Phil P - what you recommend from Purina

"Kiran" wrote in message
...
" wrote:

: The cat was a very healthy adult at 7 1/2 pounds...
: I had to go away and left her with others with the strict instructions
: to feed her 70 grams of Science Diet a day. The people were nice but
: not too bright. They free fed her all she wanted to eat...

It is very clear now that she is overweight and also why. You can bring
her weight down very gradually, she won't even know the difference. No
need to stress out either her or yourself.

It wouldn't be any fun for him/her if it wasn't stressful or complicated.

"Nomen Nescio" ] wrote in message
...
-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----

From: Diane

The most effective diet for diabetics is to eat measured portions of a
balanced diet, filling up on such things as leafy greens, enhanced by
regular exercise.

Oddly, this would work for most people seeking to lose weight if they
weren't into fads and quick fixes. My dad, on this diet, lost 75 lbs. at
age 65 and kept it off until his death at 88.

With all the fad diet books out there, I've thought of writing
one and cashing in.

"The First Law of Thermodynamics Diet"

There would be only one page, with one line:

"(Calories in) - (Calories out) + (Calories stored) = (Calories
remaining)"


What you should do is advertise a "scientifically proven program for
guaranteed weight loss: $199.99 + 9.95 Shipping & Handling" Whoever sends
you a check, send them back a little Post It with
"(Calories in) - (Calories out) + (Calories stored) = (Calories remaining)"
printed on them. Its legit!

Don't forget to cut me in for 50%.

Phil

"Phil P." wrote The most important aspects of a
weight loss program for cats is patience and
simplicity.


And a hard enough heart to ignore those plaintiff yowls for snacks at all
hours.

"Topaz" wrote in message ...

"Phil P." wrote The most important aspects of a
weight loss program for cats is patience and
simplicity.


And a hard enough heart to ignore those plaintiff yowls for snacks at all
hours.


Cats hold midnight meetings on how to make the most effective pitiful looks
and sounds that will make us breakdown and give in. You think I'm kidding?
While my cats were eating, I stole a book they had hidden under their bed
cushion. Here's an excerpt from their manual on how to take over a family:

"This pair looked exactly like the family I wanted, so I jumped onto the
screen door, clung there, and cried piteously.

They looked up at me from their breakfast. I knew exactly how I appeared to
them from the other side of the screen door. Irresistible! I pretended to
lose my grip on the mesh and fell off, and then climbed back up again,
crying all the time.

The woman said, "Oh look! The poor little thing, it wants to come in. Maybe
it's hungry. I'll give it some milk."

Just as I expected! I had her. All I needed was to get one paw inside the
door and---"

See? Its all a plan. Wait- it gets worse:

"I can think of no better phrase to apply when we move in upon human beings.
Overnight everything is changed for them; their homes, as well as in time
their customs and habits, are no longer their own. From then on they belong
to us.

You need have no fear about embarking upon such a program. It is only
oppor*tunities, methods, and people that differ. The take-over instinct is
in all of us, and has enabled us to survive unaltered and dominant through
thousands of years in a constantly changing world. We have always known how
to look after ourselves, nor is there any limit to what we can achieve. You
have only to glance back into your own history to verify this. In Egypt less
than five thousand years ago we made our*selves God. Dogs could be kicked
from pillar to post, but anyone who insulted or did anything to one of us
had his head cut off."

So watch out! They know exactly what they're doing! ;-)

Phil

Phil P. wrote:

I'm simply replying to an idiot savant with no common sense.

That's an oxymoron, Phil. When you find an idiot savant with common
sense, you do not have an idiot savant any more. And if I were an idiot
savant without common sense, as you put it, why are you replying to me?
Just who is the idiot here? In any event, the term High Functioning
Autistic is politically correct. Just say HFA.

You also said something about my making a big to-do over Fancy Feast.

I wanted to know the phosphorus levels, which you supplied. And also
the kilocalories. You supplied some of the info but I had to get
additional info from Purina to cover the brands of Fancy Feast that I
was purchasing for my little beastie.

Additionally, you asked me for information about the Fancy Feast. Don't
you recall? You asked me the date of the latest info - nasty fellow you
be.

I found that Purina was giving out the wrong info over the telephone.
That is not good. They were confusing the Dry Matter Basis. Apparently
the young ladies answering the phones did not know what exactly it was.

Since all Fancy Feast is 78% moisture, you divide all the numbers by
0.22 to get the Dry Matter Basis. I did speak to the manager and she
agreed and said Purina would likely check this out and correct the
information they were giving out.

As I pointed out, most likely, it's a wrong constant in their Excel
spreadsheet or something along those lines so all the numbers were
wrong.

And they gave me free coupons which is why I started this thread to ask
your advice.

Okay, it's almost midnight but I know where my cat is, inside.

Topaz wrote:
That was a beautiful K00kout meltdown.

A thing of beauty, "sweetie pie."

Are you middle eastern?

Thank you. You know the way to a man's heart, except I have an upset
tummy, hence my losing my usual sweet, kind and loving countenance.

So what do you say, we have a felafel somewhere?

wrote in message
ups.com...

Topaz wrote:
That was a beautiful K00kout meltdown.

A thing of beauty, "sweetie pie."

Are you middle eastern?

Thank you. You know the way to a man's heart, except I have an upset
tummy, hence my losing my usual sweet, kind and loving countenance.

So what do you say, we have a felafel somewhere?


So you are indeed middle eastern?

Topaz wrote:
wrote in message
ups.com...

Topaz wrote:
That was a beautiful K00kout meltdown.

A thing of beauty, "sweetie pie."

Are you middle eastern?

Thank you. You know the way to a man's heart, except I have an upset
tummy, hence my losing my usual sweet, kind and loving countenance.

So what do you say, we have a felafel somewhere?


So you are indeed middle eastern?

The Mid-Atlantic states are middle eastern, literally. And you're from
the Bible Belt, mais oui?

wrote in message
ups.com...
Phil P. wrote:

I'm simply replying to an idiot savant with no common sense.

That's an oxymoron, Phil. When you find an idiot savant with common
sense, you do not have an idiot savant any more.


Would you feel better if I just said you may have technical knowledge but no
common sense? That does seem more appropriate,





You also said something about my making a big to-do over Fancy Feast.

I wanted to know the phosphorus levels, which you supplied. And also
the kilocalories. You supplied some of the info but I had to get
additional info from Purina to cover the brands of Fancy Feast that I
was purchasing for my little beastie.

Additionally, you asked me for information about the Fancy Feast. Don't
you recall? You asked me the date of the latest info - nasty fellow you
be.


Actually, you were quoting numbers from an outdated list- that's why I
corrected you. You said only two Fancy Feast diets contained 0.80%
phosphorus
or less. I said you were wrong and showed you about 10 diets that 0.81% or
less. You insisted the Katkarma list was up to date even though "Revised:
12-Oct-2003" was clearly printed at the bottom of the page. You also said
"But Fancy Feast has not been updated probably because it's still the
same,"- which of course is not true-- as you found out after reading the
*current* Fancy Feast typical analyses on my site and receiving your own
copies from Purina.


I found that Purina was giving out the wrong info over the telephone.
That is not good. They were confusing the Dry Matter Basis. Apparently
the young ladies answering the phones did not know what exactly it was.


Actually, I think you got the product lines mixed up-- and probably confused
the person at Purina with all the trivial and extraneous babble you usually
include. FF Turkey & Giblets Feast contains 0.45% phos. "As Fed" or 2.04%
DMB. However, FF Turkey & Giblets Feast in the *Sliced* diet line contains
0.23% phos. "As Fed" which *indeed* translates into 1.04% phosphorus "DMB".
So, Purina was probably correct and you simply confused the product lines.



Since all Fancy Feast is 78% moisture, you divide all the numbers

Yes, yes yes. You don't have to explain the same formula to me that I
explained to you. See what I mean?

Phil P. wrote:

Actually, you were quoting numbers from an outdated list- that's why I
corrected you. You said only two Fancy Feast diets contained 0.80%
phosphorus
or less. I said you were wrong and showed you about 10 diets that 0.81% or
less. You insisted the Katkarma list was up to date even though "Revised:
12-Oct-2003" was clearly printed at the bottom of the page. You also said
"But Fancy Feast has not been updated probably because it's still the
same,"- which of course is not true-- as you found out after reading the
*current* Fancy Feast typical analyses on my site and receiving your own
copies from Purina.

That's about half true, not bad. I did make a mistake on 1/2 the site,
the other part was updated to 2005 but did not include Fancy Feast. The
woman who runs the site apparently decided not to update the previous
stuff even though she stated she would. So it's good this gets out in
the open and others will realize the numbers have changed in the last
two years. I sent her some emails to update her site but she never did.


Actually, I think you got the product lines mixed up-- and probably confused
the person at Purina with all the trivial and extraneous babble you usually
include. FF Turkey & Giblets Feast contains 0.45% phos. "As Fed" or 2.04%
DMB. However, FF Turkey & Giblets Feast in the *Sliced* diet line contains
0.23% phos. "As Fed" which *indeed* translates into 1.04% phosphorus "DMB".
So, Purina was probably correct and you simply confused the product lines.

This is silly and presumptuous on your part. There were not any product
lines to mix up. The numbers were simply wrong in and of themselves. If
you have .22 phosphorus as fed, then dry matter is 1.00% phosphorus,
dividing by 0.22 for the dry matter percentage. To say that it's .60%
is just plain wrong and misleading in that the phosphorus is low.
Generally, the phosphorus content of Fancy Feast is high to extremely
high. How many are okay, 10 out of 60? It may not matter but it should
be on the cans themselves, the phosphorus content and the kilocalories
or caloric content. It's not on the cans and it's not on the web site
which is inexcusable for the largest company? Who is larger than
Purina?

And about dividing by 0.22, you may know that, but the people at Purina
did not know that and others reading this post may not know it. It's a
very simple conversion though so it does not hurt to repeat for the
sake of others.