depressed.. need inspiring stories about successfully introducing new cat

"MaryL" -OUT-THE-LITTER wrote in message
...



Once again, I should have read more carefully. The "message failure" I
received says that my document is too long for your box or your box is too
full. I suspect it is the latter because I have mailed this same document
to other hotmail users. Please send e-mail telling me how you would like to
receive the document (if you want it). I'll check back this evening.

Above all, don't give up on your kitty. You simply need to commit time and
patience and work through this slowly. I can see a real sense of
companionship between my two furbabies now.

MaryL

I did post 2 months ago - and got some good advice, some contradicting advice
and some nasty posts, too. Basically, I was sleep deprived and was ready to
adopt the new cat out. Today, the cats do sleep together sporadically and both
are purrballs. I love 'em.

I did post 2 months ago - and got some good advice, some contradicting advice
and some nasty posts, too. Basically, I was sleep deprived and was ready to
adopt the new cat out. Today, the cats do sleep together sporadically and both
are purrballs. I love 'em.

hi MaryL

i have googled Duffy and Holly and read your web site as well as your
post on introducing the cats. Have also emailed you seperately...
need to ask, at any time during the introduction did your cats fight ?
Also, Duffy sounds like a sweetie - it sounds like Holly was the
dominant cat? (you mention on your web site she hissed to establish
that she was queen) For me, it is the other way around, unfortunately.

I was wondering if anybody else could recommend a book on introducing
cats as well. I did some more browsing and found a URL someone
recommended : http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv...t/?msg=13954.1

I would like to purchase or borrow a detailed book on this kind of
situation (with chapters on difficult introductions) if there is one.
I'm not giving up on this cat ... but my husband doesn't really like
her, mostly because he is protective of our resident cat and really
loves her, and he has already started suggesting we give her back. I
have started the seperation again, and they have not seen each other
for about 2 days except for when I opened arwen's room to feed her
(caught a glimpse), and then again when I switched rooms for a short
stint for resident cat to spend time in arwen's room (i had to hold
resident cat in one arm and let arwen out with the other door, etc).

thanks for the suggestions

"MaryL" -OUT-THE-LITTER wrote in message ...
"MaryL" -OUT-THE-LITTER wrote in message
...



Once again, I should have read more carefully. The "message failure" I
received says that my document is too long for your box or your box is too
full. I suspect it is the latter because I have mailed this same document
to other hotmail users. Please send e-mail telling me how you would like to
receive the document (if you want it). I'll check back this evening.

Above all, don't give up on your kitty. You simply need to commit time and
patience and work through this slowly. I can see a real sense of
companionship between my two furbabies now.

MaryL

hi MaryL

i have googled Duffy and Holly and read your web site as well as your
post on introducing the cats. Have also emailed you seperately...
need to ask, at any time during the introduction did your cats fight ?
Also, Duffy sounds like a sweetie - it sounds like Holly was the
dominant cat? (you mention on your web site she hissed to establish
that she was queen) For me, it is the other way around, unfortunately.

I was wondering if anybody else could recommend a book on introducing
cats as well. I did some more browsing and found a URL someone
recommended : http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv...t/?msg=13954.1

I would like to purchase or borrow a detailed book on this kind of
situation (with chapters on difficult introductions) if there is one.
I'm not giving up on this cat ... but my husband doesn't really like
her, mostly because he is protective of our resident cat and really
loves her, and he has already started suggesting we give her back. I
have started the seperation again, and they have not seen each other
for about 2 days except for when I opened arwen's room to feed her
(caught a glimpse), and then again when I switched rooms for a short
stint for resident cat to spend time in arwen's room (i had to hold
resident cat in one arm and let arwen out with the other door, etc).

thanks for the suggestions

"MaryL" -OUT-THE-LITTER wrote in message ...
"MaryL" -OUT-THE-LITTER wrote in message
...



Once again, I should have read more carefully. The "message failure" I
received says that my document is too long for your box or your box is too
full. I suspect it is the latter because I have mailed this same document
to other hotmail users. Please send e-mail telling me how you would like to
receive the document (if you want it). I'll check back this evening.

Above all, don't give up on your kitty. You simply need to commit time and
patience and work through this slowly. I can see a real sense of
companionship between my two furbabies now.

MaryL

"RW" wrote in message
om...
hi MaryL

i have googled Duffy and Holly and read your web site as well as your
post on introducing the cats. Have also emailed you seperately...
need to ask, at any time during the introduction did your cats fight ?
Also, Duffy sounds like a sweetie - it sounds like Holly was the
dominant cat? (you mention on your web site she hissed to establish
that she was queen) For me, it is the other way around, unfortunately.

I was wondering if anybody else could recommend a book on introducing
cats as well. I did some more browsing and found a URL someone
recommended : http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv...t/?msg=13954.1

I would like to purchase or borrow a detailed book on this kind of
situation (with chapters on difficult introductions) if there is one.
I'm not giving up on this cat ... but my husband doesn't really like
her, mostly because he is protective of our resident cat and really
loves her, and he has already started suggesting we give her back. I
have started the seperation again, and they have not seen each other
for about 2 days except for when I opened arwen's room to feed her
(caught a glimpse), and then again when I switched rooms for a short
stint for resident cat to spend time in arwen's room (i had to hold
resident cat in one arm and let arwen out with the other door, etc).

thanks for the suggestions



I re-posted the message I wrote about introducing Duffy and Holly (basically
a compilation of what you may already have read). This time, it seems to
have gone through. I don't have any books to recommend, but here are some
Internet sources you might want to check:
http://www.catcaresociety.org/intro.htm
http://www.ddfl.org/behavior/catintro.htm
http://www.cuhumane.org/topics/catcat.html
http://www.methuen-mspca.org/petcare/htm/catintro.htm
http://operationnoblefoster.org/catsanddog.htm
http://www.catsinternational.org/ (library of articles)

Yes, Holly was the dominant cat -- *very* dominant. We used to call her
"the black tornado" because she would attack every other cat in her
vicinity. The funny thing is that now that Holly and Duffy have become
friends, it is usually Duffy who pounces on Holly and chases her around.
It's always playful attacks, though. Once in awhile, Holly will turn around
and pounce on him -- just to show Duffy she's still *top cat,* I guess.
Actually, it would be hard for me to identify either of them as the true
alpha cat now. They get along beautifully, and dominance seems to change
from time to time.

No, my cats did not get into any actual fights. However, you will see from
the message I sent to you that I did a *very* slow and gradual introduction.
I think that is essential! In your case, it is important for you to
separate the cats and start all over again from the beginning.

MaryL

"RW" wrote in message
om...
hi MaryL

i have googled Duffy and Holly and read your web site as well as your
post on introducing the cats. Have also emailed you seperately...
need to ask, at any time during the introduction did your cats fight ?
Also, Duffy sounds like a sweetie - it sounds like Holly was the
dominant cat? (you mention on your web site she hissed to establish
that she was queen) For me, it is the other way around, unfortunately.

I was wondering if anybody else could recommend a book on introducing
cats as well. I did some more browsing and found a URL someone
recommended : http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv...t/?msg=13954.1

I would like to purchase or borrow a detailed book on this kind of
situation (with chapters on difficult introductions) if there is one.
I'm not giving up on this cat ... but my husband doesn't really like
her, mostly because he is protective of our resident cat and really
loves her, and he has already started suggesting we give her back. I
have started the seperation again, and they have not seen each other
for about 2 days except for when I opened arwen's room to feed her
(caught a glimpse), and then again when I switched rooms for a short
stint for resident cat to spend time in arwen's room (i had to hold
resident cat in one arm and let arwen out with the other door, etc).

thanks for the suggestions



I re-posted the message I wrote about introducing Duffy and Holly (basically
a compilation of what you may already have read). This time, it seems to
have gone through. I don't have any books to recommend, but here are some
Internet sources you might want to check:
http://www.catcaresociety.org/intro.htm
http://www.ddfl.org/behavior/catintro.htm
http://www.cuhumane.org/topics/catcat.html
http://www.methuen-mspca.org/petcare/htm/catintro.htm
http://operationnoblefoster.org/catsanddog.htm
http://www.catsinternational.org/ (library of articles)

Yes, Holly was the dominant cat -- *very* dominant. We used to call her
"the black tornado" because she would attack every other cat in her
vicinity. The funny thing is that now that Holly and Duffy have become
friends, it is usually Duffy who pounces on Holly and chases her around.
It's always playful attacks, though. Once in awhile, Holly will turn around
and pounce on him -- just to show Duffy she's still *top cat,* I guess.
Actually, it would be hard for me to identify either of them as the true
alpha cat now. They get along beautifully, and dominance seems to change
from time to time.

No, my cats did not get into any actual fights. However, you will see from
the message I sent to you that I did a *very* slow and gradual introduction.
I think that is essential! In your case, it is important for you to
separate the cats and start all over again from the beginning.

MaryL

On Thu, 12 Feb 2004 02:28:24 -0800, RW wrote:

i believe i have failed at introducing my new cat arwen into the
household (has one existing cat). too depressed to give the
details now but i'm starting all over again as of today. would like
to check if any of you have
posted long, detailed success stories about introducing a new cat to a
one-cat household, something
like a day by day diary, OR if you know of a site that has such
detailed guides.

Never did anything lengthy, but up until recently when we had more than
two cats, the introduction of a new cat usually involved little more than
some exploration, some hissy fits that lasted a day or so, and finally
just a welcome into the pile o' purr on the bed.

--
Dennis Carr - | I may be out of my mind,
http://www.dennis.furtopia.org | But I have more fun that way.
------------------------------------+-------------------------------

On Thu, 12 Feb 2004 02:28:24 -0800, RW wrote:

i believe i have failed at introducing my new cat arwen into the
household (has one existing cat). too depressed to give the
details now but i'm starting all over again as of today. would like
to check if any of you have
posted long, detailed success stories about introducing a new cat to a
one-cat household, something
like a day by day diary, OR if you know of a site that has such
detailed guides.

Never did anything lengthy, but up until recently when we had more than
two cats, the introduction of a new cat usually involved little more than
some exploration, some hissy fits that lasted a day or so, and finally
just a welcome into the pile o' purr on the bed.

--
Dennis Carr - | I may be out of my mind,
http://www.dennis.furtopia.org | But I have more fun that way.
------------------------------------+-------------------------------

I re-posted the message I wrote about introducing Duffy and Holly (basically
a compilation of what you may already have read). This time, it seems to
have gone through. I don't have any books to recommend, but here are some
Internet sources you might want to check:
http://www.catcaresociety.org/intro.htm
http://www.ddfl.org/behavior/catintro.htm
http://www.cuhumane.org/topics/catcat.html
http://www.methuen-mspca.org/petcare/htm/catintro.htm
http://operationnoblefoster.org/catsanddog.htm
http://www.catsinternational.org/ (library of articles)

Yes, Holly was the dominant cat -- *very* dominant. We used to call her
"the black tornado" because she would attack every other cat in her
vicinity. The funny thing is that now that Holly and Duffy have become
friends, it is usually Duffy who pounces on Holly and chases her around.
It's always playful attacks, though. Once in awhile, Holly will turn around
and pounce on him -- just to show Duffy she's still *top cat,* I guess.
Actually, it would be hard for me to identify either of them as the true
alpha cat now. They get along beautifully, and dominance seems to change
from time to time.

No, my cats did not get into any actual fights. However, you will see from
the message I sent to you that I did a *very* slow and gradual introduction.
I think that is essential! In your case, it is important for you to
separate the cats and start all over again from the beginning.

MaryL

Hi MaryL

THanks for everything. I will go through and post questions here if i
have any. I have started the seperation again and will take it
slowly. But reading your post above - i actually have to wonder
whether what I'm witnessing is fighting: arwen makes this weird
ambulance sound (rreeeeOOOOOWOOOOOEEEEEeeee0) while staring intensely
at resident cat (very intense, the word "evil" has come to witnessess'
minds), resident cat looks back hissing, then arwen starts after rc,
they pick up speed and arwen sinks her paws into rcs back or body, but
not teeth, there's (i can't see if claws are out) slapping and rc
claws or slaps back, then i SEE FUR in the air. i also picked up a
tiny clump of hair ATTACHED TO SKIN. is that fighting or "playing" ? i
don't see any blood or bald spots on either cat but RC is SO furry to
start with. what i know is, arwen LIKES us humans but appears not to
like having RC around. if RC so much as crosses her path she starts
that rreeeOOOOwww and staring thing. but she's the GUEST CAT - she's
supposed to be SHY. it's probably fighting.. right?

i look forward to reading the sites you recommended, and your email.