goodbye, Eros

"Seanette Blaylock" wrote in
message ...
"Pat" had some very interesting things
to say about goodbye, Eros:

You might even consider getting two ferrets that can play together, that
way
if Oscar isn't interested then at least you won't have a lonely and bored
ferret in the house too, and maybe, if you're lucky, Oscar will like
playing
with the ferrets, or at least be amused by watching them play together.

If Monique lives in California, this isn't an option. For some reason
I have no clue about [but it's probably dumb, IMO], California is the
*only* state in the US in which ferrets are not legal pets.

--

Like that stops anyone who wants one. Big difference in California between
what is legal and what just is.

Jo

On 2004-11-23, Dan M penned:

I know how hard it is to give up an animal. I experienced that with a dog
that my ex-wife and I rescued with the full intention of finding it a loving
permanent home. Even knowing from day one that the dog would be going to
live elsewhere didn't make it any easier.

I truly believe that those who provide foster services for animals are a
breed apart. I've never been so good with the "If you love something,
set it free ..." philosophy. Those who can give of themselves freely to
animals (and humans!), then let their charges go to live with another
family, are amazing. I know that our local shelter would lose a lot
more young and injured animals if not for the generous love of their
foster volunteers.

You really can't blame yourself. You were motivated by a love for animals
and an honest intention to give Eros a loving home. There was no way you
could have known that Oscar wouldn't take to Eros. The bottom line is that
you tried, you did your best, and it was just one of those things that
wasn't meant to be.

I can't help but think that I "should have" considered that Eric might get
allergies (despite his being fine with Oscar), that I "should have" guessed
that Oscar would be unreceptive to a bouncing baby boy, etc. But my brain
tells me that you are right. It just takes time to get the message to my
heart.

From the way you describe Eros it won't take long to find his OneTrueHome.

I hope so =) I really do. I called the shelter today to ask about their
declawing policy, and of course they told me that they don't declaw, but can't
keep adopters from having it done post-adoption. Still, she said that most
people around here want clawful cats, and that they have declawed cats in need
of homes, to which they'd point the others first. So I guess that's ...
somewhat heartening.

(I have a friend who would never declaw a cat, but who has expressly looked
for declawed clats when finding pets at shelters. I have mixed feelings about
that, but I guess that's fair. Declawed cats need homes too!)

What is the derivation of the all-one-word "OneTrueHome"?

--
monique

On 2004-11-23, Dan M penned:

I know how hard it is to give up an animal. I experienced that with a dog
that my ex-wife and I rescued with the full intention of finding it a loving
permanent home. Even knowing from day one that the dog would be going to
live elsewhere didn't make it any easier.

I truly believe that those who provide foster services for animals are a
breed apart. I've never been so good with the "If you love something,
set it free ..." philosophy. Those who can give of themselves freely to
animals (and humans!), then let their charges go to live with another
family, are amazing. I know that our local shelter would lose a lot
more young and injured animals if not for the generous love of their
foster volunteers.

You really can't blame yourself. You were motivated by a love for animals
and an honest intention to give Eros a loving home. There was no way you
could have known that Oscar wouldn't take to Eros. The bottom line is that
you tried, you did your best, and it was just one of those things that
wasn't meant to be.

I can't help but think that I "should have" considered that Eric might get
allergies (despite his being fine with Oscar), that I "should have" guessed
that Oscar would be unreceptive to a bouncing baby boy, etc. But my brain
tells me that you are right. It just takes time to get the message to my
heart.

From the way you describe Eros it won't take long to find his OneTrueHome.

I hope so =) I really do. I called the shelter today to ask about their
declawing policy, and of course they told me that they don't declaw, but can't
keep adopters from having it done post-adoption. Still, she said that most
people around here want clawful cats, and that they have declawed cats in need
of homes, to which they'd point the others first. So I guess that's ...
somewhat heartening.

(I have a friend who would never declaw a cat, but who has expressly looked
for declawed clats when finding pets at shelters. I have mixed feelings about
that, but I guess that's fair. Declawed cats need homes too!)

What is the derivation of the all-one-word "OneTrueHome"?

--
monique

On 2004-11-23, Yoj penned:

I can see why that would make you sad.

I hope you will be able to forgive yourself. You are neither irresponsible
nor a bad person. You had an impossible situation to deal with, and you
have Eros the chance to find a home where he will be loved and appreciated,
where there won't be another cat trying to force him out, and where he
doesn't make anyone ill. It isn't your fault that your home only fulfilled
the first of those three requirements.

Joy

Thank you =) I often have rather high expectations of myself ... I guess this
is just another example. I just wish I could have found him a home with
friends, where I could visit often! Maybe in the long run, though, this is
better. I'm sure I couldn't have kept myself from being a pet care buttinski.

--
monique

On 2004-11-23, Yoj penned:

I can see why that would make you sad.

I hope you will be able to forgive yourself. You are neither irresponsible
nor a bad person. You had an impossible situation to deal with, and you
have Eros the chance to find a home where he will be loved and appreciated,
where there won't be another cat trying to force him out, and where he
doesn't make anyone ill. It isn't your fault that your home only fulfilled
the first of those three requirements.

Joy

Thank you =) I often have rather high expectations of myself ... I guess this
is just another example. I just wish I could have found him a home with
friends, where I could visit often! Maybe in the long run, though, this is
better. I'm sure I couldn't have kept myself from being a pet care buttinski.

--
monique

"Monique Y. Mudama" wrote in message
...
I never thought I'd ever give away a pet. It's completely against
everything
I believe. And yet, this morning, I brought the sweetest, most lovely cat
I've ever met to a shelter. I feel like the worst person in the world,
even
though I know that the shelter is extremely caring, that they will keep
him
until he finds a home, and that a sweet cat like him will easily pick
himself
an owner.
snip
I'm posting as a sort of catharsis. I hope you don't mind.
Thanks for listening (reading).

--
monique

I'm so sorry, Monique.
Christine

"Monique Y. Mudama" wrote in message
...
I never thought I'd ever give away a pet. It's completely against
everything
I believe. And yet, this morning, I brought the sweetest, most lovely cat
I've ever met to a shelter. I feel like the worst person in the world,
even
though I know that the shelter is extremely caring, that they will keep
him
until he finds a home, and that a sweet cat like him will easily pick
himself
an owner.
snip
I'm posting as a sort of catharsis. I hope you don't mind.
Thanks for listening (reading).

--
monique

I'm so sorry, Monique.
Christine

Monique Y. Mudama wrote:

I never thought I'd ever give away a pet.

snip sadness

Thanks for listening (reading).

Purrs to soothe your heart, and purrs for Eros to find a loving forever
home soon.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

Monique Y. Mudama wrote:

I never thought I'd ever give away a pet.

snip sadness

Thanks for listening (reading).

Purrs to soothe your heart, and purrs for Eros to find a loving forever
home soon.

--
Marina, Frank and Nikki
marina (dot) kurten (at) pp (dot) inet (dot) fi
Pics at http://uk.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/frankiennikki/
and http://community.webshots.com/user/frankiennikki

On 2004-11-23, Pat penned:
Monique,

I once had a girl-cat like your Oscar who would get lonely when the house
was empty - which it very often was. I got her a kitten but she never
accepted him. Still, I didn't give him away, I couldn't bear to, but before
he got very old he was killed by a car. After a while, I tried again with
another potential companion. This didn't work out, either, and I gave the
kitten to a farmer. Tried again with a third, and a fourth new kitten. She
never accepted either of them either, and both were given away to new loving
homes.

I can imagine myself after that process -- I'd be a complete wreck.

It's occured to me that Oscar might "get along" with an older cat who would
ignore her much of the time, but then, what fun is that? It doesn't address
my earlier goal of getting Oscar a playmate, and I'd feel even worse having to
give up a cat who, being older, will take longer to place than a young, active
kitten.

If I had known at the time how well cats get along with ferrets, I might
have gotten her a ferret for a companion. They may not have the same
dominance issues as two cats will. It's hard to ferret-proof a dwelling but
might be worth looking into if you really want Oscar to have a playmate.

You might even consider getting two ferrets that can play together, that way
if Oscar isn't interested then at least you won't have a lonely and bored
ferret in the house too, and maybe, if you're lucky, Oscar will like playing
with the ferrets, or at least be amused by watching them play together.

Hrm. Our house looks like a computer geek bachelor pad. Way too many
tempting cords to nibble upon. Also, in my experience, no matter how
cleanly they're kept, ferrets, well, they *stink*. I've found the idea
of ferrets intriguing now and again, but Eric has put his foot down. Also,
we'd have to cage them some large portion of the time; I don't think that
would be fair.

To be honest, I think the trouble with Oscar is that she wants to do things on
her own schedule. Ani even has a song about her, "Virtue":

the one person who really knows me best
says i'm like a cat
yeah the kind of cat that you just can't pick up
and throw into your lap
no, the kind that doesn't mind being held
only when its her idea
yeah, the kind that feels what she decides to feel
when she is good and ready to feel it

Ahem. Anyway, the trouble with other critters in the house is that Oscar
wouldn't get to set the schedule. She has us well enough trained that we
tiptoe around her when she's in a sour mood and take advantage of her cuddly
moods as they come. Animals are less likely to respect, okay, coddle her that
way.

Oscar is, however, definitely getting the benefit of my guilt. I'm finding it
nearly impossible to drive within a block of a pet store without drifting in
and buying some silly toy that, like as not, she'll ignore in favor of an
invisible ball of dust. Perhaps, when my emotions are less raw, I'll
inventory our cat toy collection and donate some of it to the shelter.

--
monique