Happy Birthday, Cheryl s.

In ,
polonca12000 composed with style:
We are thinking of you, sending you virtual hugs, best wishes and
purrs in the hopes that some day you may meet a child who will need
a grandmother just like you will need a grandchild,

I like that.

Cheryl wrote:

I'm ok. Sort of. I have been with you during this with Rob, I have
read it all and I am scared and have faith all at the same time. I'm
in Maryland and if I left for the holidays my parents would kill me.
(well they are worried about me, they stop by at any time without
warning just to see how I "really" am). They've caught me in bed
still sleeping at 2pm on a Saturday or two or three. I do not want to
worry them or anyone. I know they worry about me. I have the number
of a therapist that I really should see. My uncle who is a deacon
with the Catholic church gave me a book, a handbook for grief and he
told me I should have already read it. I asked him what if I don't
want to feel better yet. He said everyone he's given the book to read
it quickly. I just can't feel better yet. I don';t want to.


Cheryl, see the therapist. S/he won't rush you through your grief, and
may be able to help you work the worst of it out. Being in bed that
late in the afternoon is generally a sign of depression, and that can
really cause you some problems.

You are not ready to let go of your grief yet, and that is
understandable. Letting go of your grief is like losing the person
you're grieving for. Reading the book won't take your grief away, but
it may help you handle it a little bit better.

Someday, when you are ready, you will feel like coming on line and
telling us a story or two about your son. You'll want to tell us how he
loved his cat, or about the time he won a competition, or some other
aspect of his personality. I will read those stories with gratitude as
your son is living his life again through your recollections about him.
You will bring him back to life and show us all why he should be
remembered and his life honored. At that time, you will be truly on the
road to being healed and we shall celebrate for you both.

Pam S.

in article , Tanada at
wrote on 11/22/03 9:37 PM:

You are not ready to let go of your grief yet, and that is
understandable. Letting go of your grief is like losing the person
you're grieving for. Reading the book won't take your grief away, but
it may help you handle it a little bit better.

You know, this made me think, I don't think that one let's to of grief
really. It's more like you learn to incorporate it in a handalable way. I
agree with Pam Cheryl and am sending mega purrs your way to find your path.

Karen

"Karen" wrote

You know, this made me think, I don't think that one let's to of grief
really. It's more like you learn to incorporate it in a handalable way. I
agree with Pam Cheryl and am sending mega purrs your way to find your
path.


You are right, Karen, now that I think of it. I still grieve for my Dad, and
he passed away in 1988, but it does ease up. There's a period of intense
grieving, when you can hardly think of anything else, and then it sort of
moves to the background, but never goes away completely.

Purrs and hugs to Cheryl. You have the right to grieve in your own way. Just
don't feel that you are letting your son down if your grief eases up a bit.
I'm sure he wouldn't want you to be sad all the time for the rest of your
life.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi

Hi Cheryl,

Happy Birthday just because. You are a wonderful member of this group and
we'd be empty and alone without you. I hope you did something wonderfully
indulgent and possibly covered with chocolate for your special day.

Happy Belated Birthday

Hazel Az



"Cheryl" wrote in message
...
Thank you, you guys. You have made me cry. This isn't a happy
birthday. 41 now and I can't help but feel that the best part of my
life is over. It isn't the number. What else is left for me now. I
will never have grandbabies and I'm still really ****ed about what
life has handed me. I don't mean to post negatively but that is how I
feel. I know I can say that here.