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#1
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WHO CARES!
This is the most ridiculous web group that I have ever encountered! I
mean,in alll honesty, who actually cares about cats being shaved? Im talkin to you,Sylvesters mom. The point that Im making is that you shoudnt waste your time conversing with other people about such an absurd matter. |
#2
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WHO CARES!
Isaiah Guakamoli wrote:
This is the most ridiculous web group that I have ever encountered! I mean,in alll honesty, who actually cares about cats being shaved? Im talkin to you,Sylvesters mom. The point that Im making is that you shoudnt waste your time conversing with other people about such an absurd matter. LOL....and you, not-so-kind-Sir, shouldn't waste your time trying to communicate in a public forum by way of the written (typed) word until you learn how to spell and use punctuation correctly. Back under your bridge, you teeny, tiny, insignificant troll. My most tepid regards, Sylvester's mom (still laughing out loud - what a moron) |
#3
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WHO CARES!
On 16 Feb 2007 11:45:32 -0800, "Isaiah Guakamoli"
wrote: This is the most ridiculous web group that I have ever encountered! I mean,in alll honesty, who actually cares about cats being shaved? Im talkin to you,Sylvesters mom. The point that Im making is that you shoudnt waste your time conversing with other people about such an absurd matter. -1 |
#4
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WHO CARES!
"Isaiah Guakamoli" snipped for being posted useless want a be troll Try and become a more interesting troll. Here read about it. Also try using spell checker it might make you look more reputable. In Internet terminology, a troll is a person who enters an established community such as an online discussion forum and intentionally tries to cause disruption, often in the form of posting messages that are inflammatory, insulting, incorrect, inaccurate, or off-topic, with the intent of provoking a reaction from others. Trolls can also be existing members of such a community that rarely post and often contribute no useful information to the thread, but instead make argumentative posts in an attempt to discredit another person, more often than not based on what they thought was said rather than what was actually said by the other person, concentrating almost exclusively on facts irrelevant to the point of the conversation, with the intent of provoking a reaction from others. The latter are primarily, though not always juveniles from other countries who don't have enough understanding of the language to realize that there is nothing to argue about, the points are truly irrelevant to the conversation, or they just don't care and are simply trying to cause the other poster grief with their frivolous and irrelevant arguments http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Troll What is the difference between a "troll" and a "stupid person"? If stupidity is unwillingness to learn, that still leaves out the non-stupid malicious trollers. It also leaves out the stupid people who don't engage in trolling Troll Humor More troll fun (added in December 2006, Written by Martin Calderwood) Here are a dozen more fun Trollinitions. Remember the more of these you understand the better you will be able to communicate with the Trolls you might meet wondering around in the night. As usual the 'English' equivalent is provided at the end. Trolloween: A day Trolls dress up in disguise and/or can go out at night among humans without standing out too much celebrated on October 31st. (Halloween) Troll or Treat: What young Trolls do while celebrating Trolloween. Warning to Humans, it is better to give someone dressed as a Troll a few extra treats because if it is a real troll you do not want a Troll trick played on you for being stingy. (Trick or Treat) Trollibration: A festive Troll activity held for a variety of reasons not the least of which is because they just want to. (Celebration) Trollopoly: A favorite game played by trolls who try to buy up the most troll caves, underground gardens and mineral mines to become the richest most greedy troll in the end. (Monopoly) Trollicious: Very tasty to a troll (Delicious) 'CTR' Cardiac Trollminary Resuscitation: Stomping or jumping on a Troll's chest to restart its heart. (Alternate method, hitting with a heavy wooden club several times.) (Sometimes called TTT for Trolldiac, Trollminary Trollsusatation) (CPR) Trollegiance: Troll Loyalty (Allegiance ) Trollagory: A story with a moral using a troll as a major character ( Allegory) Trollscillations: Vibrations or movement in the ground or area caused by a large troll moving nearby. (Oscillations) Rehabilitrolltions: When a troll 'goes bad' he or she is sent through Rehabilitrolltion to set him or her right again. (Rehabilitation) Trollucinations: When a Troll accidentally eats bad mushrooms or gets a high fever they sometimes see things that are not there. These are called Trollucinations. (Hallucinations) Trolltection: When you have a Troll body guard he keeps you save by providing Trolltecton at all times. (Protection) Here are a few editions to our collection of troll humor published in 2004.. These are also written by our Master Trollologist, Martin Calderwood. We hope you enjoy these fun plays on words and jokes. TROLLINITIONS 1) Anytime a troll child is naughty a large adult will punish him or her. This is known as being in the 'Big Trollble' . (trouble) 2) A Troll who travels of the country telling stories and singing songs for his keep is called a Trollbador. (Troubadour) 3) A very unique troll is said to be ' One in a tarollion' . (trillion) 4) The favorite ride in a Troll Amusement Park is the 'Trollercoaster'. (rollercoaster) 5) If a female Troll asks you want you like about her she is ' trolling' for compliments. 6) When you look at the inside of a Troll using a camera or scope you are giving him or her a 'trollenoscopy'. 7) An all-day sucker eaten by a Troll Is called a 'Trollipop'. (Lollipop) 8) When Trolls yodel they say 'Trolldaladywho'. (yodaladyhoo) 9) A big twisting wind caused by a troll him is called a 'Trollnado'. (tornado) 10) Troll's have first level schooling at a 'Trollementary School' (Elementary) TROLL HUMOR 1) Vlad Troll: Where do Troll Vampires live. Drac Troll: Trollsavania, of course. 2) Rok: Troll: "Where are Troll movies made?" Stony Troll: "Trollywood!" 3) Q. What are a Trolls favorite Shows to watch on Trollovision?" A. The Trollve o'clock news, For Whom the Bell Trolls, Trolling for Dollars, and naturally anything featuring the Norwegian Trolls Sports Team! 4) Zrok: "Do Trolls celebrate Christmas?" Brap: "Yes, mostly because of Carol." Zrok: "Carol? Who's Carol?" Brap: "Carol Troll." Zrok: "Yes, in the song "Deck The Halls". Brap: "Oh yes, Troll the Ancient Yuletide Carol." 5) "What would we ride on if we visited San Francisco?" asked the little girl Troll. "Why the Troll-ey car of course." replied Pa Troll 6) Riddle. What famous play involving Trolls do these two words represent? Equal, emaciated Pier Gaunt 7) Troll Boy: "I learned my first human words today!" Mama Troll: "Oh? What were they?" Troll Boy: "Eeeeek, a Troll! What does that mean?" Mama Troll: "He said, "Go away! I'm not ready to be around you! Now help me fix dinner." Troll Boy: "Eeeeek, a Troll!" 8) What is the difference between a Troll born North of the Arctic Circle and a Troll born South of the Arctic Circle? A Northen Troll says "God Morgen." A Southern Troll says "God Morgen ,ya all." It is said that Trolls have a great sense of humor about themselves and their world. This humor is reflected in the creation of many words and phrases that sound a lot like the words we use but that have special meaning to Trolls. Here are a few samples. (Included with each is the 'similar' word the Trolls used.) Also included are a few 'troll jokes' at the end. 1) Con-troll: A Troll who wants to take charge of everything is said to be'con-troll-ing. (control) 2) Ex-troll: When a Troll talks about him or herself or about another Troll and how good they are it is called 'ex-troll-ing' their virtues. (extol) 3) Troll-iday: Trolls celebrate many holidays like everyone else but there are also special days that only they celebrate called 'Troll-idays'. (holiday) 4) Troll-dition: Something Trolls do every year or some special action or activity done regularly especially on 'Trollidays'. (tradition) 5) Troll-erant: A Troll who has lots of patience (especially with humans) and who puts up with a lot of different things is said to be very 'Troll-erant'. (tolerant) 6) Troll-drums: A Troll who is down or depressed is said to be "In the Troll-drums" (doldrums) 7) Pa-Troll: When one or more Trolls go out and check an area or to watch for problems they are on 'Pa-Troll'. (patrol) 8) Troll-up: A Troll with loose actions or morals is called a Troll-up. (trollop) 9) Troll-doll: A really beautiful Troll is called a 'Troll-doll'. 10) Ma-Troll-nal/Pa-Troll-nal: A mommy troll has 'Ma-Troll-nal' instincts. (maternal) And of course daddy trolls have 'Pa-Troll-nal' instincts. (paternal) 11) Troll-some: Any fun and growing activity young Trolls join in is said to be 'Trollsome'. (wholesome) 12) Troll-tellite Dish: The thing Trolls have on their homes to help them watch Troll TV is a 'Troll-talite' Dish. (satellite dish) 13) Troll-ex: Either a Trolls favorite watch (or his former spouse) is called a 'Troll-ex' (Rolex) 14) Troll-egence: When a Troll gives his word to be a friend or to do something he or she are pledging their 'Troll-egiance'. (allegiance) 15) Troll-ogy: Three books about Trolls (or even read by a Troll) are called a Troll-ogy. (trilogy) Troll jokes: (all original in context if not in idea) 1) Troll School Teacher: Okay Drog, use Norway, Sweden and Denmark in a sentence. Drog: Okay, dar is Nor-vay yew can Sveden da coffee wit sugar and Denmark it as sour. 2) Troll School Teacher: How does a Scottish Troll express gratitude fer da sheep he is 'bout ta eat? Jarg: Dat's easy. He says 'taks fer mutton' 3) Troll School Teacher: Why should Trolls never us drugs? Angh: Because Trolls don't want to be stoned 4) Troll Father: Vat is yer favorite type of music son? Troll Son: Hard rock music of course. 5) Troll Mother: I thought I told yew not ta listen ta dat religious music. Troll Daughter: I know but vhen I heardit I fell in love wit it. Troll Mother: And vat is da name of dis song? Troll Daughter: Rock of Ages! It says 'Rock of Ages Cliff fer me, let me hide myself in-dee'. |
#5
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WHO CARES!
You give him a -1. I would not even rate him it was not even a half way bad
attempt at being a Troll "dgk" wrote in message news On 16 Feb 2007 11:45:32 -0800, "Isaiah Guakamoli" wrote: This is the most ridiculous web group that I have ever encountered! I mean,in alll honesty, who actually cares about cats being shaved? Im talkin to you,Sylvesters mom. The point that Im making is that you shoudnt waste your time conversing with other people about such an absurd matter. -1 |
#6
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WHO CARES!
On Feb 16, 1:33 pm, "Matthew" wrote:
You give him a -1. I would not even rate him it was not even a half way bad attempt at being a Troll "dgk" wrote in message news On 16 Feb 2007 11:45:32 -0800, "Isaiah Guakamoli" wrote: This is the most ridiculous web group that I have ever encountered! I mean,in alll honesty, who actually cares about cats being shaved? Im talkin to you,Sylvesters mom. The point that Im making is that you shoudnt waste your time conversing with other people about such an absurd matter. -1 everyone up to this point, EXCEPT the original poster, THANK YOU for making me howlingly-laugh-out-loud just now, reading your responses. That was a refreshing break from mostly crying over the last several days. (My beloved cat died on Monday.) Now I am intrigued and need to go read about shaving cats. |
#7
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WHO CARES!
On 16 Feb, 20:32, "Matthew" wrote:
"Isaiah Guakamoli" snipped for being posted useless want a be troll Try and become a more interesting troll. Here read about it. Also try using spell checker it might make you look more reputable. In Internet terminology, a troll is a person who enters an established community such as an online discussion forum and intentionally tries to cause disruption, often in the form of posting messages that are inflammatory, insulting, incorrect, inaccurate, or off-topic, with the intent of provoking a reaction from others. Trolls can also be existing members of such a community that rarely post and often contribute no useful information to the thread, but instead make argumentative posts in an attempt to discredit another person, more often than not based on what they thought was said rather than what was actually said by the other person, concentrating almost exclusively on facts irrelevant to the point of the conversation, with the intent of provoking a reaction from others. The latter are primarily, though not always juveniles from other countries who don't have enough understanding of the language to realize that there is nothing to argue about, the points are truly irrelevant to the conversation, or they just don't care and are simply trying to cause the other poster grief with their frivolous and irrelevant arguments http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interne...ikipedia:Troll What is the difference between a "troll" and a "stupid person"? If stupidity is unwillingness to learn, that still leaves out the non-stupid malicious trollers. It also leaves out the stupid people who don't engage in trolling Troll Humor More troll fun (added in December 2006, Written by Martin Calderwood) Here are a dozen more fun Trollinitions. Remember the more of these you understand the better you will be able to communicate with the Trolls you might meet wondering around in the night. As usual the 'English' equivalent is provided at the end. Trolloween: A day Trolls dress up in disguise and/or can go out at night among humans without standing out too much celebrated on October 31st. (Halloween) Troll or Treat: What young Trolls do while celebrating Trolloween. Warning to Humans, it is better to give someone dressed as a Troll a few extra treats because if it is a real troll you do not want a Troll trick played on you for being stingy. (Trick or Treat) Trollibration: A festive Troll activity held for a variety of reasons not the least of which is because they just want to. (Celebration) Trollopoly: A favorite game played by trolls who try to buy up the most troll caves, underground gardens and mineral mines to become the richest most greedy troll in the end. (Monopoly) Trollicious: Very tasty to a troll (Delicious) 'CTR' Cardiac Trollminary Resuscitation: Stomping or jumping on a Troll's chest to restart its heart. (Alternate method, hitting with a heavy wooden club several times.) (Sometimes called TTT for Trolldiac, Trollminary Trollsusatation) (CPR) Trollegiance: Troll Loyalty (Allegiance ) Trollagory: A story with a moral using a troll as a major character ( Allegory) Trollscillations: Vibrations or movement in the ground or area caused by a large troll moving nearby. (Oscillations) Rehabilitrolltions: When a troll 'goes bad' he or she is sent through Rehabilitrolltion to set him or her right again. (Rehabilitation) Trollucinations: When a Troll accidentally eats bad mushrooms or gets a high fever they sometimes see things that are not there. These are called Trollucinations. (Hallucinations) Trolltection: When you have a Troll body guard he keeps you save by providing Trolltecton at all times. (Protection) Here are a few editions to our collection of troll humor published in 2004.. These are also written by our Master Trollologist, Martin Calderwood. We hope you enjoy these fun plays on words and jokes. TROLLINITIONS 1) Anytime a troll child is naughty a large adult will punish him or her. This is known as being in the 'Big Trollble' . (trouble) 2) A Troll who travels of the country telling stories and singing songs for his keep is called a Trollbador. (Troubadour) 3) A very unique troll is said to be ' One in a tarollion' . (trillion) 4) The favorite ride in a Troll Amusement Park is the 'Trollercoaster'. (rollercoaster) 5) If a female Troll asks you want you like about her she is ' trolling' for compliments. 6) When you look at the inside of a Troll using a camera or scope you are giving him or her a 'trollenoscopy'. 7) An all-day sucker eaten by a Troll Is called a 'Trollipop'. (Lollipop) 8) When Trolls yodel they say 'Trolldaladywho'. (yodaladyhoo) 9) A big twisting wind caused by a troll him is called a 'Trollnado'. (tornado) 10) Troll's have first level schooling at a 'Trollementary School' (Elementary) TROLL HUMOR 1) Vlad Troll: Where do Troll Vampires live. Drac Troll: Trollsavania, of course. 2) Rok: Troll: "Where are Troll movies made?" Stony Troll: "Trollywood!" 3) Q. What are a Trolls favorite Shows to watch on Trollovision?" A. The Trollve o'clock news, For Whom the Bell Trolls, Trolling for Dollars, and naturally anything featuring the Norwegian Trolls Sports Team! 4) Zrok: "Do Trolls celebrate Christmas?" Brap: "Yes, mostly because of Carol." Zrok: "Carol? Who's Carol?" Brap: "Carol Troll." Zrok: "Yes, in the song "Deck The Halls". Brap: "Oh yes, Troll the Ancient Yuletide Carol." 5) "What would we ride on if we visited San Francisco?" asked the little girl Troll. "Why the Troll-ey car of course." replied Pa Troll 6) Riddle. What famous play involving Trolls do these two words represent? Equal, emaciated Pier Gaunt 7) Troll Boy: "I learned my first human words today!" Mama Troll: "Oh? What were they?" Troll Boy: "Eeeeek, a Troll! What does that mean?" Mama Troll: "He said, "Go away! I'm not ready to be around you! Now help me fix dinner." Troll Boy: "Eeeeek, a Troll!" 8) What is the difference between a Troll born North of the Arctic Circle and a Troll born South of the Arctic Circle? A Northen Troll says "God Morgen." A Southern Troll says "God Morgen ,ya all." It is said that Trolls have a great sense of humor about themselves and their world. This humor is reflected in the creation of many words and phrases that sound a lot like the words we use but that have special meaning to Trolls. Here are a few samples. (Included with each is the 'similar' word the Trolls used.) Also included are a few 'troll jokes' at the end. 1) Con-troll: A Troll who wants to take charge of everything is said to be'con-troll-ing. (control) 2) Ex-troll: When a Troll talks about him or herself or about another Troll and how good they are it is called 'ex-troll-ing' their virtues. (extol) 3) Troll-iday: Trolls celebrate many holidays like everyone else but there are also special days that only they celebrate called 'Troll-idays'. (holiday) 4) Troll-dition: Something Trolls do every year or some special action or activity done regularly especially on 'Trollidays'. (tradition) 5) Troll-erant: A Troll who has lots of patience (especially with humans) and who puts up with a lot of different things is said to be very 'Troll-erant'. (tolerant) 6) Troll-drums: A Troll who is down or depressed is said to be "In the Troll-drums" (doldrums) 7) Pa-Troll: When one or more Trolls go out and check an area or to watch for problems they are on 'Pa-Troll'. (patrol) 8) Troll-up: A Troll with loose actions or morals is called a Troll-up. (trollop) 9) Troll-doll: A really beautiful Troll is called a 'Troll-doll'. 10) Ma-Troll-nal/Pa-Troll-nal: A mommy troll has 'Ma-Troll-nal' instincts. (maternal) And of course daddy trolls have 'Pa-Troll-nal' instincts. (paternal) 11) Troll-some: Any fun and growing activity young Trolls join in is said to be 'Trollsome'. (wholesome) 12) Troll-tellite Dish: The thing Trolls have on their homes to help them watch Troll TV is a 'Troll-talite' Dish. (satellite dish) 13) Troll-ex: Either a Trolls favorite watch (or his former spouse) is called a 'Troll-ex' (Rolex) 14) Troll-egence: When a Troll gives his word to be a friend or to do something he or she are pledging their 'Troll-egiance'. (allegiance) 15) Troll-ogy: Three books about Trolls (or even read by a Troll) are called a Troll-ogy. (trilogy) Troll jokes: (all original in context if not in idea) 1) Troll School Teacher: Okay Drog, use Norway, Sweden and Denmark in a sentence. Drog: Okay, dar is Nor-vay yew can Sveden da coffee wit sugar and Denmark it as sour. 2) Troll School Teacher: How does a Scottish Troll express gratitude fer da sheep he is 'bout ta eat? Jarg: Dat's easy. He says 'taks fer mutton' 3) Troll School Teacher: Why should Trolls never us drugs? Angh: Because Trolls don't want to be stoned 4) Troll Father: Vat is yer favorite type of music son? Troll Son: Hard rock music of course. 5) Troll Mother: I thought I told yew not ta listen ta dat religious music. Troll Daughter: I know but vhen I heardit I fell in love wit it. Troll Mother: And vat is da name of dis song? Troll Daughter: Rock of Ages! It says 'Rock of Ages Cliff fer me, let me hide myself in-dee'. ROFLOL, Brilliant & hilarious too Thank you for making this ugly posting something worth laughing about. well done M! S;o) |
#8
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WHO CARES!
In oups.com,
Isaiah Guakamoli purred: This is the most ridiculous web group that I have ever encountered! I mean,in alll honesty, who actually cares about cats being shaved? Im talkin to you,Sylvesters mom. The point that Im making is that you shoudnt waste your time conversing with other people about such an absurd matter. Too many snow days - time for spring to come and get the brats back in their classrooms! |
#9
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WHO CARES!
I have something for you Big Al it is a couple of poems that all cat
lover's should have. this one I added something to it one night I still get teary eyed when I read them Rainbow Bridge Revised Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, whom had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. Their bright eyes are intent; Their eager bodies quiver. Suddenly they begin to run from the group, flying over the green grass, Their legs carrying them faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friends finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress their beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your friends, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together.... *** "And nothing but peace and the love of your Dear Friends"**** * Author Unknown of the original poem a few lines have been changed * *** This should be added *** ****"Always remember We will be there even if you can't see us. We are always Watching and Waiting. That cool puff of air you feel across your cheek, that fleeting touch, the feeling you have that I was walking across your bed, that moment you swear you can hear us, that flicker of movement out of the corner of your eye. Is just our way of saying I love you and I am with you always even in the darkest time We Will Always Be There. Till our paws touch again always know we love you and cherished our special time together"*** Ending Added By: ( NO MORE RETAIL ) This was my original display name a.p.c (alt.pets.cats) On the spur of the moment You can share joy and happiness With the blink of an eye You can disclose sadness and mourning In next to no time there will be someone Helping you along for better or worse Whether you are living next door Or a continent and an ocean away No one cares About gender, age, race, religion and education You may never meet cat or human face to face But you sure meet a friend when you need one author Michael IF TEARS COULD BUILD A STAIRWAY If tears could build a stairway. and memories a lane. I would walk right up to Heaven and bring you back again. No farewell words were spoken No time to say "Goodbye." You were gone before I knew it. and only Gods knows why. My heart still aches with sadness. and secret tears still flow. What it meant to love you- No one can ever know. But now I know you want me to mourn for you no mo To remember all the happy times. life still has much in store Since you'll never be forgotten. I pledge to you today- A hollowed place within my heart. is where you will always stay. Author unknown "Big Al" wrote in message oups.com... On Feb 16, 1:33 pm, "Matthew" wrote: You give him a -1. I would not even rate him it was not even a half way bad attempt at being a Troll "dgk" wrote in message news On 16 Feb 2007 11:45:32 -0800, "Isaiah Guakamoli" wrote: This is the most ridiculous web group that I have ever encountered! I mean,in alll honesty, who actually cares about cats being shaved? Im talkin to you,Sylvesters mom. The point that Im making is that you shoudnt waste your time conversing with other people about such an absurd matter. -1 everyone up to this point, EXCEPT the original poster, THANK YOU for making me howlingly-laugh-out-loud just now, reading your responses. That was a refreshing break from mostly crying over the last several days. (My beloved cat died on Monday.) Now I am intrigued and need to go read about shaving cats. |
#10
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WHO CARES!
You like that It is my version of a troll bake
"sheelagh" wrote in message oups.com... On 16 Feb, 20:32, "Matthew" wrote: "Isaiah Guakamoli" snipped for being posted useless want a be troll Try and become a more interesting troll. Here read about it. Also try using spell checker it might make you look more reputable. In Internet terminology, a troll is a person who enters an established community such as an online discussion forum and intentionally tries to cause disruption, often in the form of posting messages that are inflammatory, insulting, incorrect, inaccurate, or off-topic, with the intent of provoking a reaction from others. Trolls can also be existing members of such a community that rarely post and often contribute no useful information to the thread, but instead make argumentative posts in an attempt to discredit another person, more often than not based on what they thought was said rather than what was actually said by the other person, concentrating almost exclusively on facts irrelevant to the point of the conversation, with the intent of provoking a reaction from others. The latter are primarily, though not always juveniles from other countries who don't have enough understanding of the language to realize that there is nothing to argue about, the points are truly irrelevant to the conversation, or they just don't care and are simply trying to cause the other poster grief with their frivolous and irrelevant arguments http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interne...ikipedia:Troll What is the difference between a "troll" and a "stupid person"? If stupidity is unwillingness to learn, that still leaves out the non-stupid malicious trollers. It also leaves out the stupid people who don't engage in trolling Troll Humor More troll fun (added in December 2006, Written by Martin Calderwood) Here are a dozen more fun Trollinitions. Remember the more of these you understand the better you will be able to communicate with the Trolls you might meet wondering around in the night. As usual the 'English' equivalent is provided at the end. Trolloween: A day Trolls dress up in disguise and/or can go out at night among humans without standing out too much celebrated on October 31st. (Halloween) Troll or Treat: What young Trolls do while celebrating Trolloween. Warning to Humans, it is better to give someone dressed as a Troll a few extra treats because if it is a real troll you do not want a Troll trick played on you for being stingy. (Trick or Treat) Trollibration: A festive Troll activity held for a variety of reasons not the least of which is because they just want to. (Celebration) Trollopoly: A favorite game played by trolls who try to buy up the most troll caves, underground gardens and mineral mines to become the richest most greedy troll in the end. (Monopoly) Trollicious: Very tasty to a troll (Delicious) 'CTR' Cardiac Trollminary Resuscitation: Stomping or jumping on a Troll's chest to restart its heart. (Alternate method, hitting with a heavy wooden club several times.) (Sometimes called TTT for Trolldiac, Trollminary Trollsusatation) (CPR) Trollegiance: Troll Loyalty (Allegiance ) Trollagory: A story with a moral using a troll as a major character ( Allegory) Trollscillations: Vibrations or movement in the ground or area caused by a large troll moving nearby. (Oscillations) Rehabilitrolltions: When a troll 'goes bad' he or she is sent through Rehabilitrolltion to set him or her right again. (Rehabilitation) Trollucinations: When a Troll accidentally eats bad mushrooms or gets a high fever they sometimes see things that are not there. These are called Trollucinations. (Hallucinations) Trolltection: When you have a Troll body guard he keeps you save by providing Trolltecton at all times. (Protection) Here are a few editions to our collection of troll humor published in 2004.. These are also written by our Master Trollologist, Martin Calderwood. We hope you enjoy these fun plays on words and jokes. TROLLINITIONS 1) Anytime a troll child is naughty a large adult will punish him or her. This is known as being in the 'Big Trollble' . (trouble) 2) A Troll who travels of the country telling stories and singing songs for his keep is called a Trollbador. (Troubadour) 3) A very unique troll is said to be ' One in a tarollion' . (trillion) 4) The favorite ride in a Troll Amusement Park is the 'Trollercoaster'. (rollercoaster) 5) If a female Troll asks you want you like about her she is ' trolling' for compliments. 6) When you look at the inside of a Troll using a camera or scope you are giving him or her a 'trollenoscopy'. 7) An all-day sucker eaten by a Troll Is called a 'Trollipop'. (Lollipop) 8) When Trolls yodel they say 'Trolldaladywho'. (yodaladyhoo) 9) A big twisting wind caused by a troll him is called a 'Trollnado'. (tornado) 10) Troll's have first level schooling at a 'Trollementary School' (Elementary) TROLL HUMOR 1) Vlad Troll: Where do Troll Vampires live. Drac Troll: Trollsavania, of course. 2) Rok: Troll: "Where are Troll movies made?" Stony Troll: "Trollywood!" 3) Q. What are a Trolls favorite Shows to watch on Trollovision?" A. The Trollve o'clock news, For Whom the Bell Trolls, Trolling for Dollars, and naturally anything featuring the Norwegian Trolls Sports Team! 4) Zrok: "Do Trolls celebrate Christmas?" Brap: "Yes, mostly because of Carol." Zrok: "Carol? Who's Carol?" Brap: "Carol Troll." Zrok: "Yes, in the song "Deck The Halls". Brap: "Oh yes, Troll the Ancient Yuletide Carol." 5) "What would we ride on if we visited San Francisco?" asked the little girl Troll. "Why the Troll-ey car of course." replied Pa Troll 6) Riddle. What famous play involving Trolls do these two words represent? Equal, emaciated Pier Gaunt 7) Troll Boy: "I learned my first human words today!" Mama Troll: "Oh? What were they?" Troll Boy: "Eeeeek, a Troll! What does that mean?" Mama Troll: "He said, "Go away! I'm not ready to be around you! Now help me fix dinner." Troll Boy: "Eeeeek, a Troll!" 8) What is the difference between a Troll born North of the Arctic Circle and a Troll born South of the Arctic Circle? A Northen Troll says "God Morgen." A Southern Troll says "God Morgen ,ya all." It is said that Trolls have a great sense of humor about themselves and their world. This humor is reflected in the creation of many words and phrases that sound a lot like the words we use but that have special meaning to Trolls. Here are a few samples. (Included with each is the 'similar' word the Trolls used.) Also included are a few 'troll jokes' at the end. 1) Con-troll: A Troll who wants to take charge of everything is said to be'con-troll-ing. (control) 2) Ex-troll: When a Troll talks about him or herself or about another Troll and how good they are it is called 'ex-troll-ing' their virtues. (extol) 3) Troll-iday: Trolls celebrate many holidays like everyone else but there are also special days that only they celebrate called 'Troll-idays'. (holiday) 4) Troll-dition: Something Trolls do every year or some special action or activity done regularly especially on 'Trollidays'. (tradition) 5) Troll-erant: A Troll who has lots of patience (especially with humans) and who puts up with a lot of different things is said to be very 'Troll-erant'. (tolerant) 6) Troll-drums: A Troll who is down or depressed is said to be "In the Troll-drums" (doldrums) 7) Pa-Troll: When one or more Trolls go out and check an area or to watch for problems they are on 'Pa-Troll'. (patrol) 8) Troll-up: A Troll with loose actions or morals is called a Troll-up. (trollop) 9) Troll-doll: A really beautiful Troll is called a 'Troll-doll'. 10) Ma-Troll-nal/Pa-Troll-nal: A mommy troll has 'Ma-Troll-nal' instincts. (maternal) And of course daddy trolls have 'Pa-Troll-nal' instincts. (paternal) 11) Troll-some: Any fun and growing activity young Trolls join in is said to be 'Trollsome'. (wholesome) 12) Troll-tellite Dish: The thing Trolls have on their homes to help them watch Troll TV is a 'Troll-talite' Dish. (satellite dish) 13) Troll-ex: Either a Trolls favorite watch (or his former spouse) is called a 'Troll-ex' (Rolex) 14) Troll-egence: When a Troll gives his word to be a friend or to do something he or she are pledging their 'Troll-egiance'. (allegiance) 15) Troll-ogy: Three books about Trolls (or even read by a Troll) are called a Troll-ogy. (trilogy) Troll jokes: (all original in context if not in idea) 1) Troll School Teacher: Okay Drog, use Norway, Sweden and Denmark in a sentence. Drog: Okay, dar is Nor-vay yew can Sveden da coffee wit sugar and Denmark it as sour. 2) Troll School Teacher: How does a Scottish Troll express gratitude fer da sheep he is 'bout ta eat? Jarg: Dat's easy. He says 'taks fer mutton' 3) Troll School Teacher: Why should Trolls never us drugs? Angh: Because Trolls don't want to be stoned 4) Troll Father: Vat is yer favorite type of music son? Troll Son: Hard rock music of course. 5) Troll Mother: I thought I told yew not ta listen ta dat religious music. Troll Daughter: I know but vhen I heardit I fell in love wit it. Troll Mother: And vat is da name of dis song? Troll Daughter: Rock of Ages! It says 'Rock of Ages Cliff fer me, let me hide myself in-dee'. ROFLOL, Brilliant & hilarious too Thank you for making this ugly posting something worth laughing about. well done M! S;o) |
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