Older Cat, New Kitten

Hi folks,

Newbie here. I have a beloved older male cat, Dickson, who's about 12.
He's been on his own for about 3 years, since his mother died.

My girlfriend really wants to get a new kitten. We live in a large
loft, but there's really only one logical place for the existance of
litter boxes and cat food (for the long term).

From some reading on the 'net, I understood that we would have fewer
adjustment problems if the kitten were a female. Is that true? The
girlfriend wants an Orange kitten, and its hard to find a female at the
local shelters, so I'm wondering how important the gender of the kitten
is. What I don't want is dominance struggles a year from now when the
kitten gets older.

Thanks in advance,

Gideon

With a kitten, I don't think the gender matters much. A kitten is much less
threatening.
Gail
wrote in message
oups.com...
Hi folks,

Newbie here. I have a beloved older male cat, Dickson, who's about 12.
He's been on his own for about 3 years, since his mother died.

My girlfriend really wants to get a new kitten. We live in a large
loft, but there's really only one logical place for the existance of
litter boxes and cat food (for the long term).

From some reading on the 'net, I understood that we would have fewer
adjustment problems if the kitten were a female. Is that true? The
girlfriend wants an Orange kitten, and its hard to find a female at the
local shelters, so I'm wondering how important the gender of the kitten
is. What I don't want is dominance struggles a year from now when the
kitten gets older.

Thanks in advance,

Gideon

wrote in news:1106321757.563226.255780
@z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com:

My girlfriend really wants to get a new kitten. We live in a large
loft, but there's really only one logical place for the existance of
litter boxes and cat food (for the long term).

From some reading on the 'net, I understood that we would have fewer
adjustment problems if the kitten were a female. Is that true? The
girlfriend wants an Orange kitten, and its hard to find a female at the
local shelters, so I'm wondering how important the gender of the kitten
is. What I don't want is dominance struggles a year from now when the
kitten gets older.


I think the chemistry between two cats is pretty unpredictable, although
others may disagree. I think getting a kitten is a good idea but I don't
know whether the gender matters (as it does mostly for dogs). But I got
Madeline (who was 4 months old) when Nickleby was 7 or 8, and they really
never got along despite living together for 10 years -- they came to
tolerate each other and kept each other company, and they stopped hissing
at each other after an initial period of hell. I think Madeline was good
for Nickleby but they never developed the close relationship I had hoped
for. I do have some deceptive pictures of them both lying on my desk,
which was the closest they would get to each other -- only *I* know that
Madeline was up there first, and Nickleby jumped up and made her move to
an inferior (less sunny) spot.

Anyway, what is my point? It is just that I don't think you can tell how
two cats are going to get along, and the best you can do is pick a kitten
whose temperament you like (color should probably be less important) and
hope that s/he then meshes with the other cat whose temperament you like.
Steel yourself for lots of supervising at first, and don't let them
torment each other, and I'm sure they will work everything out.

Right now I have a cat and a dog, and they seem to like and tolerate each
other much better than my former two cats ever did -- they don't compete
for territory, and I think they're good company for each other. So that's
something to consider if your primary motivation is getting company for
your first cat.

--Catherine
& Rosalie the calico

On 2005-01-21, ceb penned:

Right now I have a cat and a dog, and they seem to like and tolerate each
other much better than my former two cats ever did -- they don't compete for
territory, and I think they're good company for each other. So that's
something to consider if your primary motivation is getting company for your
first cat.

This has also been my experience. I got Oscar to keep my aging dog Puma
company, and they got along fine. Then I moved into my brother's townhouse
and Oscar had to deal with a very large young dog. It was a little more
exciting, but they never tried to hurt each other.

Then I tried to adopt Eros, a young cat. He was about a year and a half old.
Oscar couldn't get away from Eros. Our house became a battleground. Eros
wanted to get Oscar's attention to play; Oscar wanted nothing to do with him.
She moved under the bed and wouldn't get out. The few times she tried to
defend herself from his advances, she got the worst of it and now has a nick
in her ear as a permanent souvenir.

I'm not saying that getting another cat can't work; plenty of people have done
so. But I would agree that cats are unpredictable. Also, the manager of the
shelter told me as much; she said that you can never tell whether any two cats
will get along.

--
monique, roommate of Oscar the (female) grouch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eros was adopted! Eros has a home now! *cheer!*

wrote:

From some reading on the 'net, I understood that we would have fewer
adjustment problems if the kitten were a female. Is that true? The
girlfriend wants an Orange kitten, and its hard to find a female at the
local shelters, so I'm wondering how important the gender of the kitten
is. What I don't want is dominance struggles a year from now when the
kitten gets older.

Google this group for past experiences (mine should be out there
somewhere) and theories. It seems as if 2 females are the most likely to
have issues with each other from what I've read.

We had an older male cat and brought a new female in a few years ago (I
think she might've been about a year old) and there were no real issues.
But when he died and we brought a new female kitten in (the existing
female was about 5 and the kitten was about 4 months old - this was about
a year or so ago), it got real strange real quick. But, as others have
said, a *large* part is the personalities of the cats themselves. Good
luck.

brian
--
If you want to reply to this message by mail, you will
have to change the reply address to

Anyway, what is my point? It is just that I don't think you can tell
how
two cats are going to get along, and the best you can do is pick a
kitten
whose temperament you like (color should probably be less important)

Sadly, the color issue seems to be a big deal to the girlfriend. I
think its a sentimental issue because of a former cat of hers. Oh
well...

Thanks for the advice all.

Gideon

All I can say is that you might want to try with an older cat when your
1st cat is such a senior. We got a kitten to keep one of our older
cats company (she was mourning the loss of her best pal) and it did not
work out at all! While, in theory, a kitten is less threatening to an
established cat, they are still kittens after all. Kittens have *way*
more life force than a 12 year old cat. Your senior will probably want
to mostly sleep while the kitten will want to mostly play--not a happy
combination, I can assure you.

It's not fair to a kitten to have to constantly chase them away from
your poor older cat who wants to simply hang out and have some peace.
The kitten will need to play and romp and there will be no one else to
bug but your senior. And I don't even want to go into how such stress
can effect a 12 year old kitty.....

So, my advice would be to pick a mellow older cat. The odds of the two
of them getting along will be the same, and perhaps better than with a
kitten simply because an older cat won't be chasing your senior and
literally driving them nuts. Good luck!

dragon

I agree. Twelve is pretty darned old to have a baby brother! Your cat
might get pretty grouchy after getting jumped on twenty times a day.
Try a friendly cat - maybe around 5 years old or so - who has
experience living with other cats. They may not adore each other (or
they may), but they'll probably be able to establish rules for
co-existence. Even when they don't love each other madly, I think the
drama of their daily interactions is sort've a stimulant for them :

A very young kitten kinda turns your old guy into a cat dad. Not every
old coot has it in them :
And boy are there alot of sweet five year old cats that need homes....

I agree with Catherine. My male cat was 14 when I got a male kitten....an
orange tabby, by the way. This was a little over a year ago. They aren't
best buds, but they get along okay, better than I thought, actually. There
is still some fighting that sometimes gets out of hand (or at least it
sounds like it does). I think what's important is how you introduce the 2
cats. Do it very slowly. It was over a month before I would leave my 2
together alone. Make sure they both have their own spaces.

Sue

"ceb" wrote in message
...
wrote in news:1106321757.563226.255780
@z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com:

My girlfriend really wants to get a new kitten. We live in a large
loft, but there's really only one logical place for the existance of
litter boxes and cat food (for the long term).

From some reading on the 'net, I understood that we would have fewer
adjustment problems if the kitten were a female. Is that true? The
girlfriend wants an Orange kitten, and its hard to find a female at the
local shelters, so I'm wondering how important the gender of the kitten
is. What I don't want is dominance struggles a year from now when the
kitten gets older.


I think the chemistry between two cats is pretty unpredictable, although
others may disagree. I think getting a kitten is a good idea but I don't
know whether the gender matters (as it does mostly for dogs). But I got
Madeline (who was 4 months old) when Nickleby was 7 or 8, and they really
never got along despite living together for 10 years -- they came to
tolerate each other and kept each other company, and they stopped hissing
at each other after an initial period of hell. I think Madeline was good
for Nickleby but they never developed the close relationship I had hoped
for. I do have some deceptive pictures of them both lying on my desk,
which was the closest they would get to each other -- only *I* know that
Madeline was up there first, and Nickleby jumped up and made her move to
an inferior (less sunny) spot.

Anyway, what is my point? It is just that I don't think you can tell how
two cats are going to get along, and the best you can do is pick a kitten
whose temperament you like (color should probably be less important) and
hope that s/he then meshes with the other cat whose temperament you like.
Steel yourself for lots of supervising at first, and don't let them
torment each other, and I'm sure they will work everything out.

Right now I have a cat and a dog, and they seem to like and tolerate each
other much better than my former two cats ever did -- they don't compete
for territory, and I think they're good company for each other. So that's
something to consider if your primary motivation is getting company for
your first cat.

--Catherine
& Rosalie the calico

Finding an orange female is going to be tough. Because of that gene, 80%
of all orange tabbies are male.

How about a tortoiseshell (black and orange) or calico? They are always
female (well, unless you have a genetic "mistake,"), and those two can
have quite a bit of orange.

Rhonda


wrote:

The
girlfriend wants an Orange kitten, and its hard to find a female at the
local shelters, so I'm wondering how important the gender of the kitten
is.