Help! My cat is trying to live somewhere else.

"mich" wrote in message
...

"Mary" wrote in message
.. .


Where are you?

I own a smallholding in the SW of England.

I assume there are no busy streets and that you feel he is safe
outside?


My cat goes out because he chooses to. If I tried to keep him in he
would
scratch and chew the house to bits ( it was hell the first six weeks
he was
here , when he couldnt go out)

My cats would choose to tear up the whole house just for fun if I
allowed it. Instead, I've trained them. He could be trained, too.
However--if you feel he is safe outside, this is your cat and your
decision. If he is not safe outside you will find out soon enough, eh?


I love him to bits and I would love him to be friendly but he seems
to be
more friendly with next door.
I dont know what to do.

Well, following your thinking regarding the cat's free choice, all you
can really do is suck up to him. G Be nicer to him than the
neighbor's cat. Get a new cat (if you can handle two) who stays inside
so that your boy has someone to play with indoors. One great option
would be to adopt a cat from a no-kill shelter who has always been an
indoor cat, then you would have no problem with him or her trying to
get out. There are plenty of lovely and affectionate adult cats
available. Predictability is one of the things that makes adult
shelter cats better choices than kittens. Granted, sometimes the
shelter staff knows more about some animals than others. You could
also adopt from a private party who can assure you the cat is indoor
only. If cat company is really what your boy wants, you can give it to
him at home.

From: "mich"

So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want me?
What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

Is he neutered?
________
See my cats: http://community.webshots.com/album/56955940rWhxAe
Raw Diet Info: http://www.holisticat.com/drjletter.html
http://www.geocities.com/rawfeeders/ForCatsOnly.html
Declawing Info: http://www.wholecat.com/articles/claws.htm

From: "mich"

So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want me?
What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

Is he neutered?
________
See my cats: http://community.webshots.com/album/56955940rWhxAe
Raw Diet Info: http://www.holisticat.com/drjletter.html
http://www.geocities.com/rawfeeders/ForCatsOnly.html
Declawing Info: http://www.wholecat.com/articles/claws.htm

I don't think he is unhappy with you.. he only likes to expand his
territory. A dominant cat. It is strange that the neighbors don't
complain of his visits if he attacks their cat. I suppose the catfights are
really more play.
If they are feeding him, ask them not to. Explain your worries that your
cat will become independant of you.

Elaine


--
My cats:
http://www.PictureTrail.com/gid906206
Article français sur le dégriffage
http://chakashiva.tripod.com/degriffage.index.htm

"mich" a écrit dans le message de news:
...
I got a cat back eight months ago ( adult, 4 years old, from cats
protection).

He's been a bit of a juvenile delinquent since I got him - bites ,
scratches, runs away. I've done my best to love him and feed him and give
him a lovely warm home, a box, places to stay and places to play, and a
bed to join me on at night if he wanted ( which he does), my whole house
and
my life revolves around his needs and I thought all was well. Whilst he
isn't overly friendly to me he seemed happy enough and will even let me
cuddle him occasionally.

For the past four weeks though he hasn't been home as usual and today he
disappeared all day. I had to go our looking for him. I called for him,
checked all his known walks and hide holes and was fearing the worst.
However, I found him next door!

New neighbours moved in about four weeks ago. They have a cat and
installed
a cat flap. Apparently my cat has been a regular visitor ever since. There
have even been fights between their cat and mine , and it seems mine is
always wondering in.
Well today they were out and he wondered in and didn't bother to come back
,
despite my calling him all afternoon and most of the evening.

So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want me?
What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

I don't think he is unhappy with you.. he only likes to expand his
territory. A dominant cat. It is strange that the neighbors don't
complain of his visits if he attacks their cat. I suppose the catfights are
really more play.
If they are feeding him, ask them not to. Explain your worries that your
cat will become independant of you.

Elaine


--
My cats:
http://www.PictureTrail.com/gid906206
Article français sur le dégriffage
http://chakashiva.tripod.com/degriffage.index.htm

"mich" a écrit dans le message de news:
...
I got a cat back eight months ago ( adult, 4 years old, from cats
protection).

He's been a bit of a juvenile delinquent since I got him - bites ,
scratches, runs away. I've done my best to love him and feed him and give
him a lovely warm home, a box, places to stay and places to play, and a
bed to join me on at night if he wanted ( which he does), my whole house
and
my life revolves around his needs and I thought all was well. Whilst he
isn't overly friendly to me he seemed happy enough and will even let me
cuddle him occasionally.

For the past four weeks though he hasn't been home as usual and today he
disappeared all day. I had to go our looking for him. I called for him,
checked all his known walks and hide holes and was fearing the worst.
However, I found him next door!

New neighbours moved in about four weeks ago. They have a cat and
installed
a cat flap. Apparently my cat has been a regular visitor ever since. There
have even been fights between their cat and mine , and it seems mine is
always wondering in.
Well today they were out and he wondered in and didn't bother to come back
,
despite my calling him all afternoon and most of the evening.

So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want me?
What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

"mich" wrote in message
...

New neighbours moved in about four weeks ago. They have a cat and
installed
a cat flap. Apparently my cat has been a regular visitor ever since. There
have even been fights between their cat and mine , and it seems mine is
always wondering in.
Well today they were out and he wondered in and didn't bother to come back
,
despite my calling him all afternoon and most of the evening.

So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want me?
What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

About 8 years ago my brother moved, with his 2 cats, from New York City to
California. In his first apartment, he shared a terrace with the apartment
next door. One of his cats liked to go out onto the terrace, and if the
neighbors left their door open she would go inside their apartment. She
started spending more & more time at the neighbors (who didn't have a cat)
and my brother was getting upset. He really took it personally, thinking
she didn't like him anymore. My brother was only in the apartment for 6
months, when he found a new place to live. The neighbors said they would
like to keep his cat, and he let them. I think he was still upset with her.
It might have been a blessing in disguise, because he eventually moved in
with his girlfriend who had two cats, so they ended up with a total of 3
instead of 4. I think the cat was happier being an only cat, and having two
humans making a fuss over her.

Liz

"mich" wrote in message
...

New neighbours moved in about four weeks ago. They have a cat and
installed
a cat flap. Apparently my cat has been a regular visitor ever since. There
have even been fights between their cat and mine , and it seems mine is
always wondering in.
Well today they were out and he wondered in and didn't bother to come back
,
despite my calling him all afternoon and most of the evening.

So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want me?
What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

About 8 years ago my brother moved, with his 2 cats, from New York City to
California. In his first apartment, he shared a terrace with the apartment
next door. One of his cats liked to go out onto the terrace, and if the
neighbors left their door open she would go inside their apartment. She
started spending more & more time at the neighbors (who didn't have a cat)
and my brother was getting upset. He really took it personally, thinking
she didn't like him anymore. My brother was only in the apartment for 6
months, when he found a new place to live. The neighbors said they would
like to keep his cat, and he let them. I think he was still upset with her.
It might have been a blessing in disguise, because he eventually moved in
with his girlfriend who had two cats, so they ended up with a total of 3
instead of 4. I think the cat was happier being an only cat, and having two
humans making a fuss over her.

Liz

"mich" wrote in
message ...
I got a cat back eight months ago ( adult, 4 years old...)...
I've done my best to love him and feed him...Whilst he
isn't overly friendly to me he seemed happy enough
and will even let me cuddle him occasionally...
New neighbours moved in about four weeks ago.
Apparently my cat has been a regular visitor ever since...
So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want
me? What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

You've got a George! George is the name of a cat my MIL had living
her her neighborhood for many years. We didn't know his real name, so
when my neice started calling him George, the name stuck. He acted
like more of a 'neighborhood cat' rather than a 'personal cat'. He
claimed everyone, would go into any house or approach any person in
his 'sphere of influence'. He was obviously well-fed and healthy, we
just couldn't figure out who his owner was.

After at least five years, we found out who *owned* George and found
he was a rescue cat that had been a stray for at least his first year,
then adopted. He never could seem to stay right at home, but he
always returned there after his adventures were over. His owner said
he was terribly frantic and destructive if he was confined, and the
vet recommended letting him be an indoor/outdoor cat. I guess the
theory was that if he learned to survive for a whole year without
human intervention before rescued, George must have learned a few
'rules of the road'.

Anyway, the last I heard, George was at least 12 (so far as the owner
and vet could ascertain), healthy, happy, and still roaming, but had
reduced his visits to the closest two neighbors on either side of his
home - he wouldn't cross the street anymore.

~Shelly~

"mich" wrote in
message ...
I got a cat back eight months ago ( adult, 4 years old...)...
I've done my best to love him and feed him...Whilst he
isn't overly friendly to me he seemed happy enough
and will even let me cuddle him occasionally...
New neighbours moved in about four weeks ago.
Apparently my cat has been a regular visitor ever since...
So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want
me? What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

You've got a George! George is the name of a cat my MIL had living
her her neighborhood for many years. We didn't know his real name, so
when my neice started calling him George, the name stuck. He acted
like more of a 'neighborhood cat' rather than a 'personal cat'. He
claimed everyone, would go into any house or approach any person in
his 'sphere of influence'. He was obviously well-fed and healthy, we
just couldn't figure out who his owner was.

After at least five years, we found out who *owned* George and found
he was a rescue cat that had been a stray for at least his first year,
then adopted. He never could seem to stay right at home, but he
always returned there after his adventures were over. His owner said
he was terribly frantic and destructive if he was confined, and the
vet recommended letting him be an indoor/outdoor cat. I guess the
theory was that if he learned to survive for a whole year without
human intervention before rescued, George must have learned a few
'rules of the road'.

Anyway, the last I heard, George was at least 12 (so far as the owner
and vet could ascertain), healthy, happy, and still roaming, but had
reduced his visits to the closest two neighbors on either side of his
home - he wouldn't cross the street anymore.

~Shelly~

"PawsForThought" wrote in message
...
From: "mich"

So what am I doing wrong? Why doesn't my cat want me?
What can I do to make him want to stay with me?

Is he neutered?

He is neutered.