The Chronicles of Frank II (LONG AGAIN)

Awwww. These were great!

*love* the Frank Chronicles. More please.

Tweed


"Marina" wrote in message
...
I should be working on a translation of a screenplay this weekend, but
Frank insisted I act as his secretary again, so here is the next instalment
of his memoirs. He is on a roll. We'll see if I can meet the deadline for
my job. ;o) My *paying* job. nudge nudge, Frank

________________________________

Every day, my hoomin would leave me alone for the whole day. On what she
calls weekends, we would often go on trips to the countryside, where I was
allowed in the Out. We went on those trips with the hoomin's friends, who
soon learned to speak of us as Marinanfrank, like we were one entity. This
was OK with me, as long as I could be the brains in the outfit. I soon
learned to manipulate the hoomin so she would obey my every whim, and life
was sweet.

Then one day, we went to my Favourite Place in the Whole World: the
hoomin's own island (it's *my* island now). I met a couple of cats there.
They lived with my hoomin's sister, and my hoomin said they were my father
and my sister, but I don't quite believe her. My 'dad' was mean to me and
didn't want me to come close to him or his hoomin. He said that I was
trying to steal his hoomin away from him, but I never! Why would I want
her when I had my own, very well-trained one? And my 'sister'? This wasn't
the cute little girl I had played with when I was a kitten at my mum's.
This was almost a grown-up and very grumpy ladycat, who couldn't stand the
sight of me. My own sister would never have treated me the way she treated
me. My 'dad' was an all-black cat with a little white locket on his chest,
and my 'sister' was a greenish-brown and black tortie (hoomin note: yes,
there was a definite greenish tint to her).

That summer was one of the best times of my life. There were those two
grumpy cats, but the island was big, there were hardly any other people
there, and my hoomin's family all showed me the respect due to a cat. I
explored large parts of the island, and when I got home, Meowmie would
sometimes say she had neem worried because I was gone for so long, but I
did always come home for the night, and I made sure I played with my
hoomin every day to keep her happy. Mornings and evening were the most
exciting outside, but I was happy to cuddle with my hoomin during the
night, because when it was dark, the Out did turn a bit scary.

But it seems that all good things must come to an end. We went back to
town and the little poky place where my hoomin and I lived during the
winters. She started staying away all day again, and I got thoroughly
bored. I even became a little depressed, and I would sit for long
stretches of time and just stare in front of me with an empty look on my
face.

My hoomin was worried about me, but she said she had to work, and she also
had a social life. Now, why she would need any other friends than me is
beyond my comprehension. How could she choose her hoomin friends over me?
(As an aside, I'm happy to report that she has eventually come to realise
this, and only rarely goes out to meet other hoomins these days. On the
rare occasions when she makes herself ready to go out in the evenings, I
circle her and try to remind her that she doesn't *need* other hoomins as
long as she's got me and Nikki. One day I will have her completely
convinced of this, I am sure.)

Well, my hoomin thought of a solution, of sorts, to the problem. One day
when I was home feeling bored, she went away, taking a basket with her,
and returned a few hours later. I was happy to see her, of course. Maybe
she'd brought me some nice treat in the basket? Carefully, she opened the
lid and... out jumped a little black puffy hairball, that came charging at
me. I then realised that it was a kitten, and that she was bouncing
sideways towards me, trying to look very dangerous and hissing at me!
Well, I was so surprised, I could only sit and stare, and just step a
little out of the way when she came too near. Those claws were still
small, but sharp!

Then Meowmie carried her to my litter box, where she took a sniff, and
then came back charging at me. Wherever I went, she would follow and try
to attack me. This got very old very fast, so I said to Meowmie that she
had succeeded in amusing me, but she could take back the kitten where it
came from now. For once, the hoomin didn't obey me.

The kitten went and used my litter box. The hoomin made a great fuss over
her and said she was such a clever girl. Hmph. I had used the litter box
every day since I had arrived at her place, but she never praised me. What
was the big deal? You need to go, you go to the litter box and do what you
have to do. It's a no-brainer. But the hoomin acted as if the kitten was
the world's eighth wonder for doing this. Meowmie said that was because
the kitten had come from a stables, where there were no litter boxes, and
also the kitten's mother had taken care of that stuff until now.

In the evening, I was exhausted with the kitten (whom my hoomin called
Nikki), and was very happy to see my hoomin get into bed. Finally some
peace and quiet, as I was sure the kitten would not be able to get into
the bed. Well, I was wrong. When she saw us settle down, she scrambled up,
too. She went over to Meowmie's head and licked her neck and shoulder.
Then she came over to me. I was apprehensive. Would she start attacking me
again? I was so tired, I hadn't even chased the bed mice, but they were
behaving quite well. Nikki came over and licked me! I thought, OK, we'll
see where this leads. I remembered how I'd missed my mum on my first night
with this hoomin, and stretched out a bit to let the little one cuddle up
to me. She started to lick my tummy. She started purring very loud, and I
couldn't help myself, I had to start purring along.

Then she found a teat on my tummy. I know we boycats can't produce milk,
but she didn't. She started sucking happily, and after glancing at my
hoomin to see if this was OK, and I saw she was smiling very
happy-looking, I let Nikki suck on me for a while. Then we both fell
asleep, and the hoomin, too. This was how Nikki entered my life.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

*love* the Frank Chronicles. More please.

Tweed


"Marina" wrote in message
...
I should be working on a translation of a screenplay this weekend, but
Frank insisted I act as his secretary again, so here is the next instalment
of his memoirs. He is on a roll. We'll see if I can meet the deadline for
my job. ;o) My *paying* job. nudge nudge, Frank

________________________________

Every day, my hoomin would leave me alone for the whole day. On what she
calls weekends, we would often go on trips to the countryside, where I was
allowed in the Out. We went on those trips with the hoomin's friends, who
soon learned to speak of us as Marinanfrank, like we were one entity. This
was OK with me, as long as I could be the brains in the outfit. I soon
learned to manipulate the hoomin so she would obey my every whim, and life
was sweet.

Then one day, we went to my Favourite Place in the Whole World: the
hoomin's own island (it's *my* island now). I met a couple of cats there.
They lived with my hoomin's sister, and my hoomin said they were my father
and my sister, but I don't quite believe her. My 'dad' was mean to me and
didn't want me to come close to him or his hoomin. He said that I was
trying to steal his hoomin away from him, but I never! Why would I want
her when I had my own, very well-trained one? And my 'sister'? This wasn't
the cute little girl I had played with when I was a kitten at my mum's.
This was almost a grown-up and very grumpy ladycat, who couldn't stand the
sight of me. My own sister would never have treated me the way she treated
me. My 'dad' was an all-black cat with a little white locket on his chest,
and my 'sister' was a greenish-brown and black tortie (hoomin note: yes,
there was a definite greenish tint to her).

That summer was one of the best times of my life. There were those two
grumpy cats, but the island was big, there were hardly any other people
there, and my hoomin's family all showed me the respect due to a cat. I
explored large parts of the island, and when I got home, Meowmie would
sometimes say she had neem worried because I was gone for so long, but I
did always come home for the night, and I made sure I played with my
hoomin every day to keep her happy. Mornings and evening were the most
exciting outside, but I was happy to cuddle with my hoomin during the
night, because when it was dark, the Out did turn a bit scary.

But it seems that all good things must come to an end. We went back to
town and the little poky place where my hoomin and I lived during the
winters. She started staying away all day again, and I got thoroughly
bored. I even became a little depressed, and I would sit for long
stretches of time and just stare in front of me with an empty look on my
face.

My hoomin was worried about me, but she said she had to work, and she also
had a social life. Now, why she would need any other friends than me is
beyond my comprehension. How could she choose her hoomin friends over me?
(As an aside, I'm happy to report that she has eventually come to realise
this, and only rarely goes out to meet other hoomins these days. On the
rare occasions when she makes herself ready to go out in the evenings, I
circle her and try to remind her that she doesn't *need* other hoomins as
long as she's got me and Nikki. One day I will have her completely
convinced of this, I am sure.)

Well, my hoomin thought of a solution, of sorts, to the problem. One day
when I was home feeling bored, she went away, taking a basket with her,
and returned a few hours later. I was happy to see her, of course. Maybe
she'd brought me some nice treat in the basket? Carefully, she opened the
lid and... out jumped a little black puffy hairball, that came charging at
me. I then realised that it was a kitten, and that she was bouncing
sideways towards me, trying to look very dangerous and hissing at me!
Well, I was so surprised, I could only sit and stare, and just step a
little out of the way when she came too near. Those claws were still
small, but sharp!

Then Meowmie carried her to my litter box, where she took a sniff, and
then came back charging at me. Wherever I went, she would follow and try
to attack me. This got very old very fast, so I said to Meowmie that she
had succeeded in amusing me, but she could take back the kitten where it
came from now. For once, the hoomin didn't obey me.

The kitten went and used my litter box. The hoomin made a great fuss over
her and said she was such a clever girl. Hmph. I had used the litter box
every day since I had arrived at her place, but she never praised me. What
was the big deal? You need to go, you go to the litter box and do what you
have to do. It's a no-brainer. But the hoomin acted as if the kitten was
the world's eighth wonder for doing this. Meowmie said that was because
the kitten had come from a stables, where there were no litter boxes, and
also the kitten's mother had taken care of that stuff until now.

In the evening, I was exhausted with the kitten (whom my hoomin called
Nikki), and was very happy to see my hoomin get into bed. Finally some
peace and quiet, as I was sure the kitten would not be able to get into
the bed. Well, I was wrong. When she saw us settle down, she scrambled up,
too. She went over to Meowmie's head and licked her neck and shoulder.
Then she came over to me. I was apprehensive. Would she start attacking me
again? I was so tired, I hadn't even chased the bed mice, but they were
behaving quite well. Nikki came over and licked me! I thought, OK, we'll
see where this leads. I remembered how I'd missed my mum on my first night
with this hoomin, and stretched out a bit to let the little one cuddle up
to me. She started to lick my tummy. She started purring very loud, and I
couldn't help myself, I had to start purring along.

Then she found a teat on my tummy. I know we boycats can't produce milk,
but she didn't. She started sucking happily, and after glancing at my
hoomin to see if this was OK, and I saw she was smiling very
happy-looking, I let Nikki suck on me for a while. Then we both fell
asleep, and the hoomin, too. This was how Nikki entered my life.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

*love* the Frank Chronicles. More please.

Tweed


"Marina" wrote in message
...
I should be working on a translation of a screenplay this weekend, but
Frank insisted I act as his secretary again, so here is the next instalment
of his memoirs. He is on a roll. We'll see if I can meet the deadline for
my job. ;o) My *paying* job. nudge nudge, Frank

________________________________

Every day, my hoomin would leave me alone for the whole day. On what she
calls weekends, we would often go on trips to the countryside, where I was
allowed in the Out. We went on those trips with the hoomin's friends, who
soon learned to speak of us as Marinanfrank, like we were one entity. This
was OK with me, as long as I could be the brains in the outfit. I soon
learned to manipulate the hoomin so she would obey my every whim, and life
was sweet.

Then one day, we went to my Favourite Place in the Whole World: the
hoomin's own island (it's *my* island now). I met a couple of cats there.
They lived with my hoomin's sister, and my hoomin said they were my father
and my sister, but I don't quite believe her. My 'dad' was mean to me and
didn't want me to come close to him or his hoomin. He said that I was
trying to steal his hoomin away from him, but I never! Why would I want
her when I had my own, very well-trained one? And my 'sister'? This wasn't
the cute little girl I had played with when I was a kitten at my mum's.
This was almost a grown-up and very grumpy ladycat, who couldn't stand the
sight of me. My own sister would never have treated me the way she treated
me. My 'dad' was an all-black cat with a little white locket on his chest,
and my 'sister' was a greenish-brown and black tortie (hoomin note: yes,
there was a definite greenish tint to her).

That summer was one of the best times of my life. There were those two
grumpy cats, but the island was big, there were hardly any other people
there, and my hoomin's family all showed me the respect due to a cat. I
explored large parts of the island, and when I got home, Meowmie would
sometimes say she had neem worried because I was gone for so long, but I
did always come home for the night, and I made sure I played with my
hoomin every day to keep her happy. Mornings and evening were the most
exciting outside, but I was happy to cuddle with my hoomin during the
night, because when it was dark, the Out did turn a bit scary.

But it seems that all good things must come to an end. We went back to
town and the little poky place where my hoomin and I lived during the
winters. She started staying away all day again, and I got thoroughly
bored. I even became a little depressed, and I would sit for long
stretches of time and just stare in front of me with an empty look on my
face.

My hoomin was worried about me, but she said she had to work, and she also
had a social life. Now, why she would need any other friends than me is
beyond my comprehension. How could she choose her hoomin friends over me?
(As an aside, I'm happy to report that she has eventually come to realise
this, and only rarely goes out to meet other hoomins these days. On the
rare occasions when she makes herself ready to go out in the evenings, I
circle her and try to remind her that she doesn't *need* other hoomins as
long as she's got me and Nikki. One day I will have her completely
convinced of this, I am sure.)

Well, my hoomin thought of a solution, of sorts, to the problem. One day
when I was home feeling bored, she went away, taking a basket with her,
and returned a few hours later. I was happy to see her, of course. Maybe
she'd brought me some nice treat in the basket? Carefully, she opened the
lid and... out jumped a little black puffy hairball, that came charging at
me. I then realised that it was a kitten, and that she was bouncing
sideways towards me, trying to look very dangerous and hissing at me!
Well, I was so surprised, I could only sit and stare, and just step a
little out of the way when she came too near. Those claws were still
small, but sharp!

Then Meowmie carried her to my litter box, where she took a sniff, and
then came back charging at me. Wherever I went, she would follow and try
to attack me. This got very old very fast, so I said to Meowmie that she
had succeeded in amusing me, but she could take back the kitten where it
came from now. For once, the hoomin didn't obey me.

The kitten went and used my litter box. The hoomin made a great fuss over
her and said she was such a clever girl. Hmph. I had used the litter box
every day since I had arrived at her place, but she never praised me. What
was the big deal? You need to go, you go to the litter box and do what you
have to do. It's a no-brainer. But the hoomin acted as if the kitten was
the world's eighth wonder for doing this. Meowmie said that was because
the kitten had come from a stables, where there were no litter boxes, and
also the kitten's mother had taken care of that stuff until now.

In the evening, I was exhausted with the kitten (whom my hoomin called
Nikki), and was very happy to see my hoomin get into bed. Finally some
peace and quiet, as I was sure the kitten would not be able to get into
the bed. Well, I was wrong. When she saw us settle down, she scrambled up,
too. She went over to Meowmie's head and licked her neck and shoulder.
Then she came over to me. I was apprehensive. Would she start attacking me
again? I was so tired, I hadn't even chased the bed mice, but they were
behaving quite well. Nikki came over and licked me! I thought, OK, we'll
see where this leads. I remembered how I'd missed my mum on my first night
with this hoomin, and stretched out a bit to let the little one cuddle up
to me. She started to lick my tummy. She started purring very loud, and I
couldn't help myself, I had to start purring along.

Then she found a teat on my tummy. I know we boycats can't produce milk,
but she didn't. She started sucking happily, and after glancing at my
hoomin to see if this was OK, and I saw she was smiling very
happy-looking, I let Nikki suck on me for a while. Then we both fell
asleep, and the hoomin, too. This was how Nikki entered my life.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

Exocat wrote:

Dear Frank

Our Hoomin read us your Chronicles and we all found them most
interesting.
We've gone through similar experiences between us but our hoomin isn't
talented or diligent enough to put them into words.

We'd like you to know that we very much value stories from a senior
highly experienced Gentlecat such as yourself and hope to read many
more.

Our hoomin says there has been much sadness recently - so much that
he's even leaked salty water on several occasions, some of it falling
on us if we're sitting near him - and welcomes some light relief.

So please keep educating us when you get the chance.

Purrs

Bandit, Pericles & Snowball
(dictated via Gordon the incompetent hoomin)

PS You'll be pleased to know that we've caught & devoured several
mousies between us in the last few days despite our runs in the Out
being so severely restricted in both time and range. B,P&S


Dear Bandit, Pericles and Snowball,

My hoomin says she enjoys your hoomin's posts, as they are often
insightful and to the point (what, me? long-winded?). Well done on the
hunting. I'll have to tell some tails (oops) about my hunting prowess
some day. Nikki: WHAT hunting prowess?? Everyone knows I'm the hunter
in this family, you're just the loverboy

Yours in Purrs,
Frank

--
Marina, for Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

Exocat wrote:

Dear Frank

Our Hoomin read us your Chronicles and we all found them most
interesting.
We've gone through similar experiences between us but our hoomin isn't
talented or diligent enough to put them into words.

We'd like you to know that we very much value stories from a senior
highly experienced Gentlecat such as yourself and hope to read many
more.

Our hoomin says there has been much sadness recently - so much that
he's even leaked salty water on several occasions, some of it falling
on us if we're sitting near him - and welcomes some light relief.

So please keep educating us when you get the chance.

Purrs

Bandit, Pericles & Snowball
(dictated via Gordon the incompetent hoomin)

PS You'll be pleased to know that we've caught & devoured several
mousies between us in the last few days despite our runs in the Out
being so severely restricted in both time and range. B,P&S


Dear Bandit, Pericles and Snowball,

My hoomin says she enjoys your hoomin's posts, as they are often
insightful and to the point (what, me? long-winded?). Well done on the
hunting. I'll have to tell some tails (oops) about my hunting prowess
some day. Nikki: WHAT hunting prowess?? Everyone knows I'm the hunter
in this family, you're just the loverboy

Yours in Purrs,
Frank

--
Marina, for Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

Exocat wrote:

Dear Frank

Our Hoomin read us your Chronicles and we all found them most
interesting.
We've gone through similar experiences between us but our hoomin isn't
talented or diligent enough to put them into words.

We'd like you to know that we very much value stories from a senior
highly experienced Gentlecat such as yourself and hope to read many
more.

Our hoomin says there has been much sadness recently - so much that
he's even leaked salty water on several occasions, some of it falling
on us if we're sitting near him - and welcomes some light relief.

So please keep educating us when you get the chance.

Purrs

Bandit, Pericles & Snowball
(dictated via Gordon the incompetent hoomin)

PS You'll be pleased to know that we've caught & devoured several
mousies between us in the last few days despite our runs in the Out
being so severely restricted in both time and range. B,P&S


Dear Bandit, Pericles and Snowball,

My hoomin says she enjoys your hoomin's posts, as they are often
insightful and to the point (what, me? long-winded?). Well done on the
hunting. I'll have to tell some tails (oops) about my hunting prowess
some day. Nikki: WHAT hunting prowess?? Everyone knows I'm the hunter
in this family, you're just the loverboy

Yours in Purrs,
Frank

--
Marina, for Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

Christine Burel wrote:

AWWWWW, Marina! This was great! You must give Frank (and Nikki, too)
scritches for dictating such a wonderful story!

Scritches duly given. ) Thank you, Christine.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

Christine Burel wrote:

AWWWWW, Marina! This was great! You must give Frank (and Nikki, too)
scritches for dictating such a wonderful story!

Scritches duly given. ) Thank you, Christine.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

Christine Burel wrote:

AWWWWW, Marina! This was great! You must give Frank (and Nikki, too)
scritches for dictating such a wonderful story!

Scritches duly given. ) Thank you, Christine.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki