums genetically. As long as you are getting kitty vetted and that
is the most important thing.

It *isn't* your fault and you are doing your best. Some cats DO have bad
teeth or gums genetically. As long as you are getting kitty vetted and that
is the most important thing.