I'm in trouble with Patty again!

Hi, All
These darn cats are always getting me into trouble with Patty, and it's
not my fault (this time)!
As some of you may remember, I like my cigars. They comfort me, they
soothe me (all right, I'm addicted), but it's more socially acceptable
than sitting around sucking my thumb.
So yesterday Spirit saw me put one (cigar, not thumb) in my mouth with
the appearance of deriving great pleasure from it and decided whatever I
was eating, she wanted some, too. Naturally I hogged the stogie all for
myself and didn't let her have any. Oreo saw Spirit watching me and
joined her. Now I have two little moochers mewing pitifully because I'm
not sharing.
As I smoke I chew, and by the time I finish my English Corona, one end
is a soggy mess.
The fire in the cigar went out. To leave my hands free for searching
for matches, I set it down in the ashtray and got up to look.
Apparently while I was out of the room, the cats bit off part of the
soggy end and proceeded to chew tobacco and spit the juice all over our
new light beige carpet. When I came back the two of them were seated on
the hearth rug, chewing tobacco, spitting in the fireplace, telling fish
stories and other lies, and whittling.
The shavings from their whittling got into the carpet along with the
tobacco juice, and Patty is furious at me.
Will someone please tell her it's not my fault?
Cheers,
Dave

--
No matter how cynical you get, it's impossible to keep up.
Hold your friends close and your enemies even closer.
When Clinton lied, no one died.

David Yehudah wrote:

Hi, All
These darn cats are always getting me into trouble with Patty, and
it's not my fault (this time)!
As some of you may remember, I like my cigars. They comfort me, they
soothe me (all right, I'm addicted), but it's more socially acceptable
than sitting around sucking my thumb.

Depends upon who you're with! (I hate cigar smoke so intensely, I'd
much RATHER you sucked your thumb, should you visit me.) ;-)

David Yehudah wrote:

Hi, All
These darn cats are always getting me into trouble with Patty, and
it's not my fault (this time)!
As some of you may remember, I like my cigars. They comfort me, they
soothe me (all right, I'm addicted), but it's more socially acceptable
than sitting around sucking my thumb.

Depends upon who you're with! (I hate cigar smoke so intensely, I'd
much RATHER you sucked your thumb, should you visit me.) ;-)

David Yehudah wrote:

Hi, All
These darn cats are always getting me into trouble with Patty, and
it's not my fault (this time)!
As some of you may remember, I like my cigars. They comfort me, they
soothe me (all right, I'm addicted), but it's more socially acceptable
than sitting around sucking my thumb.

Depends upon who you're with! (I hate cigar smoke so intensely, I'd
much RATHER you sucked your thumb, should you visit me.) ;-)

David Yehudah wrote:

Hi, All
These darn cats are always getting me into trouble with Patty, and
it's not my fault (this time)!
As some of you may remember, I like my cigars. They comfort me, they
soothe me (all right, I'm addicted), but it's more socially acceptable
than sitting around sucking my thumb.
So yesterday Spirit saw me put one (cigar, not thumb) in my mouth with
the appearance of deriving great pleasure from it and decided
whatever I was eating, she wanted some, too. Naturally I hogged the
stogie all for myself and didn't let her have any. Oreo saw Spirit
watching me and joined her. Now I have two little moochers mewing
pitifully because I'm not sharing.
As I smoke I chew, and by the time I finish my English Corona, one end
is a soggy mess.
The fire in the cigar went out. To leave my hands free for searching
for matches, I set it down in the ashtray and got up to look.
Apparently while I was out of the room, the cats bit off part of the
soggy end and proceeded to chew tobacco and spit the juice all over
our new light beige carpet. When I came back the two of them were
seated on the hearth rug, chewing tobacco, spitting in the fireplace,
telling fish stories and other lies, and whittling.
The shavings from their whittling got into the carpet along with the
tobacco juice, and Patty is furious at me.
Will someone please tell her it's not my fault?
Cheers,
Dave

ROTFLMAO!!!
--
The One-and-only Holy MosesT

David Yehudah wrote:

Hi, All
These darn cats are always getting me into trouble with Patty, and
it's not my fault (this time)!
As some of you may remember, I like my cigars. They comfort me, they
soothe me (all right, I'm addicted), but it's more socially acceptable
than sitting around sucking my thumb.
So yesterday Spirit saw me put one (cigar, not thumb) in my mouth with
the appearance of deriving great pleasure from it and decided
whatever I was eating, she wanted some, too. Naturally I hogged the
stogie all for myself and didn't let her have any. Oreo saw Spirit
watching me and joined her. Now I have two little moochers mewing
pitifully because I'm not sharing.
As I smoke I chew, and by the time I finish my English Corona, one end
is a soggy mess.
The fire in the cigar went out. To leave my hands free for searching
for matches, I set it down in the ashtray and got up to look.
Apparently while I was out of the room, the cats bit off part of the
soggy end and proceeded to chew tobacco and spit the juice all over
our new light beige carpet. When I came back the two of them were
seated on the hearth rug, chewing tobacco, spitting in the fireplace,
telling fish stories and other lies, and whittling.
The shavings from their whittling got into the carpet along with the
tobacco juice, and Patty is furious at me.
Will someone please tell her it's not my fault?
Cheers,
Dave

ROTFLMAO!!!
--
The One-and-only Holy MosesT

David Yehudah wrote:

Hi, All
These darn cats are always getting me into trouble with Patty, and
it's not my fault (this time)!
As some of you may remember, I like my cigars. They comfort me, they
soothe me (all right, I'm addicted), but it's more socially acceptable
than sitting around sucking my thumb.
So yesterday Spirit saw me put one (cigar, not thumb) in my mouth with
the appearance of deriving great pleasure from it and decided
whatever I was eating, she wanted some, too. Naturally I hogged the
stogie all for myself and didn't let her have any. Oreo saw Spirit
watching me and joined her. Now I have two little moochers mewing
pitifully because I'm not sharing.
As I smoke I chew, and by the time I finish my English Corona, one end
is a soggy mess.
The fire in the cigar went out. To leave my hands free for searching
for matches, I set it down in the ashtray and got up to look.
Apparently while I was out of the room, the cats bit off part of the
soggy end and proceeded to chew tobacco and spit the juice all over
our new light beige carpet. When I came back the two of them were
seated on the hearth rug, chewing tobacco, spitting in the fireplace,
telling fish stories and other lies, and whittling.
The shavings from their whittling got into the carpet along with the
tobacco juice, and Patty is furious at me.
Will someone please tell her it's not my fault?
Cheers,
Dave

ROTFLMAO!!!
--
The One-and-only Holy MosesT

In article , David Yehudah
wrote:

The shavings from their whittling got into the carpet along with the
tobacco juice, and Patty is furious at me.
Will someone please tell her it's not my fault?
Cheers,
Dave

Ah, Dave, it is your fault ;o) Have you started your fall decorations for the
Dog House?
Suz
Macmoosette
Thank Heavens There's Only One
=^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^=



Waiting for inspiration. Please hold while I contemplate my navel.

|\__/|
(=':'=)
(")_(")

In article , David Yehudah
wrote:

The shavings from their whittling got into the carpet along with the
tobacco juice, and Patty is furious at me.
Will someone please tell her it's not my fault?
Cheers,
Dave

Ah, Dave, it is your fault ;o) Have you started your fall decorations for the
Dog House?
Suz
Macmoosette
Thank Heavens There's Only One
=^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^=



Waiting for inspiration. Please hold while I contemplate my navel.

|\__/|
(=':'=)
(")_(")

In article , David Yehudah
wrote:

The shavings from their whittling got into the carpet along with the
tobacco juice, and Patty is furious at me.
Will someone please tell her it's not my fault?
Cheers,
Dave

Ah, Dave, it is your fault ;o) Have you started your fall decorations for the
Dog House?
Suz
Macmoosette
Thank Heavens There's Only One
=^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^= =^..^=



Waiting for inspiration. Please hold while I contemplate my navel.

|\__/|
(=':'=)
(")_(")