My Meowmie is Mean

Holly wrote in message
oups.com...
Sasha here,
In da dark time, I played with my meowmies shampoo.
It was fun, I slipped, and slidded all in meowmies bathtub.
When my meowmie got up dis morning, you know what she did?
She put me in da tub with da water in it. My meowmie said she have to
get the nice smell off me, she say it will make me itch if I leave it
on.
I tried to scratch and I cried but my meowmie say she give me da bath
anyway. Den when she done, she laugh and say I look like da wet rat. I
try to hide under da bed, but my meowmie she come under der and det me.
My meowmie say it to cold to be a wet rat so I hiss at my meowmie but
den she wrap me in da towel and hold me like de baby. I liked dat but I
not like da bath.

Nina Heer,

Actually I like da wadder, and watching da funny things it dos when Meowmie
washes her face in da morning. I kan't unnerstand why she duzn't use her
tung, but Mama explained dat da hoomins have smooth tongues dat don' wurk if
you wanna get cleen. I think I'd like to swim in da sink, an I sit in dere
to show her, but Meowmie always picks me out again, and sez I'm in da way.
Every other day, Meowmie gets into a liddle closet dat squirts water on her
hed! But she duzn't let me go in dere, too, Even tho I've told her I wanna
play at katching da water drops! Maybe you an me shuld trade Meowmies!

Nina

Captain and Stanley here. Our Meowmy washed us off, too, when we first came
home. But she used b*th cloths made for kitties. The cloth came out of the
package all moist and then she wiped us all over with it.

Of course, since human shampoo was in your fur, your Meowmie might have
had to use w*termonsters to chase the shampoo out. Other than that, if
your Meowmie wants to give you a b*th, you might like the damp cloths
better.

Purrs,

Captain and Stanley

I luv my meowmie too much to trade. I like to sit on the sink and watch
her put on her makeup (it smells funny) and I like to put my paw in da
water but I DONT like for all of me to get wet. My meowmie closed the
bathroom door now, so I can't go in there, but i like to mess with
meowmies stuff. My Meowmie gets in da liddle closet too but I not go
in der, I stand outside and cry till meowmie come out.

oh dey are da things like Meowmie uses on the baby hoomine that comes
over here sometimes, my meowmie use them to clean my hiney for me cause
I not do a good job. Captain and Stanley are the w*termonsters getting
my meowmie when she gets in da liddle closet?

[[oh dey are da things like Meowmie uses on the baby hoomine that comes
over here sometimes, my meowmie use them to clean my hiney for me cause
I not do a good job. Captain and Stanley are the w*termonsters getting
my meowmie when she gets in da liddle closet?]]

This is the one time that having less fur probably makes it easier on
humans. Did you ever notice that when humans get all wet, the only part of
them that looks like the drowned rat is the fur on their head? The
w*termonsters just roll right off the parts with no fur. They they wipe
off what little is left (with a perfectly good towel, and everyone knows
that folded towels are for sleeping on. Hmph.)

That's probably just as well that the w*termonsters don't stick to humans
too much, though, because humans aren't too flexible in the grooming
department. If they were furry all over, they'd have a terrible time
getting dried off. Especially since they don't have a nice rough tongue to
groom with, the poor things.

We have an idea, though. Next time we see Meowmy or Paw all wet, we'd like
to try shedding lotsa fur all over them to keep them warm. Maybe that'll
help.

Captain and Stanley

Holly wrote in message
oups.com...
I luv my meowmie too much to trade. I like to sit on the sink and watch
her put on her makeup (it smells funny) and I like to put my paw in da
water but I DONT like for all of me to get wet. My meowmie closed the
bathroom door now, so I can't go in there, but i like to mess with
meowmies stuff. My Meowmie gets in da liddle closet too but I not go
in der, I stand outside and cry till meowmie come out.


Well I like My Meowmie a lot too. She cuddles me in just da right way and
gives da best ear and chin skritches in da wurld, and knowz just how to
twitch my fishing pole toy. She wuz a little cross this morning, since I had
to chase away some kitchun greeblings in da night. Da greeblings had even
invaded her tee! I had to carry da tee into da living room and bite and
shake da bag to scare away da greeblings for good. My meowmie will
sometimes let me into da bathroom with her, but not into da little wet
closet. It worries me, since Meowmie obviously wouldn't know a greebling if
one landed on her hed.

Nina

My meowmie takes her fur off to get in da liddle box, she looks funny,
I try to play with it but meowmie gets mad.
I dink the folded towels are great for sleeping to.
I also like to sleep in my Paws work coat it smells so good.

Dear Nina,
I know it is so hard to take care of the hoomines, they not see da
greeblings. We have greeblings in Paws sock drawer, da get in der every
night so you know I havta get dem out and de only way is to take all of
Paws socks out and put dem on da bed.
But i dink my meowmie gives the best belly rubs and skritches in da
world.
Nina I am still just a baby I am only 6 months old but do you want to
be my friend? You sound like a nice kitty.

Holly wrote:
Dear Nina,
I know it is so hard to take care of the hoomines, they not see da
greeblings. We have greeblings in Paws sock drawer, da get in der
every
night so you know I havta get dem out and de only way is to take all
of
Paws socks out and put dem on da bed.
But i dink my meowmie gives the best belly rubs and skritches in da
world.
Nina I am still just a baby I am only 6 months old but do you want to
be my friend? You sound like a nice kitty.


Awww, thanks! Sure we can be frends. I'm not much older dan you, as I
wuz just seven munths old on January 21. But we obviously unnerstand
how important it is to protect our hoomins from greeblings, even wen
dey give us baths.

My Meowmie has terrible kitchun greeblings which she kant see at all. I
think dey hide in da toaster! or sumtimes around da dishes in da sink.
Sumtimes, I see greeblings popping their heads out of teekups to teez
me and my Mama. But we kant doo much about dem, because Meowmie duzn't
want da dishes broken.

Nina

"Holly" had some very interesting things
to say about My Meowmie is Mean:

oh dey are da things like Meowmie uses on the baby hoomine that comes
over here sometimes, my meowmie use them to clean my hiney for me cause
I not do a good job. Captain and Stanley are the w*termonsters getting
my meowmie when she gets in da liddle closet?

My mom likes to lie in a huge water bowl with bubbles. Dad likes the
rainy closet thing. Yes, there are watermonsters in there, but humans
seem to like the things.

Felix, who thinks humans are weird

--
"The universe is quite robust in design and appears to be
doing just fine on its own, incompetent support staff notwithstanding.
:-)" - the Dennis formerly known as (evil), MCFL